"Attractive woman" nearly murdered after drug crazed husband goes crazy

[Pilotman]

15 minutes ago, happy chappie said:

Thing is they will probably be back together when she heals up.unless he goes to jail she can expect more beating through the years.what a life she's got to look forward to stuck bringing up two kids and a junkie husband.

Then if she does, she will be asking for a repeat performance. The fact is, she's not 'stuck' with anything. She needs to get real and kick the idiot out. 

[ReMarKable]

4 hours ago, Pilotman said:

To my dying day, I will never understand woman (or men for that matter) who put up for one second with an abusive partner.  You see it the World over and it defies explanation. Even women of independent means seem to stick with low life, no hoppers who abuse them on a regular basis.  She had two kids with this moron, why for goodness sake?  In me at least, it tends to reduce somewhat my sympathy for the person being abused.  

Never blame the abused.  These nut jobs play with the woman's head and say things like "why do you make me so mad I hurt you?"  Again blaming the victim; like you just did.

[Old Croc]

There was a similar situation with some near neighbors very recently. 

The woman is also quite good looking, and he a druggie, often in trouble with the police. She works to support them and he accused her of having an affair at work, badly beat her, and also punched his own mother, the owner of the house.

At first opportunity she packed her bag, bought a bus ticket and was planning to get to safety with family in Isaan.  However, the mother told her beloved son where she was, and he dragged her in a headlock out of the bus station and back to the house. She ran away again without her bag of clothes, money or ID and hid overnight with some locals. They helped her get replacement ID and get on the bus and off the island, successfully this time.

I believe he's raging around the place trying to find out who hid his wife.

No one is saying.

[ReMarKable]

2 minutes ago, Old Croc said:

There was a similar situation with some near neighbors very recently. 

The woman is also quite good looking, and he a druggie, often in trouble with the police. She works to support them and he accused her of having an affair at work, badly beat her, and also punched his own mother, the owner of the house.

At first opportunity she packed her bag, bought a bus ticket and was planning to get to safety with family in Isaan.  However, the mother told her beloved son where she was, and he dragged her in a headlock out of the bus station and back to the house. She ran away again without her bag of clothes, money or ID and hid overnight with some locals. They helped her get replacement ID and get on the bus and off the island, successfully this time.

I believe he's raging around the place trying to find out who hid his wife.

No one is saying.

So he did not want lose his property; in his thinking.

[Pilotman]

8 minutes ago, ReMarKable said:

Never blame the abused.  These nut jobs play with the woman's head and say things like "why do you make me so mad I hurt you?"  Again blaming the victim; like you just did.

sorry mate but that's a standard cop out and it just doesn't wash.  We are all individual beings and we are all responsible for ourselves, our decisions and the consequences of those decisions, however weak we are in character.   However you dress it up, if she stays with  a known abuser, for whatever reason others may give it, then she is making herself a victim and is complicit to some degree it what happens to her.  I am not blaming her for what happened, I of course blame him, but she cannot escape the obvious fact that she knew what he was like and yet stayed with him and had children by him. If she then returns to him, that is idiotic and unsupportable.   

[ReMarKable]

3 minutes ago, Pilotman said:

sorry mate but that's a standard cop out and it just doesn't wash.  We are all individual beings and we are all responsible for ourselves, our decisions and the consequences of those decisions, however weak we are in character.   However you dress it up, if she stays with  a known abuser, for whatever reason others may give it, then she is making herself a victim and is complicit to some degree it what happens to her.  I am not blaming her for what happened, I of course blame him, but she cannot escape the obvious fact that she knew what he was like and yet stayed with him and had children by him. If she then returns to him, that is idiotic and unsupportable.   

I was a psychologist for a shelter for "battered"  women.  Believe me most of these women are psychologically disturbed by the dissonance I just described; If he loves, why does he hit me and then forgive me. 

[Pilotman]

4 minutes ago, ReMarKable said:

I was a psychologist for a shelter for "battered"  women.  Believe me most of these women are psychologically disturbed by the dissonance I just described; If he loves, why does he hit me and then forgive me. 

But which comes first?  Unless the lady in question is truly a very weak and insecure person, there must come a time in the early stages of any relationship when the obvious is clear, even to her.  If we are talking about mental illness, then of course that is a mitigating factor, but in many cases we are not. We are often taking about poor decision making.  Often it's just that they don't accept the obvious early enough and move on.  I too have seen it, but I have predominately seen ladies move on when the abuse begins, or well before it and avoid the trauma of what happened to this lady.   

[ReMarKable]

4 minutes ago, Pilotman said:

But which comes first?  Unless the lady in question is truly a very weak and insecure person, there must come a time in the early stages of any relationship when the obvious is clear, even to her.  If we are talking about mental illness, then of course that is a mitigating factor, but in many cases we are not. We are often taking about poor decision making.  Often it's just that they don't accept the obvious early enough and move on.  I too have seen it, but I have predominately seen ladies move on when the abuse begins, or well before it and avoid the trauma of what happened to this lady.   

The women might be slightly disturbed to begin with or abused as a child and it is the plan of these manipulating husband abusers to first isolate the wife from family and friends; if she has any.  When the abuse starts, she does not have reliable reality check contact like a friend or mother who might tell her to leave.  The husband apologizes profusely and treats her great for a while, but she must also learn to not leave the house when he is not there or some other condition which isolates her further.  So if she leaves the house, she makes her husband mad and soon learns that simple obedience reduces violence against her, but it is her fault, because she broke a promise to her husband by leaving the house. If she would stop being so bad. they would have a happy relationship.  So she has moved from believing the reality that someone who hits you doesn't love you to the position that her husband is only teaching her the best way for them to have a happy life and hitting her because he loves her and to make their relationship better.  These women in shelters will defend their husbands despite the abuse after this extensive period of reality distortion.  They still don't know whether to believe their body or their husband.

[Chelseafan]

3 hours ago, Mavideol said:

the guy didn't start using drugs yesterday...she knew about it and had a 1st child, why did she stay and have a second child, maybe she enjoyed being abused, no sympathy from me

Because no doubt she loved him and thought he would change his ways. "love" can blind many to their partners true colours.

 

[Oziex1]

5 hours ago, Mavideol said:

the guy didn't start using drugs yesterday...she knew about it and had a 1st child, why did she stay and have a second child, maybe she enjoyed being abused, no sympathy from me

Mama told her he would change when the 1st baby arrived he didn't, so Mama said he would change after the second, he didn't.

[emptypockets]

7 hours ago, Father Fintan Stack said:

Why have they blurred the husband's face out? Let the World see what a low-lie scumbag he is. 

 

On the bright side, now she's got the excuse to get that nose job she always wanted.

 

Why do you assume the guy is her husband? I see no reference in the article suggesting this. Might be her brother for all we know.

[metisdead]

An off topic post has been removed. 

[Classic Ray]

5 hours ago, kingstonkid said:

The police in any country will always  charge the man with a crime that they can make a case on.   Battery and almost killing me are not good  charges to lead with as they require the spouse to continue to pursue it.   

Unfortunately many times the spouse will withdraw the charge due to pressure  from friends or family  or a promise that the idiot will get help and it will not happen again 

It is not just here but everywhere that cops use this system 

That used to happen in the UK but no longer. The police will arrest the offender without a complaint, gather the evidence and the CPS will prosecute whether the victim supports the prosecution or not.

 

This is the best way to break the cycle of catch and release that domestic violence used to involve.

[Mukdahanman]

5 hours ago, transam said:

I disagree with most of that...????

I agree with all of that

[Redline]

So the police are only prosecuting for taking drugs?  <deleted> is wrong with them?  Don’t get it