Advice about Bar Girl

[wallyonthebeach]

I'm new to the forum and am leaving Thailand today after my first holiday here. I was hoping seasoned veterans to Thailand could offer up some advice about a strange situation I found myself in.

A little background. Yesterday in Phuket I met a bar girl. She doesn't speak much English and is young (20/21). I got loaded with some mates and walked into a bar along Bangla and immediately saw her across the bar chatting and drinking with a British bloke. She was giving me the eye (I'm no Beckham, but the bloke buying her drinks was an ogre). I never "bar fined" a girl, but knew the basic rundown and told my mates I'd pay her 5000 baht to go with anyone but that bloke she was with.

Long story short, my mates and I left and returned later. She saw me and waved to me and we chatted a bit. The night got away from us and next thing we know its 3am. The girl asks me if im taking her home, and after 10+ mekhong cokes I wasn't going to say no.

Not to get into detail, but I was drunk so the "fun" was a bit tempered (it wasn't the crowning achievement of my sex life). Also, after she quickly showered before the "deed", I asked if I should shower(not knowing it was expected) and she giggled and got on the bed. So I didn't. After the eruption we chatted on the bed for hours (until almost 7am). We exchanged numbers, I paid her short time rate, and she left.

We have been texting since and had some deep conversation about her work, the morals and money behind it, etc. Her bluntly honest responses were interspersed with the usual she misses me, will wait for me. But after a little more conversation (not flirty stuff, I'm talking deeper again) she invited me to her hometown in Isan.

This leads to my question: Should I visit? She gave me an exact date when to visit because she will be there in a few months. I love Thailand and think this girl is very cute and sweet. She knows I was laid off from work and so have very limited means (by western standards). The only time she brought up money at all aside from me paying her was when she asked if I was single and what my salary was the first night we spoke (I told her "not enough, but it pays the utilities").

I know wanting something serious from this is doomed from the start, but I did enjoy her company for the short time I was with her. It seems odd that she'd invite me to her home so quickly, but my last girlfriend in the West did the same exact thing (met once, texted, I visited, etc. That was long distance as well).

Going to her village would be a unique experience and it'd give me a reason to make one more trip to Thailand before returning to a 9-5. What are your thoughts?

[Rob13]

So you want to know if you should go visit your hooker or not? I think you should, it's only proper.

[brewsterbudgen]

Spending time in a Thai/Isaan village is a great experience, despite the culture shock. If you don't have much money you have nothing to lose! Don't expect much "fun", if you stay with her in the family home, but it will be culturally stimulating. Have fun.

[sas_cars]

lol. another troll spotted

[MaeJoMTB]

Don't send money, she's with someone else.

While you're with her, you pay her.

That's all there is to it.

As for the Village,

It's good for 2 nights, once in your life, don't take much money,

Plan a way out, there's never transport out of the village.

And nobody in the village will help your escape.

PS

The 'exact date' will be when none of her other customers are visiting.

Edited February 16, 2016 by MaeJoMTB

[wallyonthebeach]

I definitely don't intend on sending money under any circumstances. And yes, she told me I'd stay at her home with her family. I expect I'll spend a few 100 pounds taking people to dinner or on drinks, but I'd view it as rewarding the hospitality. Is it a Thai custom to bring a gift for the home?

[dirtycash]

she obviously loves you...go !!

[NickJ]

What was it the spider said to the fly.....

[MaeJoMTB]

I definitely don't intend on sending money under any circumstances. And yes, she told me I'd stay at her home with her family. I expect I'll spend a few 100 pounds taking people to dinner or on drinks, but I'd view it as rewarding the hospitality. Is it a Thai custom to bring a gift for the home?

It's a Thai custom to pay for the sexual service she provides.

She's a prostitute, you're a customer.

If you usually take your hookers family to dinner in your home country ..... do it here.

If you don't ..... then don't do it here either.

It ain't rocket science.

Edited February 16, 2016 by MaeJoMTB

[rocketboybkk]

In your second paragraph you said she doesn't speak much English but you been having in depth conversations

I think you is a liar

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[wallyonthebeach]

In your second paragraph you said she doesn't speak much English but you been having in depth conversations

I think you is a liar

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Using the translate function on her phone while she was with me and then after I woke up I used my laptop to access thai2english and google translate to attempt to be as clear as I could when texting.

[Rob13]

Sunday dinner with your hooker's family, what could be better.

[TheMysteriousMrTesla]

Where are you now?

Still in Thailand?

Get on that flight, don't be tempted to stay that extra few days.

[MaeJoMTB]

Sunday dinner with your hooker's family, what could be better.

