America Is Already Great Innit Mates

[Lewie London]

I keep hearing these red-hatted muppets waffling on like America’s gone down the bog, when truth is, the only thing circling the drain is their grasp on reality. Every one of ‘em’s convinced there’s some secret underground war goin’ on between Trump and the Deep State, like he’s Batman and the Democrats are hiding in the sewers with Nancy Pelosi dressed as the Joker. You can’t even queue for a coffee without one of these loons whispering that George Soros controls the weather and Hunter Biden’s laptop’s got the secret plans for the next pandemic scribbled in Microsoft Paint.

 

Mate, I asked one of ‘em what time it was, and he goes, “Time to wake up, the storm is coming.” I says, “Nah, bruv, I meant the actual time, not your bloody QAnon bedtime story.” They talk about that Hunter laptop like it’s the Ark of the Covenant. No one’s even seen the sodding thing, but apparently it’s got everything from nuclear codes to Hillary Clinton’s horcruxes stored on it. One lad told me he watched a YouTube vid that proves Biden ain’t real, just a bunch of CGI deep fakes stitched together by lizard Democrats and edited by Antifa interns on TikTok.

 

Speaking of Antifa, half these geezers reckon there’s a secret leftist militia hiding in vegan cafés, waiting to overthrow Texas with soy milk and pronouns. I met a bloke in a shooting range shirt who said Hillary Clinton runs a child trafficking ring out the back of a Pizza Hut. I asked him if he even knows how pizza works and he goes, “It’s all symbolism, mate, do your research.” Yeah alright pal, I’ll research a padded cell for the lot of you. And they all still bang on about them missing Hillary emails like they’re holding the last Horcrux. Newsflash: no one cares about your aunt’s forwarded chain letter from 2016.

 

The lot of ‘em think Trump’s still secretly president, ruling from a golden bunker under Mar-a-Lago and sending coded messages through discount T-shirts. “Trust the plan,” they keep saying, but the only plan I see is them getting conned into buying more merch while he pisses about playing golf. One of ‘em had a meltdown in the post office ‘cos they thought the new stamps were encoded with Chinese spyware. And don’t even mention vaccines. They think Bill Gates put microchips in the jab so he can track them—like Microsoft gives a toss what Jeff from Arkansas had for tea.

 

Then there’s the lot who reckon JFK Jr’s coming back from the dead to run with Trump on the next ticket. I says, “You’re confusing politics with The Walking Dead.” Bloke looks me dead in the eye and says, “That’s what they want you to think.” It’s always “they,” innit. “They” faked the moon landing, “they” control the media, “they” made you fail Year 9 Maths. Maybe “they” just need you to log off Facebook and go touch some grass.

 

So yeah, America’s already great. It’s just being held hostage by a bunch of loons who think George Soros is hiding in their fridge, that Hunter Biden’s laptop caused inflation, and that every time the wind blows it’s ‘cos Hillary farted in the direction of freedom. The only deep state here is the deep denial they’re all living in.

[Felton Jarvis]

Great post. You nailed it!!!

[StandardIssue]

Watch out, those lefties gonna get ya! They're gonna jump out of those vegan cafe's throwing fried tofu!

[frank83628]

And that people, is why you shouldn't drink early on a sunday and use the internet.

 

[Yellowtail]

Another know-nothing leftist going on about nothing. 

[BLMFem]

Great post, Mr. Lewie London!😄

[Harrisfan]

2 hours ago, Lewie London said:

I keep hearing these red-hatted muppets waffling on like America’s gone down the bog, when truth is, the only thing circling the drain is their grasp on reality. Every one of ‘em’s convinced there’s some secret underground war goin’ on between Trump and the Deep State, like he’s Batman and the Democrats are hiding in the sewers with Nancy Pelosi dressed as the Joker. You can’t even queue for a coffee without one of these loons whispering that George Soros controls the weather and Hunter Biden’s laptop’s got the secret plans for the next pandemic scribbled in Microsoft Paint.

 

Mate, I asked one of ‘em what time it was, and he goes, “Time to wake up, the storm is coming.” I says, “Nah, bruv, I meant the actual time, not your bloody QAnon bedtime story.” They talk about that Hunter laptop like it’s the Ark of the Covenant. No one’s even seen the sodding thing, but apparently it’s got everything from nuclear codes to Hillary Clinton’s horcruxes stored on it. One lad told me he watched a YouTube vid that proves Biden ain’t real, just a bunch of CGI deep fakes stitched together by lizard Democrats and edited by Antifa interns on TikTok.

 

Speaking of Antifa, half these geezers reckon there’s a secret leftist militia hiding in vegan cafés, waiting to overthrow Texas with soy milk and pronouns. I met a bloke in a shooting range shirt who said Hillary Clinton runs a child trafficking ring out the back of a Pizza Hut. I asked him if he even knows how pizza works and he goes, “It’s all symbolism, mate, do your research.” Yeah alright pal, I’ll research a padded cell for the lot of you. And they all still bang on about them missing Hillary emails like they’re holding the last Horcrux. Newsflash: no one cares about your aunt’s forwarded chain letter from 2016.

