Why are you still in Thailand?

[off road pat]

No more adventure in your life ???? Adventure that's one reason I'm here , and I got plenty of that in +/- 28 years around....did Off road trips all over Thailand, Laos, Malaysia (Peninsula), Cambodia and Burma (Myanmar) Did half of those alone before I met my great wife, now with the wife who loves it even more.

Couldn't do that in my country....

[bazza40]

It's sweet that you think that, but nobody 50 looks 30.

Put her next to her daughter who is 28, and it's not easy to tell which is which.

[SoiBiker]

It's sweet that you think that, but nobody 50 looks 30.

Put her next to her daughter who is 28, and it's not easy to tell which is which.

Bless you. That's both deluded, and a touch creepy as well.

[stickylies]

I rarely these days deal with the 'How much you pay? questions but sometimes I just answer 'Too Much' and it short-circuits the conversation. One time way back a Brit asked me how much I paid for a RT ticket to USA and then he answered 'That's too much!' and I said: "Well the next one is free -- is THAT too much?"

95% of the conversations I used to have with Thai were about money probably because discussing food (that other priority in life) with me is too complicated. After a couple of years I got fed and gave them the MAI ROO or LOEM answer. And if they ask me if something (at home) is expensive I confuse them by telling it's NOT...which it ain't as most of the stuff they ask me about (phones, food, etc) is actually more expensive here. Big discounters in the West sell similar crap as Lotus and 7/11 but much cheaper. Massage, hairdresser, restaurants, rent etc.are cheap here though.

Sounds like you've found yourself a swell bunch of companions.

never looked for anything let alone found... i have lived in satun (2 years), mae sariang (3 years) and thong pha phum (2 years). am somewhere totally different since 2010 (never bkk never isaan and never pattaya or phuket) and the questions have remained the same. thai are obsessed with money. period. just back from pharmacy buying a little cream and 4 different people in 4 different places have asked me how much i paid. the pharmacist herself did not ask any money related question, lucky me.... but she did ask how long i have been in los and if i can eat spicy food.

[bkk6060]

This is not a post...it is a rant demonetizing anyone who vents here on TVF about their expectations being unmet while living in Thailand...

I just love posters who set the tone of the posting by castigating those who may not agree with them...

You should be so proud...

Isn't that what this forum is about. Expressing opinions and talking about experiences?

Unlike some, they are expressing the truth about what they think of the place.

Hopefully, it helps other not make some stupid mistakes.

[khunPer]

My Situation:

Lived in Thailand for over 10 straight years

Found the Thai wife, have a kid

Moved back to Florida USA - Back to Corporate America, near the beach, climate same although cooler than Thailand, lots of Thai people, numerous Thai restaurants, Thai grocery stores to buy anything Thai and cook your own.

So basically everything is the same as in Thailand except it is much safer and cleaner where I live.

What is not the same:

Have huge income

Nicer house and vehicles

Nicer places to visit on weekends, holidays, cruises, etc. It's Florida!

Kid is in an excellent school, will be able to go on to Uni and actually have a future when he graduates

We even have a Thai temple

As is in Thailand, we have Thai's here working at Walmart just getting by but most appear to prefer it to Thailand

»So what is keeping you in Thailand?«

For me, it’s because I have a much better life here, than at “home” – not because I had a bad life there, it’s just better here; and so is the weather.

But we are all individuals and have different backgrounds – and age – so what may be a success for some, may not work that well for others; and like OP says, most of us know sad stories about folks who need to return to nothing...

But just to compare with OP, my “not the same” situation seem almost opposite:

My Situation:

–Lived in Thailand for more than 10 straight years

–Found a lovely Thai girlfriend and we have a kid

–Found an outstanding spot by the beach to build a house, pretty close to what I could only dream about; climate warmer than Denmark and about same all year round, 28-34 centigrade, and only about two month rain-season; some Scandinavians and other foreigners living here (but I hardly mingle); numerous of farang restaurants, grocery stores stock almost all kind of farang stuff (including my homeland butter and cheese etc.) I can buy and cook myself.

So basically everything is the same as in Denmark, except the weather is much better, I feel more save than Copenhagen and suburbs, and the neighborhood I live in is nice and clean.

