Oh those subservient Thai ladies!

[connda]

"When your Thai wife wants something, there is no negotiating. They make your life great 5 out of 7 days so they figure you owe them anyway"

Yours might, but dont tar all "Thai Wives" with the same brush.

Unlike my Western wives, my Thai wife plays the female role as I play the male. My Western wives? They wanted to wear the pants and a dress, and weren't necessarily good at wearing either.

In my Thai/Farang marriage, there is balance and relative harmony; no relationship is perfect. However, my wife is also one of the most assertive Thai women I've ever met. But there is give and take in our relationship, along with negotiation. I don't think that Thai women are 'subservient', I think that most Thai males are macho jerks. Relatively that makes Thai women look subservient in the eyes of outsiders. But I'm happier with my Thai wife and the light baggage that came with her than I ever was with any of my Western wives and the humongous load of emotional and material baggage that they carried around with them. Your mileage may vary. I'm only speaking for myself.

Edited April 17, 2016 by connda

[klauskunkel]

Each week we’ll post a picture that illustrates some of the best parts about living in Thailand. ............. and so we see a photo of some poor girl who looks as if face is peppered with shrapnel. If this represents what you deem to be the best part of living in Thailand, then you have my sympathy.

she also has an extremely bad comb-over...

[connda]

Each week we’ll post a picture that illustrates some of the best parts about living in Thailand. ............. and so we see a photo of some poor girl who looks as if face is peppered with shrapnel. If this represents what you deem to be the best part of living in Thailand, then you have my sympathy.

she also has an extremely bad comb-over...

I thought she had come off her motorcycle and face-planted on the pavement, but no, I guess those are piercings. Not my concept of beauty, but whatever trips your trigger. Some pierced, tatted up guy out there probably thinks she's hot. Not my cup of tea.

[riceyummm]

After 10 years in the US my first Thai wife started complaining about that toilet seat thing. I couldn't believe it.

[koolkarl]

Subservient... no way.

But I would have to mention, most are exceedingly greedy and I have never stepped foot into any bar.

[rogeroc]

Why not try the bars then. Pick the right ones (bit of judgement / bit of luck) treat with the respect everyone deserves and they give exceedingly good value for money.

[soc]

My wife always does the cleaning: dishes, house and clothing.

When she came with me to America and made some friends, they got around to telling her that we should share doing these things and it should all be equal.

I don't take her back there anymore.

She's happy.

I'm happy.

When l took my Filipina wife to Australia, it wasn't long before the white women got on to her about "doing things for me" that they wouldn't do for their long-suffering husbands.

"What, you pack his lunch for work? My hubbie has to pack his own"

"You wash the car when he is at work, thats his job."

"You give him sex every night? my husband should be so lucky"

And so it went.

l never forced her to do any of this, she regarded it as her duty as l had a hard,hot, dusty job & l was bringing home the money(which l turned over to her).

l think they were terrified that if their husbands ever found out, then they would leave & get a Filipina or the white women would have to start treating their husbands right.

l used to sit, amazed, in the lunch room, listening to my workmates talking about being "on a promise" that they might get sex that night if they did the right thing by their demanding wives.

There was no point in telling them of my situation, they would never have believed me anyway. Sad.

[BritManToo]

^^

In Thailand you don't need a wife, food is available outside every workplace, having your car cleaned is cheap, and hiring a woman to do what you want for as long as you want is easy and affordable. But you're right, the guys back home would never believe it.

[rogeroc]

Ironically it is now the case that so many Western men (in Western countries) are the subservient ones. Many even pretend to be 'feminist', probably the only way they can 'sow their oats'

Edited April 17, 2016 by rogeroc

[SoiBiker]

Ironically it is now the case that so many Western men (in Western countries) are the subservient ones. Many even pretend to be 'feminist', probably the only way they can 'sow their oats'

Or maybe we're not pretending - but the world has moved on, and your views make you seem like a dinosaur?

