Got two, half Thai/half Me, daughters both born and raised in Thailand. The younger, four years old, is fully bilingual and happily mixes with the natives, the older, eight years old, struggles in Thai at school but performs in English spelling contests.

I keep their nationalities and passports up to date and do my best to leave them some funds to resettle into civilization once they've grown up.

My son is almost 7.  Up until he went to KG my Thai wife and I spoke nothing but English.  All TV was also English.  Once he was at school my wife switched to Thai to help support what he was experiencing at school.  Within 6 months he was pretty much fluent in Thai.  Now he is completely comfortable speaking, reading and writing both Thai and English.  I would say that now if anything Thai is beginning to be the more dominant language, although he can switch between the 2 seamlessly.  He really doesn't seem to have a real preference, watching Thia TV with his mother and English with me.  The greater choice of interesting TV in English means he tends to watch that more.  As for gravitating towards me or my wife..... depends who's turn is to be good or bad cop!

17 hours ago, Gashead said:

My son is almost 7.  Up until he went to KG my Thai wife and I spoke nothing but English.  All TV was also English.  Once he was at school my wife switched to Thai to help support what he was experiencing at school.  Within 6 months he was pretty much fluent in Thai.  Now he is completely comfortable speaking, reading and writing both Thai and English.  I would say that now if anything Thai is beginning to be the more dominant language, although he can switch between the 2 seamlessly.  He really doesn't seem to have a real preference, watching Thia TV with his mother and English with me.  The greater choice of interesting TV in English means he tends to watch that more.  As for gravitating towards me or my wife..... depends who's turn is to be good or bad cop!

I have no idea how the human brain does this, but for kids they can hardwire their brains to learn language very easily.

 

As a kid, my Mom only spoke to me in Spanish, my Dad in English, and together they spoke a mixture of both. I can't ever remember growing up which language was which, I just kinda learnt to use the 'right' one.

 

We did this with my son. Mom spoke a combination of Thai and Lao, I spoke English and Mandarin. With hindsight since he ended up living in the US I should have spoken Spanish to him as well, but water under the bridge now.

 

But the upshot is the lucky boy speaks a bunch of languages fluently from birth. 

 

My only regret is that I didn't teach him to read simplified Mandarin, that may well have been a plus in this day and age.

 

His older step sisters are the same. I only spoke Spanish to them, their Mom English, both are totally bilingual.

 

I can't remember when, in both marriages, we stopped the one parent speaking one language thing, but it must have been somewhere around 6 or 7 when they had mastered the various languages and could swap between them seamlessly 

On 12/26/2019 at 9:23 PM, Pilotman said:

I Have a mixed race, Thai/British daughter, 21 years old now and living in the UK. We took particular pains to ensure that she strayed in touch with her Thai culture and heritage and she visits often and speaks fluent Thai and Issan. However, as she has finished her university education and seen how I am having to jump through stupid hoops here, and she has interacted with some of the bureaucracy and people, as we all do, she has become more and more disenchanted and indifferent to Thailand. In effect Thailand has lost her, as they treat her as more farang than Thai, so she is now acting that way. She has travelled the World with us, lived when she was young in other Asian countries and seen how they develop and live their lives  If her Mum and me did not live here,  and when we and her grandparents pass away, I doubt she will ever bother to come back. If asked, she will say she is British and leave it at that, actually she would probably say English.  Shame really. 

I don’t think it is that Thailand has lost her. It’s more that she has experienced different countries and cultures for the better. I have two daughters born and raised to their early teens in Thailand. One is still very Thai and the other very Kiwi. Neither are interested in ever going back to Thailand...in their late teens they did to visit friends but even that is now not enough of a draw card to going back. And surprising it’s the oldest who is still very Thai that has the strongest detest for Thailand. 

Our 6 year old son has an English father and a Thai mother (my Wife and I). 

He is not half anything, he is English and Thai. 

 

His English is spot on (for a 6 year old). His English education is a priority to me, we have him placed at a top international School in Bangkok. If I couldn't secure his place at a top international school we would be back in the UK already (not judging anyone else, that's just the expectations I have for the education of my child). 

 

His Thai Language education is also important, he has additional Thai Classes at his School in addition to extra curricular Thai Classes. His Thai is not up to the same standard as other Thai Children of similar age. 

