Good vs Bad Thai Girls - An Illusion?

[Thaidream]

Like the girl who once said:  "When I'm bad, I'm even better."

[OzMan]

Tertullian (c160-225), “the father of Latin Christianity” wrote that '"Woman is a temple built over a sewer, the gateway to the devil. Woman, you are the devil's doorway.' A lot of my experiences have not been that good either so I get his point.

[Stront]

11 hours ago, jimcarr65 said:

Good girl vs Bad girl? No such thing in LOS. Family will ALWAYS come first (mom, dad, sisters) and money second, Buddha third but the would like to make you think differently. Never get involved.

My wife has cut off her family (Mom, Dad and Sister) because they are lying cheaters who abused her for her whole life, and she hates that and by extension, them.  So no, First Family does not ALWAYS come first with Thai women.  But I accept she is an exception to this rule.

[chicowoodduck]

I will give you five answers and they all start with "What a wind-up!"?

[seancbk]

If Joe knows Khun A is carrying some other guys baby and still wants to marry her then why shouldn't he?

 

[ToddinChonburi]

Good job !!  Sometimes it's really hard to be a good friend. 

[Horace]

On 8/9/2018 at 2:17 PM, smotherb said:

Anyone can be bad. I can understand Khun A's predicament, she is a good girl in the eyes of her parents and wants to be married when she has the child. At least, she did a good thing by telling Joe it wasn't his kid. However, your girl--and so has Khun A, if she was involved in the threat of problems for you--has become a bad girl by telling you to tell a lie or else. 

 

If asked, I would tell the guy it was his decision, but I would not marry a girl carrying another man's child. I would tell your girl that I do not put up with threats and finish it.

Thanks.  I understand Khun A's predicament.  But I wasn't that sympathetic.  Khun A should have told Joe in the US before arranging a marriage here, leading him on, etc.  I did't know him that well, but I wonder if he was relieved to have good excuse to get out of this.  Khun A was very high maintenance and just could not see how their relationship would work.  I am pretty sure Khun A wanted to marry the pre-med student and I am pretty sure he said "no".

 

The threat turned out to be as empty as it was vague. It did end the relationship, which is probably for the best.  Imagine if I gave in?  She would then think she could compel me to do as ordered based on empty threats.

 

I basically told Joe the facts and he decided to split.

[smotherb]

1 minute ago, Horace said:

Thanks.  I understand Khun A's predicament.  But I wasn't that sympathetic.  Khun A should have told Joe in the US before arranging a marriage here, leading him on, etc.  I did't know him that well, but I wonder if he was relieved to have good excuse to get out of this.  Khun A was very high maintenance and just could not see how their relationship would work.  I am pretty sure Khun A wanted to marry the pre-med student and I am pretty sure he said "no".

 

The threat turned out to be as empty as it was vague. It did end the relationship, which is probably for the best.  Imagine if I gave in?  She would then think she could compel me to do as ordered based on empty threats.

 

I basically told Joe the facts and he decided to split.

I certainly did not feel sympathetic toward KhunA; notice I said, " . . . in the eyes of her parents . . ." However, I can see her reasoning. The fact she told him was commendable; before he left the states would have been better--better late than never. So, it appears my advice foretold the happenings, eh?

[5633572526]

On 8/8/2018 at 3:28 PM, Horace said:

OK, I thought about scooting fast, but I was in Chiang Mai Song Kran so travel was not really a viable option and that did not seem like the right thing to do.  To be honest, if I could have run, I might have, but I didn't.

 

I considered not doing anything, but I was asked, so I had no choice.

 

Agree that there was myopia here, and that is sort of my point.

 

The story is "real".  My apologies if it doesn't reach your literary standards, but I also don't care.  

 

Johng, I sort of did what you suggested.  I told Joe that it was up to him, but  he had been deceived, and that he was getting into a marriage with a woman that had deceived him to get US citizenship.  That was the goal. In other words, without saying "flee" I set out all of the reasons why he should flee.

 

A few points that maybe a few will see as trivial (but everyone):  

 

First, this divide between "good" and "bad" Thai girls is nonsense.  Cultures vary and, IMHO, this culture encourages this sort of deception and fraud.  There is a reason why Thailand scores so poorly on corruption indices.  Its taught in even the best families. 

 

Second, Farangs, minding their own business (in this case me), do get drawn into Thai soap operas and fraud where they have no viable options.  In some posts I see a tendency to suggest that Farangs are responsible for what happens to them; they could have avoided getting entangled into Thai scams if they were more careful.  This is simply not true if you live here.  Its part of the local color. 

 

Oh, and nothing happened to me, except that I got a lot of icy stares and sharp comments on the flight back to Bangkok (and immediately broke up with the GF who was pressing me to participate in the scam).  And Joe left Thailand without Khun A.  

 

 

I am glad you did not participate in the lie but I think you used your story as a means to preach to us about good and bad Thai girls which is a bit disappointing.

[Horace]

I am disappointed that you thought I was "preaching". I wasn't. Simply recounting an event where I learned a bit about Thailand some time back.  It's as simple as that.  Didn't realize this was a sensitive subject.

Edited August 13, 2018 by Horace