Living Here Gets Better for Some and Worse for Others - Why

[Silent Number]

10 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

I can thoroughly recommend "running away", when anything gets a little tough.

But your English we understand fully.

[Pravda]

2 hours ago, rumak said:

thank you for a bit of honesty.    I have been here almost 30 years,  and in my 30's riding our honda

wings around this new found disneyland (asian style)..... was indeed lots of fun.   

Then my forties.... married

then my fifties......... divorced.   but having "fun" again.  Oops, disillusionment starts to creep in : 

heck, those thai smiles and thai attitudes and thai figures all feel a little different. Yes, as OMF

points out...... things change

then my 60's.    uh oh    hansum man ain't so hansum anymore .   and every sweet grape I taste

somehow turns sour with time.   Not that fine wine that some would claim.

 

easy to talk positive stuff along the journey.   when you near the end ,  and no longer have the

energy to pursue your hobbies ... what then ? 

yes,  i too get a little more depressed as time passes .

 

  

Really nicely worded non arrogant post. 

 

Unlike the op

[1FinickyOne]

3 hours ago, rumak said:

and no longer have the

energy to pursue your hobbies ... what then ? 

There was a US Senator, many yrs ago, who said - 'you don't give things up because you get old - you get old because you give things up.' 

 

Not exactly true but a nice thought... I give up things because I am bored with them or don't have the energy to pursue and it just isn't much fun or is physically painful. I have led an indulgent life, followed my dreams often enough that I ran out of them. Then I started doing other people's dreams for them... my few remaining habits or hobbies don't hold the interest that much anymore at 70...

 

And on so many levels the world is increasingly depressing, if you follow the news. The world gets a bit crazier it seems every week. Before covid I remember taking my wife to the hospital and everyone wore a mask. It looked like an episode of the Twilight Zone... and when I was a kid watching that show I never would have imagined the world to be like it is now. The world seems like they put crazy in the water and too many people are drinking their fill, in addition I am seeing friends 'slip' a bit... and I have less patience for dementia's nasty side... and am less sociable... 

[1FinickyOne]

19 hours ago, BritManToo said:

one completely insane younger on the side works for me.

sure.. why not

[TigerandDog]

Those that have the attitude of the OP's friend will have that attitude regardless of where they live. The only time they are happy is when they are whingeing and whining about anything and everything, and that applies to numerous individuals on TVF.

[rumak]

1 hour ago, kenk24 said:

There was a US Senator, many yrs ago, who said - 'you don't give things up because you get old - you get old because you give things up.' 

 

Not exactly true but a nice thought... I give up things because I am bored with them or don't have the energy to pursue and it just isn't much fun or is physically painful. I have led an indulgent life, followed my dreams often enough that I ran out of them. Then I started doing other people's dreams for them... my few remaining habits or hobbies don't hold the interest that much anymore at 70...

 

And on so many levels the world is increasingly depressing, if you follow the news. The world gets a bit crazier it seems every week. Before covid I remember taking my wife to the hospital and everyone wore a mask. It looked like an episode of the Twilight Zone... and when I was a kid watching that show I never would have imagined the world to be like it is now. The world seems like they put crazy in the water and too many people are drinking their fill, in addition I am seeing friends 'slip' a bit... and I have less patience for dementia's nasty side... and am less sociable... 

i relate to what you say .   hate to admit it, but i have just hit that magic number (70) . jeeez !

Now i think of those young studs (lol)  like bm2 ,   only 64  , still playing the boom boom game.

well, being here for a long time I have had more than my share of hobbies and adventures.  It is

sad to know i can't go out and dig the earth like i used to,  or ride my bike for 50 km.... but i will

say i DO keep trying to do my best .   but it is not as easy to get myself into that mindset as it was

before.  Like you say,  the world being like a twilight zone episode also makes me withdraw even more.     One thing i can relate to,  is when i hear someone saying " heck, i still feel like a young

kid..... just trapped inside this old body ! "        and so it goes......................

