Why can my facebook friends see comments I make on other friends profiles?

[cyberfarang]

I have several friends on my facebook friends lists, many of them unconnected and not facebook friends with each other.

 

Yet a couple of times when I have made a comment on one friend`s profile, another one of my friends not connected with that friend has made a comment responding to my comment on the same wall.. This means that all my facebook friends or should I say; fakebook friends, are seeing all my activities on facebook with whoever I communicate with on there.

 

Anyone know what`s happening and how I can keep my comments to friends private from my other fakebook friends?

 

 

[JaiMaai]

Comments you make on other people's profiles or posts are controlled by their privacy settings. I don't believe there's much you can do.

Sent from my SM-J200GU using Tapatalk

[RichCor]

You'd probably get better responses by posting in the actual Facebook provided Help Community forum.

 

Short answer: JaiMaai is correct, it's controlled by their privacy settings.  Lots of complaints about this.

 

Facebook Help Community Forum:

How do I limit who can see my comments on other people's posts?

How can I limit who sees my comments on other Friends' feeds?

etc, etc, etc...

 

Short answer: Ah, Hahahahahaha!

[cyberfarang]

Seems there are no ways around this.

 

Wow, this is dangerous, everything you say and do on there can be taken down as evidence and used against you. It`s like chatting with certain family and friends in your living room and all your other family and friends can watch and listen in to what you are saying.

 

In future I shall limit my comments on there and be very careful what I say and do on facebook. It can be deadly.

[WorriedNoodle]

11 hours ago, cyberfarang said:

Seems there are no ways around this.

I thought the Thais figured this out ages ago when they switched to that gawd awful Line app?

 

FB is more tailored for those with NPD.  I still use email!

[faraday]

1 minute ago, WorriedNoodle said:

I thought the Thais figured this out ages ago when they switched to that gawd awful Line app?

 

FB is more tailored for those with NPD.  I still use email!

Why do think Line is 'gawd awful'?

[Kerryd]

It can be very frustrating, especially if you have friends with opposing viewpoints on a subject (like politics or religion) and no matter what you post, someone is likely to be offended.

 

I tell people how to limit what they see of my posts, but I can't force them to use that option.

It's not just limited to things you post either. If we are "friends" on Facebook and I click "like" on a page or post, or "share" it with someone else, it could show up in your feed as well "kerryd liked this page" of "kerryd shared this post".

So if I see something that may be somewhat "raunchy" and "share" it with someone I know will like it, or "like" a page that may be "politically incorrect", you still get to see what I've done whether you like it or not (until eventually you elect to "Hide all from kerryd") !

 

It also applies to "tagging". If I "tag" someone in a pic (or post) then all that person's friends (and mine) can see that "kerryd tagged sexmonster2000 in a post (or picture)". I have friends that like to tag people like that and then every time one of their friends comments on that post/pic, I get notified about it (until I remove the tag or select "Turn off notifications for this post"). 

(Sometimes I like to "tag" the girlfriend in a pic I've taken and then wait and see how many of her friends respond to it. I can't seen her "friend" list but I can see all the "friends" that "like" the pic !)
 

It can lead to a lot of unsolicited "friend" requests as well.

Frankly, I'm sure Facebook does it to generate more traffic. They probably justify it by claiming that they are just trying to help your friends see the things you like (or dislike) but the reality is the more traffic they generate, the more money they make.

After all, if you have 1,800 "friends" and only 1% click on a post you made or a link you liked or shared, that's 18 people. Sure beats the one or 2 you really only wanted to see that post/like/share.

[WorriedNoodle]

5 minutes ago, faraday said:

Why do think Line is 'gawd awful'?

Briefly (as I don't want to hijack a FB bashing thread!), the free Line app appears (I'm not expert) to offer more privacy than FB but when users try to use one of its most useful features being the Line Timeline function among a group of friends the Timeline message board is swamped with useless adverts and Line News posts of no interest to anyone that makes it hard to find posts from people you know. Other than that its passable. Wife uses it all time to privately message and vid call me.

[bandito]

12 hours ago, cyberfarang said:

Seems there are no ways around this.

 

Wow, this is dangerous, everything you say and do on there can be taken down as evidence and used against you. It`s like chatting with certain family and friends in your living room and all your other family and friends can watch and listen in to what you are saying.

 

In future I shall limit my comments on there and be very careful what I say and do on facebook. It can be deadly.

 

I never use Facebook and never did.

My son did use it for a short time and no more.

Using Facebook you ask for it.

I communicate with friends and family in other ways, like a phone or SMS.

Old style but more secure.

