British Man's Urgent Plea to Save Dying Father in Thailand

[riverhigh]

Personally, I am now fast approaching the 75+ group. The best option I see for his father is for him to die in his sleep. In view of his age and physical condition, the best years of his life are long gone. 

[Gecko123]

Can't recall a single instance where a gofundme appeal has received a sympathetic response on this forum. The comment section on threads like these seem to only bring out the misanthropic worst in people. If ASEANNOW thinks it is doing a community service by spreading awareness of people in need, fine, but maybe the comments section should be closed, if for no other reason than to spare the people dealing with hardship the pain of reading all the unkind comments.

[Brave-Fart]

1 hour ago, Bundooman said:

Through no fault of his, this young man is doing his best. It's not his fault yet he is desperately trying to help his father.

I wish him luck.

There may be someone out there wealthy and kind enough to help him.

However, probably like myself, most of us are on a controlled budget, and unable to help him financially.

Very sad,

If the young man was doing his best , then why did he not take action and fly his father back to the UK prior to conditions deteriorating. Why cant they contact all of their relatives and close friends or even apply for a personal loan . Why cant they or the son just fly his father back on the next available flight .

[NorthernRyland]

1 hour ago, Gaccha said:

"As things move forward following Friday's earthquake in Bangkok, things have also continued to be delayed in acquiring an answer from the UK embassy with regard to whether my dad would receive the care needed on arrival back in the UK on time and there is a concern over NHS waiting lists. The last thing I would want for him is to be repatriated back there, only to find he would be waiting for a year for treatment.

 

I wonder why the NHS is so backed up.... maybe it has something to do with people like his family flooding into the country over a short period of time?

[Peterphuket]

Getting seriously ill because of a wound on the foot, I can imagine, viruses and bacteria thrive in a hot and humid country, and you have to be very careful and treat them well, speaking from experience, never bare feet in shoes again, always wear socks.

[NorthernRyland]

23 minutes ago, Gecko123 said:

Can't recall a single instance where a gofundme appeal has received a sympathetic response on this forum. The comment section on threads like these seem to only bring out the misanthropic worst in people. If ASEANNOW thinks it is doing a community service by spreading awareness of people in need, fine, but maybe the comments section should be closed, if for no other reason than to spare the people dealing with hardship the pain of reading all the unkind comments.

 

It boggles the mind. AN knows the people here are like this and yet they promote these stories with donation links.

 

Remember not all of us here are British and this guy was probably a first generation immigrate to the UK. As an American I have less connection to him than my Thai neighbors so why are they promoting this on their platform instead of local stories? The logic seems to be we both speak English and we're in Thailand, therefore I should prefer to donate to him over a Thai person. Totally misguided if you ask me.

 

Put it on a UK travel blog or something but not an English-speaking expat forum which. That's why they get pushback here.

[ignore it]

Why is there the need for the medical transport?

 

Wheelchairs and pushers are a freebee.

 

I'm smelling a scambo.

[Kinok Farang]

1 hour ago, Baba Naba said:

Just in case anyone is interested....

 

 

So his Dad is a Mahatma Gandhi impersonator?That gig should pay pretty well with the amount of Indians in Pattaya.

[connda]

I find it funny that people seem to believe that old people should live forever.  77 is pretty much a full live-span.  When you get to be that age, something will kill you.  And yet people fight it to extend their poor quality of life longer than it should be extended.  My guess is that if the elderly gentleman manages to return to the UK, the NHS bureaucracy will kill him.  He'll probably die waiting for an appointment or an ambulance.  People with diabetes die of what start off as "minor" infections of their extremities even in the West. As much as Westerners love to slam Thai health services, they can and do care for conditions like these. But eventually all the care in the world isn't going to stop the inevitable. 
But?
The family will bankrupt themselves to return dad back to the UK where he'll die anyway leaving the family burdened with debt.

