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Dodgy Thai Fortune Tellers

Brewster67

By Brewster67
in ASEAN NOW Community Pub

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Brewster67 Advanced Member

Brewster67

Posted
Posted

The wife's family are obsessed with fortune tellers, they really think they have some sort of power to see a person's future, which is OK I guess if it is a bit of harmless entertainment, but this morning it went a bit too far for my liking.

 

Up to now I just would nob my head and smile at their silly prophesies and say stuff like "Oh wow, that's good" or "I see... let's hope she is right".... Usually they are wrong on most stuff, and once or twice they hit the mark which is expected now and then they will get a fluke, it is the law of averages at play rather than successful sooth saying.

 

Anyway, this morning the wife and her family went to see one in Pak Chong, the mother in law went first while my wife sat at the side of the room opting out of a reading. Here mum asked the old crone that was in session "will my daughter get pregnant?"... The crone replied NO... She said it was because her husband already had kids to another and he has had his limit.... Lol  She already knows about this because my wife has asked things similar before and chatted to the crone about he farang husband, and obviously the wizened old trout put  2 and 2 together.

 

Here is the thing that did it for me and I had to speak out in the end... Wifey's dad then went over for as reading, she just came straight out with it... "You are going to die very shortly... You MUST go and be a monk for 3 days immediately"... The father in law is in peak condition for his age (63) apart from a dodgy knee. He is a non-drinker and smoker and he exercises daily... The guy is 15 years my senior but can run rings around me... But anyway, he is now totally convinced he is going to die and is stopping in at the temple on the way home to make arrangements for joining the monkhood as instructed.

 

I am not sure if this monking is supposed to save his life or sort of help cleanse his soul as he heads for the big sleep, but I think I have upset the family for railing on about how ridiculous this person is. It is one thing to make a few bucks out of managing to bull>shit the gullible, and trust me, there are millions available for them to swindle, but to take their money and then scare the crap out of them is just about stepping over the mark.

 

Her dad is a very intelligent man,  he was vice president at his school of over 5000 girls, so he is no dumb farm hand would I would assume would be more likely to believe this mumbo jumbo <deleted>...   When we had out wai house blessed, the trout conducting that asked if anyone wanted their fortune told, her dad went over and asked if he was going to win the lottery (I know...lol).... She replied you are already rich, give me another 2000 and I will wai for you and you will win, he pulled his wallet out in a flash and handed the money straight over without flinching, 4 years o we are still waiting.

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Brewster67 Advanced Member

Brewster67

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31 minutes ago, Kwasaki said:

Well never mind don't know how long you have been here but you'll manage if you want to.

" Her dad is a very intelligent man "'  :lol:

Sorry, I meant academically.... lol

 

I believe it is living your entire life in an ultra-superstitious culture is actually to blame for him believing this cack.

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fishbrando Senior Member

fishbrando

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8 hours ago, Brewster67 said:

When we had out wai house blessed, the trout conducting that asked if anyone wanted their fortune told, her dad went over and asked if he was going to win the lottery (I know...lol).... She replied you are already rich, give me another 2000 and I will wai for you and you will win, he pulled his wallet out in a flash and handed the money straight over without flinching, 4 years o we are still waiting.

 

Now I have a better understanding of how so many monks end up with luxury car collections.

 

Sam Harris said it best: “If someone doesn't value evidence, what evidence are you going to provide to prove that they should value it? If someone doesn’t value logic, what logical argument could you provide to show the importance of logic?”

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Kwasaki Star Member

Kwasaki

Posted
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7 hours ago, Brewster67 said:

Sorry, I meant academically.... lol

 

I believe it is living your entire life in an ultra-superstitious culture is actually to blame for him believing this cack.

 

Yeah only pulling ya leg,  and your right it seems most Thais are brought up with it,  my wife gets her lottery numbers from one of em. :D

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monkey4u Silver Member

monkey4u

Posted
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A number of years ago there was a fortune teller working in a door way at night in Kings Cross in Sydney

As she was telling some guy his future a fight broke out across the road

A gun was pulled and YEP  the poor guy having his fortune got shot

So much for the powers of some  :whistling:

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Peterw42 Platinum Member

Peterw42

Posted
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I am predicting a long and popular thread, some humorous observations, some Thai bashing, some sharing of personal experience.

 

2,000 Baht thanks

 

(lottery numbers, additional fee)

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bark Senior Member

bark

Posted
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My Girl friend told me she was going to go to the local fortune teller. The day before, I asked my staff to write a letter

for me in Thai. Told them to write...

" Please tell my girl friend, that she spends too much money ( waste) on clothes , restaurants, family. Said if not stop

her Boy friend would kick her out. " I paid 2,000 baht, after giving the note  to the lady.

Since then, my expenses for wife have dropped by 5,000/ month. I love these Fortune tellers.

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colinneil Platinum Member

colinneil

Posted
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My wife loves these fortune tellers, if it is a monk so much  the better.

Just before my accident a monk told my wife, your husband will run away with another woman.

