How to divorce if your wife won't let you?

[JerryinTH]

This might sound odd but how can you divorce your wife if she doesn't agree to it? 

 

We live in the same condo, which is in my name. If I understand this correct, even if I'd call the cops and ask them to escort her out she would have every legal right to stay there as we are legally married correct? 

 

Can I just got to file for divorce by myself or how do I get rid of her? I am afraid she runs up some kind of debts or anything like that and I will get stung for it in the end because she didn't sign the paper. 

 

Any advice? 

[swissie]

As long as you stay under the same roof with her, you are married with her.

- Move out and get your own place.

- After that, get lawyer to file for divorce proceedings with the stipulation, that you are no more responsible for the spending habits of wife. As per "immediately".

A good lawyer will know how to nail it. (Date wise).

Be quick about it !  After that, the rest will unfold according to court proceedings.

To be sure: Unless wife agrees to an uncontested divorce, the divorce will cost you more than the "marriage-fee" at the Amphoe. Wish you luck.

Cheers.

[blackcab]

If it's your property, what you say goes. If you are smart you will sell the condo before you get divorced.

 

Your only option is to separate and live apart for 3 years. At that point you can apply to the Court for a divorce and they're is nothing she can do to stop you.

 

But you have to make the first move.

[thaibeachlovers]

^^ So how do you prove that you seperated at a certain date when there is no equivalent of a separation agreement in LOS?

My wife wants to get divorced, but doesn't want to take the time off work to do so, and I'm concerned I don't have all the right bits of paper, which could be catastrophic, even if she does manage to get to the office with me. Also, I am running out of time, as I have no desire to hang around indefinitely waiting for her to pull finger.

The other problem is that now I'm going to be by myself, I won't be able to live in Thailand anyway. I'm not a youngster anymore. So after 3 years, I won't be travelling to LOS just to go to court.

I have no intention of ever getting married again, but she might want to.

[Minnehaha]

 

On 9/17/2016 at 0:31 AM, swissie said:

As long as you stay under the same roof with her, you are married with her.

- Move out and get your own place.

- After that, get lawyer to file for divorce proceedings with the stipulation, that you are no more responsible for the spending habits of wife. As per "immediately".

A good lawyer will know how to nail it. (Date wise).

Be quick about it !  After that, the rest will unfold according to court proceedings.

To be sure: Unless wife agrees to an uncontested divorce, the divorce will cost you more than the "marriage-fee" at the Amphoe. Wish you luck.

Cheers.

 

Exactly. If her name is not on it ... move out with her. Then sell it. Then separate from her and start the divorce proceedings quickly. And get a good lawyer, which may be the trickiest part of the whole thing. PM me if you need one. I know one who is good with family law / divorce. 

[thaibeachlovers]

^^ Any idea of what a simple divorce using a good lawyer would cost?

[williamgeorgeallen]

24 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

^^ Any idea of what a simple divorce using a good lawyer would cost?

as with many problems money can solve most of them. if you can come to an agreement with your wife it is by far the easiest option. offer your wife a payout to get divorced and make sure your assets are listed in your agreement. you dont need to sell your condo unless you need the proceeds to pay her out. make sure you dont pay out until the divorce is final of course.

[Kabula]

Renting everything gives one, especially seniors piece of mind.

[NickJ]

A simple divorce is what the certificate costs. Also a witness fee if you don't bring two of your own.

After three years it doesn't matter. After three years the one who left can get divorced.  After just one year I believe the person who remained has the option based on abandonment.  

If your leaving. Get everything settled. Then three days or so before you leave call her up and and say she better meet you at the amphur. 

[phantomfiddler]

I,m with Blackcab, and I have considerable experience in this field. Don,t worry about your future residence in Thailand as being married to a Thai really does not give you much in the way of benefits. Sell the condo and move to a cheap boarding house, hire a lawyer to do the whole transaction, and just put it down to experience. My last one was expecting several million but accepted 500 Bht after the alternative was explained to her. As the Nike ad says, JUST DO IT !

[catman20]

1 hour ago, thaibeachlovers said:

^^ Any idea of what a simple divorce using a good lawyer would cost?

the cost dose not matter if you get your life back, stay single next time things dont always end up the way they start off.

[Nemesis7]

Sell the condo fast, or transfer it to your relatives names from Land registry office ASAP. Then move out. Empty your bank account. Hire a lawyer and seat back and see where it leads you.

[bark]

2 hours ago, williamgeorgeallen said:

as with many problems money can solve most of them. if you can come to an agreement with your wife it is by far the easiest option. offer your wife a payout to get divorced and make sure your assets are listed in your agreement. you dont need to sell your condo unless you need the proceeds to pay her out. make sure you dont pay out until the divorce is final of course.