What is not the same:

–Have higher income due to legally be freed from some of the Danish “you name-it, we tax-it” rules; furthermore I can buy little more for my money

–Nicer house, and I even for years had a vehicle (American) I could only dream about at “home”, now I drive a similar nice car as I had at home, but it was cheaper here

–Nicer places to visit on weekends, holidays, cruises, etc. it's Samui and her sisters, and only 50 minutes flight from Bangkok or 1½ hour from Hong Kong and Singapore!

–My daughter is in an excellent EP-school – better than public schools at “home”, when I compare and ask friends – she will be able to attend University just 10 kilometers from where we live, and actually have a future when she graduates (in Denmark she may just be unemployed).

We even have a Christian church (or two); however I’m not religious and we visit the temples instead...

We have Tesco with Thai workers instead of Walmart – same, same, but different – but we don’t have snow and White Christmas, unless we take a trip to Bangkok’s “Snow Town” (artificial); however snow is also rare in Denmark and there are no mountains, so if you wish to ski, you’ll have to travel to Norway or the Alps, same here, I’ve heard there should be excellent ski-sport in Korea, maybe try that one winter.

What kind of future do you see your daughter having graduating from a Thai Uni, which is a worthless piece of paper outside of Thailand and graduate salaries are 15,000 thb per month?

To my knowledge half or more of the students at the local Samui branch of Surat Thani University comes from abroad – so it cannot be that bad – and job positions, even locally, pays better than normal minimum salary. With some practical experience on top, good positions abroad may also be an option – if she wish so – but perhaps she choose something completely different, when Uni-time comes...

[JAFO]

One can guarantee any kind of post which hits a nerve with some people will result in negativity flowing in leaps and bounds.

One can see it is the same posters by name that are always the most combative and resentful.

Many people, especially the negative ones, will never post anything factual other than their own misguided opinions because they know they really have no facts to post.

It does not matter to anyone what I post, were I live, why I moved, etc. But for some, the message seems to get them rightfully upset time and time again.

These posters can not see past their own point of view for one reason or another.

One poster here is happy about hearing about a job in Texas. He is happy, good for him. Do you want to bash him because he failed in Thailand or be happy because he is happy? Most bashings here come out of jealousy from those that have zero options.

2 other posters contacted me and live right here in Florida. Very happy after returning from Thailand. Do they need to be bashed as failures.

The point of this whole post was stir emotions which is always does.

Have negative posters commenting on the reasons why I did this or that. They have no clue but continue to act like they have all the answers when they have none.

The idea of a post is hopefully get some factual stories about what is possible and why and how people made them possible.

Did I fail because I moved to Florida? Fail at what? I am not a Thai citizen or resident. Some might think they are but until you become a legal resident or citizen, you are not.

For those of you that think moving from Thailand is a failure? What about those moved from their own countries to Thailand? Are they failures too because you said so?

This post did highlight some good factual experience. Options should always be planned.

Because Thailand has be great to you doesn't mean it won't be without hardship?

Anyone remember 1997? Could happen again, then where will you be with no options?

I would hope every single grown man on this forum would understand what is best for him, his family and their future.

When you start thinking you have all the answers for people you don't even know, you are already out of options.

If you do something, anything and have the balls to post up the facts, that is not being pompous, that is being honest.

If your whole life exists to post your opinions, well who really cares? show some factual accomplishments in Thailand.

If you live your life one day at a time, one week at a time, don't be surprised when life throws you a curveball.

The fact remains the country has not gotten any easier for foreigners the past 20 years, quite the opposite.

There are many Thai people in Florida that have managed to move here, open their own businesses, buy land and houses and cars not being married to Americans or farangs.

What exactly have you, not your wife, been able to do in their country?

Short of your wife having land and a house, what exactly have you the expat achieved? Landing a job as a school teacher.

I moved back to Florida, entire family is well adjusted and happy as hell. Our son will get a first world education and have his own future. Did I fail Thailand? I bet they were happy as hell to see another farang leave. I did not need anyones advice, just made it happen. It happened. Nothing pompous about it.

