Marrying a "rich" westerner may not be a "dream come true" - says BBC

[inThailand]

5 minutes ago, steven100 said:

why is mama looking so unhappy ....   ?    is it because he looks 85 ..

Yes! And old falang pee

[Sydebolle]

11 minutes ago, mauGR1 said:

@Sydebolle

This is really too harsh, this is not how most of the people think, although i have seen some of that..

 

It's a black-and-white scenario and I've seen it happen many times. Neither (Thai) wife nor (non-Thai) husband are to blame; it's circumstantial in most cases. Some women are just happy having a hubby, albeit different in many ways, but first and foremost focused on them but in many cases the family keeps the pressure up. And, as the saying goes, blood is thicker than water and how can they say "no" at home? 

[smotherb]

3 hours ago, JLCrab said:

Well then my message to him would be: As for the girlfriend and me, she wants money. I want sex. The rest we work out as necessary ... and I'm more than willing to occasionally pay her family for the privilege of not being married.

Well, I cannot speak for my grandpappy, and he is dead. However, I think if your relationship is built on you giving her money, or her giving you money, it is a monetary relationship. I prefer a reciprocal relationship, where both parties add more to the relationship than their sex.

[smotherb]

9 hours ago, chrisinth said:

If she fires a gun like that the only thing she will win is a hospital bed in 3............2..................1...............

Looks like that may be just a cork gun. I doubt the recoil would send anyone anywhere.

[BEVUP]

6 minutes ago, Sydebolle said:

It's a black-and-white scenario and I've seen it happen many times. Neither (Thai) wife nor (non-Thai) husband are to blame; it's circumstantial in most cases. Some women are just happy having a hubby, albeit different in many ways, but first and foremost focused on them but in many cases the family keeps the pressure up. And, as the saying goes, blood is thicker than water and how can they say "no" at home? 

Yes how true, & it would take a very strong women to say no or a Farang with the purse strings so tight she just can't do

Even Thai families with money would do this as they would at one time or another just need a quick fix for something

[theguyfromanotherforum]

15 minutes ago, catman20 said:

i do hope your joking but in case your not.

 

here we go all TV member's puffing their chest out with all the BS about my ones different she never worked in a bar she loves me and i dont give her any money.

 

Yes.... it's all true.

 

How about YOU are different? Why would my wife be different from all the other middle class Thai women who earn their living getting out of bed and going to work every day?

 

Only a sexpat would say someone's wife is different. Such an utter, disgusting statement from someone who left their brains at the airport probably 30 years ago. How sad for you.

[smotherb]

25 minutes ago, bazza73 said:

Not quite. Thai law only divides the assets 50:50 that are acquired AFTER the marriage. Defacto relationships are not recognised.

In Western society, both marriages and defacto relationships of more than one year result in a division 50:50 of all assets, irrespective of when they were acquired.

Also in many, if not most, Western relationships the wife also works and draws a salary; of course, you could keep your gf/wife working and let her contribute to the relationship.

[smotherb]

26 minutes ago, catman20 said:

i do hope your joking but in case your not.

 

here we go all TV member's puffing their chest out with all the BS about my ones different she never worked in a bar she loves me and i dont give her any money.

Maybe that is part of your problem. You appear to think that all TV posters wives worked in the bars.

[catman20]

2 minutes ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

Yes.... it's all true.

 

How about YOU are different? Why would my wife be different from all the other middle class Thai women who earn their living getting out of bed and going to work every day?

 

Only a sexpat would say someone's wife is different. Such an utter, disgusting statement from someone who left their brains at the airport probably 30 years ago. How sad for you.

sounds like you was not joking  and i hit a nerve. she struck gold with you na she has to work wow, what a lucky lady.

[catman20]

1 minute ago, smotherb said:

Maybe that is part of your problem. You appear to think that all TV posters wives worked in the bars.

i think a lot of them properly did but most moron on here refuse to believe and except it cos their weak and cant handle the truth.

 

personally i dont really think it a problem if your lady worked in a bar. 

[theguyfromanotherforum]

1 minute ago, catman20 said:

sounds like you was not joking  and i hit a nerve. she struck gold with you na she has to work wow, what a lucky lady.

 

Yes, I made her work and go to university and high school. She also started working for an international company as soon as she met me. Her parents had nothing to do with it.

 

At least my teeth are brighter than your future. You are not very smart, are you?

 

 

 

 

[mauGR1]

5 minutes ago, catman20 said:

sounds like you was not joking  and i hit a nerve. she struck gold with you na she has to work wow, what a lucky lady.

What is wrong with working ? Is it something one should be ashamed ? Which planet do you come from ?

 

[LannaGuy]

The 'inconvenient truth' , and this doesn't mean people should not do it, is that young Thais will be willing to marry an older (10/20 or 30 years) western guy because he can offer SECURITY (i.e. financial stability) and he would not be their choice IF she had suitors of the same age bracket who also had that security etc.  Now, it's an 'exchange', and that's no bad thing and people 'can be' happy together with this arrangement which might well grown into love and empathy. But the fact cannot be denied although must western guys in this position I meet are 'in denial'.

 

Who cares? if you are happy then... be happy!  but it is what it is

[catman20]

1 minute ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

Yes, I made her work and go to university and high school. She also started working for an international company as soon as she met me. Her parents had nothing to do with it.

 

At least my teeth are brighter than your future. You are not very smart, are you?