[A. BOOZER]

Admittedly I am an 'old fart', but I still cannot understand why people do not simply e-mail their friends. 

 

It is so easy to create separate posting lists so that individuals with the same interests are in the same group.

 

Maybe I am just too old and set in my ways, but whilst understanding how business' s may want to advertise and  'spread the word' using social media, simply cannot see why individuals need to use these portals!

 

 

 

 

[khunano]

13 hours ago, cyberfarang said:

Seems there are no ways around this.

 

Wow, this is dangerous, everything you say and do on there can be taken down as evidence and used against you. It`s like chatting with certain family and friends in your living room and all your other family and friends can watch and listen in to what you are saying.

 

In future I shall limit my comments on there and be very careful what I say and do on facebook. It can be deadly.

Quit Facebook and be safe!

[Minnehaha]

because we all work for Facebook. 

now, get off TV and get back to work

[kokopelli]

This was posted recently posted on thaivisa. Maybe it is of some help?

 

http://tech.thaivisa.com/heres-lock-facebook-account-protect-privacy/22812/?utm_source=newsletter-20170708-0739&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=news

[LivinLOS]

I struggle to understand, how you dont understand. 

A post can be public, for friends, for groups of friends or private (you wouldnt see it) etc.. If you reply on a post thats public, everyone (the public) can see it.. If you reply on a post for thier friends only, his (not your) friends can see it.. If you reply on a post set to a small group or subset, that group or subset see it. 

 

Whats to understand here ?? simply look at the privacy of a post to know how the privacy of any comments made to it will be controlled. 

[theusedversion]

As someone else said, what your friends can see is controlled by the privacy setting on the post you commented on. So in this situation, your friend posted something and had the privacy setting to "Public" most likely which is signified by the tiny round globe. This means anyone can see their post and once you commented on it, all your friends could see your comment. Had the privacy setting on the post you commented on been set to "Friends" which is usually the case for most posts on Facebook, then no one else on your friend's list would have been able to see your comment. Also, comments made on posts from pages you follow can be seen by all of your friends so tread carefully.

[seancbk]

15 hours ago, cyberfarang said:

Seems there are no ways around this.

 

Wow, this is dangerous, everything you say and do on there can be taken down as evidence and used against you. It`s like chatting with certain family and friends in your living room and all your other family and friends can watch and listen in to what you are saying.

 

In future I shall limit my comments on there and be very careful what I say and do on facebook. It can be deadly.

 

You mention 'fakebook friends'    are you saying you have people you've added as 'friends'  who are not in fact real life friends?  

Why would you do that?

[jko]

Facebook is amazing.

 

Its incredible convenience, power and reach is almost too good to be true.

 

It should however be considered that no person or government organisation in history has ever possessed so much confidential, often intimate, information about the world's population as Mark Zuckerberg and his team does.

The immensity of two billion people voluntarily, often daily, revealing highly confidential aspects of their personal life to Facebook is very difficult to grasp. The same two billion, if approached on the street by someone asking for similar information, would most likely report the person to the police.

 

Most people however seem blissfully unaware of the facts and the risks. Facebook adherents (and addicts) probably seek safety in numbers. If 2,000,000,000 people already use it, and an average of 500,000 sign up every day, then it surely must be OK? They do not ask themselves why  it is required to provide Facebook with so much personal data? They do not consider who will then have access to both that information, and the personal messages received from 'friends'  (and their friends, and their friends...)

 

There is no doubt that Facebook is an astonishingly valuable and powerful tool which history may record as being equal to the invention of the wheel. It now dominates the daily lives of countless people globally, and shows no sign of reducing its influence. Rather the opposite. Mr Zuckerberg has plans to connect everybody in the world to Facebook with satellite technology. His first satellite failed, but there will be more.

 

Connecting everybody globally is a laudable ideal, but it should not be at the expense of revealing your private information, that of your family; everybody they are connected with; who they are connected with, and who they are connected with. That is already happening, and it is still early days. What happens next may be unthinkable.

 

The moral of the story is: If it sounds too good to be true, then it probably is.

 

 

 

 

[cyberfarang]

4 hours ago, Kerryd said:

It can be very frustrating, especially if you have friends with opposing viewpoints on a subject (like politics or religion) and no matter what you post, someone is likely to be offended.

 

I tell people how to limit what they see of my posts, but I can't force them to use that option.

It's not just limited to things you post either. If we are "friends" on Facebook and I click "like" on a page or post, or "share" it with someone else, it could show up in your feed as well "kerryd liked this page" of "kerryd shared this post".

