alcoholics - anyone else having problems trying to get semi sober

[wanderluster]

hi all

 

i have been what i call i functioning alcoholic for many yrs now.  i never cause any problems, never drink when sun is up, only drink socially in bars but when home the drinks can add up a lot.

recently and not intentionally i have majorly cut down on my drinking...  specially the whisky,  beer is just like drinking water to me, it is the whisky that causes the problems.

from half to 3/4 litre a day i am now down to 2 -3 ounces.  should sound great.  like i said this was not a mental decion to do but just happened..  now for the problem,,  i can not get past stage 1 sleep, therefor i am having strange ugly dreams/sleeps/nightmares.  not f**king fun at all.  i feel i want to go bck to the alcohol, but i know this is probably the best chance i have ever had of getting over my addiction in over 25 yrs. maybe i have insucrity issues. dont think so but maye be. can critisize me all you want. no problem but if anyone has experienced this kind of thing and can provide me some help it would be be grealty helpful.  please do not tell me to go to some religion... 

 

thanks if can can understand and help

 

 

[FritsSikkink]

Go see a doctor.

[superglue]

The quantity consumed is irrelevant - it is the effect upon you & others.

 

[nikmar]

Im not completely sober but ive gone from binge drinking every night to moderate drinking on a friday and Saturday night.

I experienced similar to you but basically just weathered it, it does get easier. 

2 things that help is a loving wife who turns into a rottweiller if I mess up and actually praying on nights that I couldnt sleep.

Weird as it sounds, Im not particularly a believer/religious man at all but I found it somewhat meditative on bad nights to talk through my problems in my mind in the form of prayer. 

Good luck.

[pgrahmm]

I have a family tree history with alcoholism....Part of the problem is it doesn't really put me under & I can drink a LOT and never have a hangover....

My weakness is a good rum & coke or rum drink....Consequently I don't have it in the house.....

I also don't go where people go to drink - too many other people (usually not the good sort) & associations there with the same problem....

I'm not from a "pub culture" country so don't feel as though I'm missing anything.....

If I decide I want to drink I limit myself to ONE bottle for a month no matter how fast or slow it goes - or whether shared with guests.... Sometimes, if I feel it getting to me too much at one time/binge I'll pour 1/2 - 1/3 (whatever's left) down the drain & take the temptation away....

After reading up on the chemicals contained in Coke Zero I've cut back a good 95% - which probably helps because it was the most common mixer I'd use....

Good luck with your awakening & fight....Get by just one month & it will get easier....

The sleeping concern might have to do with a bar time body clock & addictive body expectations/tendencies....

Maybe substitute some type of exercise or training to tire yourself out might help - change your focus......Break away from your current routine/people/places = they'll suck you right back in....

 

Best to change now = chances are, after 25 years, your body can't/won't take much more.....

[abrahamzvi]

56 minutes ago, pgrahmm said:

I have a family tree history with alcoholism....Part of the problem is it doesn't really put me under & I can drink a LOT and never have a hangover....

My weakness is a good rum & coke or rum drink....Consequently I don't have it in the house.....

I also don't go where people go to drink - too many other people (usually not the good sort) & associations there with the same problem....

I'm not from a "pub culture" country so don't feel as though I'm missing anything.....

If I decide I want to drink I limit myself to ONE bottle for a month no matter how fast or slow it goes - or whether shared with guests.... Sometimes, if I feel it getting to me too much at one time/binge I'll pour 1/2 - 1/3 (whatever's left) down the drain & take the temptation away....

After reading up on the chemicals contained in Coke Zero I've cut back a good 95% - which probably helps because it was the most common mixer I'd use....

Good luck with your awakening & fight....Get by just one month & it will get easier....

The sleeping concern might have to do with a bar time body clock & addictive body expectations/tendencies....

Maybe substitute some type of exercise or training to tire yourself out might help - change your focus......Break away from your current routine/people/places = they'll suck you right back in....

 

Best to change now = chances are, after 25 years, your body can't/won't take much more.....

If you ask me, my answer is AA and strong discipline. AA is  most helpful, why not try? 

[cms22]

I have had similar problems. Left to my own devices (as I am now again when the wife goes back home for the weekend) I go straight back to it and always regret it. Spend too much, drink way too much (especially once I get on the whisky), get into scrapes with women I shouldn't, and feel like complete shit. Also deeply regret it when wife comes back.

