Thai gf kid ignores me

[Sheryl]

On 12/20/2019 at 5:32 PM, dd1988 said:

so basically that and the fact im probobly the 4th or 7th farang or so the daughter has seen come by to bang her mom

Yes.

 

And some of them may have behaved badly (or worse) to her.

 

And then there is the history with her father. This girl has every reason to be wary.

 

Be kind and give it time.

[Janner1]

On 12/18/2019 at 8:10 PM, dd1988 said:

I asked gf why she is like this and she said she doesnt know what to say to me. Id say she could start with hello though

You have answered your own question.

The child is looking for something in common so get off your self pity and lack of understanding and engage with her, Ask her mother what she likes to do, and do it with her.

You say she speaks English so find a topic she is interested in and converse with her.

Remember that you are an interloper into her world, the world she closely shared with her mother and you have put your muddy boots right in the middle of it.

It is your place to do the running so start by making her laugh, you being grumpy because she is grumpy and not looking at you is not helping the situation.

At this time you are the problem not her, because you are not reading the pointers.

Give it a go, what have you got to lose? Two weeks from now she could be sitting on your lap and calling you papa if you put in a little time and effort.

Good luck

[Janner1]

   On 12/18/2019 at 8:10 PM,  dd1988 said: 

I asked gf why she is like this and she said she doesnt know what to say to me. Id say she could start with hello though

You have answered your own question.

The child is looking for something in common so get off your self pity and lack of understanding and engage with her, Ask her mother what she likes to do, and do it with her.

You say she speaks English so find a topic she is interested in and converse with her.

Remember that you are an interloper into her world, the world she closely shared with her mother and you have put your muddy boots right in the middle of it.

It is your place to do the running so start by making her laugh, you being grumpy because she is grumpy and not looking at you is not helping the situation.

At this time you are the problem not her, because you are not reading the pointers.

Give it a go, what have you got to lose? Two weeks from now she could be sitting on your lap and calling you papa if you put in a little time and effort.

Good luck

 

• I have just read your earlier post someone kindly pointed out and I have to ask you to disregard my initial reply because it is evident that you are heartless.
• You dislike the child because you are not her father and she knows it.
• she is not badly behaved, she just questions why she should talk to someone who hates her.
• You are the problem not her.

[AlexRRR]

Why even bother.....you have now got an idea of the family, steer clear of woman with kids in Thailand I normally do, really why do you look for an excuse for the behaviour? The daughter will go with the mum as a package so either just keep visiting or trade in for a childless model, more around than you could imagine..

[thailand49]

You have been dating GF for a year but in and out for the last year!  Are you kidding me?  I've just read a few pages along with your comments many of your generalization are correct but what does that have to do with the child not coming across to you is it being lazy the reason she can't connect or look at you,

 

There is something you need and need bad and that is a world of patience so much patience and more patience and then understanding which isn't going to be easy!  You are going on the ride of your life the biggest roller coaster ever build there is going to lows, highs, and turns you can't understand there will be days you sit alone and think " what the <deleted> did I get myself into "  so if that's not what you bargain for then zipper up and move on.

 

Don't get me wrong you need to vent, vent and continue to vent because that might be the only why you will survive and if you make a commitment stick with it even if it cost you your life and don't do what Thai men do even Farangs and walk off when the kitchen get hot.

 

You are dealing not only with a 12 year child you have another on your hands which is the mother. Thais in general and I see it each day women who change up on men and think nothing of it in front of their kids and think " they understand " it is sickening to think a child understands even a 12 but this is o.k because this is how they were raise so they just pass it on. All the science in the world would tell you Children is most affected in a separation or divorce.

 

You go down this road to hell you put your needs behind it is no longer about you, it is about fixing them and that will come from your patience, understand and most of all Love! 

 

And if you are a American forget about bringing them abroad for years it will be slim and none but you are thinking right get them out and if all goes well they both might thank you one day if they learn to communicate and except constructive criticism?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited December 22, 2019 by thailand49

[gamesgplayemail]

You are so lucky ! just ignore them also !

