“Billions and Billions” — And Other Fallacies from the Trumpnomics Book of Fables

[Lewie London]

So I’m sittin’ on a red baht bus headin’ up toward Doi Suthep, tryin’ to enjoy me takeaway container of mango n' sticky rice in peace, when I hear this bloke across from me in a faded MAGA visor shoutin’ into his phone like he’s negotiatin’ a hostage release. “Trump always wins,” he’s sayin’ to his mate. “Biden’s soft, but Trump? Trump stood up to them there Chai-kneeeeez!”

 

Mate, stood up to the Chinese? The only thing he stood up for was a second scoop of ice cream while Beijing handed him his own arse on a silk plate. “He made them pay tariffs!” the bloke goes. Right. And I’m the governor of the Bank of England.

 

Let’s jog the memory, yeah? Trump swore up and down them tariffs were gonna make America rich again. Said there’d be so many billions comin’ in, they’d cancel income tax altogether. “No more tax on your overtime, no tax on your tips, no tax on your Social Security,” he said, like Santa on a ket bender. Billions and billions, he said. Rivers of Chinese yuan flowin’ straight into every American’s wallet. You lot were meant to be rubbin’ shoulders with the Rothschilds by now.

 

What actually happened? Farmers needed immediate bailouts. Prices gone up at Walmart. American companies are payin' the tariffs, not China. Trump taxed his own people, calls it victory, then needed to subsidise the damage with government cheese and bad vibes. That’s not a trade war win, that’s a circular firing squad with a campaign hat.

 

And now? What’s he doin’? Quietly droppin’ the tariff talk. Caved faster than a budget noodle stand in monsoon season. Suddenly there’s no more chinwag about scrappin’ income tax or livin’ off the fat of Chinese surrender money. Now it’s just, “Elect me and we’ll see what happens.” See what happens? I did that once with a dodgy massage and a seafood buffet. Never again.

 

Trump’s economic plan was basically a wish sandwich, two fat promises with nothin’ in the middle. And when it all flopped, he just moved the goalposts like he was playin’ quidditch on a golf course. One minute it’s tariffs make you rich, next minute it’s tariffs are punishment, now it’s “I’ll negotiate a better deal” like we all forgot the last one ended with soybeans and despair.

 

So I turns to the MAGA bloke, who’s now wipin’ Pad Thai sauce off his chest like it’s battle paint, and I says, “If Trump’s always winnin’, why do Americans look like they’re losin’ a game they didn’t even know they were playin’?” He blinked like someone just unplugged his VPN.

 

You wanna get rich off tariffs? Better off buyin’ scratch-offs with your rent money. At least the lottery doesn’t pretend it’s got a plan.

 

Trump’s “winning”? Mate, if this is winnin’, I’d hate to see what losin’ looks like.

 

And let’s not forget the other golden ticket, yeah? The big patriotic promise: tariffs will bring back American manufacturing. Rust Belt reborn, steel mills fired up, coal miners dancin’ in the streets with MAGA hard hats on. A whole nation of welders and factory lads punchin’ clocks and buildin’ dreams, right?

 

Except, where is it? I mean, seriously. Where’s this industrial renaissance? Last time I checked, the only thing made in America with any consistency was political grift and prescription opioids.

 

Trump said tariffs would force companies to move production back to the States. Turns out, companies just moved production somewhere else. Vietnam, Mexico, even back to China through backdoor routes. If Trump’s plan was to make America the middleman for its own supply chain, he bloody nailed it.

 

You can’t bring back manufacturing just by slappin’ fees on imports and shoutin’ about it from a gold toilet. You need infrastructure, education, workforce development, training, investment, raw materials, and long-term planning. But Trump’s idea of a ten-year plan is whatever fits on a rally hat.

 

And now he’s droppin’ the tariffs anyway. So no tax cuts, no trade war billions, no jobs revival. No nothin’. Just a buncha empty slogans echoing around an Ohio warehouse that’s now a pickleball court.

 

I turns back to MAGA man, who’s now scrollin’ Truth Social like he’s searchin’ for a purpose, and I says, “So how’s that whole Made in America thing workin’ out for ya?” He muttered somethin’ about ‘deep state sabotage’ and changed the subject to Hunter Biden’s laptop and Hillary's emails.

 

Mate, you were promised factories and fortunes. What you got was foam fingers, fake hats, and a tariff hangover with no paracetamol.

 

You want to bring back manufacturing? Try electin’ someone who knows what a supply chain is and doesn’t think ‘reshoring’ is somethin’ you do with golf clubs.