No need to be sad, jealous, combative. It is what you make of it and no one else matters except your family. My family has their entire lives to adjust to the USA, where they are finding out they can fit in and be accepted, go to school and be what ever they want to be.

Good Lord. Why would you spend all this time writing this stuff? If you left, you left. Your happy Your happy. It was the right decision for you. What point are you trying to make?

Before you go off with another half page dissertation( justification) aimed at me, I am an exec at a large US company, I am married to a wonderful Thai wife, no children. We have a beautiful home in Northern Thailand. We rent a nice house here in the states by choice. I have been in Thailand on 2 to 4 year runs, I love it there. Simple as that. I never understood why foreigners (You included OP) get so spun up around the axle about not being a citizen. I know I will never be a citizen, doesn't matter to me in the least bit. There are no perks to being a citizen anyway unlike all the things you can bilk off the US once a citizen. I am not trapped in any location but clearly if I stayed in the states my cash outlay, laws and requirements are 10X more than they will ever be in Thailand. I will semi retire and move back home very soon to relax and get off the hamster wheel. I am glad my wife got to come see America and live here. She finally got to see it for what it is, and what it isn't. I know many Asian people that migrated here and are utterly miserable and would love to go back to their home country but are now trapped so deeply in debt and cannot leave. to a great degree your post makes it seems like living in the states is like fluffly little bears and big fields of flowers and its all rosy. I get some of what you are talking about in your post but struggle to see what you had hoped to achieve by it.

Anyway I hope you feel better.

[bkk6060]

There is a huge benefit of being a Thai citizen.

If you have worked you get 500 baht a month in retirement.

HAHAHAHHA, what a fricken sad joke.

[JLCrab]

I rarely these days deal with the 'How much you pay? questions but sometimes I just answer 'Too Much' and it short-circuits the conversation. One time way back a Brit asked me how much I paid for a RT ticket to USA and then he answered 'That's too much!' and I said: "Well the next one is free -- is THAT too much?"

95% of the conversations I used to have with Thai were about money probably because discussing food (that other priority in life) with me is too complicated. After a couple of years I got fed and gave them the MAI ROO or LOEM answer. And if they ask me if something (at home) is expensive I confuse them by telling it's NOT...which it ain't as most of the stuff they ask me about (phones, food, etc) is actually more expensive here. Big discounters in the West sell similar crap as Lotus and 7/11 but much cheaper. Massage, hairdresser, restaurants, rent etc.are cheap here though.

Sounds like you've found yourself a swell bunch of companions.

never looked for anything let alone found... i have lived in satun (2 years), mae sariang (3 years) and thong pha phum (2 years). am somewhere totally different since 2010 (never bkk never isaan and never pattaya or phuket) and the questions have remained the same. thai are obsessed with money. period. just back from pharmacy buying a little cream and 4 different people in 4 different places have asked me how much i paid. the pharmacist herself did not ask any money related question, lucky me.... but she did ask how long i have been in los and if i can eat spicy food.

I have lived in Thailand since JAN 2004 and rarely if ever hear those questions from Thais at least not anymore. In Thailand some of those questions are just idle chit-chat and maybe someone practicing their English. In USA, however, if someone asks "What do you do?", as I mentioned in my original post, they are sizing you up to see if you will be of greater advantage to them than they will be to you and, if the latter, they will say "Well nice meeting you" and you never hear from or see them again.

If a Thai asks me in Thai if I have a wife or a girlfriend I just say: BOTH.

[bazza40]

It's sweet that you think that, but nobody 50 looks 30.

Put her next to her daughter who is 28, and it's not easy to tell which is which.

Bless you. That's both deluded, and a touch creepy as well.

You're the one with the sick mind. Do you get off on watching reruns of "The Graduate"?

[MaeJoMTB]

the best is telling someone about a farang in Thailand...

"met a bloke in the bar. his girlfriend worked there. he bought her a house. she has 3 kids. she divorced him. he lost it all."

then we both laugh......this is not like a divorce in some western country.

Odd,

That sounds exactly like my divorce in the UK.

[gemguy]

^^^ "sense of adventure in their blood and wanderlust in their soul".

Most are retired , lonely and looking for a wife.

That may have been the case 25 years ago.

