How to motivate Thais to pay the money back?

[geoffbezoz]

8 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

It's always amazing what some people read into some stories. I guess you also think every brother is really the boyfriend or husband and all of them always lie. Sometimes the brother is actually the brother and sometime people have to pay money to the Thai police to walk or drive away.

And some people still believe whatever they are told without challenging the veracity of the statement.

[AlexRich]

10 minutes ago, baansgr said:

Never lend money in Thailand to Thai or Foreigner, you very unlikely to get it back...Thais never will,..why did he call your gf, why not his parents, wife, brother or sister....money is King and its gone 

Oh and a Thai asked me to 'borrow' them 1,000 today.....nah, no way, was polite i haven't got it.....even offered me her pussy...unbelievable

Was it a kitten, or fully grown?

[AlexRich]

4 minutes ago, geoffbezoz said:

And some people still believe whatever they are told without challenging the veracity of the statement.

It did cross my mind too, I’ll admit. But as he will never lend money again to her or any Thai (he has the perfect excuse) it might be money well spent.

[baansgr]

2 minutes ago, AlexRich said:

Was it a kitten, or fully grown?

54years old.....

[473geo]

So easy - as my wife handles our money, I just suggest if we can afford it, and she feels the relative needs the loan and will repay - go ahead.

 

Before my marriage I've parted with more as gift  - not a loan as didn't expect repayment

[AlexRich]

1 minute ago, baansgr said:

54years old.....

Eeegh!

[OneMoreFarang]

Thanks for all the replies. I am delighted that the amount of understanding comments is higher than the "your gf scammed you" comments.

 

Basically I don't count on getting it back but it would still be nice if I get it back.

 

Obviously there is a certain "risk" of asking a question like that on Thai Visa. But sometimes, from time to time, people have experience how to solve problems which others thought are not solvable in Thailand.

 

Like the comments above with HR and the judge. It seems that worked. So maybe I and others will learn how to get it done. Thanks!

[Kwasaki]

8 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Did you try it and how did that work?

Would you beat someone so that he needs hospital treatment because of 5,000B?

No you miss the point you are offering him a solution to get your 5000 baht back.

If your frightened to take his motorbike it ain't gonna work is it.

[geoffbezoz]

1 minute ago, AlexRich said:

It did cross my mind too, I’ll admit. But as he will never lend money again to her or any Thai (he has the perfect excuse) it might be money well spent.

OK but that means trust is destroyed. If he can not trust his GF what future is there in a relationship ? Zero

[473geo]

4 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Thanks for all the replies. I am delighted that the amount of understanding comments is higher than the "your gf scammed you" comments.

 

Basically I don't count on getting it back but it would still be nice if I get it back.

 

Obviously there is a certain "risk" of asking a question like that on Thai Visa. But sometimes, from time to time, people have experience how to solve problems which others thought are not solvable in Thailand.

 

Like the comments above with HR and the judge. It seems that worked. So maybe I and others will learn how to get it done. Thanks!

My advice leave it to the girlfriend- you have shown kindness - you don't really want to undo that  over 5000 baht

Edited May 21, 2019 by 473geo

[AlexRich]

1 minute ago, geoffbezoz said:

OK but that means trust is destroyed. If he can not trust his GF what future is there in a relationship ? Zero

I view them as temporary arrangements ... and I didn’t say that had happened for certain, just that it was possible. You don’t want to throw the baby out with the bath water. If you are right she’ll slip up at some point. But in the meantime he’s not going to get stung again.

[AlexRich]

Just now, 473geo said:

My advice leave it to the girlfriend

That was the worst advice possible.

[geoffbezoz]

1 minute ago, AlexRich said:

I view them as temporary arrangements ... and I didn’t say that had happened for certain, just that it was possible. You don’t want to throw the baby out with the bath water. If you are right she’ll slip up at some point. But in the meantime he’s not going to get stung again.

In the meantime he will be constantly checking up on her for clues. Not a relationship I would want but still guess there are plenty of mugs around.

[OneMoreFarang]

2 minutes ago, geoffbezoz said:

OK but that means trust is destroyed. If he can not trust his GF what future is there in a relationship ? Zero

Just to get this out of the minds of some people here.

I am together with her since many years and most of the time she is low maintenance.

She had from time to time more than 100,000B of my money cash in her hands and she never stole any money.

And in the theoretical case that she would try to get money out of me: Would she go for 5,000B as the big price? 555

[473geo]

1 minute ago, AlexRich said:

That was the worst advice possible.

I just edited my reply with the reason for my advice, I don't think 5000 baht is worth looking like a whining prat for, others may feel differently!

[geoffbezoz]

2 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Just to get this out of the minds of some people here.

I am together with her since many years and most of the time she is low maintenance.

She had from time to time more than 100,000B of my money cash in her hands and she never stole any money.

And in the theoretical case that she would try to get money out of me: Would she go for 5,000B as the big price? 555

Always best to be optimistic.  But remember some Thais are in it for the long term 10 years plus, not just a few years. Good luck.

[AlexRich]

6 minutes ago, 473geo said:

I just edited my reply with the reason for my advice, I don't think 5000 baht is worth looking like a whining prat for, others may feel differently!

The best advice is never loan money to anyone. Your edited version isn’t as bad.