 

Because at this rate, the only thing America’s producing is conspiracy theories, reality stars, and broken promises, all proudly made in the USA. So there you have it, done and dusted, lads. 

[xylophone]

You might want to add this to your excellent post........

 

[Lacessit]

There's a video somewhere on YouTube of a MAGA supporter with obligatory cap being interviewed on the subject of tariffs, and quite adamant the tariff is being paid by China.

 

As they say, you can't fix stupid.

[newbee2022]

38 minutes ago, Lewie London said:

So I’m sittin’ on a red baht bus headin’ up toward Doi Suthep, tryin’ to enjoy me takeaway container of mango n' sticky rice in peace, when I hear this bloke across from me in a faded MAGA visor shoutin’ into his phone like he’s negotiatin’ a hostage release. “Trump always wins,” he’s sayin’ to his mate. “Biden’s soft, but Trump? Trump stood up to them there Chai-kneeeeez!”

 

Mate, stood up to the Chinese? The only thing he stood up for was a second scoop of ice cream while Beijing handed him his own arse on a silk plate. “He made them pay tariffs!” the bloke goes. Right. And I’m the governor of the Bank of England.

 

Let’s jog the memory, yeah? Trump swore up and down them tariffs were gonna make America rich again. Said there’d be so many billions comin’ in, they’d cancel income tax altogether. “No more tax on your overtime, no tax on your tips, no tax on your Social Security,” he said, like Santa on a ket bender. Billions and billions, he said. Rivers of Chinese yuan flowin’ straight into every American’s wallet. You lot were meant to be rubbin’ shoulders with the Rothschilds by now.

 

What actually happened? Farmers needed immediate bailouts. Prices gone up at Walmart. American companies are payin' the tariffs, not China. Trump taxed his own people, calls it victory, then needed to subsidise the damage with government cheese and bad vibes. That’s not a trade war win, that’s a circular firing squad with a campaign hat.

 

And now? What’s he doin’? Quietly droppin’ the tariff talk. Caved faster than a budget noodle stand in monsoon season. Suddenly there’s no more chinwag about scrappin’ income tax or livin’ off the fat of Chinese surrender money. Now it’s just, “Elect me and we’ll see what happens.” See what happens? I did that once with a dodgy massage and a seafood buffet. Never again.

 

Trump’s economic plan was basically a wish sandwich, two fat promises with nothin’ in the middle. And when it all flopped, he just moved the goalposts like he was playin’ quidditch on a golf course. One minute it’s tariffs make you rich, next minute it’s tariffs are punishment, now it’s “I’ll negotiate a better deal” like we all forgot the last one ended with soybeans and despair.

 

So I turns to the MAGA bloke, who’s now wipin’ Pad Thai sauce off his chest like it’s battle paint, and I says, “If Trump’s always winnin’, why do Americans look like they’re losin’ a game they didn’t even know they were playin’?” He blinked like someone just unplugged his VPN.

 

You wanna get rich off tariffs? Better off buyin’ scratch-offs with your rent money. At least the lottery doesn’t pretend it’s got a plan.

 

Trump’s “winning”? Mate, if this is winnin’, I’d hate to see what losin’ looks like.

 

And let’s not forget the other golden ticket, yeah? The big patriotic promise: tariffs will bring back American manufacturing. Rust Belt reborn, steel mills fired up, coal miners dancin’ in the streets with MAGA hard hats on. A whole nation of welders and factory lads punchin’ clocks and buildin’ dreams, right?

 

Except, where is it? I mean, seriously. Where’s this industrial renaissance? Last time I checked, the only thing made in America with any consistency was political grift and prescription opioids.

 

Trump said tariffs would force companies to move production back to the States. Turns out, companies just moved production somewhere else. Vietnam, Mexico, even back to China through backdoor routes. If Trump’s plan was to make America the middleman for its own supply chain, he bloody nailed it.

 

You can’t bring back manufacturing just by slappin’ fees on imports and shoutin’ about it from a gold toilet. You need infrastructure, education, workforce development, training, investment, raw materials, and long-term planning. But Trump’s idea of a ten-year plan is whatever fits on a rally hat.

 

And now he’s droppin’ the tariffs anyway. So no tax cuts, no trade war billions, no jobs revival. No nothin’. Just a buncha empty slogans echoing around an Ohio warehouse that’s now a pickleball court.

 

I turns back to MAGA man, who’s now scrollin’ Truth Social like he’s searchin’ for a purpose, and I says, “So how’s that whole Made in America thing workin’ out for ya?” He muttered somethin’ about ‘deep state sabotage’ and changed the subject to Hunter Biden’s laptop and Hillary's emails.