Really - I have a question for those folks who are now in their 70s or older and who live here in Thailand:  If you live in a country where you depend on socialized medicine and chose to retire in a location, such as Thailand, where you have to pay for your own healthcare and emergencies, why haven't you factored in contingencies for the eventuality of developing a life-threatening disease that can kill you?  Why don't you people plan for that - the older you get, the more likely it's gonna happen. 
For myself and a number of other like-minded expats (BritManToo for example, we are a minority), we have already excepted that we will eventually die in Thailand. Your body is going to break down, medical care will eventually just not cure you, and then you will eventually die. It's the way of life, life ends in death.   I've got a living will and the head-doctor at our Amphur hospital is a personal friend of the family and knows the wishes of both myself and my wife. It is natural for you to die in your 70s and 80s. Sure, some people live into their 90s and beyond. But your quality of life begins to really suck - why fight it?  When the time comes, when my body breaks down and become irreparable, I want to be kept as comfortable as possible and be allowed to check out of this body on my own terms. I'm at peace with that.

What I don't have is any desire to be med-evacuated back to my home country in a journey paid for by GoFundMe donations and the life-savings of my children and family.  Why?  My life and my family is here in Thailand.  Also, for those who want to be sent back to their home countries where they receive state socialized medicine - you could have purchase med-evacuation insurance!  It does exist.  If people wish to extend their lives as long as possible and desire to be "shipped back home to receive the best socialized medicine," then why didn't you prepare for that eventuality - because it WILL eventually happen. Not preparing is irresponsible.  How many AN members are going to do the exact same thing when their bodies final break down and death starts to tap you on the shoulder and remind you that this stay in Thailand and on this Earth is only temporary. How many of you people even bother to think about this - cause is will happen.  Guaranteed.  100%. 

"Hello my friend.  Did you plan?  Are you ready?  I am coming for you - maybe today, maybe tomorrow, maybe next week, but I will gather you up and take you away because that body you inhabit?  It doesn't last forever no matter how much money you have, or how much status, or how much power.  It's just a body, and when it finally breaks down for the last time - well, I'll be seeing ya!" 

[hkblademan]

NHS should charge him for treatment. He hasn’t lived in UK for 8 years. Sure family can get him back and cover it. Why should tax payers fund his bad life choices.

[Patong2021]

3 hours ago, J Branche said:

Wait. So you want others to pay the equivalent of 1.5 million baht to 2.5 million baht to transport him to the UK. Top Hospitals in Bangkok can treat him and I'm just guessing but I think it would be cheaper.  

 

I will never understand the I'm going to wing it and make high risk decisions and if things go wrong some hero will step in to save me Mindset.  

He  obviously does not ahve the money to pay for his treatment in Thailand and is hoping that if. the man is brought back to the UK as an indigent, that the UK taxpayers will take care of the  cost of care, and the NHS will be obliged to provide the nursing and palliative care.

 

It sucks to be poor. And this is a  potent reminder that Thailand is not a  viable long term solution for older  people of limited financial means. They almost always end up in bad shape, trapped.

[connda]

20 hours ago, snoop1130 said:

"My priority is my dad's health," says Jonathan, highlighting the urgent need for proper medical evaluations and treatments in the UK.

Like the ICU nurse whose face got totaled in a motorcycle accident, the trope that Thailand's health care is substandard is just that - a trope. I fully expect that if the son gets dad back to the US, he'll succumb under the care of the NHS.  Regarding the British Embassy not being responsive to his father medical condition?  It's not the job of the embassies of countries to provide care for their expats or even to facilitate the care of their expats.  It's the expat's responsibility to plan ahead of time and make arrangements for emergencies and the eventuality of their eventual sickness and death. To be blunt, if you can't do that, you shouldn't live here. If you depend on socialized medicine, they stay in your own country where you're safe and cared for by the State.

My advice to the son:  Your dad is a very sick man.  All beings who have life eventually fall into sickness and then death. It's the way of this world.  Take the time to make his remaining time on Earth as good as it can be considering his condition.  Develop acceptance and plan for his death.  It's gonna happen.  Spend your remaining time bonding with your dad and then help him in his last days as a loving son. Develop acceptance. Both of you.

[NorthernRyland]

25 minutes ago, hkblademan said:

NHS should charge him for treatment. He hasn’t lived in UK for 8 years. Sure family can get him back and cover it. Why should tax payers fund his bad life choices.

That guy looks like he's been sleeping on the beach the whole 8 years and utterly destitute, no wonder he got a foot infection. He may have dementia or something. Doesn't right this could happen.

