Helping the wife - why keep a dog and bark yourself - what do you think .

[Kadilo]

I thought I would show willing once and cooked the family a chicken green curry for dinner. They all watched fascinated while I was beavering away as I don't think they had ever seen a ferang cook before. 

We all sat down and started to eat and not one of them touched it. Ended up eating it all myself while they were picking away at fish eyes and other 20 baht delights. 

Lesson learned. 

 

 

Edited October 27, 2017 by Kadilo

[Crossy]

6 hours ago, bazza73 said:

I am, however, the Chief screwtop Jar and Bottle opener.

This is what guys do

[gamini]

Stupid post. Who is he asking? Wealthy expats, medium well off, poor expats. Wealthy ones have live in servants. Others have daily servants others have part time. many have none.

[scorecard]

23 minutes ago, bazza73 said:

My GF would be aghast if I tried to help her with household chores. The few times I have tried, I am repelled with a cry of " I can do!!" ringing in my ears.

I am, however, the Chief screwtop Jar and Bottle opener.

 

I am in charge of spreading the margarine and vegemite and jam on all sandwiches in our house, plus cutting the sandwiches into triangles. In fact my 3 Thai granddaughters insist that grandfather is the only person in the house and the world who can do it.

Edited October 27, 2017 by scorecard

[amvet]

9 minutes ago, Kadilo said:

I thought I would show willing once and cooked the family a chicken green curry for dinner. They all watched fascinated while I was beavering away as I don't think they had ever seen a ferang cook before. 

We all sat down and started to eat and not one of them touched it. Ended up eating it all myself while they were picking away at fish eyes and other 20 baht delights. 

Lesson learned.

We live in different galaxies.  I cook and the family line up to eat my roast chicken, pizza and BBQ ribs.  PS I am the official rice cook at all family gatherings and they insist I cook all the rice or no one eats. 

[Kadilo]

2 minutes ago, amvet said:

We live in different galaxies.  I cook and the family line up to eat my roast chicken, pizza and BBQ ribs.  PS I am the official rice cook at all family gatherings and they insist I cook all the rice or no one eats. 

  Maybe that's where I'm going wrong. Trying to beat them at their own game. Western food it is, and the element of surprise! 

[amvet]

My wife is OK but my dog lies.  They are both Thai.  The dog steals my underwear.  I come home and dog on her dog bed with a guilty look.  Puppy where is my underwear?  No reaction.  In Thai "Tee nai gone ken ni?"  Guilty look tail between legs and she leads me to the spot she has hidden my old underwear that I use as a dust rag. 

 

Bi lingual dog pirate.  Yes life's not fair. 

[scorecard]

1 minute ago, amvet said:

We live in different galaxies.  I cook and the family line up to eat my roast chicken, pizza and BBQ ribs.  PS I am the official rice cook at all family gatherings and they insist I cook all the rice or no one eats. 

 

Great.

 

I've even gained approval for my spaghetti sauce from my Thai son's very traditional upcountry MIL. When she visits she specifically asks me to make spaghetti.

 

 

[amvet]

Just now, Kadilo said:

  Maybe that's where I'm going wrong. Trying to beat them at their own game. Western food it is, and the element of surprise! 

Chop up some peppers in sauce and put it on the table as it goes on everything along with the ketchup for the pizza ugggh!  It is Thailand. 

[hocuspocus]

3 hours ago, electric said:

My wife has banned me from hanging out the washing.

Apparently I don't do it right ?    

 

Stuffed if I know how I survived so long before I married her.  

 

 

One of my wives told me I could not even load the dishwasher properly and now my new Thai wife tells me I can't even boil rice correctly.

 

[scorecard]

Just now, hocuspocus said:

One of my wives told me I could not even load the dishwasher properly and now my new Thai wife tells me I can't even boil rice correctly.

 

 

Blame the electric rice cooker or get a new wife!

[Jonah Tenner]

1 hour ago, thaibeachlovers said:

In my experience, men don't change, but women do. I'm pickin' they were happy enough at the start and then they weren't, but he didn't want to change ( and why should he? ). 

Women marry, expecting that the man will change.

Men marry, expecting that the woman won't change.

 

Normally both are disappointed. 

[bazza73]

I must confess to cooking up stewed apple, a favourite of mine. A kilo of apples, 2-3 cloves, some orange peel and ginger, water and a tablespoon of sugar. Bring to the boil, stew for an hour and a half.

Tried it on my GF, and she looked at me as if I had tried to poison her. Guess the lack of chillies confused her.

[bazza73]

28 minutes ago, scorecard said:

 

I am in charge of spreading the margarine and vegemite and jam on all sandwiches in our house, plus cutting the sandwiches into triangles. In fact my 3 Thai granddaughters insist that grandfather is the only person in the house and the world who can do it.

Spreading Vegemite is a task that only dinki-di Aussies are qualified for. The rest of the world just doesn't understand.

[amvet]

10 minutes ago, bazza73 said:

I must confess to cooking up stewed apple, a favourite of mine. A kilo of apples, 2-3 cloves, some orange peel and ginger, water and a tablespoon of sugar. Bring to the boil, stew for an hour and a half.

Tried it on my GF, and she looked at me as if I had tried to poison her. Guess the lack of chillies confused her.

No wonder.  You forgot the cinnamon and salt.