 

Can't speak for you, but I've worked out that half of my problems are boredom and half are purely mental. If I get bored on my own I start drinking and am less able to be mentally strong and so 'no'. If I don't drink at all (or just a beer or two), being mentally strong enough to say 'no' is much much easier. It's why I dread being on my own for too long! No will power!

 

Anyway, best of luck. I understand what it's like.

[wump]

I started a topic in here earlier asking for advice. I was drinking a carton of beer a day and stopped pretty much cold turkey. Had a couple of relapses but who cares. Had to deal with a lot of anxiety and trouble sleeping. Putting too much pressure on yourself just stops you from trying and succeding. As long as you keep on trying you have not failed. I do the following:

 

1) Only ever drink beer if you have to. I had the worst nights when friends dragged me into a night club where beer was unaffordable and we had to open liquor bottles.

2) Don't be mad at yourself if you overdid it. Nobody is perfect. Every day can be a new start. For every bottle you drink less your body and mind will thank you in the long run.

3) Try to get some meaning into your life. I was bored to death in Pattaya and all I could ever do was drinking. Get a hobby, get spiritual, travel around, read a book, learn Thai, get into cooking, watch some movies, get a proper GF... there is many more things to life than sitting alone in a bar and chatting with some hookers.

 

What helped me with the anxiety was diazepam. Available if you ask around.. or if money is not an issue get it from a hospital pharmacy. For sleeping I recommend OTC medicine containing diphenhydramine hydrochloride. Keeps me sleeping like a baby for 8-15 hours straight (depending on how much sleep I missed the previous days).

 

And try to keep in mind that any shitty feeling/nightmares/insomnia is not caused by stopping alcohol but the result of abusing alcohol in the first place.

[papersource]

My advice is do not give in to insomnia. Keep titrating the booze down to zero. I am on month 5 right now of sobriety. There is no such thing as semi-sober. Lol. One beer and I will be back to getting smashed everyday again just like the last 30 years.

 

cutting down caused me a lot of sleep problems. If you can not handle the insomnia and are risk of a slip, what I use is a psych drug called seroquel 25 mg. I actually only take about 1/3rd of this small 25mg pill and too much will knock you out for sure and break a string of sleepness nights but leave me feeling like a zombie the next day.  Available otc at larger pharmacies in BKK for about 1000 per box i think.

 

Also suggest AA if you are new to sobriety. I know what I am talking about. I have quit drinking a thousand times. ;-)  It gets better as long as you do not drink again........

[oxo1947]

You have done really well---your body will be craving for sugar (as well as Alcohol) my daughter had a problem just a year ago... she found a book called "This Naked Mind" was a real big help in reaffirming stuff she already knew --& helping out in other ways, I read it--its a book that you can do a few pages put down/pick up has some good insights. I will PM you a MOBI copy --of course finial analyst is ..its all down to you.

But hey you have made a good start .

Ask the lady from the health blog..(cat Lady) about which sleeping pill to take, she does seem to have a good knowledge on what to take so you wont swap one addiction for another.

[Katipo]

I'm not an alcoholic, but the son of one. Good on you for trying to climb your way out of what is usually a very dark hole. Remember, as long as your not drinking more, you still have a chance. Just because you feel you are not going forward right now, at least you are not going backwards. Drinking more on the other hand, that's going backwards. So pat yourself on the back for getting this far. Seek support and council from professionals and those closest to you. It's only a matter of time before you start making progress again.

[Cory1848]

Hi -- Couple of quick comments -- Every person is different when it comes to alcohol, but your claim that beer is “just like drinking water” to you leaps off the page -- I’ve heard it before. The alcohol in beer is just the same as the alcohol in whiskey, there’s only proportionately less of it, and if you’re an alcoholic, you’ll just end up drinking more beer. Chemically, your body won’t know the difference.

The only way to convince yourself that you can effectively cut back, or stick to beer only, is to try it for a while -- as I say, everyone’s different, and maybe you can manage. Meantime, I suggest reading something about the science and psychology of alcoholism, see whether any of the patterns match with your experience -- above all, be honest with yourself. Seriously: you can’t bullshit your way through a drinking problem. If you want to talk with someone who’s been there, go to a couple of AA meetings and get a sponsor. There’s no obligation, and while AA can sometimes be weird or off-putting (it’s populated by human beings after all), you’ll get some straight talk. Think of it as a fact-finding mission.