 

 

[pineapple01]

Im Lucky, being miserable makes me Very Happy wherever i am.

[1FinickyOne]

10 minutes ago, pineapple01 said:

Im Lucky, being miserable makes me Very Happy wherever i am.

sure, I believe that - but what about everyone else? 

[EVENKEEL]

7 minutes ago, kenk24 said:

sure, I believe that - but what about everyone else? 

Not sure why we always have to be cheerful. It's not illegal to be grumpy, to all the fake smiling yahoos....bite me.

[rumak]

36 minutes ago, rumak said:

Now i think of those young studs (lol)  like bm2 ,   only 64 

note :   not meant in a mean way..... just good natured   ???? 

 

but i think he knows that 

[ianf]

On 8/8/2020 at 3:01 PM, BritManToo said:

Probably HER nice house.

Pretty much no woman wants a nice or caring man. They like scumbags.

Actually some predictably low grade replies here. But happily the house is secured and not in her name.

[GinBoy2]

5 hours ago, Pravda said:

Really nicely worded non arrogant post. 

 

Unlike the op

I don't think the OP, or his friend were arrogant in the least.

 

We're all different, have different desires for life. 

 

What I wanted 20, 15, 10 years ago may not be what I want today.

 

The OP's friend clearly feels trapped. Now thats something that afflicts many expats.

 

Now that can manifest in a couple of ways. They either descend into totally Thai hatred, or go into hyper defense of Thailand.

Either way it's pretty tragic.

 

The ones that survive are those that either truly like the place and the lifestyle, and those that can deal with the 'issues' but ultimately knowing they can leave and go home if they want to.

 

I've met quite a few in the former category. Both the haters and the over zealous are pretty tragic figures.

 

Thailand isn't for everyone. Those in the latter category, either tire of the place, want something different, maybe go back to be closer to family, the list goes on, but at the bottom line they can do it.

 

They guys that can stick it out, like the life, maybe not too exciting, but just like it. And especially as they get older, it tends to be those with Thai families who have no desire to leave Thailand

 

So the tragic ones are those that burnt bridges, and have that helpless trapped feeling, then they can go either way into the haters or apologists, the apologists trying justify to themselves mainly.

 

I'm always amazed about how many guys in their 50's, no language skills, you come across, who after a couple of trips to Thailand decide to sell up everything move to Thailand.

 

Recipe for disaster 

[DrTuner]

Quote

I wonder what factors make the difference?

Just out of curiosity .. your friend wouldn't happen to have to deal with Thai construction crews? That'll drive anyone mad. I've been battling with a poorly built plumbing system at our old house this weekend and am ready to murder half the population for the idiocies I've uncovered. Murrrrrrrrrrrrrrder.

[Silent Number]

2 hours ago, rumak said:

note :   not meant in a mean way..... just good natured   ???? 

 

but i think he knows that 

I usually play that song ...I think it was from a Clint Eastwood move ..”.Don’t let the old man in”

[Silent Number]

4 minutes ago, DrTuner said:

Just out of curiosity .. your friend wouldn't happen to have to deal with Thai construction crews? That'll drive anyone mad. I've been battling with a poorly built plumbing system at our old house this weekend and am ready to murder half the population for the idiocies I've uncovered. Murrrrrrrrrrrrrrder.

I give you a tip thy have no  idea what a P trap or an S bend is main reason bathrooms are smelly in Thailand

[GinBoy2]

4 minutes ago, DrTuner said:

Just out of curiosity .. your friend wouldn't happen to have to deal with Thai construction crews? That'll drive anyone mad. I've been battling with a poorly built plumbing system at our old house this weekend and am ready to murder half the population for the idiocies I've uncovered. Murrrrrrrrrrrrrrder.

Hmmm, plumbing is my big gripe.

 

I can think of, maybe, 3 events in my life prior to Thailand that involved burst water pipes.

 

I lost count in Thailand!

 

When you build a house you accept a veneer that they know what they are doing, but it's window dressing a lot of the time.

