Ten Things You Will Never Hear In Thailand.........

[Heimdallr]

Perhaps Thais have realized how overrated reading really is (that is, without analysis and some real thought put into it), compared to other brain-stimulating activities, such as gaming.

[smokie36]

Nevertheless SC this poster has definitely seen a Thai girl reading a book. I'm quite sure of that!

[canuckamuck]

Thai immigration.

....no need to travel out of the country to renew your visas...we will do them here in Bangkok...and save you money.

After coming to Thailand for 15 years I STILL have no idea why this country wants to send it's tourists to neighbouring countries to spend their money there instead of here. I DO understand why they want to know the whereabouts of the tourists and their travels, but why force them into another country when all they really want to know is where you are? A simple trip to immigration should give them all they need to know and it would keep the money incountry. Most people I talk to would rather pay Thailand immigration 500 to 1000 baht rather than spend 12 hours on bus and the cost of the trip to a neighbouring country. I can't think of ONE simple reason to send tourists with a valid visa away... unless of course it's to provide business for transportation companies.

Yes bloody ridiculous isnt it...apart from those quick day trips to the borders closest to Thailand....a fair percentage of us would spend at least one night possibly two or more overnighting outside of Thailand to renew/refresh our visas etc etc.

I wholeheartedly agree with you..you would think it could be done locally (within Thailands borders) even if they upped the fee to 500 1000baht it would not matter a dam_n too me. Brainless Immigration rule. I have asked the question many times at Immigration as to why they see it necessary to send people outside of Thailand to another country for visa renewal....99% of the heavily decorated immigration officers just shrug there shoulders and dont answer...the other 1% suddenly dont understand your question/enquiry.

Thailand is not the only country that has this requirement. The point is that if you are trying to live permanently in a country while on a tourist visa, then you have to leave in order to renew. If you had the proper visa this becomes a non-issue.

Gee I guess I will just stay home next time my 90 days are up because I have a one year non imm visa. Silly me, I have been traveling in and out every 3 months and it is so strange that they have only been giving me a stamp for 90 more days each time. Surely they meant to give me the full year that the visa says I am entitled too.

(sorry for the hijack folks, carry on)

[SabaiBKK]

I don't know what part of thailand you live in but Thais actually read quite a lot, bookshops are actually doing very good with Thai language books. so of course they may not read nietzche or kilkegaarde because its not in they scholar cursus at the contrary of european countries ( or truman Capote and John Fante for the american cursus) ... but they do have good authors like Piram Suda for instance who was nominated for the nobel prize of literature few years back...

Pile of rubbish all round, very very few Thais read extensively, I'd say less than 1% read by choice more than ten hours per year. Many farang don't read much either, especially in recent generations, but I don't know anyone back home who doesn't read at least a few books per year - that's real books, hundreds of pages of just words, not comic books or glossy magazines.

Over the years I've accumulated about half a shipping container's worth of books, and hope to one day open a second-hand book/coffeeshop. Most Thais when encountering my collection will ask something along the lines of "I can help you get rid of those", and I found out they mean sell them to the scrap recycler for pulping by the kg!

Regarding Pira, the Nobel Committee does not publicize the identities of any nominees for a period of fifty years after voting. There is no way to know who was nominated for a given Nobel Prize, and just because someone in a position of sufficient prestige in Thailand nominated him doesn't mean he's all that great.

OK for entertainment and learning about what the culture of Isaan used to be like, but not world-class from a literary POV.

I don't wish this to be deemed critical but in nearly eight years i don't remember ever seeing a thai read a book.

Just an observation so please don't bother to flame!

WOW! you have such low esteem for Thai people , that is scary! really!

as for the nobel prize nomination of Pira it was in 1990 for his novel moosoon country ... and I doubt it would be written on all his books and biographies if it was not true !

my wife reads tons of books ranging from history books to thrillers and they don't have images in it .... just go in the BTS and MRT and you will see legions of Thais and farangs reading books .... Hell just look at the magazines/ book shops in the BTS stations and they even have a top ten chart of their best selling titles ( even remember WEIWEI's Shangaï Baby being on top of the charts a few years ago )

welcome to the reality of Thailand.