So if I see something that may be somewhat "raunchy" and "share" it with someone I know will like it, or "like" a page that may be "politically incorrect", you still get to see what I've done whether you like it or not (until eventually you elect to "Hide all from kerryd") !

 

It also applies to "tagging". If I "tag" someone in a pic (or post) then all that person's friends (and mine) can see that "kerryd tagged sexmonster2000 in a post (or picture)". I have friends that like to tag people like that and then every time one of their friends comments on that post/pic, I get notified about it (until I remove the tag or select "Turn off notifications for this post"). 

(Sometimes I like to "tag" the girlfriend in a pic I've taken and then wait and see how many of her friends respond to it. I can't seen her "friend" list but I can see all the "friends" that "like" the pic !)
 

It can lead to a lot of unsolicited "friend" requests as well.

Frankly, I'm sure Facebook does it to generate more traffic. They probably justify it by claiming that they are just trying to help your friends see the things you like (or dislike) but the reality is the more traffic they generate, the more money they make.

After all, if you have 1,800 "friends" and only 1% click on a post you made or a link you liked or shared, that's 18 people. Sure beats the one or 2 you really only wanted to see that post/like/share.

This is exactly what happened to me.

 

I made a comment and agreed with a political video a facebook friend had posted, then literally within seconds an elderly cousin, not connected with that friend replied to my comment and then emailing giving me a lecture on the moralities of life. Twice this has happened to me now within the last week.

 

Then I thought what happens if some people make a comment on an escort site or are married and start chatting up other men or women or back certain political parties or beliefs that go against the grain with other people we may know. This also means if getting into any debates with certain parties on your friends lists is going to attract some uninvited participants into the debate.

 

Very dangerous and wonder how many realise exactly how dangerous this is?

Edited July 10, 2017 by cyberfarang

[khunPer]

18 hours ago, cyberfarang said:

Anyone know what`s happening and how I can keep my comments to friends private from my other fakebook friends?

Depending how your the friends, where you are posting, have their privacy settings – now you know why cleaver Thai-ladies have more than one Facebook account...

[impulse]

My question is, how to sign up for a Facebook ID, immediately lock it down as if I don't have the account, then deliberately choose options one at a time, instead of opting out of features after something tragic has already happened.

 

Several co-workers and relatives back home are strongly requesting me to get a Facebook account- which I've been resisting on privacy grounds.  And I won't do it unless I can control who gets to see what, and what my next prospective employer can find by looking me up.  Or my next health insurance company, or...or...

 

[JaiMaai]

One "explanation" is that, say, if I make a post on my timeline, all my friends will be able to see it but only my friends - I rarely make public posts - then a friend makes a comment. A third person then replies to the comment. This third friend is a mutual friend of both me and friend number 2.

The possible situation is that a 4th friend of mine will see my post and the reply to the comment but not the comment because they are not friends with friend number 2. Someone else then replies to one of the comments but I can't see the comment on my OWN post because I'm not their friend.

This could quickly deteriorate into a situation where the thread is unreadable to anyone.

This is not a desirable situation and reaffirms the need to be very careful what you post on the 'Net.

Sent from my SM-P555 using Tapatalk

[seancbk]

OK here is a basic primer on posting to Facebook.

 

When you post you are given the option of who sees the post, the standard options are :-

1. Public - this is anyone on Facebook, whether you know them or not.   Great for promoting your business or putting stuff on your profile to let people who might be trying to find you know that it is indeed you (think old school mates, old colleagues or anyone you may have lot touch with).

2. Friends - Anyone you've added as a friend on Facebook.

3.  Friends except....   - if you choose this you can say which of your friends you don't want to see the post.  

4.  Specific Friends - here you choose exactly which people get to see the post

 

5. Custom - allows you to create custom groups.

For no.5 to work you can also create groups of people, for example I have groups for Hong Kong friends, another for friends in Singapore, another for friends in the UK.   That way if I'm going to Singapore I can let all my Singapore friends know at once.  I have a group for blokes I know in Bangkok, making it easy to arrange nights out without everyone I know seeing what we are upto.

Actually Facebook has very good controls, the problem is people are generally too lazy to figure it out.

The above applies to your posts on your 'Wall'   

However when you post to a group you've joined, that is when you'll start getting random tossers you've never met and probably wouldn't want to commenting on your comments.  

But that is because groups are like this forum, you have no control over who reads your posts in the group (actually you do, if you block people but that is another thing).



 

[mrdome]

5 hours ago, cyberfarang said:

This is exactly what happened to me.

 

I made a comment and agreed with a political video a facebook friend had posted, then literally within seconds an elderly cousin, not connected with that friend replied to my comment and then emailing giving me a lecture on the moralities of life. Twice this has happened to me now within the last week.

