The week that was in Thailand news: Bare faced cheek.

[rooster59]

The week that was in Thailand news: Bare faced cheek.

 

 

One of the funniest things I have ever seen in my life happened when I was about 17 on my way to a football match in the northern English resort of Blackpool. The supporters were rowdy, chanting as we marauded through the cobbled streets on the way to the ground for the first away game of the season.

 

The net curtains were twitching and being Londoners, and young, we had nothing but spirited contempt for these impoverished northerners peering out as we strutted along in our fashionable drainpipes.

 

“Blimey look at those old dears gawkin’” someone shouted adding, “I’ll give ‘em something to remember”. He turned round, bent over and dropped his jeans - the curtains were hurriedly shut in shocked disgust.

 

Now I was never what the British called a juvenile delinquent – but I have always been juvenile. I am British after all and what amounts to half a lifetime in Thailand has really only served to reinforce the schoolboy humor that I grew up with.

 

It wasn’t just the Thais. The best part of a decade teaching Japanese children and their parents English door-to-door in Bangkok only served to confirm that they too thought that if a joke about a fart was funny once, then it would always be so.

 

Little wonder then that despite years of willing indoctrination into the wonders of Thai culture and tradition I found it quite hard to cultivate much umbrage from the most popular and commented upon story of an amusing week on the pages of Thaivisa forum.

 

Namely the variously termed “Butt Roadshow” of the Americans – dare one say gays – revealing their ample derrieres in front of Wat Arun for the predilection of their 14,000 Instagram faithful.

 

I was not outraged of Ratchayothin – amused if anything – by the interplay of the righteous and indignant with the couldn’t-care-less!

 

Some called for jail terms; Rooster called the missus to come and have an eyeful rather like all those years ago on the way to Blackpool FC.

 

Bewildered by the computer screen she said the only thing she had thought about for days: “Oooor, Hally ja teng ngaan laew ler?” – (concerning the upcoming Royal Nuptials, eh?) – was there no escape from this madness….

 

Ultimately the Thais seemed to get it about right – a 2,500 baht fine for each cheek seemed reasonable. Surely jail time must be reserved for those who toss butts on beaches rather than merely reveal them.

 

Bare faced cheek pervaded much of an entertaining seven days that began as the butt of many a Rooster quip – Her Elegantness the Former Tourism Minister Khun Kobkarn – turned on the waterworks and praised her three year torture, I mean tenure.

 

She had made everybody richer by taking from the zero dollar Chinese and giving to the poor and what the hell did it matter if stepping on a boat still meant almost certain death and the sex industry would be here for evermore.

 

It always has been so why not.

 

The new incumbent is Harvard and Chula educated Weerasak Kowsurat who appears very photogenic so he should slot in nicely to the ex-minister’s shoes. I hope that if he reads this column he has a sense of humor.

 

My only advice to him is not to take his country too seriously as no one else does and at all costs to avoid the word “hub” and inventing figures.

 

Bare faced cheek was not something that Thailand’s candidate for the Miss Universe crown had to show, in public, at least but Maria was obliged to come up with an answer about the most important ‘social movement’ of her generation.

 

I would have been tempted to share a bit of Thai world language at this point along the lines of “Arai Wa?”.

 

Social Movement?  I genuinely had to scratch my head to think of one in Thailand that wasn’t laced with abject facetiousness.

 

Bravely, our Maria mumbled something about the young stepping up to the plate and by that she meant being proactive for the nation rather than just having lunch. The population was aging she added sagely, but by now the crown had slipped and all that was left was fifth place and a few tears.

 

Looking back, she will realize one day that all she actually needed to say was “sufficiency economy” to take the plaudits rather than the brickbats.

 

When confronted by a social movement question it is usually best to play safe and mention something like ‘youth and drugs’ which reminds me of my favorite comment of the week on Thaivisa Facebook from “Colin Plant” that also referenced the story of the US guys and their butts at the temple:

 

“Say NO to crack”.

 

Most manufactured story of the week – itself a bit of bare faced journalistic cheek – was the criticism of the kind of tourists that Pattaya – or QUOTES – the Queen Of The eastern Seaboard – is wont to attract.

 

Rather than merely expound on the tedium of the Sophon story about tourism being up 5.732% after fleet week we were told that the five posters commenting on their Facebook site were bemoaning the fact that the arrivals were all unspeakable Indians, noisy Chinese or people Drumph would rather not let into his backyard.

 

The baying hounds of social media piled into agree with the bigotry though at least some wise Australians and Americans observed that at least the new age tourists weren’t British.

 

On the forum there were almost thirty pages of comments with nary a soul pointing out how the translator had trolled them into indignation with an unrepresentative basket of bias.

 

I mean if you based news stories on the comments of posters on Thaivisa you’d make the US president’s fake news claims look genuine.

 

Also verging on the viral this week was another case of bare faced – if not cheeked – impudence. This involved the bashed Swiss man – one could only assume he was a tourist or deranged or both – who thought it a jolly good jape to turn off a Thai guy’s noisy bike.

 

The man from the land of the cuckoo clocks would be well advised to remember Rooster’s oft said advice about sticking your nose into unwanted Thai business – do so and risk going home in a box.