[dddave]

19 hours ago, nick supreme said:

The treatment for Addison’s disease are proper drugs which I'm sure are available in Thailand. 

I had a severe staff infection in my foot a few years ago.  The municipal hospital I was initially at didn't stock any of the very powerful antibiotics needed for such an infection.  They tried to trick me into authorizing amputation.  Fortunately, a Thai friend helped me get out of that hospital.  It took a precious day and dozens of phone calls but we finally found a hospital that had VANCOMYCIN in their pharmacy.  Vancomycin is one of the most powerful and effective antibiotics against Staff infection.  It was touch and go but after 4 days of IV treatment, the infection receded and I was able to keep my foot.  

[impulse]

17 minutes ago, connda said:

Regarding the British Embassy not being responsive to his father medical condition?  It's not the job of the embassies of countries to provide care for their expats or even to facilitate the care of their expats. 

 

The way I read it is that the son is asking the embassy whether his father will qualify for NHS care if he does get him back to the UK.  That seems like a reasonable request for information from the embassy.  They should be well versed in issues like that which affect their citizens abroad.

 

I wish the family well.

 

[Middle Aged Grouch]

Why don't the Brits protest ? Their leaders after all are handing out millions and soon a billion if not more to Ukraine in ca$h or arms. Surely it's time now to take care of their own in first ? Or not ?

[Cabradelmar]

Yet, Thailand has everyone conned that their medical capabilities are 1st class (hub of medical tourism). Can't have it both ways. If a Thai who relo to UK wants to brings his Thai dad to UK for treatment, that's a testament to Thai medical capabilities. Then again if it's not plastic surgery, maybe Thai medical capabilities really are not all that.  Else, this is just a halfbaked sob story.

[connda]

4 hours ago, newbee2022 said:

Oh NO, another one with insufficient health care and funds.

But hey, why not go for other people's money?

He came to Thailand for retirement? Could have saved 300£/month easily.

This would be now enough (40.000£ probably) to take a fly wherever he wants.

No need for any donation at all.

"He came to Thailand for retirement? Could have saved 300£/month easily.

This would be now enough (40.000£ probably) to take a fly wherever he wants."

He wouldn't have to.  Med-Evacuation insurance costs between 300 to 600 GBP annually.  Like I said, people come here and don't plan. If I lived in a country with socialized medicine and chose to retire in a place like Thailand, I'd definitely have Med-Evacuation insurance in order to get me back to my home for medical care if I thought local health care was  substandard or if I had no other means of insurance.  Really.... elderly folk who have chose to retire here... a serous question for you: if you really believe Thai health care is substandard - why the hell are you living here in the first place!  What's your plan if you need "quality health care."   You should have either stayed home where you can receive what you perceive as top-tiered health care, or you should have retired to a place where there is - in your own mind - top-tiered health care. By the way, I consider the health care here to be very good even in the government hospitals. 

I should probably start an AseanNow poll.  I'd really like to know how many AN members have actually seriously planned for major health care needs, especially their own eventually demise and the care they will need during the process of their body breaking down and dying.  That would be an interesting poll. Knowing Westerner's aversion to death and dying in general, I'd bet most just ignore it.

Here's some interesting questions to ponder from our beloved Expat Community:
First - how many of the elderly expat retirees here ignore the fact they will eventually die?
Second - how many of the elderly expat retirees here ignore the fact that their body will eventually get sick, deteriorate, and die?
Third - how many of the elderly expat retirees here have a plan to handle their eventual sickness and then death?
Fourth - for those who come from a country with socialize medicine, how many purchase annual Med-Evac insurance to get them back home instead of waiting for the inevitable and then starting a GoFundMe page instead - or - have an insurance policy with a Med-Evac rider?
Fifth - do you actually believe it's your foreign office and embassy's responsibility to help assist you solve your health care emergencies when you failed to do the due diligence and plan for them yourself?

[couchpotato]

Personally I don't believe in 'Go Fund Me' requests. If people don't have the means to take care of themselves during good times and bad, they really shouldn't be here..don't put their plight onto others. IMHO.

 

Also the person this thread is about, looks far to sick and feeble to be flown anywhere, and should be taken care of here for as long as he's got. This is sad but there is a time when people just have to let go. Once again IMHO.