 

Then I thought what happens if some people make a comment on an escort site or are married and start chatting up other men or women or back certain political parties or beliefs that go against the grain with other people we may know. This also means if getting into any debates with certain parties on your friends lists is going to attract some uninvited participants into the debate.

 

Very dangerous and wonder how many realise exactly how dangerous this is?

 

There it is - I've always felt that while 'friends' are generally OK on FB, it's your immediate relatives that you should think twice about adding.

[impulse]

1 hour ago, seancbk said:

For no.5 to work you can also create groups of people, for example I have groups for Hong Kong friends, another for friends in Singapore, another for friends in the UK.   That way if I'm going to Singapore I can let all my Singapore friends know at once.  I have a group for blokes I know in Bangkok, making it easy to arrange nights out without everyone I know seeing what we are upto.

 

Pardon a rube question, but if I create a group, can others I have included in that group invite their friends to join, or do I still control who's in the group I've created?

 

[JaiMaai]

That depends on how you set the group up. You can set it so anyone can just join; or existing members can add people; or you can restrict to mods or admins only. When you set the group up you will be the only admin. It's up to you to add more or not.

[MrSnow]

50 minutes ago, impulse said:

2 hours ago, seancbk said:

For no.5 to work you can also create groups of people, for example I have groups for Hong Kong friends, another for friends in Singapore, another for friends in the UK.   That way if I'm going to Singapore I can let all my Singapore friends know at once.  I have a group for blokes I know in Bangkok, making it easy to arrange nights out without everyone I know seeing what we are upto.

 

Pardon a rube question, but if I create a group, can others I have included in that group invite their friends to join, or do I still control who's in the group I've created?

 

These are your own private "groupings" specifically so you can have fine control over who seems what.    The people in the group don't know they are in one, and they don't know what name you've given to it.     So you could have a group called "blokes that like a dirty joke"   and only include friends that appreciate filthy humour.  

Not to be confused with Facebook (interest) groups that people can join.

[NanLaew]

6 hours ago, cyberfarang said:

Very dangerous and wonder how many realise exactly how dangerous this is?

There's a thread on one of the alternative Pattaya forums that was penned several years ago named something like, "Why married guys shouldn't use FaceBook."

[MrSnow]

22 minutes ago, JaiMaai said:

That depends on how you set the group up. You can set it so anyone can just join; or existing members can add people; or you can restrict to mods or admins only. When you set the group up you will be the only admin. It's up to you to add more or not.

 

You are confusing Facebook groups with private contact groups. 
 

[canuckamuck]

I have a Facebook account and it is probably ruining my relationship with everybody, because I don't use it at all anymore. I get hundreds of messages I don't look at which clog up my email, and I have hundreds of friend requests, some from very nice people whom I like a lot. But I don't accept any friend requests because it seems to increase the messages and friend requests by an order of magnitude. And why do I want the whole world to know what I said to Fred, or that I liked an article. It's none of their business.

I wish Facebook was on my side letting me create a custom experience, where likes and comments and messages were mine alone to know about. That would be awesome. Why do people want to have a timeline? You might as well build a glass house.

[richard_smith237]

6 minutes ago, canuckamuck said:

I have a Facebook account and it is probably ruining my relationship with everybody, because I don't use it at all anymore. I get hundreds of messages I don't look at which clog up my email, and I have hundreds of friend requests, some from very nice people whom I like a lot. But I don't accept any friend requests because it seems to increase the messages and friend requests by an order of magnitude. And why do I want the whole world to know what I said to Fred, or that I liked an article. It's none of their business.

I wish Facebook was on my side letting me create a custom experience, where likes and comments and messages were mine alone to know about. That would be awesome. Why do people want to have a timeline? You might as well build a glass house.

 

Likes are your own to know about... up until the point you post them on an Internet site. You have to publicly state that you like something and you are free to keep opinions private in a private message. 

 

I have none of these issues with Facebook - I have had an account for years, no one can search me, no one can see the comments I make. Only friends can see the comments I or friends make on my own page. 

I comment only in private groups regarding meet ups, football games etc

I never comment on religious or political issues on friends sites, mainly because I don't want to get into a public argument. 

 

There are many ways to avoid the issues people have with privacy settings and by avoiding posting. If you feel you must make a comment which you wish to keep private you can send a private message.

 

I am only friends with people I know, whom I would say hi to when passing in the street, its incredible how many that adds up to... they are not friends, but they are acquaintances.

 

The real use for Facebook is to share photos with family and friends, my wife does this and it can be done privately enough.