 

Mate, you were promised factories and fortunes. What you got was foam fingers, fake hats, and a tariff hangover with no paracetamol.

 

You want to bring back manufacturing? Try electin’ someone who knows what a supply chain is and doesn’t think ‘reshoring’ is somethin’ you do with golf clubs.

 

Because at this rate, the only thing America’s producing is conspiracy theories, reality stars, and broken promises, all proudly made in the USA. So there you have it, done and dusted, lads. 

Thank you again to show us potus' Janus head.

Just one thing more.

You can buy a watch (wrist) with Trump's signature on it. They are going for around 700 Dollar.

Now the surprise.

When you got it home you'll realize a tiny bit of mistake. The (Chinese) company forgot the "T". Just a misprint.

Now it's only "RUMP". 

What do you think about it?🥰

[SunnyinBangrak]

2 hours ago, Lacessit said:

There's a video somewhere on YouTube of a MAGA supporter with obligatory cap being interviewed on the subject of tariffs, and quite adamant the tariff is being paid by China.

 

As they say, you can't fix stupid.

So the Thai 300% customs on importing US made cars is paid by who exactly? If your bluster is correct it's paid by America.  Liberal logic on full display😅

[jvs]

8 minutes ago, SunnyinBangrak said:

2 hours ago, Lacessit said:

There's a video somewhere on YouTube of a MAGA supporter with obligatory cap being interviewed on the subject of tariffs, and quite adamant the tariff is being paid by China.

 

As they say, you can't fix stupid.

So the Thai 300% customs on importing US made cars is paid by who exactly? If your bluster is correct it's paid by America.  Liberal logic on full display😅

As they say,you can't fix stupid.

 

[BLMFem]

19 minutes ago, SunnyinBangrak said:

So the Thai 300% customs on importing US made cars is paid by who exactly? If your bluster is correct it's paid by America.  Liberal logic on full display😅

How do you not get this, buddy?😂

[candide]

2 hours ago, newbee2022 said:

Thank you again to show us potus' Janus head.

Just one thing more.

You can buy a watch (wrist) with Trump's signature on it. They are going for around 700 Dollar.

Now the surprise.

When you got it home you'll realize a tiny bit of mistake. The (Chinese) company forgot the "T". Just a misprint.

Now it's only "RUMP". 

What do you think about it?🥰

I thought you were joking but it's actually true! 

 

https://nypost.com/2025/05/14/us-news/rhode-island-man-bummed-out-by-rump-typo-on-640-limited-edition-president-themed-watch-report/

[newbee2022]

26 minutes ago, candide said:

I thought you were joking but it's actually true! 

 

https://nypost.com/2025/05/14/us-news/rhode-island-man-bummed-out-by-rump-typo-on-640-limited-edition-president-themed-watch-report/

All I post is true 😁

[candide]

28 minutes ago, newbee2022 said:

All I post is true 😁

I forgot to upload the picture. It's nearly as distinguished as the golden sneakers. Only a MAGA would buy that crap for $640! 

 

https://nypost.com/2025/05/14/us-news/rhode-island-man-bummed-out-by-rump-typo-on-640-limited-edition-president-themed-watch-report/

[Eloquent pilgrim]

 

 

OCD

 

 

[save the frogs]

keep up the good work.

don't back down. 

 

[Lacessit]

2 hours ago, SunnyinBangrak said:

So the Thai 300% customs on importing US made cars is paid by who exactly? If your bluster is correct it's paid by America.  Liberal logic on full display😅

It's paid by the customer who buys it in Thailand. Although that really is doubling down on stupidity, when the Japanese make cars in Thailand for a much lower price and better quality.

 

Go back and read my post SLOWLY. Were you asleep in the English Comprehension classes?

[Lacessit]

9 minutes ago, save the frogs said:

keep up the good work.

don't back down. 

 

You don't think the 90 day pause on tariffs with China is backing down?

 

Pretty sure it wasn't the Chinese who blinked first.

[BLMFem]

32 minutes ago, candide said:

I forgot to upload the picture. It's nearly as distinguished as the golden sneakers. Only a MAGA would buy that crap for $640! 

 

https://nypost.com/2025/05/14/us-news/rhode-island-man-bummed-out-by-rump-typo-on-640-limited-edition-president-themed-watch-report/

That is honestly the ugliest time piece I have ever seen, and exactly what I expected.