 

Our son Talks Thai to his Mother and Grandparents, Aunties and Uncles, his school have advised that this is important as in school he is taught 100% in English with the exception of his Thai Classes. I speak to my Son in English. 

 

I have high expectations of the level of my sons Thai, by adulthood I would like him to speak Thai to the same degree a well educated Thai would (i.e. Lawyer etc). I also have similar expectations of his English. 

 

I have also ensured that the School we placed him in was not 'dominantly' Thai, this was primarily to avoid the cliques and potential luk-krueng bullying, but also the flawed mindset which may accompany a dominantly Thai schooling environment (example at hand Ekkamai International School, which is primarily Thai).

 

 

Our son mixes well with other Thai kids and is not shy to speak Thai, though it would appear his preference is to speak English, when the English skill of the other party is limited I have observed my son to switch to Thai quite easily. It would appear there is no confidence issue in doing so although his Thai is imperfect (for his age), I see this as a positive, it can only help him develop. 

 

 

With regards to attention: It has been commented by many Thai's that our son is 'handsome' - in fact, when my wife posts a new photo on facebook, all her Thai friends comment 'handsome' and that's pretty much all they comment on as if they lack the capacity for any other comment (its all quite mindless). We get comments from strangers and even girls, usually teenagers have asked to have their photo taken with him!!! all quite amusing !

 

--------

 

In short, the environment in which we have placed our son 'should' ensure he has no confidence or identity issues with regards to nationality, but at 6 years old its too early to tell.  That said, his life and the manner in which he is treated is molded by his school, we just ensure we guide a happy and loving home life. 

 

The majority of his peers are 'International kids' and 'International Thai kids'. Some of these are the friends he will have for the rest of his life, some of the friends he will make in next 5 years will become friends for life. 

 

Unfortunately a facet of placing our son in an international school is seeing the heartbreak of close friends moving on, we've already seen this happen and its heartbreaking to see close friendships end when another family move away. 

 

 

 

 

 

Interesting topic, we also have a daughter who we can't cut into 2 pieces.

Now 4 and a bit her go to language is Thai but I am generally happy with her English, my Thai is poor and she knows it, but we communicate fine and when family visit after the initial shyness she is fine for her age.

My concern is balance, for me I want her to be native in both in all disciplines.

Proper International Schools are just above my budget and probably lacking on the Thai side so I plan a mixed bag, English/Thai for Kindergarten, cheaper International ( looking at 1 school that does 80/20 ) for the next few years.

If she shows some promise ( let's be honest some kids just dont do well at school )then I will sell some stuff and go balls deep on her higher education.

Probably went off topic apologies.

A troll post and replies to it have been removed.

On 12/26/2019 at 1:13 PM, FritsSikkink said:

A 4 year old... If he doesn't speak Thai at his teacher tell him off.

 

Yes, a 4 year old really develops by being berated by the one person he unconditionally adores and loves. 

Anybody notice that so many of the ones shouting about how it's best to forget Thai culture, language and society, are the one living here. Married to a Thai raised Thai, paying monthly payments whilst jumping through immigration hoops just to do so?

 

 

That's a bit odd.  

9 hours ago, Happy Grumpy said:

 

Yes, a 4 year old really develops by being berated by the one person he unconditionally adores and loves. 

My kids are developed very well, what about yours? Children need to be taught discipline and rules. Good behavior you reward, bad behavior you need to correct.

4 hours ago, FritsSikkink said:

bad behavior you need to correct.

Correcting behavior means telling them off??

 

 

Ohh dear. ????

8 hours ago, Happy Grumpy said:

Correcting behavior means telling them off??

 

 

Ohh dear. ????

English isn't my first language.

Our mixed son is 20 now, at the University of Florida

 

He can speak fluent English, Spanish and Thai

 

Still speaks Thai at home with his mother, no where else unless he is a situation to be respectful to Thai relatives.

 

He does not associate being Thai at ALL, and will never admit to it or tell anyone he is.

 

He has zero interest in Thailand or anything else Thai. Thai girls no way!

 

Just recently back in Thailand for the first time in 6 years, he was in complete dismay and hated it. He said never again in this lifetime and he means it.