 

Rooster doesn’t condone violence but at least Andreas with all that blood on his top wasn’t arrested for being a Red Shirt.

 

And if he read the forum comments he should now be fluent in one of Thai’s most important phrases: Som Nam Na (serves you right).

 

Barefaced also sums up the disgusting antics of the teaching assistant at a kindergarten caught on tape yanking, smacking, slapping and punching defenseless three and four year olds. She “apologized” later – tell it to the judge.

 

There are two things that are sure to make gnarly old Rooster cry. One is great kindness and respect shown to children – the other is its antithesis, this ghastly behavior that Thai Rath so correctly said was endemic in Thai schools.

 

Combined with its equally hideous bedfellow – the connivance of education authorities and school directors to protect abusive teachers and staff and hush up appalling incidents – we are left with a dire situation.

 

A situation that is decades past its sell-by date as millions of children have been sold down the river in a cycle of abuse by those who are entrusted to protect them.

 

Yes, it brings tears to the eyes; tears that I would like to see in the pupils of the eyes of those attackers as they are sacked rather than in the scared eyes of the pupils that they abuse.

 

Meanwhile, barefaced lying came to mind in the Rooster household as the annual song and dance of the reason for my visit to the Motor Show reared its ugly head.

 

Like most Thai wives she believes that the only reason men go to Impact Arena, where the show started this week, is to ogle the pretties and rediscover some lascivious libido among the limousines.

 

Not that she exactly put it in those terms of course, preferring to belittle Rooster with some remark about being an “old snakehead”.

 

If only she knew that I really was just going to look at the chassis…..

 

And so to this week’s Rooster awards. Following last week’s tongue in cheek Angel of Mercy story about a waitress at Swensen’s, I would like to give a “Real Angels” award to Dr Prakong Vithayasai and her husband Vicharn, both in their seventies, who have helped more than 500 HIV positive children live healthy and productive lives.

 

As the planet marked World Aids Day on Friday I salute you both, with a tear in my eye.

 

While my “Best Video” of the week goes to the imaginative producers of the “Lao=cheng” (alcohol is a curse) campaign for their enjoyable ad to discourage giving booze as presents. If you don’t smile at that you don’t have even a semblance of a Thai heart.

 

Finally, I would like to award another “Best Comment” award this time for the Thaivisa forum where wag “lamyai3” was remarking on the story about the knives and machetes on open sale on the wrong side of the security and the metal detectors at the Government Complex in Chaeng Wattana.

 

Seeing the vast array of potential weaponry just meters from the immigration offices we were told that it was an incentive….

 

“For taxi drivers to hang around and do a bit of shopping”.

 

Rooster.

 

 

-- © Copyright Thai Visa News 2017-12-03

[Commercial Diver]

Get a job

[Flyfish]

I’m quite sure Rooster has a job,or several if he wanted to....His “storytelling/journalistic “ skill is self evident.

Thank you Rooster for your weekly news summary. Proving as always that a calm spirit and sense of humor are important wherever in the world you live.

[Jingthing]

The style is a bit like Herb Caen.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Herb_Caen

Sent from my Lenovo A7020a48 using Thailand Forum - Thaivisa mobile app

[mikebell]

I have a fund of Amusing Thailand stories in my book of the same name.  I would love to share a weekly one with TV readers if the price is right.

[Mark mark]

I hope that no one thinks of setting up a Knife and Machete shop in side out Australian Government offices !!! ... or we Might end up a few good Public servants down !!! Har Har ...

[yellowboat]

9 hours ago, rooster59 said:

The new incumbent is Harvard and Chula educated Weerasak Kowsurat who appears very photogenic so he should slot in nicely to the ex-minister’s shoes. I hope that if he reads this column he has a sense of humor.

 

My only advice to him is not to take his country too seriously as no one else does and at all costs to avoid the word “hub” and inventing figures.

The current government is the most serious, drab, xenophobic and overly sensitive government in recent history.   Have yet to have met any lofty figure from Harvard or Chula who has engaged in anything more than influence peddling.  Guessing he will fit in just fine.  And the word "hub" will continue to enjoy its wide spread over use for the foreseeable future.   

[mikiea]

1 hour ago, Flyfish said:

I’m quite sure Rooster has a job,or several if he wanted to....His “storytelling/journalistic “ skill is self evident.

Thank you Rooster for your weekly news summary. Proving as always that a calm spirit and sense of humor are important wherever in the world you live.

watch it ...your lip's getting close to the dark h.........

[Colabamumbai]

Thanks again Rooster you make life here more enjoyable.

[Mark mark]

Thai Schools, - My Great Grandkids go to one near here !!!

 

My Great Grand Daughter and the Grand Nieces, (About a Motor bike full of them on the back streets) go to a Local school, called Watt Kai, just off the Asia Highway, and about 3 K before Bangpaharn Town. And it is OK, for little children, and Primary school also. There is a little girl at the Kindergarten who is only 2 years Old !!! …  Like that IS starting off Young !!! Right 

 

Watt Kai's problem is more, less Discipline, than abuse I think, like I really believe you, and the articles on here, like Violence in Thai schools IS a BIG Problem !!! …  And we should never turn away from this !!!  …. But well, like in the West ??? In the past, ? … Maybe it is more so in higher performance schools ???