[ggt]

Call me old-fashioned...but the pic of the Thai lady...really turns me off...she has disfigured her face with unattractive metal posts...her body is likely painted with a colorful dragon...names of ex-boyfriends...and quotes from Buddha...why screw-up a perfectly formed creature...with metal protrusions and ink?

The unblemished golden brown bodies and attractive faces of pristine Thai women...will forever hold a place of high esteem in my heart...

[BritManToo]

Call me old-fashioned...but the pic of the Thai lady...really turns me off...she has disfigured her face with unattractive metal posts...her body is likely painted with a colorful dragon...names of ex-boyfriends...and quotes from Buddha...why screw-up a perfectly formed creature...with metal protrusions and ink?

I'll try anything once, adventurous, me!

[rogeroc]

Or maybe we're not pretending - but the world has moved on, and your views make you seem like a dinosaur?

You are probably correct, my son has just finished 3 years of Uni in the UK and apparently being a male feminist is almost obligatory.

[swissie]

I consider myself as a subservient Farang. I pay for everything while smiling at the lady. It's the smile of a crocodile, Once the crocodile (me) has devoured it's pray and the Lady starts to talk about "country living and free family land to build a house on", not forgetting to casually mention that she has only 2 1/2 children from a previous marriage, is the time the crocodile (me) is starting to look for new pray.

I have nothing against Farangs, that claim "my wife is different". It's just that they may well be stuck in the middle of a "Learning-Curve" that has not reached completion yet.

My "learning-curve" goes back to 1996.

Cheers.

[HerbalEd]

Obviously there are many exceptions to a stereotype, but stereotypically speaking:

Many Thai women ... esp. bar girls ... may appear subservient, but actually they're masters at using their beauty, sexuality and what-appears-to-be-subservientness to their best advantage.

After very many Thai girlfriends over 25 years, I finally met a Thai woman who I realized I wanted to be with for the rest of my life ... so I married her. It's been 3.5 years now and we very seldom have harsh words. Instead there's lots of laughter every day, lots of cuddling, and mutual respect. The relationship is rather old-world in that she's very good at making me think I'm the boss.

Actually, I'm happy to give her what she wants ... most of the time ... and, indeed, I do so often, because she isn't greedy and doesn't nag me about it. Because of this, I actually cater to her much much more than I ever did with my previous girlfriends (farang & Thai) and ex-wife (farang).

However, once in a rare while I have to put my foot down and say "no" you can't do that, or buy that, or whatever. I say it firmly but respectfully and hold my position. When I do this, she's learned not to push it too far, and sooner-than-later she concedes ... and there's no price to be paid later with her sulking or bringing it back up again. However, whenever I do this, I make sure to soon do something special for her ... something she hasn't asked for and doesn't expect.

I think most Thai women want a strong man who's man-of-the-house. However, many men don't know how to do this gracefully without making the lady lose face. I've learned that if I want to be treated like a king, I have to treat my wife like a queen. Plus it actually makes me very happy making her ... and her family ... happy.

[BritManToo]

Or maybe we're not pretending - but the world has moved on, and your views make you seem like a dinosaur?

You are probably correct, my son has just finished 3 years of Uni in the UK and apparently being a male feminist is almost obligatory.

For heterosexuals.

[BritManToo]

I consider myself as a subservient Farang. I pay for everything while smiling at the lady. It's the smile of a crocodile, Once the crocodile (me) has devoured it's pray and the Lady starts to talk about "country living and free family land to build a house on", not forgetting to casually mention that she has only 2 1/2 children from a previous marriage, is the time the crocodile (me) is starting to look for new pray.

That's 'prey' swissie, 'pray' is for monks and missionaries.

Edited April 17, 2016 by BritManToo

[StreetCowboy]

I have had 3 thai girlfriend's. The first one we had a mutual understanding of each other and had some great times no bad days. The 2nd was fully subservient and I couldn't handle it. The 3rd was subservient to a degree wanting me to be happy but at the same time she was very stubborn, she is the only one wanting money. So from that I say everyone is different.

