SURVEY: Are men getting shafted?

[bazza73]

12 minutes ago, amvet said:

I believe the lady can change her mind the day after.  Isin't that what happened to that Aussie guy stuck in some embassy in London?

Not something I've experienced. If anything, once they surrender their virtue they want to consolidate.

[Caps]

2 hours ago, vogie said:

I was just wondering the other day whether I had a case for sexual harrassment, when I was in the army the sergeant major threatened to push his pace stick up my backside. ☺

is that beside the fact you might have enjoyed it mate 5555555

[rudi49jr]

6 hours ago, blazes said:

Another question could have been asked in the survey:

 

To what extent is this about celebrities (mostly female) using sexual power to get to the top?

That's not really the point here, is it? I'm sure there are women (and men as well, for that matter) who slept their way to the top, and maybe some women are trying to settle a score now, who knows?

 

But this is about guys like Weinstein who think they can demand sexual favors from women because they are powerful and they can make or break that woman's career. And it doesn't even have to be physical. Maybe you think it's harmless fun, but a boss calling his secretary 'sugartits' is just as much a douche.

[amvet]

12 minutes ago, rudi49jr said:

That's not really the point here, is it? I'm sure there are women (and men as well, for that matter) who slept their way to the top, and maybe some women are trying to settle a score now, who knows?

 

But this is about guys like Weinstein who think they can demand sexual favors from women because they are powerful and they can make or break that woman's career. And it doesn't even have to be physical. Maybe you think it's harmless fun, but a boss calling his secretary 'sugartits' is just as much a douche.

I think girls who use sexuality to get to the top deserve guys like Weinstein.  Or boys who use sexuality to get to the top (or bottom as the case may be). 

 

Once I had an angry husband confront me at work.  He asked if I had sex with his wife.  I said yes.  He turned to his wife and said I hope you got a big raise.  She smiled and said 5 bucks an hour. 

[Jingthing]

13 minutes ago, amvet said:

I think girls who use sexuality to get to the top deserve guys like Weinstein.  Or boys who use sexuality to get to the top (or bottom as the case may be). 

 

Once I had an angry husband confront me at work.  He asked if I had sex with his wife.  I said yes.  He turned to his wife and said I hope you got a big raise.  She smiled and said 5 bucks an hour. 

It's OK if it's consensual. 

In the gay world it's common and also a good thing for ambitious gay young men to expand their network and learn about the real world by bedding older men. Willingly. Not talking about overt prostitution. There can be very beneficial mentoring going on that's satisfying for both parties. That isn't abuse or rape. 

Edited November 5, 2017 by Jingthing

[amvet]

Just now, Jingthing said:

It's OK if it's consensual. 

I don't know if her husband consented although he was a friend of mine and I knew his two mistresses so he didn't have much room to complain.

[boomerangutang]

If God hadn't invented testosterone, we wouldn't be in this mess.  Indeed, we probably wouldn't be here at all.  Same could be said for fermentation (alcoholic drinks).

 

[boomerangutang]

I would have used my fame, along with promises of great leading roles in my upcoming films (to get some gnarly sex), .....except I was never famous and have nothing to do with film making.

[MyFriend You]

7 hours ago, blazes said:

 

It's not easy to have respect when some feminazis call young white men (or is it simply just young men?) as "rapists-in-waiting."

Hell, I used to introduce my  girlfriends as my next potential ex-wife, got a lot of laughs, sometimes the GF's weren't too impressed.

[smotherb]

I think there are at least two sides to every story. Yes, some influential men and women have used their positions to get sex, but also some underlings use sex to get ahead. There may indeed be a larger number of men guilty of sexual harassment, but women do it too. I was involved in a sexual relationship when I was a college student. I worked for a company and was assigned to an older woman boss. She was in her forties, and made it known she would like to have a casual relationship with me. I was not offended, in fact, I rather enjoyed it. She was still a good looking woman, she had a nice house and car, and she took me places I had never been and showed me things I never knew. She also gave me two promotions and helped me get a college scholarship from the company.  So, did I sell myself? You bet. Was it sexual harassment? Well, by the legal definition, the sexual advances have to be unwelcomed to qualify as harassment. Since I was not offended by her advances; I do not believe it was harassment. However, if, for some reason, I decided to get back at her; I could certainly claim the advances were not welcomed. That, I am afraid, may be some of the issues today; especially from those whose desires were not fully realized even after they gave sexual favors.

[Credo]

It is a complicated issue, but as a generalization, I think that men are being collectively punished for things which were acceptable in previous times.   I think the laws about statutes of limitation have been changed to the legal disadvantage of men.   Again, this is a generalization.

 

People are sexual, and men are more easily stimulated visually whereas women are more likely to be swayed by personality.   We figure out where we are with others sexually by making advances, with some more or less acceptable than others.   

 

If force is used against someone, or if unwanted advances aren't heeded, and it rises to the level of a legal situation, then that is the course of action it should take.   If it doesn't, trashing someone 20+ years later should be met with with a libel/defamation suit.   

 

We have a lot of people jumping on the bandwagon for a lot of things.   

[Basil B]

13 hours ago, attrayant said:

Curious as to why Trump's sexual assault allegations were left out of the OP.  

He may sue...