[EVENKEEL]

4 hours ago, Lewie London said:

So I’m sittin’ on a red baht bus headin’ up toward Doi Suthep, tryin’ to enjoy me takeaway container of mango n' sticky rice in peace, when I hear this bloke across from me in a faded MAGA visor shoutin’ into his phone like he’s negotiatin’ a hostage release. “Trump always wins,” he’s sayin’ to his mate. “Biden’s soft, but Trump? Trump stood up to them there Chai-kneeeeez!”

 

Mate, stood up to the Chinese? The only thing he stood up for was a second scoop of ice cream while Beijing handed him his own arse on a silk plate. “He made them pay tariffs!” the bloke goes. Right. And I’m the governor of the Bank of England.

 

Let’s jog the memory, yeah? Trump swore up and down them tariffs were gonna make America rich again. Said there’d be so many billions comin’ in, they’d cancel income tax altogether. “No more tax on your overtime, no tax on your tips, no tax on your Social Security,” he said, like Santa on a ket bender. Billions and billions, he said. Rivers of Chinese yuan flowin’ straight into every American’s wallet. You lot were meant to be rubbin’ shoulders with the Rothschilds by now.

 

What actually happened? Farmers needed immediate bailouts. Prices gone up at Walmart. American companies are payin' the tariffs, not China. Trump taxed his own people, calls it victory, then needed to subsidise the damage with government cheese and bad vibes. That’s not a trade war win, that’s a circular firing squad with a campaign hat.

 

And now? What’s he doin’? Quietly droppin’ the tariff talk. Caved faster than a budget noodle stand in monsoon season. Suddenly there’s no more chinwag about scrappin’ income tax or livin’ off the fat of Chinese surrender money. Now it’s just, “Elect me and we’ll see what happens.” See what happens? I did that once with a dodgy massage and a seafood buffet. Never again.

 

Trump’s economic plan was basically a wish sandwich, two fat promises with nothin’ in the middle. And when it all flopped, he just moved the goalposts like he was playin’ quidditch on a golf course. One minute it’s tariffs make you rich, next minute it’s tariffs are punishment, now it’s “I’ll negotiate a better deal” like we all forgot the last one ended with soybeans and despair.

 

So I turns to the MAGA bloke, who’s now wipin’ Pad Thai sauce off his chest like it’s battle paint, and I says, “If Trump’s always winnin’, why do Americans look like they’re losin’ a game they didn’t even know they were playin’?” He blinked like someone just unplugged his VPN.

 

You wanna get rich off tariffs? Better off buyin’ scratch-offs with your rent money. At least the lottery doesn’t pretend it’s got a plan.

 

Trump’s “winning”? Mate, if this is winnin’, I’d hate to see what losin’ looks like.

 

And let’s not forget the other golden ticket, yeah? The big patriotic promise: tariffs will bring back American manufacturing. Rust Belt reborn, steel mills fired up, coal miners dancin’ in the streets with MAGA hard hats on. A whole nation of welders and factory lads punchin’ clocks and buildin’ dreams, right?

 

Except, where is it? I mean, seriously. Where’s this industrial renaissance? Last time I checked, the only thing made in America with any consistency was political grift and prescription opioids.

 

Trump said tariffs would force companies to move production back to the States. Turns out, companies just moved production somewhere else. Vietnam, Mexico, even back to China through backdoor routes. If Trump’s plan was to make America the middleman for its own supply chain, he bloody nailed it.

 

You can’t bring back manufacturing just by slappin’ fees on imports and shoutin’ about it from a gold toilet. You need infrastructure, education, workforce development, training, investment, raw materials, and long-term planning. But Trump’s idea of a ten-year plan is whatever fits on a rally hat.

 

And now he’s droppin’ the tariffs anyway. So no tax cuts, no trade war billions, no jobs revival. No nothin’. Just a buncha empty slogans echoing around an Ohio warehouse that’s now a pickleball court.

 

I turns back to MAGA man, who’s now scrollin’ Truth Social like he’s searchin’ for a purpose, and I says, “So how’s that whole Made in America thing workin’ out for ya?” He muttered somethin’ about ‘deep state sabotage’ and changed the subject to Hunter Biden’s laptop and Hillary's emails.

 

Mate, you were promised factories and fortunes. What you got was foam fingers, fake hats, and a tariff hangover with no paracetamol.

 

You want to bring back manufacturing? Try electin’ someone who knows what a supply chain is and doesn’t think ‘reshoring’ is somethin’ you do with golf clubs.

 

Because at this rate, the only thing America’s producing is conspiracy theories, reality stars, and broken promises, all proudly made in the USA. So there you have it, done and dusted, lads. 

Your problem is you are so poor you are forced to take baht buses. 555