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So Sad And Lonely

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John sounds like you have come into contact with the wrong group of people, do you have a NICE thai lady for company, if not please do yourself a favour and find one, i have and am very happy and contented, keep looking for good friends you will find them one day, keep smiling life is too short, all the best.

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Yes, that is me.

What the hell do you guys expect I just don't know.

I came to Thailand for a pleasant and peaceful retirement after 30 years of constant and stressful working.

It ain't happening.

Last month I went to England and Wales for a short visit, and met up with 3 old friends who all to a man put me up in their homes without question, it was if we had never been apart for the 10 years that was the case.

Sadly there are too many instances here of a flimsy friendship that amounts to nothing more than a pile of sh1t.

There are fortunately people here who can see over the horizon and you know who you are.

I don't wish any of you bad but please avoid me at all costs.

Well in the land of the blind the one eyed man is king, so you should be royalty here. I don't have the faintest idea what the horizon bit is all about but it gets my vote for post of the month anyway. Would a long weekend in Pattaya enliven your spirits, or a vipassana retreat perhaps?

There are two sides to every story/post. John is lonely because he lets himself down all the time. If he`s sad, the that is the consequnce of his actions.

The only reason I am posting is I may be one of the people he may be referring to in his OP.

None of the friends he has/had in CR have commented on this topic. That speaks volumes. The only people who have commented are people who don`t know him, with a few exceptions.

Felling sorry for himself. All self inflicted.

His great friends in England only had to put up with him for 3 days. It would only have been a matter of time!!!!!

I didn`t want to post on this topic but after re-reading the OP and seeing the "you know who you are" part I felt I had to post.

C35B.

Still in darkest Indonesia?

Yes mate, but I make it home to Thailand for R&R every 6 weeks or so.

After reading some of the posts here I do agree that self-pity and sadness are self inflicted... however if we conciously try to change our internal locus of control into a positive one, we become a person who owns their life and accepts responsibility for the consequences of all choices and actions.

If our locus of control is externally focussed, we tend to blame others, complain a lot, and make excuses.

We all do it... slip into negativity from time to time... the trick is to train our minds to recognise the symptoms and realign our thinking accordingly.

I have a "flimsy friendship" with John, and hope he reads the positive messages here and makes an attempt to change his outlook.

Taoism: shit happens

Buddhism: if shit happens, it isn't really shit

Islam: if shit happens, it is the will of Allah

Catholicism: if shit happens, you deserve it

Judaism: why does this shit always happen to us?

Atheism: I don't believe this shit

I've traveled all over Thailand. Try moving to Isaan where it's easier to make life-long friends. I came here with one friend, and now I have more good friends than time to give to all of them. My home is Grand Central Station with Thai friends dropping by for visits, conversation, going out for a beer (they often treat me), a day trip to a larger town for cinema or shopping. Isaan doesn't have much in the way of natural tourist attractions and the people make up for it by concentrating on forging solid, life-long relationships--even with foreigners if they're open to it.

  • 2 weeks later...

I've traveled all over Thailand. Try moving to Isaan where it's easier to make life-long friends. I came here with one friend, and now I have more good friends than time to give to all of them. My home is Grand Central Station with Thai friends dropping by for visits, conversation, going out for a beer (they often treat me), a day trip to a larger town for cinema or shopping. Isaan doesn't have much in the way of natural tourist attractions and the people make up for it by concentrating on forging solid, life-long relationships--even with foreigners if they're open to it.

Nice observation FH, one of our closest family friends and her husband are native Issaners relocated to CR about 10 years ago. She's a mayor and her husband's a lawyer, both kids currently at uni in Bangkok. Gives the lie to the stereotypes we hear about Issan. Unfortunately many of the posters here never get the opportunity to get past the stereotypes, they seem to prefer to remain in their self-imposed enclaves, even after 10 or more years in some cases.

But I do think OP makes an interesting point about flimsy relationships between retired farangs. Interestingly he was praised in 2007 for contributing one of the best posts at that time, I hope his star rises again.

There's only one person in the world who can make you happy or unhappy.

You see that person in the mirror every day.

There's only one person in the world who can make you happy or unhappy.

You see that person in the mirror every day.

VERY TRUE Gary.

Good comment.

  • Author

I am not a sad old lonely sod, and my OP was not a self pitying rant at all.

I was just extremely disappointed at something that had just transpired. The only way to get it off my chest was to post here, and I must say how much I appreciate the many thoughtful and caring replies you all have offered.

I have had the great pleasure of meeting Jaidee and what he says goes a long way, and I take it to heart very much.

I am most fortunate in having a wonderful wife, who I worship and still love deeply after 30 years together.

I also have a son living the dream in Canada, who has given me a grandson I am yet to meet.

I will PM you Paul, thanks for the invite.

  • Author
His great friends in England only had to put up with him for 3 days. It would only have been a matter of time!!!!!

Wow, you really know how to sink to the depths.

These friends I have known for 15 years or more , before I left for Thailand, are not just friends but family as well.

You have just slurred my friends in a way that is unforgivable Mr c35b.

His great friends in England only had to put up with him for 3 days. It would only have been a matter of time!!!!!

Wow, you really know how to sink to the depths.

These friends I have known for 15 years or more , before I left for Thailand, are not just friends but family as well.

You have just slurred my friends in a way that is unforgivable Mr c35b.

Can u please tell me what I said to slur your friends. Re-read again and take in what is written.

The comment was about you letting people down John.As is clear for all to read and understand. So do not try to turn it around. Do not let you new found dislike for me cloud you vision John.

Mr C35B.

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