[Basil B]

Problem has been party workers, they are very vulnerable and often treated as cannon fodder by the mandarins of the party, case in point was the MP who was reprimanded yet weeks later promoted to the shadow cabinet.

 

A lot of what has been reported would normally come under "unacceptable behaviour" but in the work place may well warrant disciplinary action, but seems the way the political parties work is to report it to the whips office who use the information to blackmail the MP's into line.

 

.  

  

[bendejo]

A few years ago at an awards ceremony in Hollywood, The Independent Spirit Awards, director John Waters (who, BTW, is openly gay) made a casting couch joke.  The crowd, which was pretty boisterous, went silent -- you could have heard a condom drop.

 

Added irony to all that's been going on lately is that Kevin Spacey once made a movie about how show-biz deals are really made.

 

 

[MaeJoMTB]

17 hours ago, AGareth2 said:

some cases such as the 14 year old boy are different

from an adult allowing a powerful pervert to get away with sexual assault in order to advance your career 

the allegations of rape should be taken to court

They need evidence for  court, social media is easier.

[thaibeachlovers]

Can the title be amended please. I assumed that it was about men in general, but it's specifically about the rich and powerful.

BTW, wealth and power are the greatest aphrodisiacs known to mankind. None of those women would have gone in harms way with the men in question if they were plumbers or garbage collectors.

[George FmplesdaCosteedback]

A forth question is really what was needed:

Was the "casting couch" invented by men or women?

 

It's not easy to determine taking into account the era, culture and laws at the time.

What complicates that is the law on homosexuality has been completely repealed in western culture (but lives on in muslim communities, and throughout eastern muslim and some other religion following countries).

 

The Jimmy Savile case where vulnerable young people were exploited, or the case of Ted Bundy are parameters these things should be judged by, not by the ignorant on Social Media (SM) in a mass witch hunt.

Women who flirt and titillate to gain financially or career wise should have a responsibility for their actions and any element of encouragement should be taken into account.

"No means no" but it should be made plain early in an encounter, not on the point of entry.

 

Claiming rape the next week because he didn't ring or you didn't get the part is where it needs care in investigation.

The SM high court is not the place to decide guilt.

 

 

 

[USPatriot]

It has gotten to the point where you can't say  you look nice to a female.

 

I don't agree with grabbing women and such but trust me I come from an extremely rich family and a lot of the women chase the money and power.

 

I'm sure weinstine is a pos and women throw them selfsame at him not all but a lot.

 

I do believe what the women are saying but it is called the casting couch for a reason.

Edited November 6, 2017 by USPatriot

[George FmplesdaCosteedback]

10 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Can the title be amended please. I assumed that it was about men in general, but it's specifically about the rich and powerful.

BTW, wealth and power are the greatest aphrodisiacs known to mankind. None of those women would have gone in harms way with the men in question if they were plumbers or garbage collectors.

Have you had a plumbing bill recently?

Ha ha!

[nausea]

We have our first male casualty:

 

"The former Welsh government minister Carl Sargeant has been found dead days after it emerged that a number of women had made allegations of improper personal conduct against him."

 

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2017/nov/07/suspended-welsh-labour-politician-carl-sargeant-has-died

[thaibeachlovers]

On ‎11‎/‎6‎/‎2017 at 11:48 PM, USPatriot said:

It has gotten to the point where you can't say  you look nice to a female.

 

I don't agree with grabbing women and such but trust me I come from an extremely rich family and a lot of the women chase the money and power.

 

I'm sure weinstine is a pos and women throw them selfsame at him not all but a lot.

 

I do believe what the women are saying but it is called the casting couch for a reason.

I worked with mainly women in my last career, and from the 90s on I would never compliment one of them for any reason, nor ask one out on a date, and I never put myself in a situation which could be misconstrued because I had become concerned about women falsely accusing men of misdeeds.

For the same reason, I would never give a woman alone a lift in my car ( unless I knew her very well ).

[thaibeachlovers]

On ‎11‎/‎7‎/‎2017 at 2:09 AM, George FmplesdaCosteedback said:

Have you had a plumbing bill recently?

Ha ha!

No, I do all my own plumbing . Unfortunately, it never got me a happy ending .

[AGareth2]

A politician in the UK topped himself!

Is it going too far?

[thaibeachlovers]

1 hour ago, AGareth2 said:

A politician in the UK topped himself!

Is it going too far?

IMO expect more. Even false accusations can destroy a man's reputation and career nowadays.

"No smoke without fire" they all chirrup away.

[Caps]

11 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

I worked with mainly women in my last career, and from the 90s on I would never compliment one of them for any reason, nor ask one out on a date, and I never put myself in a situation which could be misconstrued because I had become concerned about women falsely accusing men of misdeeds.

For the same reason, I would never give a woman alone a lift in my car ( unless I knew her very well ).

...and dont you find it a bit sad that you feel you can not do that?  

[thaibeachlovers]

13 hours ago, Caps said:

...and dont you find it a bit sad that you feel you can not do that?  

Of course, but PC has destroyed the civility between the sexes. In my experience, women are liable to interpret anything men do in a negative manner.

I didn't give compliments to female co workers because while the ones I spoke to would have understood, any that heard me would have accused me of sexism, and it was hard enough being an opinionated man in a female environment without creating a rod to beat me with. I think most men in western countries don't realise how endemic PC is on the female side. The safest policy was not to say anything possibly contentious.