Based on your sample of three you suddenly come to the conclusion that everyone's different? Talk about sweeping generalisations!

[HerbalEd]

I consider myself as a subservient Farang. I pay for everything while smiling at the lady. It's the smile of a crocodile, Once the crocodile (me) has devoured it's pray and the Lady starts to talk about "country living and free family land to build a house on", not forgetting to casually mention that she has only 2 1/2 children from a previous marriage, is the time the crocodile (me) is starting to look for new pray.

I have nothing against Farangs, that claim "my wife is different". It's just that they may well be stuck in the middle of a "Learning-Curve" that has not reached completion yet.

My "learning-curve" goes back to 1996.

Cheers.

Slow learner, huh.

[chrisinth]

Let me tell you about subservient.

I do what I want when she wants.

Everyone happy, some more than most.............

Subservient Thai women.............

Edited April 17, 2016 by chrisinth

[rogeroc]

A feminist is simply someone who believes women and men should have equal rights.

Really, that sounds so early 20th Century. I thought it was about non existent 'rape culture', non existent 'pay gaps', man spreading (i guess that exists), positive discrimination for women in certain jobs, privilege and power to women and subservience of men. Or of course it can be anything else that a supporter decides they want it to be. Just look at all those 'what does it mean to me' banners feminists parade.

Edited April 17, 2016 by rogeroc

[williamgeorgeallen]

i moved to thailand 9 years ago after a few western relationships. i knew having kids with a western woman was not going to work for me. raising kids is the most important thing in the world and not something i was ever going to excel at. i have 2 kids with a thai woman. i doubt i could ever find a western woman who would devote her life to our kids like she has. on the flip side a thai woman will ruin your life if you let her, no different from the rest of the woman i suppose.

[CharlieH]

Off topic bickering removed.

[MyFriend You]

I have only known three subservient Thai wives since coming here the first time in 1969 - and all three were married to Germans who owned bar/restaurants in Pattaya..............sorry, nothing against Germans as a whole, just knew these three that ordered their wives around like slaves, ridiculed them in public, and never appeared happy with their wives..........me thinks they just married them to go into business mi dos centavos

[mydee]

In the case of Thais it may be that Thai women were thought to be "the back legs of the elephant" at least that was what a guide book on Thailand I read postulated. That hasn't been my experience although the Thai ideal of feminity seems to be quiet dignity and knowledge of cooking and modesty in dress which some may see as subservient

I have dated Filipina, Vietnamese and Thai ladies both in the UK and overseas, i have not found any of them to be subservient and what a good thing that is.

I wonder where the suggestion of subservience in women from certain Nationalities came from. My guess is Western women (or movements allegedly fighting their cause) wrongly labelling (women who still knows how to cook, women who wants to please their partner and women who accept that men and women are genetically different) as being subservient.

[elgenon]

Many Western women are of the opinion that if you want to be in Thailand it's because the women are subservient. In my experience the Thai women still get their way but do it in a non-confrontational way. I am talking about middle class not bar girls.

[alski333]

Thanks for your insight. Are there many cows on the street.

[Goanna]

My wife is ha sip ha sip. When we walk somewhere in the cities, she walks beside me. In the village, she walks behind, because thats the custom. However, when we go to Cambodia, she will walk in front.....in case there are land munes. But I love her, so we take the kids now, so they go in front of her.

[Goanna]

Mines.

[BritManToo]

Many Western women are of the opinion that if you want to be in Thailand it's because the women are subservient. In my experience the Thai women still get their way but do it in a non-confrontational way. I am talking about middle class not bar girls.

My last Thai gf (but one) used to punch me in the face or threaten me with a machete when she didn't get her way.

She had a degree from CMU, is that middle-class, non-confrontational and subservient enough?

Had her own house too, I lived in it with her for a while!

Edited April 18, 2016 by BritManToo