Mrs. Smith is not feeling well, so her husband takes her to the hospital for

Some tests. After a week, the husband comes back and is met by the hospital's president.

"I'm terribly sorry to tell you this, Mr. Smith, but we made an awful mistake. The nurse who checked your wife in just checked her in as 'Mrs. Smith'. A day Earlier she checked another woman as 'Mrs. Smith'. Now we have two sets of results, but We don't know which one is your wife and which is another woman. "To make matters worse, one woman has Alzheimer's and the other AIDS..."

The husband begins to cry, "Oh my GOD! Alzheimer's, AIDS! AIDS, Alzheimer's! One of them is my wife, but I don't know which one- what do I do!?"

"Well, our distinguished committee of doctors met yesterday and we have the solution. Take your wife home and have her walk around the block. If she comes back, don't sleep with her!

And a variation of this:

A man goes to the hospital for some tests. When all the results are ready, the doctor tells him: I have some good news and some bad news for you. The bad news are that you have aids. The good ones are that you also have Alzheimers.

A man walks into the Drs office with a banana up his nose and a carrot in his ear. He says "Dr. I really haven't been feeling well lately." "Well I can seee your problem already- You just haven't been eating properly!"

Next man walks into a Drs office completely convered in saran wrap. Dr. says "I can clearly see your nuts."