[473geo]

Just now, AlexRich said:

The best advice is never loan money to anyone. Your edited version isn’t as bad.

I disagree, sometimes helping somebody out is a good thing, even if the money is never repaid. I guess there are those who just cannot accept there are some less fortunate, or some who occasionally need a helping hand.

There will also be many who give because they don't like to loan. That I well understand.

[JTXR]

If it were me, I'd just write it off and forget it. 

If you want, you can remind your gf every now and then that you still haven't been repaid and she can pass it on or not, but I wouldn't hold onto any hope.  In any event, if anyone in the family again asks for a loan, you can say, "Sorry, but you know the very bad experience I had with......"

[LomSak27]

2 hours ago, grollies said:

Life's too short mate. Write it off, let the relatives know you've written it off BUT, let them all know they can't come to you because of it.

 

Good Time to set out the shingle for all family members to see; Bank Closed

[AlexRich]

Just now, 473geo said:

I disagree, sometimes helping somebody out is a good thing, even if the money is never repaid. I guess there are those who just cannot accept there are some less fortunate, or some who occasionally need a helping hand.

There will also be many who give because they don't like to loan. That I well understand.

A gift is not a loan, and if you particularly like someone that is the way to go. But it is a mistake to lend money, you will either not get it back or you’ll be resented for expecting repayment. 

 

 

 

 

 

[Dumbastheycome]

14 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

I'd either assume 1) he was her lover or 2) she was scamming me.

Maybe both.

Or he scammed them  both?

12 years ago on the recommendation of my wife we (I) lent 10,000 Bht to a respected member of our village which involved standard paperwork available from local shops that  specified the conditions of the loan to be repaid in 1 year.

In accordance  with that  co signed paper I am now  owed  about  60,000 or the equivalent  value  in  rice.

Having  made  many  copies of that  with  UNPAID in Thai  at the bottom and posted  around the  village nobody  ever tries to borrow  from us . However it did  prompt him  to send 1500Bht via another person on one  immediate occasion.

The  balance I wrote off to experience.

In contrast of that petty amount I have lost $50,000 to a scamming  European who I knew and considered  genuine. Life  can be like that.

Now I slip small amounts  to people who I know are in distress (very elderly) but who never ask.

There was a time I was in similar straits .But I was young and managed to slowly climb out.

I have  no time  for those  who are  liers and deliberate scammers  but  there are also times  when  honest intent does  not always culminate in the genuine intent of promised outcome. Personal ending is based on trust and the onus is on the provider to make the choice to lend. It is only  really foolish if a loss is of significant damage. Sadly betrayal of trust is now virtually a callous component in almost every aspect of human existence.

 

[wisperone]

As Nancy Reagan would say..."Just Say No!"

[Lacessit]

Write it off. Let your GF know it's not going to happen again, even if the whatever is at death's door.

Very occasionally, my Thai GF will ask me for a loan of 1000 baht. We look at each other, and both laugh. We know it's a gift.

[monkeycu]

Smear some dog crap under his car door handles or his bikes clutch & brake levers

It would be worth it to see him pick his nose after 

Yes I know I am a sick and twisted individual  

[sammieuk1]

From my experience you can be dissed for a lifetime for as little as 1000bt????  

[RickBradford]

36 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

She had from time to time more than 100,000B of my money cash in her hands and she never stole any money.

And in the theoretical case that she would try to get money out of me: Would she go for 5,000B as the big price? 555

It's not about the amount of money.

 

It's that the brother, or whatever he is, knows there is no way that family (ie your gf) will pressure him to pay it back, it just isn't done inside families.

 

Just make it crystal clear that is the last time you will ever lend money to a third party. Try and reinforce the lesson by cancelling an upcoming party, or a weekend trip, or a purchase. Anything which you might be shelling out for in the near future.

 

Make it clear, make it memorable, make it painful, make it soon, and you may avoid similar problems in future.

[metempsychotic]

2 hours ago, madmen said:

6000 posts and you still lent money to a Thai ?

 

He obviously isn't to concerned about face, Most Thais Like to pick and choose their face loss

since when has a high post count on thaivisa been an indicator of any sort of understanding of thailand or thai people?

its often quite the opposite, an indicator of any real time spent interacting with anything but the computer.

I have helped plenty of my thai aquaintance in the past, never for a large amount, if it comes back, im pleased, in the more rare event it doesnt, its been an inexpensive education and ties are easily severed.

its pretty easy to see when its a bad bet, and a when it proves a good bet i have helped a friend.

this is not to say i spend my days handing out money, im more likely to say no than yes, but sometimes you take a chance.

i have been ripped off by more foreigners in thailand than i have thais. 

[Enoon]

My policy:

 

If I see someone that I think is in genuine need I will give them money......without being asked for it.

 

Any requests for loans, from whatever quarter, are met with a thoughtful look from me as I stroke my chin between forefinger and thumb.

 

The intention of that theatre is to convey the impression that "I'll think about it".

 

Then I forget about it.

 

 

 

[kingdong]

3 hours ago, Wilsonandson said:

You've been scammed dude! Easy to see that. My advice is ditch the girlfriend and move on. You live and learn.

 

 

 

 

i,d personally take it out on the g/fs harris,she called the deal on.