 

The kids he grew up with, still working in the fields in Isaan, most married with kids, have nothing. He has nothing to relate to with them anymore.

 

He was brought up to understand the importance of education, career, finance how to be able to be independent and earn what you want from life. 

 

Studyaholic. Likes being at the Uni and studying everything; being around other smart kids.

 

Sharp, bright kid. He knows he can be anything he wants to be with no limitations unlike his chances in Thailand.

 

We let him choose his own course and we know he will do fine.

 

Even though he was in one of the most expensive international schools in Thailand, he was still a year behind when we came back to the USA.

 

I feel like that motivated him to study harder and catch up to his age group quicker.

 

I marvel at everything he has accomplished in his short life already.

 

He will have a life where he can support a family, have a career and earn enough to pay for it all.

 

Most of all, he is very happy with his life and his opportunities.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Whatever the above, I would not downplay the opportunities available to young Thai students who can 'shine' in international math competitions in China even against hard-nosed  Chinese students --

 

Thai students shine in China math competition- Aug 03. 2018

 

Thai high-school students who won 14 awards at the just-ended China Southeast Math Olympiad received a warm welcome home at Suvarnabhumi International Airport on Thursday night.

 

https://www.nationthailand.com/national/30351366

 

 

1 hour ago, SkyFax said:

Whatever the above, I would not downplay the opportunities available to young Thai students who can 'shine' in international math competitions in China even against hard-nosed  Chinese students --

 

Thai students shine in China math competition- Aug 03. 2018

 

Thai high-school students who won 14 awards at the just-ended China Southeast Math Olympiad received a warm welcome home at Suvarnabhumi International Airport on Thursday night.

 

https://www.nationthailand.com/national/30351366

 

 

'One swallow doesn't make it spring'. Covering up massive inadequacies in the Thai educational system, by the country praising a very rare few, is not the way that the country will improve. Good on them, but they are a aberration in an otherwise dysfunctional system. 

13 hours ago, bwpage3 said:

The kids he grew up with, still working in the fields in Isaan

 

13 hours ago, bwpage3 said:

Even though he was in one of the most expensive international schools in Thailand,

 

Which of the most expensive international schools in Thailand is situated among the fields of Isaan?

 

Thanks. 

1 hour ago, Pilotman said:

'One swallow doesn't make it spring'. Covering up massive inadequacies in the Thai educational system, by the country praising a very rare few, is not the way that the country will improve. Good on them, but they are a aberration in an otherwise dysfunctional system. 

They are the exception, no doubt. But when you read of usually LK kids, who were laggards in Thailand but then blossomed when relocated to farang-land, it just means that those kids were not among the exceptional.

22 minutes ago, SkyFax said:

They are the exception, no doubt. But when you read of usually LK kids, who were laggards in Thailand but then blossomed when relocated to farang-land, it just means that those kids were not among the exceptional.

That is so true.  It's not the fault of the kids, it's the uneducated parents, untrained, lazy and inadequate teachers and a dysfunctional government that is to blame. Most kids in most countries of the world will respond well if challenged by good teaching.

Well then maybe it's just me because I have in the past worked with some of the exceptional kids who, if they went to the US, might be a grade or 2 ahead of their fellow classmates instead of a grade or 2 behind.

15 hours ago, bwpage3 said:

Our mixed son is 20 now, at the University of Florida

 

He can speak fluent English, Spanish and Thai

 

Still speaks Thai at home with his mother, no where else unless he is a situation to be respectful to Thai relatives.

 

He does not associate being Thai at ALL, and will never admit to it or tell anyone he is.

 

He has zero interest in Thailand or anything else Thai. Thai girls no way!

 

Just recently back in Thailand for the first time in 6 years, he was in complete dismay and hated it. He said never again in this lifetime and he means it.

 

The kids he grew up with, still working in the fields in Isaan, most married with kids, have nothing. He has nothing to relate to with them anymore.

 

He was brought up to understand the importance of education, career, finance how to be able to be independent and earn what you want from life. 

 

Studyaholic. Likes being at the Uni and studying everything; being around other smart kids.

 

Sharp, bright kid. He knows he can be anything he wants to be with no limitations unlike his chances in Thailand.