[Liverpool Lou]

6 hours ago, smedly said:

come to Thailand and take him home, what is the issue ?

The cost of a medical evacuation flight, as the OP clearly stated.

[Liverpool Lou]

4 hours ago, newbee2022 said:

You mean grabbing money!

No one is grabbing your money, or anyone else's.

[Liverpool Lou]

4 hours ago, newbee2022 said:

...and you agree with #gofundme ?

What's wrong with asking for money to help in an emergency situation, no one is being forced, are they?

[J Branche]

3 hours ago, Lopburikid said:

I had and still have medical insurance B4,000,000 cover. I was told by the insurance company that they pay the hospital directly. After 3 days in hospital the bill was B25,000. Hospital said the insurance has refused to pay. My wife called the company and asked why? They said we have to pay first and claim it back.  we had the money to pay. so we did. put a claim in, took 3 months to get B23,000 back. We had to pay B2,000 for the service. Never trust a Thai insurance company. The sole purpose of having medical insurance is if there is a medical emergency, the funds are there to cover it.

I read the policy of mine, paid and policy stated Insurance had X days to investigate and pay, then clause they had 3 months to pay for (insert any reason here).  I think it took about 50 days.  I think it needs to be mandatory that a broker must educate the basic process or how a claim is processed and decision rendered to a client.

[Liverpool Lou]

4 hours ago, Wuvu2 said:

I plan to be stoic and accept the aging process with grace. If I chicken out I'll be posting my go-fund-me page right here 😂

No you won't, GFMs cannot be made from Thailand!

[Liverpool Lou]

4 hours ago, newbee2022 said:

Yesterday I got a <deleted> storm when I named this #gofundme action as BEGGING.

But it is nothing else !!!

So what?  Are the beneficiaries saying that it is something else?

[Liverpool Lou]

4 hours ago, NorthernRyland said:

 

Exactly. Give me 10 minutes and I'll find a Thai person in which 40k pounds would be a life changer for their family and help their young children get ahead. Giving that dying old man (look at his legs ffs) the money would be a waste of money.

That's why you're not compelled to give.. No harm in a bit of compassion, though.

[connda]

4 hours ago, Scouse123 said:

The British Embassy will not pay for a medical evacuation to the UK, no matter how ill he is.

 

They are dreaming, if they think they can put this on the toes of the British Embassy.

 

It's got nothing to do with the Embassy being busy with recent earthquakes in Thailand.

 

They don't do these things, it is not in the consular remit.

 

Now they might scape up a bag of oranges and some Vitamin tablets at a push.......

If China decides to repatriate Taiwan, and a NATO-led "coalition of the willing" chooses to get involved in a hot-war, what will come into the consular remit is the transportation of UK citizens (and for other Western countries, the evacuation of their own citizens from the hot-zone in Thailand if it actually goes hot), although first they will issue a travel advisory for their citizens to get on the first plane out of Dodge. Evacuating their citizens is a Geo-political Brownie Point and shows "they care."  They don't really, but it looks good. They'd much rather their citizens to leave under their own power and on their own dime. 

[connda]

4 hours ago, newbee2022 said:

...and you agree with #gofundme ?

I don't have any problems with people setting up Go Fund Me campaigns if they feel an need.  No one is forcing those donating to help.  People don't have to give anything.  Up to them!

[robz]

3 hours ago, Baba Naba said:

I concur. He is not hooked up to any machines so he could fly with an assistant... 

 

 

But that foot needs to be removed NOW!!!

 

 

Terrible, right, that amputation has to happen immediately.

Every hospital (especially public ones) is obligated to provide assistance in life-threatening emergencies – even without immediate payment.

 

[crazykopite]

Let papa enjoy his last days your letting your heart rule your head your dad has been in Thailand since 2017 there is absolutely no guarantee that he will even get immediate treatment if you do get him back at some stage we all reach the time when we have to depart this world when my time comes I will go out gracefully I’m 74 years young I’ve enjoyed my life but the day will come when it’s my time to say goodbye  I have left instructions do not resuscitate ! My thoughts are with your paps, keep him comfortable give him the medication needed and allow him to go when he decides enough is enough