Yep, this makes sense. 

Or stop paying all utilities, electric, water, cable , internet.

[williamgeorgeallen]

1 minute ago, bark said:

Yep, this makes sense. 

Or stop paying all utilities, electric, water, cable , internet.

that may make her move out but it does not solve the long term problem.  this guy needs to make a clean break. i dont understand why any western man would marry a thai woman. when a man marries in thailand he is giving away his rights. you want to try to have a relationship with a thai woman ok, try but dont leave yourself open to getting rolled.

[williamgeorgeallen]

2 hours ago, catman20 said:

the cost dose not matter if you get your life back, stay single next time things dont always end up the way they start off.

you know why divorce is so expensive? because its worth it. cheaper to not get married in the first place.

[Doc46]

Leave the country and cut your losses.

[SOTIRIOS]

...it would be idiotic to move out...

 

...if you bought the condo before marriage...she has zero claim on it...unless she manages to change the papers...

 

...sadly even hiring the best lawyer means nothing...

 

***

...so as to how to proceed...good question..

 

...file for divorce...

 

...print a disclaimer in the newspaper...???

 

...make sure she doesn't have copies of your passport...or has already forged your signature....

 

...***....I know someone this happened to....and it doesn't seem that justice will be served anyway...

 

...so go figure....

 

...good luck....

 

...and watch out she doesn't send someone after you....

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Slip]

Does she know you want to divorce her, but doesn't agree to it?  If so, the game is already afoot.  As others have advised- don't hang about. (Meaning don't waste time).

Edited September 19, 2016 by Slip
clarification.

[blackcab]

4 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

^^ Any idea of what a simple divorce using a good lawyer would cost?

 

A rental contract in your name only would be a good start.

[White Christmas13]

So while we talking about separation ( I know it might be different in Thailand )

In Australia you can live in the same house with your wife (%^%%$#@) for a number

of months ( it is called separated under one roof ) that is what happen to me now .

Problem is, I cant find a place for my self suitable and affordable so what do I do ?

 

[blackcab]

2 hours ago, White Christmas13 said:

So while we talking about separation ( I know it might be different in Thailand )

In Australia you can live in the same house with your wife (%^%%$#@) for a number

of months ( it is called separated under one roof ) that is what happen to me now .

Problem is, I cant find a place for my self suitable and affordable so what do I do ?

 

 

Move your girlfriend in.

[Krataiboy]

On 17/09/2016 at 10:13 PM, blackcab said:

If it's your property, what you say goes. If you are smart you will sell the condo before you get divorced.

 

Your only option is to separate and live apart for 3 years. At that point you can apply to the Court for a divorce and they're is nothing she can do to stop you.

 

But you have to make the first move.

 

 

You can sell the condo, but upon divorce your wife will be able to claim half the proceeds - and indeed, half of everything else (money as well as assets) acquired during the marriage. 

 

A separation (I think it has gone down to two years now; you need to check) is not the only way to divorce someone in Thailand, as here the concept of a "guilty party" still appertains. You can sue for adultery, cruelty and a number of other reasons. Again, you need to check, either with a lawyer or on one of the many legal websites available. 

 

A contested divorce can be extremely costly and drawn out. If possible, seek to reach an amicable agreement with you wife which will give her a share of the marital assets in return for a quickie divorce by mutual consent at the local amphur. This will cost, if my memory serves me correctly, only 20 baht.

 

Good luck.

[blackcab]

37 minutes ago, Krataiboy said:

 

You can sell the condo, but upon divorce your wife will be able to claim half the proceeds - and indeed, half of everything else (money as well as assets) acquired during the marriage. 

 

I agree 99 per cent with you. The difference is that I would say:

 

You can sell the condo, but upon divorce your wife will be able to claim half the proceeds that are left.

[AsianExport]

On 9/17/2016 at 0:31 AM, swissie said:

As long as you stay under the same roof with her, you are married with her.

- Move out and get your own place.

- After that, get lawyer to file for divorce proceedings with the stipulation, that you are no more responsible for the spending habits of wife. As per "immediately".

A good lawyer will know how to nail it. (Date wise).

Be quick about it !  After that, the rest will unfold according to court proceedings.

To be sure: Unless wife agrees to an uncontested divorce, the divorce will cost you more than the "marriage-fee" at the Amphoe. Wish you luck.

Cheers.

 

Hello,

 

Do you think that it's possible to secure the situation to avoid debts and then not divorce ?

I think divorcing is useless as she will still be useful to get a visa.

 

Thank you.