Very few of them are retied people that did not come here many times before and or stay here for several months before they decide Thailand was suitable for retiring.

Is it the best place to be as a retired person.....not necessarily ...but apparently it is amongst the most popular places to retire because you can live a very comfortable, more or less, care free lifestyle and enjoy yourself just as much or more than any other places you could or would retire.....and that could be near anywhere.....while even Ethiopia is suitable for some people.

Mind you all of what is said is speaking on behalf of men who realize that there are extra activities on hand here in Thailand that are not so easily accessed in many other countries where you could attire.

We all know what the extras are so no need to elaborate but even without all of "that" the country is still said to be one of the most interesting countries to live in and or for many to retire in.

While some do not like or grow to dislike Thailand for a number of reason there are more than enough that love it , so to speak, while they desire to live long term in Thailand but can not arrange it while more than enough do eventually arrange it so they can live here long term.

When they get bored or fed up or what ever they think they can move on but I can assure you nearly all of them will have a special place in their hearts for Thailand.

When questioned as to why they choose to live in Thailand it is one of those question that is some difficult to answer without elaborating on all the reason why they do choose to live in Thailand.

In the end the answer is: "Why not .......while I am enjoying myself here and content enough living here and I can always leave when I want.

Many use Bangkok as their base and travel all around the region but continue to stay in Thailand and using Thailand as their base while they like the surrounding countries but they will admit that Thailand has all or more than enough of what a person could ever need while they can easily ignore the negative aspects of living in Thailand realizing that near every or anywhere else is not all that much better to live ...so why not Thailand???

The OP talks as if he knows better than others and he is more astute because he is in America and he is doing better in America than he was doing here...or so he implies....but in the end he is there and we are here and you do what you want and we will do what we want as there is no right or wrong when deciding to stay here rather just choices that people make to live here or not to live here

Cheers

[Nowisee]

You are not one of these farang cyclist who are distinctly unfriendly are you MaeJoMTB?

The Thais wave at me, and I wave back.

I even speak to random foreigners at the top.

Cycling is a community thing.

Had a puncture on the way down the other day, 4 Thais on the way up insisted on fixing it for me.

Then another passed by and pumped it up with his new CO2 pump. Everything covered in ice.

I was totally prepared to walk down.

Why would you ride without carrying a spare tube, patch kit and air?

[villagefarang]

You are not one of these farang cyclist who are distinctly unfriendly are you MaeJoMTB?

The Thais wave at me, and I wave back.

I even speak to random foreigners at the top.

Cycling is a community thing.

Had a puncture on the way down the other day, 4 Thais on the way up insisted on fixing it for me.

Then another passed by and pumped it up with his new CO2 pump. Everything covered in ice.

I was totally prepared to walk down.

Why would you ride without carrying a spare tube, patch kit and air?

I don’t carry those things when I ride, either. My rides are anywhere from 50 to 100 km but I am not exactly a million miles from civilization. Someone will help or you can usually walk or catch a ride to a roadside tire repair place or like me when I broke a spoke recently and didn’t want to hobble home perhaps damaging my bike, my wife drove out and picked me up. I can go for a year or more without incident and keep my bike in good shape so I don’t feel it is necessary to carry extra gear.

[theguyfromanotherforum]

I am in Thailand because at this point in life it suits me the best.

Just the same like OP came to Thailand at one point in his life because it suited him the best.

This is why I find the whole essay so god damn hypocritical.

[Nowisee]

You are not one of these farang cyclist who are distinctly unfriendly are you MaeJoMTB?

The Thais wave at me, and I wave back.

I even speak to random foreigners at the top.

Cycling is a community thing.

Had a puncture on the way down the other day, 4 Thais on the way up insisted on fixing it for me.

Then another passed by and pumped it up with his new CO2 pump. Everything covered in ice.

I was totally prepared to walk down.

Why would you ride without carrying a spare tube, patch kit and air?