 

I remember going into my roof space and being appalled at the electrics. I got an electrician to actually come and sort out some of the chaos before it all burst into flames

[Silent Number]

2 hours ago, EVENKEEL said:

Not sure why we always have to be cheerful. It's not illegal to be grumpy, to all the fake smiling yahoos....bite me.

<deleted>

[DrTuner]

6 minutes ago, Silent Number said:

I give you a tip thy have no  idea what a P trap or an S bend is main reason bathrooms are smelly in Thailand

Oh I know. But you don't want to know what I found lurking under the house and in the downstairs ceilings. Trust me, you don't. You'd be waking up sweaty in the night screaming "KILL THEM ALL!!". 

 

It's a <deleted>ty job. Literally.

[rumak]

7 minutes ago, GinBoy2 said:

 

When you build a house you accept a veneer that they know what they are doing,

ahhhhh,  and therein lies the problem .   no ?     

 

as for the "oops, maybe I chose the wrong woman"  mantra      I think that could also

be a case of  not learning what is behind the veneer........ before building the house 

 

so, ultimately,  who is at fault ?

Edited August 9, 2020 by rumak

[bwpage3]

8 hours ago, OneMoreFarang said:

 

Sounds about right.

 

And in the meantime you write comments in a Thai forum and pretend you know about the current situation in Thailand. Yeah, sure.

I sure know a lot more than you.

 

It is called education.

[Silent Number]

25 minutes ago, GinBoy2 said:

Hmmm, plumbing is my big gripe.

 

I can think of, maybe, 3 events in my life prior to Thailand that involved burst water pipes.

 

I lost count in Thailand!

 

When you build a house you accept a veneer that they know what they are doing, but it's window dressing a lot of the time.

 

I remember going into my roof space and being appalled at the electrics. I got an electrician to actually come and sort out some of the chaos before it all burst into flames

Let me enlighten you a little about builders...In my country and probably yours to become a builder you must attend a T.A.F.E. College and pass written and practical tests whilst working as an apprentice for 3years with a certified builder then you get a certificate to hang up on your wall and a card licensed builder. In Thailand the procedure is.... Oops there is no procedure you are a builder because you say you are.  (phu kochung)
 

[DrTuner]

5 minutes ago, Silent Number said:

Let me enlighten you a little about builders...In my country and probably yours to become a builder you must attend a T.A.F.E. College and pass written and practical tests whilst working as an apprentice for 3years with a certified builder then you get a certificate to hang up on your wall and a card licensed builder. In Thailand the procedure is.... Oops there is no procedure you are a builder because you say you are.  (phu kochung)

And some will cry "Nanny State!" at that. I call it quality control. The lack of it in Thailand is enough to drive one into homicidal insanity. It's cute at first but you get tired of constantly spending your time fixing the mistakes of others.

 

It's like Don Quixote fighting an army of Somchais.

Edited August 9, 2020 by DrTuner

[CorpusChristie]

33 minutes ago, GinBoy2 said:

So the tragic ones are those that burnt bridges, and have that helpless trapped feeling, then they can go either way into the haters or apologists, the apologists trying justify to themselves mainly.

It can be beneficial, burning all bridges, relationships wise .

I dont have any close family or friends back home anymore .

Thus do not miss them or yearn to go back .

Yeah, could always go back to my hometown and go to the same pubs I used to go into when I was 20 years old and drink with all "my mates" who are still drinking in those same pubs , besides, I can talk to anyone live on FB , even from those same pubs, if I really wanted to .

  As I dont miss back home I dont yearn to go back there , and thus I am quite content living in Thailand and am neither a "hater" or "an apologist" , just happy and content living here and dont feel trapped at all

[Silent Number]

2 minutes ago, CorpusChristie said:

It can be beneficial, burning all bridges, relationships wise .

I dont have any close family or friends back home anymore .

Thus do not miss them or yearn to go back .