 

[dd1988]

2 hours ago, gamesgplayemail said:

You are so lucky ! just ignore them also !

 

lol yep.

 

We are in vietnam without her kid and her kid is fake crying to guilt mom into coming back early. Mom is tolerating this behavior and gives no pushback.

 

Her kid is equally as full of <deleted> as her mom.

 

When I asked her what her kid was crying aboit she said broken computer. However i clearly heard otherwise.  just lol. This girl is a joke and is getting downgraded to fwb or nothing

 

dont know how you guys date thai girls i will only be doing rentals going forward

 

 

Edited December 23, 2019 by dd1988

[Tomahawk21]

Been dating thai gf for 1 year.  Ive been in thailand off and on since.  

 

Her kid speaks english ok but wont speak it around me unless forced bt her mother.  She hasnt made eye contact with me since my recent visit either.  I dont get a sa wad dee either unless forced by mom.

 

Is this normal? Kind of pisses me off. I was considering moving them to my home country but could not tolerste her rude brattish behavior

Edited Wednesday at 08:00 PM by dd1988

 

dont date girls with kids waste of time taking care of someone elese"s baggage 

lots of women in Thailand without kids. ive tried it forget it.

[Tomahawk21]

12 hours ago, dd1988 said:

lol yep.

 

We are in vietnam without her kid and her kid is fake crying to guilt mom into coming back early. Mom is tolerating this behavior and gives no pushback.

 

Her kid is equally as full of <deleted> as her mom.

 

When I asked her what her kid was crying aboit she said broken computer. However i clearly heard otherwise.  just lol. This girl is a joke and is getting downgraded to fwb or nothing

 

dont know how you guys date thai girls i will only be doing rentals going forward

 

 

you got a fare point mate. i agree 

[dd1988]

On 12/24/2019 at 6:59 AM, Tomahawk21 said:

you got a fare point mate. i agree 

 no one answered my questoin as to how a thai girl is dateble to a westerner....incompatable in every respect

[BritManToo]

On 12/23/2019 at 6:58 PM, dd1988 said:

dont know how you guys date thai girls i will only be doing rentals going forward

Most of us learned to 'rent only' in our first few weeks here.

That doesn't mean you can't live with one for years, they just have to know they are immediately replaceable if naughty.

 

Like I said earlier, if it were me, the kid would have been living with grandma back in the village after the first incident (or I would have moved on). You've really got to keep your feelings in a separate pocket to your wallet over here, it's not as if there's any lack of attractive and available Thai women to choose from.

Edited December 25, 2019 by BritManToo

[Nyezhov]

6 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Most of us learned to 'rent only' in our first few weeks here.

Weeks? Hours.

[AussieBob18]

13 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Most of us learned to 'rent only' in our first few weeks here.

That doesn't mean you can't live with one for years, they just have to know they are immediately replaceable if naughty.

 

Like I said earlier, if it were me, the kid would have been living with grandma back in the village after the first incident (or I would have moved on). You've really got to keep your feelings in a separate pocket to your wallet over here, it's not as if there's any lack of attractive and available Thai women to choose from.

"You've really got to keep your feelings in a separate pocket to your wallet over here.."

 

That by far is the best advice that I have ever read on TV for Expats with a Thai GF/Wife. 

 

I suggest many Expats should print that out and stick it on their wall or in wallet, and read it ever morning. 

 

It is not about love or lack of it - I love my Thai wife totally - but there is a 'game' going on and that is the number one rule - that and you can never ever win. 

 

Happy Wife = Happy Life - but keep your wallet out of it - learn how to do it without spending your money.

 

[kekalot]

5 hours ago, dd1988 said:

 no one answered my questoin as to how a thai girl is dateble to a westerner....incompatable in every respect

I read the whole thread and have to say you seem to be quite cringe and you need to learn how to deal with other people in general

I can tell just by the way you write in general and putting "lol" like young millennials do everywhere makes me feel that way.

 

If 88 is your birth year then you are only 6 years younger than me but your thought process seems off just like my son with his stupid ideas

I am not saying that there is something wrong with that, my son is socially backwards as well but he is also 18 years old and he was sheltered (by his mom) and never refused anything by her.