As for the insomnia, I suggest a doctor specializing in sleep disorder. Could be related to the drinking, or anxiety about the drinking, or maybe not. Good luck!

[jeab1980]

Youve cracked the firstbmajor hurdle. You admit to being an Alcoholic.

Youve started step 2 by cutting down now tell all your friends your an Alcoholic and you need there help. You soon find out who are your real friends then

You need help with the next steps you really do.

Trying to go cold Turkey on your own is the most difficult thing to do. 

No idea where you are in the world but get help. Go to a AA meeting or go talk to a quack.

One minute at a time to start leads to one hour at a time leads to one day at a time and so forth. 

You will always be an Alcoholic just a recovering Alcoholic.

Good luck.

[Colabamumbai]

Congratulations you can do it one day at a time. I was a heroin addict, pure Thai heroin for many years, I kicked the habit cold turkey 35 years ago.  Alcohol is a little harder to kick when it is legal and for sale everywhere.

 

Sending you some love and light.

[atyclb]

exercise can help insomnia and its also good for body and mind. at times when i could not sleep just do pushups as many as i can on bed then the immediate exhaustion can help fall asleep

[natway09]

My sympathies to you.

Not sure that you are a true alcoholic as you do not drink in daylight hours, unless you have a "top up "

in the afternoon.

One thing I tried was to limit my times of drinking , ie not start until 5 pm, then 6 pm & so on.

Now only beer ( I am a beer only man now ) after a liver problem & do not start until 8pm (after dinner)

& manage to stop drinking for 18 hours a day (as my Doctor advised if I wanted to live )

Good luck & I hope somethings I have written will help. Stay strong & make sure you eat well

[Aussieroaming]

When you described yourself you described most people i work with who arent co-inhabiting with someone. You arent suffering from alcoholism, you sound like you are responding to boredom by drinking. Find an activity you want to do at night that disrupts the opportunity to drink or a hobby that gets disrupted if you drink. You just sound like you have gotten into a routine that you need to change by creating a new routine. Good luck with it. I dont drink a lot anymore but i have had periods where i did and i use running as a tool because running gets disrupted by alcohol and i like running so i make a choice. When i do drink I binge, so i limit the available alcohol at home so that i don't have an endless stream to swig. However like all people, sometimes i get it all wrong and get sh*tfaced, but rarely now.

[atyclb]

45 minutes ago, natway09 said:

My sympathies to you.

Not sure that you are a true alcoholic as you do not drink in daylight hours, unless you have a "top up "

in the afternoon.

One thing I tried was to limit my times of drinking , ie not start until 5 pm, then 6 pm & so on.

Now only beer ( I am a beer only man now ) after a liver problem & do not start until 8pm (after dinner)

& manage to stop drinking for 18 hours a day (as my Doctor advised if I wanted to live )

Good luck & I hope somethings I have written will help. Stay strong & make sure you eat well

 

 

not true. alcoholism is progressive and does not require maintenance drinking 24/ 7 until the body reaches that physiologic point. several patterns to alcoholism that do not require 24/7 drinking or daytime drinking.

[wanderluster]

i would like to thank you all for your positive insights and wisdom.  I am now 3pm just waking up from what i refer to as a double drunk, meaning getting drunk but waking up to early to actually get up so getting drunk enough again to being able to go back to sleep.  after last nights horrific nightmares, which have only happened to me 3 times in my life , all in the last week of semi sobriety, i wanted nothing to do with reality and drank myself to a proper sleep.

 

a lot of you said something about AA. ok i have actually never gone to a meeting, but from my understanding, and please correct me if i am wrong, it is a reliogious thing. maybe christian, but i would rather be an alcoholic than be brain washed by any religion. even pissed drunk i can think for myself. but again thanks for your info, and again maybe i wrong.

 

oxo i got your pm but could not open it. will look in to it

 

btw have a great lady living with me. this is not much of a burdon on her as i said i am never out of control in public, actually i am usually the man everyone around us realies upon to get them home safely when they get drunk in public. mostly thais. but some farong as well. get home she goes to bed and then i will start on it and go join her an hour or two later.   but that is not the point of this story...  