Yeah, could always go back to my hometown and go to the same pubs I used to go into when I was 20 years old and drink with all "my mates" who are still drinking in those same pubs , besides, I can talk to anyone live on FB , even from those same pubs, if I really wanted to .

  As I dont miss back home I dont yearn to go back there , and thus I am quite content living in Thailand and am neither a "hater" or "an apologist" , just happy and content living here and dont feel trapped at all

Took the words right outa my key board all the above applies to me also.I don’t understand this escape route mentality why lock yourself in in first place if you have that mindset.

[elliss]

17 hours ago, bwpage3 said:

Where is it much better than Thailand?

 

Seriously?

 

Thailand ranks #28 in the best countries to live, so the obvious answer is there are 27 better countries to live in.

 

      Would i be correct in saying , you can't  speak Thai ..

 

[bwpage3]

11 hours ago, wwest5829 said:

Well, since you asked ... People are paid at different amounts in the US. So, for example, a teacher in one of the Southeastern states in the US, is paid less, on average than teachers in many Northeastern states. Thank you for pointing out what should have been my financial ability at the time of retirement but, well everything does not go according to your "should have'. OK, my choice to remain in a lower paying state, also my choice to switch from the local secondary school system to help found and build the new local community college (at the time of retirement I would have earned $14K more a year had I stayed with the public school). Being in a lower paying state, that resulted in paying in lower Social Security/Medicare payments = lower monthly SS payments in retirement. As to Medicare, let us not forget the co-pays and deductions that are part of the system (I still pay my Medicare premiums although my earned benefits are not extended to medical coverage outside the US, unlike earned US military service coverage via Tri-care). No, not the entire US population is not moving outside the US at retirement but there are millions of working middle class Americans living outside the US and, in retirement, they find they can have, like myself, a working middle class retirement in a lower cost country (Americans are not alone in this). I'm thinking my $2200 USA a month (includes $1306 from SS) would not cover my current 4 bed, 3 bath home with yard, MB, car, food, utilities, various insurance, medical cost, etc. in the US. I and millions of others are thus outpaced by cost of living in the US and are financially able to live a comfortable life in Southeast Asia, the Philippines, or Latin America. That heart attack here in Thailand and resulting "mini-stroke"? With the weeklong international standards hospital stay, stent, two angioplasties ... all in was $11K USD. am I mistaken in thinking the bill would be much higher for the same care in the USA? Ah, yes, choices ... and the results of those choices. For me and many others ... much better to be outside the USA ...

At $2200 a month, you could certainly live in the USA.

 

Most people that work their entire lives have their house paid off, bills paid, off and can live off their retirement earnings.

 

Do you own the house in Thailand or was it your wife's?

 

How about the car? 

 

Do you have any children? What will you leave them? Nothing?

 

$11K out of pocket may sound like a good idea to you, but not compared to medicare. That was half a year's income.

 

As far as Americans retiring to other countries?

 

What percent of Americans out-priced themselves in the USA, versus worked and planned their entire lives to be able to live in their dream destination? 

 

The interesting thing, which I don't think you really address, is why is it that most people that move to Thailand get married to a Thai? You never really hear of any married couples moving to Thailand because it is such a wonderful place to retire to?

 

Did you move to Thailand solely to get married because Thai women will marry anyone, and it was a place you could afford?

 

There are plenty of countries within hours reach of the US you could live just fine on $2200 a month. 

 

Why go half way around the world? Something must have prompted you to Thailand?

 

The good weather? Sure if you like it smoking hot and humid, or monsoon rain 6 months out of the year. Floods, droughts, not my idea of good weather.

 

The food? No thanks to eating Thai food everyday the rest of my life.

 

Traffic? Accidents.

 

Baht rate? A slight shift if the baht rate means you wouldn't meet the minimum for a visa?

 

Air pollution?

 

Trash everywhere?