 

 

 

 

wow puff that big chest out, and as for teeth and future i could bet you mine are 100% brighter than yours 

[catman20]

2 minutes ago, mauGR1 said:

What is wrong with working ? Is it something one should be ashamed ? Which planet do you come from ?

 

maybe im just old fashioned if i have a women i like to take care of her enjoy our time together not make her work her fingers to the bone, get some pride mate.

[French mate]

50 minutes ago, Sydebolle said:

 

 

Where did you get this picture of my Thai familly???

[mauGR1]

1 minute ago, catman20 said:

maybe im just old fashioned if i have a women i like to take care of her enjoy our time together not make her work her fingers to the bone, get some pride mate.

well, everybody can take pride in whatever they like.

to have a trophy woman can be something that many people dream, but the reality is that on this planet, most of the people have to work for a living.

so, whatever makes you happy

[cornishcarlos]

6 minutes ago, catman20 said:

maybe im just old fashioned if i have a women i like to take care of her enjoy our time together not make her work her fingers to the bone, get some pride mate.

 

Maybe your wife/gf/bar girl is a proud woman who wants to work and contribute to the partnership... 

How about that ?

 

Old fashioned is not always the best.. Society progresses but some people don't !!

Edited September 21, 2017 by cornishcarlos

[Rimmer]

A flame and counter flame have both been removed

[LannaGuy]

17 minutes ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

What a bunch of crap 

 

Why come to Thailand to take care of women? You could have done this back home. Oh, yes..... the labour here is much cheaper.

 

Pride my ass. More like another hypocrite.

 

Saying someone posts 'a bunch of crap' and is  'another hypocrite'  shows who you are and brings down the whole thread to your level

[smotherb]

24 minutes ago, catman20 said:

i think a lot of them properly did but most moron on here refuse to believe and except it cos their weak and cant handle the truth.

 

personally i dont really think it a problem if your lady worked in a bar. 

It is certainly not anyone else's problem if your lady worked in a bar. However, to conclude that a poster is lying to us or to himself just because he says his lady did not work in a bar seems demeaning. If that is their fantasy, so be it, let them have it. However, if it is true; there is harm. I took two Asian wives back to the US--Vietnamese and Filipina--both were talked about as being bar girls by friends as well as relatives. Neither had worked in the sex-trade, but that was still the uninformed opinion of the masses. Fortunately, both were intelligent and capable and the negative opinions soon changed. The point being; the overwhelming consensus/stereotype of Asian women being whores when with Western men is more disconcerting when it is not true than when it is true.  

[theguyfromanotherforum]

18 minutes ago, LannaGuy said:

 

Saying someone posts 'a bunch of crap' and is  'another hypocrite'  shows who you are and brings down the whole thread to your level

 

No. The thread went to the very bottom when a poster calls your wife "different" just because she has a job and doesn't ask for money. 

 

 

 

 

[binjalin]

Just now, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

No. The thread went to the very bottom when a poster calls your wife "different" just because she has a job and doesn't ask for money. 

 

 

 

 

 

I seem to recall that it was your good-self who was somewhat boastful that your wife pays for you? if you both work and contribute that is another matter entirely but it did not come across that way to this poster at least. Take a step back young man and review how you came across?  your language and descriptions do your posts no favors. 

[Kadilo]

13 hours ago, mettech said:

Thai girl or lady  want to get out of poverty so they are marrying a walking wallet or ATM that all it is. So foreigner enjoy younger beauty for a while and life goes on.

Yeah my ex in U.K. exactly the same......only she wasn't a beauty. 

[SpeakeasyThai]

17 hours ago, al007 said:

Bad guess, 1st from USA 16 yrs

                     2nd UK 14 yrs

                     3rd Russian/Israeli jewish witch from hell Eighteen months too many

Ladyboys never appealed

I can see why the first two marriages failed. Who in their right mind marries a 16 year old, not to mention 14 year old!?

Funny old world.

[moondoggie]

1 hour ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

Yes.... it's all true.

 

How about YOU are different? Why would my wife be different from all the other middle class Thai women who earn their living getting out of bed and going to work every day?

 

Only a sexpat would say someone's wife is different. Such an utter, disgusting statement from someone who left their brains at the airport probably 30 years ago. How sad for you.

My wife worked at a bar. Its very Embarrassing. I could never tell my family back home. Because they would disown me for marrying a prostitute.

[Lingba]

Neither is marrying a poor sexy girl from Thailand

[mauGR1]

18 minutes ago, SpeakeasyThai said:

I can see why the first two marriages failed. Who in their right mind marries a 16 year old, not to mention 14 year old!?

Funny old world.

I think he refers to years of relationship

[2008bangkok]

I guess it also depends on what the westerner wants out of his life. Do they want a life with a  wife who they basically treat like a slave, cook , clean, do all the stuff for them but have absolutely no interest in anything outside of her bubble, no interest in news, current affairs, work, anything outside of Issan life.

Of course the Issan wife is happy and doesnt car she does it for the money and the older the better as that means they will die sooner and Issan wifey becomes financially comfortable with nice house and inheritance.

Or does the westerner want an intelligent women who is seen as equal, can hold a decent conversation, can discuss news and current affairs and who actually give.

 

I dont know any western country where the husband would give the wives parents money every month.

[dapperdan]

Farm girls are good with knives. Be careful