 

this story is about the bad dreams/nightmares now that i was cutting down this last week.  pills - well i have spent many yrs with many different kinds trying to use them to go to sleep instead of the drink, but pills give me a hangover the next day, feel tired, some time brain not work to the fullest. never get hangovers from alcohol, last time maybe in my 20s.

 

exercise i think is a good idea i might try evenmore.  i usually take the bicycle out for an hour ortwo  last couple of hours of daylight. even though i have lights on it, i also drive a car with heavyly tinted windows as is every car here, so i know the difficuties in seeing things at night.  and you think about the hundreds of motorbikes that drive around with no lights on. suiside drivers.

 

one said i was not a true alcoholic as i not drink as soon as i wake up or during the day.  25 yrs of 6-10 beer and 500 ml whisky a day. but i did say functioning alcoholic.  and if i was to leave bkk at 7pm to go back to jomtien, i would not touch a drink untill back to jomtien. not drink if i have something important to do.

 

again thanks all for the encouragement and listening to me,  hopefully that might be all i need to get over the hill.

 

much love, there actually is good people on this site.

[superglue]

Alcoholism is an illness which says to you that you are not alcoholic - a disease of denial.

I got sober via AA & did what was suggested including getting a sponsor. This was a huge challenge to my pride/ego.

'One day @ a time'. 'Go to meetings.'

The God concept was a real put off but they included a power of my understanding - it does not need to be Christianity.

Buddhism was a comfortable fit & I have not had a need to have a drink since  08 April 1984.

[recycler]

There is a lot of herbal stuff you can take to get rid of the side effects, for me tea with turmeric, cinnamon, pepper and coconut oil in the morning works perfect to balance out my body. Search for golden paste or golden milk, etc. There are many other positive effects.

[jeab1980]

AA has nothing to do with religion at all its run usualy by alcoholics for Alcoholics. Personaly i found it absolutley brilliant made some life long friends there who know and understand where you are. Something non Alcoholics cant do. Give it a go nothing to lose trust me.

[nasanews]

I would recommend Xanax to help quit alcohol and treat insomnia, you can get it from nearest clinic.

[Cory1848]

I second Jeab1980 on AA -- it has nothing to do with Christianity or any other religion. AA talks about a "higher power" and "twelve steps" and other concepts that sound suspiciously cultish to the uninitiated, but these are merely tools that you can interpret and use as you wish, or leave off altogether (although countless people have quit drinking by using these tools). AA is completely nonjudgmental, totally without obligation (well, almost -- you shouldn't show up at a meeting drunk), and exists for one purpose -- to provide mutual support for people who want to stop drinking.

[DrPhibes]

5 hours ago, superglue said:

The quantity consumed is irrelevant - it is the effect upon you & others.

 

Yup, have friends that run major aerospace companies/ex-space shuttle pilots/serious materials researchers, can drink like fish and still do their best and still be pretty damn good (funny) people.  It is the effect on you and how you relate to others while under the influence that matters.  If a single drink causes depression or makes you take things out on people, it is one drink too many.

[pgrahmm]

I've heard that insomnia is a part of heavy, long term alcoholism....

I used to have a vice president - a brilliant man that used to drive management crazy by checking on corporate places at all hours in the middle of the night....He was a recovered alcoholic that never recovered a normal sleep pattern....

Sleeping pills + a regular routine are probably a wise way to approach - but no defaulting back to alcohol....

It was not a good answer in the first place....Best to make the needed life changes - while the option is still in your hands & you still have time left to spend on this planet....

 

[superglue]

Sleeping pills - NO.

The AA saying is to swap the witch for the bitch.

Disclosure - I am unaware of the latest medications.

 

Help others to achieve sobriety just by being a good listener is a good start.

[superglue]

The topic heading is misleading.

Total abstinence is the only way to recovery if AA principles are adhered to.

[Blue bruce]

Don't worry man it seems weird now bit it will pass. I have been thru the dreams both with cigarettes and alchaol 

It took abut 6 months for the dreams and haluhanations to go go away but they do.

 

I cold turkeyed booze for 23 years and cigs for 55 years. 

 

Hang in there and good luck

[Cory1848]

18 minutes ago, superglue said:

The topic heading is misleading.

Total abstinence is the only way to recovery if AA principles are adhered to.

Plus, it's usually easier -- you never have to decide whether to have a drink, or whether to have another!