 

 

 

 

 

 

[elliss]

25 minutes ago, Silent Number said:

Let me enlighten you a little about builders...In my country and probably yours to become a builder you must attend a T.A.F.E. College and pass written and practical tests whilst working as an apprentice for 3years with a certified builder then you get a certificate to hang up on your wall and a card licensed builder. In Thailand the procedure is.... Oops there is no procedure you are a builder because you say you are.  (phu kochung)
 

 

     Thai,s   grow rice in the rice season .

       Out of season , they offer their services as , plumber, brickie,  spark , pilot , etc .

       

 

Edited August 9, 2020 by elliss

[CorpusChristie]

31 minutes ago, Silent Number said:

Let me enlighten you a little about builders...In my country and probably yours to become a builder you must attend a T.A.F.E. College and pass written and practical tests whilst working as an apprentice for 3years with a certified builder then you get a certificate to hang up on your wall and a card licensed builder. In Thailand the procedure is.... Oops there is no procedure you are a builder because you say you are.  (phu kochung)
 

Plus you have to get numerous certificates that need to be constantly updated .

[Silent Number]

10 minutes ago, bwpage3 said:

At $2200 a month, you could certainly live in the USA.

 

Most people that work their entire lives have their house paid off, bills paid, off and can live off their retirement earnings.

 

Do you own the house in Thailand or was it your wife's?

 

How about the car? 

 

Do you have any children? What will you leave them? Nothing?

 

$11K out of pocket may sound like a good idea to you, but not compared to medicare. That was half a year's income.

 

As far as Americans retiring to other countries?

 

What percent of Americans out-priced themselves in the USA, versus worked and planned their entire lives to be able to live in their dream destination? 

 

The interesting thing, which I don't think you really address, is why is it that most people that move to Thailand get married to a Thai? You never really hear of any married couples moving to Thailand because it is such a wonderful place to retire to?

 

Did you move to Thailand solely to get married because Thai women will marry anyone, and it was a place you could afford?

 

There are plenty of countries within hours reach of the US you could live just fine on $2200 a month. 

 

Why go half way around the world? Something must have prompted you to Thailand?

 

The good weather? Sure if you like it smoking hot and humid, or monsoon rain 6 months out of the year. Floods, droughts, not my idea of good weather.

 

The food? No thanks to eating Thai food everyday the rest of my life.

 

Traffic? Accidents.

 

Baht rate? A slight shift if the baht rate means you wouldn't meet the minimum for a visa?

 

Air pollution?

 

Trash everywhere?

 

 

 

 

 

 

Pageboy I think you have your countries mixed up that country you waffle on about is Cambodia isn’t it? Thailand suits some people including myself.No it isn’t perfect but I like a rural atmosphere so I live in the country area.i married a Thai National in my home country and after 2 1/2 years of travelling between both places I chose Thailand to retire. But I agree if you have a negative attitude toward the land or it’s rules and regulations or it’s inhabitants don’t stay your health and well-being may suffer if you do but man lighten up don’t beat up on people just because they find here pleasing to them it’s a life choice.Respect their choice as yours should be respected by them.

[bwpage3]

8 hours ago, Silent Number said:

Thank you deitys of all denominations for keeping them there. bw you need to lighten up man you waffle on  at some posts with such venom and downright rudeness which suggests you are miserable with your existence and angry at those who are content with theirs.Ok now go for it I’m braced and ready.

I write what I want, that is what the forum is for, people's opinions.

 

If you don't like them, don't read them and upset yourself.

 

Never really understood, unless it touches a personal nerve, why people get so upset reading other's responses?

 

Maybe you can enlighten us why it bothers you so much to make a personal attack?

 

Honestly you couldn't even carry my brief case. You will never achieve that kind of financial lifestyle.

 

So don't think for a minute I am miserable and try to prop yourself up because you have nothing.

 

You should have figured out a long time ago, that many in Thailand are not content for one reason or another.

 

Some that state they are content, how do you know unless you know them personally?

 

You seem to be the type of person that read "If the sky was falling" you would believe it.

 

You think every post on this forum is true?

 

I think you responded in the way you did because you are miserable