[Crossy]

54 minutes ago, Crossy said:

This is what guys do

Other important "Man Rules"

 

• If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
• Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
• I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
• When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really!
• If you ask a question you don't want an answer to. Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
• If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing". We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
• ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
• Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
• Whenever possible. Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
• You can either ask us to do something, or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
• If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
• If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
• Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
• Crying is blackmail.
• Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
• Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
• And Finally, and Most Important. We love you unconditionally (like the dog loves his master).

 

[scorecard]

43 minutes ago, amvet said:

We live in different galaxies.  I cook and the family line up to eat my roast chicken, pizza and BBQ ribs.  PS I am the official rice cook at all family gatherings and they insist I cook all the rice or no one eats. 

 

I had a big failure with hamburgers cooked at home. Good quality mince, an egg, italian herbs etc etc.

 

The problem was that, in the opinion of all family members, hamburgers can only come from McDonalds. 

[Laza 45]

45 minutes ago, amvet said:

We live in different galaxies.  I cook and the family line up to eat my roast chicken, pizza and BBQ ribs.  PS I am the official rice cook at all family gatherings and they insist I cook all the rice or no one eats. 

I can't say I'm the family cook.. my wife has that position.. but the family love my pizza.. & BBQ ribs too..  and the kids love my spaghetti bol..

[scorecard]

3 minutes ago, Crossy said:

Other important "Man Rules"

 

• If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
• Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
• I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
• When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really!
• If you ask a question you don't want an answer to. Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
• If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing". We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
• ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
• Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
• Whenever possible. Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
• You can either ask us to do something, or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
• If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
• If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
• Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
• Crying is blackmail.
• Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
• Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
• And Finally, and Most Important. We love you unconditionally (like the dog loves his master).

 

 

And a big item - don't ever try to understand 'up to you'.

 

I've tried a couple of times, wished I had not made any comment. 

 

Reminds me of my old western father, he always said, 'ask me anything', but his reply many times was 'you don't need to understand that.'

Edited October 27, 2017 by scorecard

[amvet]

24 minutes ago, scorecard said:

 

I had a big failure with hamburgers cooked at home. Good quality mince, an egg, italian herbs etc etc.

 

The problem was that, in the opinion of all family members, hamburgers can only come from McDonalds. 

Unless Muslim Thais don't like the smell of beef.  Try minced pork and you will be a success.

[oxo1947]

My wife isn’t talking to me because apparently I ruined her birthday.

 

 I’m not sure how I did that –

I didn’t even know it was her birthday….....

 

.

 

 

Edited October 27, 2017 by oxo1947

[pgrahmm]

4 minutes ago, oxo1947 said:

My wife isn’t talking to me because apparently I ruined her birthday.

 

 I’m not sure how I did that –

I didn’t even know it was her birthday….....

 

.

 

 

O-U-C-H »»»------->   T.R.O.U.B.L.E.

[theguyfromanotherforum]

My wife thinks I'm useless, so she does everything around house.

 

Yeah....I'm pretty useless.

[InMyShadow]

Most village wives that speak some English have been rescued from a bar and are just lazy cows.

You build a house you make her work or if your completey green you can "westernize" her but that is plain stupid

Sent from my Redmi Note 3 using Tapatalk

[Gracas]

I'm very good around the house, if I see something that needs to be done I will do it straight away. However I have not found anything yet.

 

Wife said she needs two washing machines for some reason, she has two washing machines, done.

If she needs to trim her nails I will do that for her. Put some Baht in her hand and send her to the nail shop, done.

How much more help could she need ???

[electric]

14 minutes ago, Gracas said:

I'm very good around the house, if I see something that needs to be done I will do it straight away. However I have not found anything yet.

 

 

Gracas ........ that's gold 

[Minnehaha]

My wife cleans nothing and never cooks although she eats out and orders out or rather buys and brings home. 

The maid / nanny does everything.  It is a lot of nanny hours with one day a week cleaning but kitchen living rooms get daily attention

 I don't mind cooking ad I get food I like cooked perfectly.  And don't mind doing dishes - I do it better and faster than the nanny or wife who is hopeless.  

She works and so do i.  We have businesses.  

Having lived as bachelor for decades I can clean cook and shop for the house.  The wife cannot shop.  She never cooked or washed dishes when child her mom did it.  This entitlement is an issue in the relationship.  Also the nanny is 24 and cute.  Hahahaha.  

[Jonah Tenner]

1 hour ago, amvet said:

Unless Muslim Thais don't like the smell of beef.  Try minced pork and you will be a success.

Or minced chicken. My wife and her son loves that.

[owl sees all]

With my first wife; English I would shout 'cup of tea' and I would get one after about an hour. By then I had forgotton about it.

 

My second wife was Caribbean and I had changed. No more calling out,, no,, I whistled for my cuppa instead. It would arrive fast but slopped in the saucer, luke warm or with salt instead of sugar. I would say to her; "you are a seemingly intellegent lady, How come you can't make a decent cup of tea." She would just snarl.

 

Of course now I'm older I have seen the error of my ways. I can't whistle 'cause I have no front teeth. And I've realised that shouting gets one nowhere. So I've devised a system that works well in Thailand; one clap for tea, two for coffee and three claps for a beer.

 

Sorted!!

Edited October 27, 2017 by owl sees all

[Skeptic7]

She does all the cooking, though I usually chop the chilies!  We wash the dishes about 50-50. She does 99% of the housekeeping. I do all of the laundry...except the few items (hers) that need hand-washing. We usually go grocery shopping together, as we have alot of heavy bags to tote and she alone couldn't manage.