 

The lot of ‘em think Trump’s still secretly president, ruling from a golden bunker under Mar-a-Lago and sending coded messages through discount T-shirts. “Trust the plan,” they keep saying, but the only plan I see is them getting conned into buying more merch while he pisses about playing golf. One of ‘em had a meltdown in the post office ‘cos they thought the new stamps were encoded with Chinese spyware. And don’t even mention vaccines. They think Bill Gates put microchips in the jab so he can track them—like Microsoft gives a toss what Jeff from Arkansas had for tea.

 

Then there’s the lot who reckon JFK Jr’s coming back from the dead to run with Trump on the next ticket. I says, “You’re confusing politics with The Walking Dead.” Bloke looks me dead in the eye and says, “That’s what they want you to think.” It’s always “they,” innit. “They” faked the moon landing, “they” control the media, “they” made you fail Year 9 Maths. Maybe “they” just need you to log off Facebook and go touch some grass.

 

So yeah, America’s already great. It’s just being held hostage by a bunch of loons who think George Soros is hiding in their fridge, that Hunter Biden’s laptop caused inflation, and that every time the wind blows it’s ‘cos Hillary farted in the direction of freedom. The only deep state here is the deep denial they’re all living in.

Blah blah

[Lacessit]

5 minutes ago, Harrisfan said:

Blah blah

Better than anything you have ever posted.

[Lacessit]

"Hillary farted in the direction of freedom.". Priceless.

[Terrance8812]

This is great, but the irony in all this with Trumpers is that, for all their idiotic cultist conspiracy beliefs, they can’t pause for even a second to laugh at themselves. What a tremendous pity.

[fredwiggy]

7 minutes ago, Terrance8812 said:

This is great, but the irony in all this with Trumpers is that, for all their idiotic cultist conspiracy beliefs, they can’t pause for even a second to laugh at themselves. What a tremendous pity.

It all comes from defending yourself from others who are telling the truth.

[EVENKEEL]

Always been great. Always will.

[Etaoin Shrdlu]

10 minutes ago, EVENKEEL said:

Always been great. Always will.

 

Exactly.

 

And those who say "make America great again" are implying it isn't great now.

 

What losers!

[BKKKevin]

 A gallon of gas is down to a $buck 88!...

We're on the right track... 

[BLMFem]

11 minutes ago, EVENKEEL said:

Always been great. Always will.

So MAGA is a fallacy then?

[EVENKEEL]

7 minutes ago, BLMFem said:

So MAGA is a fallacy then?

Whatever floats your boat sister. 

[connda]

bob smith has a new incarnation!  100%

[KhunLA]

Maybe MAGA should be ... MAAA

... Make America Affordable Again

 

USA is great, if you already own your final home, and can still afford the RE taxes, and manage your health.   Or your income is $100,000 a year as a single person.  $200k if married & $300k if wanting children ... 

[BLMFem]

14 minutes ago, KhunLA said:

Maybe MAGA should be ... MAAA

 

What about BAAAA?

[Fat is a type of crazy]

21 minutes ago, connda said:

bob smith has a new incarnation!  100%

Bob couldn't write this. He loves him some Trump too. 

[KhunLA]

8 minutes ago, BLMFem said:

What about BAAAA?

Are you a US citizen and or live in the USA ?

 

Guessing you are with the username 'BLM F'em'

[Harrisfan]

1 hour ago, Lacessit said:

Better than anything you have ever posted.

Yeah sure Trump hater.

[short-Timer]

6 minutes ago, Harrisfan said:

Yeah sure Trump hater.

 

Oh, look, the the oversized snowflake is triggered when someone doesn't do nicey-nicey with his man god. 

[BLMFem]

33 minutes ago, EVENKEEL said:

Whatever floats your boat sister. 

I was asking a question, not floating boats.

But your deflection is noted.

[Harrisfan]

11 minutes ago, KhunLA said:

Are you a US citizen and or live in the USA ?

 

Guessing you are with the username 'BLM F'em'

Ladyboy in Pattaya.

[Harrisfan]

1 hour ago, Lacessit said:

"Hillary farted in the direction of freedom.". Priceless.

Smarter than anything you said 

[BLMFem]

34 minutes ago, connda said:

bob smith has a new incarnation!  100%

Who is this Bob you're speaking of? I've been called "Bob" by a couple of posters so I assume you're searching for his reincarnation.

Why is that - do you miss him?

[BLMFem]

14 minutes ago, KhunLA said:

Are you a US citizen and or live in the USA ?

 

Guessing you are with the username 'BLM F'em'

I could say your guess is as good as mine but that wouldn't really be telling the truth.

[KhunLA]

3 minutes ago, Harrisfan said:

Ladyboy in Pattaya.

Haven't a clue, depends if avatar is self or not.  Which also askes ...

BLM F'm ... the BLM movement

BLM F'm ... the PoPo or, complete unrelated to BLM - black lives matter BS

[Harrisfan]

1 minute ago, KhunLA said:

Haven't a clue, depends if avatar is self or not.  Which also askes ...

BLM F'm ... the BLM movement

BLM F'm ... the PoPo or, complete unrelated to BLM - black lives matter BS

It talks like a ladyboy.