To Be Or Not To Be

[francois]

To do is to be - Descartes

To be is to do - Voltaire

Do be do be do - Frank Sinatra

( Men's restroom, Greasewood Flats, Scottsdale, Arizona )

[Kathe2]

Dobedobedoooo.....thanks Francois,

now it's my turn.....

Son : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt ?

Father : No. Why do you ask that ?

Son : Well, where did you get THIS Mummy then ?

***********

[ThaiPauly]

Very Good,

try this, there was an Englishman a Scotsman and an irishman whose full time job was painting the forth road bridge, when they got to one end they would start at the other.

every day at 1pm they would stop and eat their packed lunch whilst sitting on the bridge. One particular day the englishman opened his sandwich box and just sat there looking at them. after a few moments he piped up"cheese and pickle AGAIN" I eat cheese and picle sandwiches EVERY day,I swear if I have to eat cheese and pickle sandwiches one more day I will throw myself off this bridge"

Once he has finished his tirade he starts to eat his lunch while the Scotsman opens his. "Corned Beef and Tomato AGAIN, every day I get Corned Beef and Tomato, I too will throw myself off this bridge if I get the same tomorrow" He then settles down to eat his loathed lunch. Then the irishman opens his,(Irish accent required) "Beejuzus, would you believe it- I've got egg and cress, I swear dat if I get egg and cress tomorrow I'll be joining you lads in da water so I will. "

The next day at 1pm the three of them stop to eat their luch at 1pm as they do every day. the Englishman opens his lunchbox and carefully unwraps his sandwiches from the tin foil "F####g Cheese and pickle, cheese and f####g pickle, thats it I've had ENOUGH", and with that he scibbles out a quick suicide note andthrows himself into the murky waters below. The Scotsman then carefully does the same, "Oh nuuuuuuw- its corned beef and tomato, I canna beleive it" and with that he too scribles a quick note, sticks it in his lunchbox next to his uneaten sandwich and also throws himself off the bridge, then the Irishman does the same thing, takes one look at his sandwiches and throws himself off.

A few weeks later an inquest was held into these men's deaths. After a verdict of suicide has been given, the three wives of the deceased gather in a corner, to discuss their feelings. The Englishman's wife sobs "If I had known that Billy felt that way about Cheese and pickle sandwiches I would have given him something different, but when he first got this job he said he loved them and never said another word about it since, if only I had seen that he needed variety' sob sob.

Then the Scotsman's wife said "Ah its aterrible thing right enough , Hamish never compalained once about his corned beef and tomato sandwiches in all the year's Ive been making them for him" sob, sob. The Englishman's wife handkercheif to her eyes then turned to the Irishman's wife who stood there looking silent and puzzled. "What about you Megan don't you feel you have let your husband down"

(sob, sob, cry cry) " Well its like dis you see, I caant really oonderstand it at all, because Paddy always made his OWN sandwiches so he did