 

I do believe you, and we all should not turn away from it for one Moment, but well, I would like to say, that well, though academic achievement might not be at the top end of the scale, … Like Lineup, … bang the drum, and ting the xylophone, and put the Flag up every Morning, as they sing and say Prayers !!!

 

….. There must be some VERY Nice Schools around also … and good teachers, like I would just like, to mention them.

 

(God I wish Australian schools had assembly now !!! … Like, too much like infringing the little bastards Rights , to have to do that !!! Right ??? …  Expecting them to be good citizens ???) ….   (Maybe they do have filling out your social security claims forms, for a bit of GOOT Practical interest instead ??? Right ???)

 

But at What Kai I think that teachers seem to just be happy, if the kids just turn up !!! ... Though well I mentioned that the Little thin bamboo sticks that they carried, sometimes, might get then arrested in Australia, and they disappeared for a while .... Still, I am sure that they’re more of a Threat, than actually a tool to be used. … And well, frightening but total unphysical damaging. … Like very small thin sticks. … Still TIT, and I remembered Thai Visa articles about MUCH worse Problems.

 

All the teachers that I see in the Kindergarten, and primary school are Woman though.

 

My Grandsons Teacher, summed it up pretty well once, when I talked to him, ... I asked him "So how was Butoui at school" ??? ... And his fairly revealing answer was … "Very Good !!! .... When he comes" !!! …  Like he probably spent most of his time in the local market, internet Games shop !!! #$%^&*)(*& …. Another Illiterate Now, father, but Unemployed factory worker, fast off of the blocks !!! …. Still. He HAS worked very hard, well, Re Poorly paid, long hours for a Lot of his life now, …

 

The Local High school, … well most of the girls that I know that have gone there have been Pregnant, and married by the time they are 15 or 16 !!! .... (Like my Great Granddaughters Mother, - Luckily for us in this case as we now have Buoy) ...... But well .... She, and my other girls are not going to follow in her footsteps, and go there if I have anything to do with it.

 

(When a Young Boy, gets a Young Girl from another Family Pregnant !!! and that is another story way to long to tell here, they just do not get away with it Scott free, …  I can tell you.)

 

I think I will try and move the girls in to Jurrasat in Ayutthaya when they are about 8. ??? To give them half a chance.

 

Then yes, …  I Possibly will have to watch out for Violence I think. ??? Like a bigger town and better performance demanded ???

[Flyfish]

Thanks Jingting! Was ignorant of Herb Caen until your post.Probably because I’m a Brit. Anyway,really enjoyed your link on him,gonna research more.

i suspect Alistair Cook (letter from America) was deeply influenced by him....I can see the influence when I listen to his broadcasts.

 

now sadly deceased,Cook must have been a contemporary of his having lived many years in San Fran and around the same time.

If anyone is unaware of Cook,you can listen to his podcasts from the BBC archives...a unique (almost!) broadcaster,wry,insightful and with a voice that soothes and informs. American history brought to life....I thoroughly recommend! 

[Jingthing]

Thailand's expat Bernard Trink was also obviously influenced by Caen.

[Mark mark]

4 minutes ago, Jingthing said:

Thailand's expat Bernard Trink was also obviously influenced by Caen.

Is Bernard still alive ??? … And if so is he still writing ???... I actually read one of his Genuine, hand written ... "Trink the Trink, Nus said"  Black Marker pen, graffiti, that he MUST have written himself !!! On the wall next to the cistern, while taking a slash, in a multi sex toilet in a bar in Cowboy once !!! … Would it have been the Old HHH watering hole … “The Hair and the Hound” ??? … Long gone now Of course ….

[Jingthing]

5 minutes ago, Mark mark said:

Is Bernard still alive ??? … And if so is he still writing ???... I actually read one of his Genuine, hand written ... "Trink the Trink, Nus said"  Black Marker pen, graffiti, that he MUST have written himself !!! On the wall next to the cistern, while taking a slash, in a multi sex toilet in a bar in Cowboy once !!! … Would it have been the Old HHH watering hole … “The Hair and the Hound” ??? … Long gone now Of course ….

I think he's still alive. Wiki shows him still alive. Very old of course. Of course Trink's old column is much more similar to Caen than the item here. I said it just reminded me of Caen a little bit.

[nausea]

14 hours ago, Mark mark said:

Like Lineup, … bang the drum, and ting the xylophone, and put the Flag up every Morning, as they sing and say Prayers !!!

Schools are like generals, always preparing to fight the last war.

[lamyai3]

23 hours ago, Mark mark said:

Is Bernard still alive ??? … And if so is he still writing ???

Yes. Still writes a couple of weekly book reviews for the same paper that featured his Nite Owl column. 

[Stargeezr]

Another good read Rooster, and no matter how Thailand has its  problems, I would much rather

visit there than some countries in South America, or Central America, especially, Venezuela.

or Honduras,  or even parts of  Guatemala.

Geezer