 

We let him choose his own course and we know he will do fine.

 

Even though he was in one of the most expensive international schools in Thailand, he was still a year behind when we came back to the USA.

 

I feel like that motivated him to study harder and catch up to his age group quicker.

 

I marvel at everything he has accomplished in his short life already.

 

He will have a life where he can support a family, have a career and earn enough to pay for it all.

 

Most of all, he is very happy with his life and his opportunities.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Which just goes to show what a difference money and opportunity makes. Nothing against you, you did what you could to ensure your son got ahead. But more a comment on how for most Thais the odds are stacked against them from birth. 

 

Getting ahead in Thailand, let alone outside of thailand is for many impossible. Huge lack of social mobility. Massive wealth inequality. Not that this is unique to Thailand either though. 

Oh, many here with young children.  Rumak's is 30 , born in Chiangrai.  Was born after a 2 am

motorcycle ride on a dirt ride into town.  Now a PHD  from a Univ. in Canada.  Can speak and write in Thai as well.  A picture is worth a thousand words ?

 

On 1/1/2020 at 3:37 AM, bermondburi said:

Which just goes to show what a difference money and opportunity makes. Nothing against you, you did what you could to ensure your son got ahead. But more a comment on how for most Thais the odds are stacked against them from birth. 

 

Getting ahead in Thailand, let alone outside of thailand is for many impossible. Huge lack of social mobility. Massive wealth inequality. Not that this is unique to Thailand either though. 

I agree with you.

 

The mass majority of Thai people will never have anything.

 

Very sad to see.

On 1/1/2020 at 2:05 AM, Happy Grumpy said:

 

 

Which of the most expensive international schools in Thailand is situated among the fields of Isaan?

 

Thanks. 

Prem International in Chiang Mai

On 1/1/2020 at 3:36 AM, SkyFax said:

Well then maybe it's just me because I have in the past worked with some of the exceptional kids who, if they went to the US, might be a grade or 2 ahead of their fellow classmates instead of a grade or 2 behind.

How can you make a wild prediction IF and they MIGHT, when they never did?

 

Based on facts, you have none

 

If you think Thai students as a whole are on par with the first world, simply not true.

 

Have you been reading that all thai grades across the board are failing worse than ever?

 

 

Our son went to school in the UK when he was young at 12 we came back here ,went to an international school, then university ,worked for a neighbour of ours ,then a german company ,now at 26 is head of an  import export company ,speaks fluent Thai And English (with a local English accent) still in contact with his old friends from our street in England via the internet ,when home speaks both Thai and English ,like his mum he reads and writes English .

So has done ok ,oh also has a very nice girlfriend ,she is Thai ,speaks some English.

20 minutes ago, ivor bigun said:

Our son went to school in the UK when he was young at 12 we came back here ,went to an international school, then university ,worked for a neighbour of ours ,then a german company ,now at 26 is head of an  import export company ,speaks fluent Thai And English (with a local English accent) still in contact with his old friends from our street in England via the internet ,when home speaks both Thai and English ,like his mum he reads and writes English .

So has done ok ,oh also has a very nice girlfriend ,she is Thai ,speaks some English.

Good for him. sounds like he has made a real success of being both Thai and English (British). many would not bother with Thailand after an advantageous start like his, so kudos to him that he has.   

56 minutes ago, bwpage3 said:

Prem International in Chiang Mai

You think that's near the fields of Isaan?? 

 

????

2 minutes ago, Happy Grumpy said:

You think that's near the fields of Isaan?? 

 

????

You were the one claiming in the fields of Isaan

 

 

3 hours ago, bwpage3 said:

How can you make a wild prediction IF and they MIGHT, when they never did?

 

Based on facts, you have none

 

If you think Thai students as a whole are on par with the first world, simply not true.

 

Have you been reading that all thai grades across the board are failing worse than ever?

 

 

The only facts I have are 2 students in particular one with an overseas PhD and one with a law degree from UK both of whom I coached for Thai government scholarships and as I said that they are exceptional not the norm.

2 hours ago, bwpage3 said:

You were the one claiming in the fields of Isaan

 

Eh?

 

You:

 

Quote

The kids he grew up with, still working in the fields in Isaan

 

????

 

 

You're hilarious. ????