They will have many children. Wife came home i was interrogated about where i had been, what had i been doing, who was i speaking with. 

3 days later i had my accident , now i cannot walk, let alone run off with anybody.

We still laugh about what the monk told her, i gave him 500 baht and he lie she says. :cheesy:

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oldlakey Explorer Member

oldlakey

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1 hour ago, thai3 said:

Some of them are great, especially the monks doing it. Two told my mrs the same thing- that she talks too much and that she talks silly and gets hot hearted too much. Spot on, never been to see one since :rolleyes:

All national traits exercised daily by many

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oldlakey Explorer Member

oldlakey

Posted
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15 minutes ago, bark said:

My Girl friend told me she was going to go to the local fortune teller. The day before, I asked my staff to write a letter

for me in Thai. Told them to write...

" Please tell my girl friend, that she spends too much money ( waste) on clothes , restaurants, family. Said if not stop

her Boy friend would kick her out. " I paid 2,000 baht, after giving the note  to the lady.

Since then, my expenses for wife have dropped by 5,000/ month. I love these Fortune tellers.

Cant possibly argue with that

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Peterw42 Platinum Member

Peterw42

Posted
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20 minutes ago, bark said:

My Girl friend told me she was going to go to the local fortune teller. The day before, I asked my staff to write a letter

for me in Thai. Told them to write...

" Please tell my girl friend, that she spends too much money ( waste) on clothes , restaurants, family. Said if not stop

her Boy friend would kick her out. " I paid 2,000 baht, after giving the note  to the lady.

Since then, my expenses for wife have dropped by 5,000/ month. I love these Fortune tellers.

 

You have the gift, you were able to predict and change the future.

Do you do private readings, lottery numbers ?

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oxo1947 Platinum Member

oxo1947

Posted
Posted

It was lucky that I went to see a fortune teller today.
She warned me that somebody was going to swindle me.

I was more than happy to pay for that kind of information. .....................................:coffee1:

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oxo1947 Platinum Member

oxo1947

Posted
Posted (edited)

We do tend to laugh a lot at the Thais peculiarities, however every Newspaper I have read---even the ones that class themselves as highbrow, run a column on what fate the stars have  in line for you each day. And many TV programs devote time to it, & they are even more random as they take the whole worlds population & just divide it by 12.

 

I had a Kiwi girlfriend once that was right into this---brought books on it, went to meetings, etc  told me it was a science . One day she told me that I had to be very careful while either crossing the road----or riding my motor bike (strong indications from the stars) I pointed out to her that I had the same star & birth-date as the Yorkshire ripper who a few years before had received 15 life prison sentences.....I asked her do you feel he will be in any danger on his motor bike today, or should we tell him  to look both ways before crossing a busy road.

 

Anyway we broke up shortly after---apparently my Saturn wasn't aligned with something, (probably--her Uranus) 

 

Guess I have something to thank the stars for.................:coffee1:

Edited by oxo1947
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Khon Kaen Dave Explorer Member

Khon Kaen Dave

Posted
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My wife went with her mother to a fortune teller who lives about 1 kilometre away.she does all the readings at her home.She is quite the professional and has even had cards printed so people dont forget her phone number in case they want an impromptu reading. Her tellings have had the obvious law of averages success.On her cards is printed,"Miss Dow,i see all" here in Isaan such ladies are called pooyiing morn dumb.My wife kept on at me to go and see her,i eventually relented and said i would go.Upon arrival at her home,there was a note pinned to her door.My wife read it and roughly translated it said "closed due to unfor seen circumstances!"

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BlindMagician Explorer Member

BlindMagician

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2 hours ago, Kwasaki said:

 

I don't bother saying anything because my wife has won lottery not big but 3 times using there numbers. :) 

 

Oh, the ignorant do make fools of themselves.

 

It's your ignorance that they feed off.

 

Here's a few things to consider, have a dispassionate think if you can...

 

How many times would she have won, without their input?

Play enough times, and odds are you will win sometime, not big, but win nonetheless.

For your one good luck story, how many duds are there?

I once saw two identical cars driving next to each other, with their number plates differing by one digit...wow...must have been a sign! Noooo...it will happen, one time in a large number, and for that one near guaranteed time, it might seem like something special to the accidental observer, but it's not, is it. Think about all the times people do not see this scenario...nobody makes a mental note of non-events.

 

It's all about something called probability, and the foolish human emotional brain that does not see through the mystic fog of hoping to be someone special.

 

Sorry to dissappoint.

 

If you can truly get your brain around the relevant maths, you'll see how foolish all this mystic nonsense is.....☺

Edited by BlindMagician
Auto checker goes too far
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fishbrando Senior Member

fishbrando

Posted
Posted (edited)
7 minutes ago, Global Guy said:

If it hasn't been asked already.....are there any fortune tellers who AREN'T dodgy? I mean, by the very nature of the definition of the words in the sentence?

Good point.  To borrow from Jimmy Carr:

 

"Well that was a fake fortune teller."

 

"As opposed to...?"

Edited by fishbrando
Jimmy Carr, not Steve Carr
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