I don’t carry those things when I ride, either. My rides are anywhere from 50 to 100 km but I am not exactly a million miles from civilization. Someone will help or you can usually walk or catch a ride to a roadside tire repair place or like me when I broke a spoke recently and didn’t want to hobble home perhaps damaging my bike, my wife drove out and picked me up. I can go for a year or more without incident and keep my bike in good shape so I don’t feel it is necessary to carry extra gear.

wow, just that I am surprised, I always carried even if just short ride. Fits easily in the bike bag and takes all of 5 min to patch.

even when I ride motorcycle. I carry what I need to patch a tire.

keeping bike in good shape is good. mechanical failures and flats are not related to that.

maybe it comes from riding miles way out in the middle of the desert.

[MaeJoMTB]

Why would you ride without carrying a spare tube, patch kit and air?

My first road bike flat ever, in over 2,000km.

Not to mention you can't pump 90psi with a hand pump.

[Seann]

Most sane human beings realize that there are good things about every country on Earth and if they could afford it would probably travel all over the world. I know I would like nothing better than to hop from one private plane to 5 Star hotel to private plane. Ramen in Japan, Christmas in Paris, etc.

[Nowisee]

Why would you ride without carrying a spare tube, patch kit and air?

My first road bike flat ever, in over 2,000km.

Not to mention you can't pump 90psi with a hand pump.

sure you can

[stickylies]

Thai cyclists on the other hand are always friendly and say hello when they are passing me on their road bike or MTBs.

true BUT in my case these very same people were laughing with me as recent as 5 years ago. 555. in my street i was the only farang and cyclist and my neighbours said the most amazing things (behind my back of course) back in the days when it wasn't fashionable to ride a pushbike. now they all ride own bikes to show off. FACE vs GROUP. 555. this being said, i have had mechanical faillure twice sofar, pretty remote, and was ALWAYS brought home free of charge by one of the farmers. how about that ;-)

[stickylies]

Something else I do not understand.

I see a lot of of Falang in their 50's with their families one or two kids. Especially in the north. But in Pattaya also.

They look like decent guys.

Clean, well kept, clean clothes, maybe a little belly but groomed.

They are with wives who look terrible. Maybe around age 40, messy hair, fat, t-shirt, dolphin shorts and flip flops.

Plus, absolutely no makeup! In fact, I have not seen many Thai women over 40 who wear makeup.

What is the attraction? You can come to the USA and meet a pig who actually speaks English and maybe even has a job at WalMart, if that is what you are looking for.

Just to add, I rarely see a smile from any of them.

jup. fat ánd ignorant... and the horror: long sharpened toenails. add to that a bunch of obese adhd sugar kids. living the dream. 555

[stickylies]

never looked for anything let alone found... i have lived in satun (2 years), mae sariang (3 years) and thong pha phum (2 years). am somewhere totally different since 2010 (never bkk never isaan and never pattaya or phuket) and the questions have remained the same. thai are obsessed with money. period. just back from pharmacy buying a little cream and 4 different people in 4 different places have asked me how much i paid. the pharmacist herself did not ask any money related question, lucky me.... but she did ask how long i have been in los and if i can eat spicy food.

I have lived in Thailand since JAN 2004 and rarely if ever hear those questions from Thais at least not anymore. In Thailand some of those questions are just idle chit-chat and maybe someone practicing their English.

sure, especially cuz they ask it in thai (i only know 1 person here who speaks a little EN)

idle chit chat or not, it's an obsession with money and in 95% of the cases it's PEEEEEEENG.

[stickylies]

You are not one of these farang cyclist who are distinctly unfriendly are you MaeJoMTB?

The Thais wave at me, and I wave back.

I even speak to random foreigners at the top.

Cycling is a community thing.

Had a puncture on the way down the other day, 4 Thais on the way up insisted on fixing it for me.

Then another passed by and pumped it up with his new CO2 pump. Everything covered in ice.

I was totally prepared to walk down.

Why would you ride without carrying a spare tube, patch kit and air?

I don’t carry those things when I ride, either. My rides are anywhere from 50 to 100 km but I am not exactly a million miles from civilization. Someone will help or you can usually walk or catch a ride to a roadside tire repair place or like me when I broke a spoke recently and didn’t want to hobble home perhaps damaging my bike, my wife drove out and picked me up. I can go for a year or more without incident and keep my bike in good shape so I don’t feel it is necessary to carry extra gear.

same here. i like the risky side of life and not the seedy side of life. 555

[GarryP]

Who'd have thought, from why are you still here, to why don't you carry a puncture repair kit. Couldn't have gone more off topic, even if intentional.

