On a Septic Tank Truck sign:

"We're #1 in the #2 business."

Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:

"Dr. Jones, at your cervix."

At a Proctologist's door

"To expedite your visit please back in."

On a Plumber's truck:

"We repair what your husband fixed."

On a Plumber's truck:

"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."

Pizza Shop Slogan:

"7 days without pizza makes one weak."

At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee:

"Invite us to your next blowout."

On a Plastic Surgeon's Office door:

"Hello. Can we pick your nose?"

At a Towing company:

"We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."

On an Electrician's truck:

"Let us remove your shorts."

In a Nonsmoking Area:

"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate

action."

On a Maternity Room door:

"Push. Push. Push."

At an Optometrist's Office

"If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right

place."

On a Taxidermist's window:

"We really know our stuff."

In a Podiatrist's office:

"Time wounds all heels."

On a Fence:

"Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive."

At a Car Dealership:

"The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."

Outside a Muffler Shop:

"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."

In a Veterinarian's waiting room:

"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"

At the Electric Company:

"We would be delighted if you send in your payment.

However, if you don't, you will be."

In a Restaurant window:

"Don't stand there and be hungry, Come on in and get fed up."

In the front yard of a Funeral Home:

"Drive carefully. We'll wait."

At a Propane Filling Station,

"Tank heaven for little grills."

And don't forget the sign at a Chicago Radiator Shop:

"Best place in town to take a leak."

Sign with a picture of a rottweiler on a gate :

"I can get to this gate in 15 seconds - can you?"

works for me

Sign on a entrance gate to private yard.

"No Pucking

Farking"

very enjoyable ..... gave me a giggle before work

I was on a bike trip and saw this one over a biker bar in Billings, Montana:

"Hangovers installed and serviced here"

On the side of a builders van in the north of England.

Patel and Sing general builders.. You have tried the cowboys, now try the indians !!