Getting drunk with her dad?

[Crossy]

Sunday dinner with your hooker's family, what could be better.

Getting drunk with her dad?

Or her "brother" perhaps.

[wallyonthebeach]

Where are you now?

Still in Thailand?

Get on that flight, don't be tempted to stay that extra few days.

BKK leaving in a bit. The invite was to return in about a month when she gets time away from thr bar. Which is appealing because my mates didn't want to go to Burma or Laos this trip.

I just don't understand why she'd invite me to her home? Is that a normal Thai hooker thing to do?

p.s. - to all those slagging me off about having a hooker, i was drunk, in thailand, final night with excess baht... never paid for sex before, im only 24. maybe in another 24 years ill be a repeat offender hahah

[MJKT2014]

>This leads to my question: Should I visit? She gave me an exact date when to visit because she will be there in a few months.

As you say you are now back in blighty, I'd follow up on this one night stand with a bar girl and get on the flight and travel plans booked for the exact date she mentions. What could possibly go wrong?

[sas_cars]

Sunday dinner with your hooker's family, what could be better.

Getting drunk with her dad?

Or her "brother" perhaps.

A brother which turns out actually to be her husband/bf?

[Berkshire]

Where are you now?

Still in Thailand?

Get on that flight, don't be tempted to stay that extra few days.

BKK leaving in a bit. The invite was to return in about a month when she gets time away from thr bar. Which is appealing because my mates didn't want to go to Burma or Laos this trip.

I just don't understand why she'd invite me to her home? Is that a normal Thai hooker thing to do?

p.s. - to all those slagging me off about having a hooker, i was drunk, in thailand, final night with excess baht... never paid for sex before, im only 24. maybe in another 24 years ill be a repeat offender hahah

Geez man, hookers do all kinds of strange stuff. Doesn't mean they're in love with you. Thai women don't fall in love with guys they have to Google translate to communicate with.

I don't think you're for real, but if you are, let me ask you this: While you're back in farangland, how does it feel to know that your new love is going to be doing the nasty with some drunk, sweaty, smelly, 60 year old gargantuan? Every night? Do you get all sentimental?

[Crossy]

Where are you now?

Still in Thailand?

Get on that flight, don't be tempted to stay that extra few days.

BKK leaving in a bit. The invite was to return in about a month when she gets time away from thr bar. Which is appealing because my mates didn't want to go to Burma or Laos this trip.

I just don't understand why she'd invite me to her home? Is that a normal Thai hooker thing to do?

p.s. - to all those slagging me off about having a hooker, i was drunk, in thailand, final night with excess baht... never paid for sex before, im only 24. maybe in another 24 years ill be a repeat offender hahah

Just wondering, where is home? No particular reason.

[MaeJoMTB]

I just don't understand why she'd invite me to her home? Is that a normal Thai hooker thing to do?

I've done it once ....... it's not something many are daft enough to repeat.

A week in a primitive hell hole where you get to pay for everything for everyone.

No internet, no air con, hot as hell and twice as humid, living in a stick hut with no toilet or shower.

And they won't let you leave, until you run out of money.

Probably some of us have done it with the same girl ........ and we're in our 60's!

[fey]

your lucky an eruption happened at all after 10 drinks

i have found that the first time you see a girl if she is with another dude it never works out long term, but that's just a personal philosophy I have developed over time, your results may differ

i did the isaan trip with a girl this once on my second trip (but not with a hooker)
I am glad to this day i as able to met her family and see how she lives at home.
it was a great experience and also stressful, but one which i would not give back for anything

Edited February 16, 2016 by fey

[wallyonthebeach]

So you all think it may be dangerous to visit? I intended on visiting SE Asia again within the year. I also understand she probably has a child (or 2) and possibly a boyfriend/husband. But, I think the experience of a visiting a Thai village with a local would be eyeopening and also, who knows, some chaps do sometimes marry bargirls... I wouldn't say I love her or she loves me. And I the 60 year old smelly bloke doesn't really phase me, part of life

[Chicog]

She's not like all the rest.

Neither is he.

[sipi]

Go for it. What could possibly go wrong?

[papayasalad]

you pay a prostitute and you want go see her after 2 days. she is tricking you in something for sure and you will feel sorry soon

[Rob13]

Be sure to post some pics.

[DaddyWarbucks]

Your education is just beginning.

Many of us on this forum have graduated already... some of us, cum laude.

[thaiduncankk]

Which province is your 'beloved' from ?

[wallyonthebeach]

At this point I wish I was trolling. But I've gotten some serious, mature responses which I greatly appreciate.