 

 

 

Edited September 19, 2016 by AsianExport

[dontoearth]

    A lot of the advice here on good old TVF from ex-pats is based on LAWS in the country of the home poster.  Forget about all of this advice.  Find a good Thai attorney and be prepared to pay!  A divorce of a Thai in Thailand is going to be based on Thai law!  People quoting community property divorce laws in New Jersey are not helping you!

     I don't know of any farung that has got off scott free!  You can stop thinking about that!  On the other hand if she thinks you are going to bail and try to screw her she can run up endless bills you are responsible for and have to pay.   There are thai loan sharks who specialize in helping the wife run up lot of cash loans and split the difference with the wife.  There is a good story of a brit who lost a house and land that was covered in great depth here on TVF a few years ago.  He seemed to be clueless about thai marriage laws regarding property and wanted his embassy to help him.  He should have held his breathe!    You can look that up.  The stupid bloke remarried another thai woman and had even more kids.  He seemed to be a case for Darwin sterilization.

    All the ex-pats I know either paid big cash settlements or gave up property or both when they divorced here in Thailand.  

    Seek the advice of an expert Thai attorney!  Forget about the TVF experts!  They often confuse british law and swedish law and usa law for something they could easily do in Thailand.  It just ain't so!  Just to make you aware of this here is how it is done in Chicago.

    In my home country the USA divorce is controlled by local laws and in my locality you can actual divorce a person by claiming you have lost touch with them for 3 months.   You just move off and stop speaking.  All you have to do to show you tried to find them is put an ad in the local newspapers circulating in the area of your last residence where you lived together. How many younger people read a newspaper classifieds or even know what they are actually? If they don't answer that is their problem.  You then pay a simple $300 for a filing fee.  This allows a lot of people that have made a split to get away with keeping stuff!    The spouse doesn't know what hit them!  LOL.  ROFL.

    You are not going to be so lucky.  On the other hand the longer u seek BAD advice the worse your situation will become.  If you have made your decision to divorce get in there and see a Thai attorney TODAY!

[timendres]

First, contrary to the previous post, I was able to divorce my Thai wife with ZERO payout. But it took almost one year, and during that time, she calmed down and became reasonable. I would not count on that in your case.

 

Second, in Thailand, infidelity is grounds for divorce, which has yet to be mentioned. Something to consider.

 

As others have stated, you can expect to payout. You might just want to spend the time, under calm circumstances, to explain that an agreed upon, reasonable settlement, and quick divorce will make both of your lives easier, and ask that she agree. Make an offer that you can live with that will look attractive to her, and hope for the best.

 

Otherwise, life is not going to be fun for the next year or so...

[thaibeachlovers]

12 hours ago, AsianExport said:

 

Hello,

 

Do you think that it's possible to secure the situation to avoid debts and then not divorce ?

I think divorcing is useless as she will still be useful to get a visa.

 

Thank you.

 

 

 

Get a pre nup.

[thaibeachlovers]

3 hours ago, dontoearth said:

 

     I don't know of any farung that has got off scott free! 

    All the ex-pats I know either paid big cash settlements or gave up property or both when they divorced here in Thailand.

  

   I don't know of any farung that has got off scott free!

 

I did. Other than what I gave her during the marriage, I lost nothing except time. She even paid the few baht it cost for the legal divorce at the amphur.

Helps if you keep your mouth shut when it goes bad and don't burn the bridges.

 

 

[happylarry]

People keep referring to making settlements before going to the court for a divorce, this is a great idea of course but completely unnecessary as the court system goes like this:-

 

1. Paper submitted to court by one party, and date for first hearing.

2. First hearing which comprises of sitting before a judge, the lawyers and both parties and holding a "negotiation meeting." This is to try and come to an amicable decision on the distribution of assets and / or custody of children etc. If this negotiation hearing is successful then they have to wait for thirty days and then the court issues a paper to be taken to the amphur to divorce.

3. If the negotiation hearing was unsuccessful then it goes to the main court hearing before a different judge and evidence will be heard and so forth and whatever the judge decides will have to be accepted.

 

So you see it is better to have your negotiation meeting at the court because you have the judge to mediate between the two parties and not let the meeting get out of hand into a shouting match where nothing gets done.

I hope this information is of use to someone.

HL 

 

[GarryP]

14 hours ago, blackcab said:

 

I agree 99 per cent with you. The difference is that I would say:

 

You can sell the condo, but upon divorce your wife will be able to claim half the proceeds that are left.

Not if he can prove the condo was purchased before marriage, in which case it is classified as "sin suan tua" personal property, not "sin somros" marriage property, or property gained while married.