[Gary A]

 

Something else I do not understand.

I see a lot of of Falang in their 50's with their families one or two kids. Especially in the north. But in Pattaya also.

They look like decent guys.

Clean, well kept, clean clothes, maybe a little belly but groomed.

They are with wives who look terrible. Maybe around age 40, messy hair, fat, t-shirt, dolphin shorts and flip flops.

Plus, absolutely no makeup! In fact, I have not seen many Thai women over 40 who wear makeup.

What is the attraction? You can come to the USA and meet a pig who actually speaks English and maybe even has a job at WalMart, if that is what you are looking for.

Just to add, I rarely see a smile from any of them.

jup. fat ánd ignorant... and the horror: long sharpened toenails. add to that a bunch of obese adhd sugar kids. living the dream. 555

 

Times change. When I first moved over her in 1991, I rarely saw any fat women. Today it's a common sight. I also see cakes, donuts and fast food places all over the country. I would say that many Thai women age very well. The woman in the picture is standing in front of a house that looks to be in a western country. That lady looks to be addicted to fast food. At 49 years old, my wife is very fit and she does look much younger than her age. Maybe she is fit because she still actively farms. Rice farming and cutting sugar cane is REALLY hard work. I try to convince her that she doesn't have to work in the fields but she says it is her duty. I can't say that I understand her thinking but it is up to her. Maybe one reason is that she is tighter than the bark on a tree and doesn't want to pay her workers any more than she has to.

[SoiBiker]

That 'woman' in the picture!

Priceless.

[MaeJoMTB]

The woman in the picture is standing in front of a house that looks to be in a western country. That lady looks to be addicted to fast food.

I would say it's an English man dressed as a Thai and called Ting Tong (MacaDangDang) from Tooting.

(Little Britain, onscreen husband Dudley Punt))

[stickylies]

MTB: at least one person on TVF with some culture ;-)

[JLCrab]

never looked for anything let alone found... i have lived in satun (2 years), mae sariang (3 years) and thong pha phum (2 years). am somewhere totally different since 2010 (never bkk never isaan and never pattaya or phuket) and the questions have remained the same. thai are obsessed with money. period. just back from pharmacy buying a little cream and 4 different people in 4 different places have asked me how much i paid. the pharmacist herself did not ask any money related question, lucky me.... but she did ask how long i have been in los and if i can eat spicy food.

I have lived in Thailand since JAN 2004 and rarely if ever hear those questions from Thais at least not anymore. In Thailand some of those questions are just idle chit-chat and maybe someone practicing their English.

sure, especially cuz they ask it in thai (i only know 1 person here who speaks a little EN)

idle chit chat or not, it's an obsession with money and in 95% of the cases it's PEEEEEEENG.

I guess I must hang out with the 5% of the cases that don't bother to ask.

[bwpage3]

We've been here for 19+ years to include numerous long trips back to the US. Every time we go back to the US, we think to ourselves, "isn't this better than what we have in Thailand?," to the point that we've considered moving back many times. But when we return to our small home in the jungle, it takes all of a week or two to remind ourselves that what we have here is not attainable in the US, no matter how much money we have. And so we remain.

Different strokes for different folks..........if you're happy in the US, then be happy. But don't deride others who choose to live here....especially when you failed at trying to do so.

And for what it's worth.....I can count the number of Thai/American marriages that are over the 25 year mark on many many more hands than those that have failed. Several nearing the 50 year mark.

Does that count the 700 farangs that got divorced in Khon Kaen in one month?

I have lived in Khon Kaen for over 10 years, and to be honest, your quotation of 700 farangs it the biggest BS I have ever read, or even, the most likely I will ever read on Thai Visa.

Never got a response from OP.

Here is a direct quote from Thai Law

There are no clear statistics for how many Thai/foreign marriages last, although in 2007 in the north-eastern province of Khon Kaen 142 divorce cases were filed from Thais married to foreigners in just three months, far more than the norm. At the time a leading official said it seemed that the Thai women had become disillusioned with their relationships.