 

anyways, I have personally met at least 6 single moms along with their kids and they always loved me, maybe it's because I paid attention to them? who knows.

but I can certainly confirm that coming to complain on a forum about your date that you knew for a year but spend 3-4 months with will amount to nothing

 

 

[dd1988]

9 hours ago, kekalot said:

I read the whole thread and have to say you seem to be quite cringe and you need to learn how to deal with other people in general

I can tell just by the way you write in general and putting "lol" like young millennials do everywhere makes me feel that way.

 

If 88 is your birth year then you are only 6 years younger than me but your thought process seems off just like my son with his stupid ideas

I am not saying that there is something wrong with that, my son is socially backwards as well but he is also 18 years old and he was sheltered (by his mom) and never refused anything by her.

 

anyways, I have personally met at least 6 single moms along with their kids and they always loved me, maybe it's because I paid attention to them? who knows.

but I can certainly confirm that coming to complain on a forum about your date that you knew for a year but spend 3-4 months with will amount to nothing

 

 

id say you are cringe thinking a thai girl loves you.  That is stupider than anything  I said.

 

The hierarchy for them is kids, family, extended family, dog, cat, then farang husband.

 

Personally I wouldnt csll that love

[Peter Denis]

24 minutes ago, dd1988 said:

id say you are cringe thinking a thai girl loves you.  That is stupider than anything  I said.

The hierarchy for them is kids, family, extended family, dog, cat, then farang husband.

Personally I wouldnt csll that love

Generalization (projection?) is not reality.

Your experience clashes head-on with mine, but each to his own.

[dd1988]

2 hours ago, Peter Denis said:

Generalization (projection?) is not reality.

Your experience clashes head-on with mine, but each to his own.

ive never met a thai with any notable amount of empathy. 

 

They also think they are generous when they are not.  Even family gatheringa food is not free for themselves.

[Tomahawk21]

3 hours ago, dd1988 said:

id say you are cringe thinking a thai girl loves you.  That is stupider than anything  I said.

 

The hierarchy for them is kids, family, extended family, dog, cat, then farang husband.

 

Personally I wouldnt csll that love

maybe his ones different lol

[dd1988]

2 minutes ago, Tomahawk21 said:

maybe his ones different lol

lol ive dated several thai girls and there has been no empathy or consideration for my feelings. 

 

There is no relationships with thais only business like transactions.

[Tomahawk21]

4 minutes ago, dd1988 said:

lol ive dated several thai girls and there has been no empathy or consideration for my feelings. 

 

There is no relationships with thais only business like transactions.

i think that depends on one financial status, looks, build, general appearance, cleanliness and how you treat a Thai g/f. i dont have the financial problems with these girls.

[dd1988]

2 minutes ago, Tomahawk21 said:

i think that depends on one financial status, looks, build, general appearance, cleanliness and how you treat a Thai g/f. i dont have the financial problems with these girls.

Neither do I. 

 

I mean they are only with farang for financial gain no matter how good looking you are they dont care. If they do care its only for status amoung their peers not so much sexual desire imo

[BritManToo]

5 minutes ago, dd1988 said:

I mean they are only with farang for financial gain no matter how good looking you are they dont care. If they do care its only for status amoung their peers not so much sexual desire imo

I don't believe I've even met any woman from any country that wasn't with a man for 'financial gain'.

Sure they'll bang a poor guy for fun now and again, but they ain't gonna marry or live with him.

[utalkin2me]

It sounds to me as if there are more things wrong with you than the 12 year old girl who wont wai you. 

[dd1988]

10 hours ago, BritManToo said:

I don't believe I've even met any woman from any country that wasn't with a man for 'financial gain'.

Sure they'll bang a poor guy for fun now and again, but they ain't gonna marry or live with him.

yes they will...

[dd1988]

9 hours ago, utalkin2me said:

It sounds to me as if there are more things wrong with you than the 12 year old girl who wont wai you. 

absolutely anyone whos been with over 100 girls has serious issues imo lol

Edited December 26, 2019 by dd1988