[NewlyMintedThai]

Wow, I really feel sorry for all the owners of those book stores full of Thai language fiction and non-fiction -- you know, the ones that are in every provincial town and always seem full of customers. Since Thais never read, all those books must just be gathering dust. Sad.

[carmine]

I don't know what part of thailand you live in but Thais actually read quite a lot, bookshops are actually doing very good with Thai language books. so of course they may not read nietzche or kilkegaarde because its not in they scholar cursus at the contrary of european countries ( or truman Capote and John Fante for the american cursus) ... but they do have good authors like Piram Suda for instance who was nominated for the nobel prize of literature few years back...

Pile of rubbish all round, very very few Thais read extensively, I'd say less than 1% read by choice more than ten hours per year. Many farang don't read much either, especially in recent generations, but I don't know anyone back home who doesn't read at least a few books per year - that's real books, hundreds of pages of just words, not comic books or glossy magazines.

Over the years I've accumulated about half a shipping container's worth of books, and hope to one day open a second-hand book/coffeeshop. Most Thais when encountering my collection will ask something along the lines of "I can help you get rid of those", and I found out they mean sell them to the scrap recycler for pulping by the kg!

Regarding Pira, the Nobel Committee does not publicize the identities of any nominees for a period of fifty years after voting. There is no way to know who was nominated for a given Nobel Prize, and just because someone in a position of sufficient prestige in Thailand nominated him doesn't mean he's all that great.

OK for entertainment and learning about what the culture of Isaan used to be like, but not world-class from a literary POV.

I don't wish this to be deemed critical but in nearly eight years i don't remember ever seeing a thai read a book.

Just an observation so please don't bother to flame!

WOW! you have such low esteem for Thai people , that is scary! really!

as for the nobel prize nomination of Pira it was in 1990 for his novel moosoon country ... and I doubt it would be written on all his books and biographies if it was not true !

my wife reads tons of books ranging from history books to thrillers and they don't have images in it .... just go in the BTS and MRT and you will see legions of Thais and farangs reading books .... Hell just look at the magazines/ book shops in the BTS stations and they even have a top ten chart of their best selling titles ( even remember WEIWEI's Shangaï Baby being on top of the charts a few years ago )

welcome to the reality of Thailand.

Please grow up.

[SabaiBKK]

Please grow up.

oh yeah you really made a strong point with that stupid statement ... care to develop your thoughts?

[unanimosity]

That snake's harmless.

[carmine]

Please grow up.

oh yeah you really made a strong point with that stupid statement ... care to develop your thoughts?

Calm down dear and make yourself a cup of tea.

[StreetCowboy]

Please grow up.

oh yeah you really made a strong point with that stupid statement ... care to develop your thoughts?

Do you want me to hold your jacket?

I don't know about reading books, but if you chaps are facing up for a square go, I'm sure we could find a Thai to open a book on it.

SC

[carmine]

Please grow up.

oh yeah you really made a strong point with that stupid statement ... care to develop your thoughts?

Do you want me to hold your jacket?

I don't know about reading books, but if you chaps are facing up for a square go, I'm sure we could find a Thai to open a book on it.

SC

he's a very emotional guy isn't he.

[unanimosity]

Nevertheless SC this poster has definitely seen a Thai girl reading a book. I'm quite sure of that!

Are you sure it wasn't a mirror?

[smokie36]

Nevertheless SC this poster has definitely seen a Thai girl reading a book. I'm quite sure of that!

Are you sure it wasn't a mirror?

Ahh you know him then.

[SabaiBKK]

Please grow up.

oh yeah you really made a strong point with that stupid statement ... care to develop your thoughts?

Do you want me to hold your jacket?

I don't know about reading books, but if you chaps are facing up for a square go, I'm sure we could find a Thai to open a book on it.

SC

he's a very emotional guy isn't he.

not emmotional , just don't understand people who troll in threads writing just 3 words per post without contributing to the discution ... just asked him to develop his thoughts because i find it a little short .... but hey trolling is the only way to boost your post count to over 5000 ... imagine if he had to really take the time to think and write something consistent and of more than 4 words .... he would need to spend his days on TV .... ohh wait , its already the case

[smokie36]

not emmotional , just don't understand people who troll in threads writing just 3 words per post without contributing to the discution ... just asked him to develop his thoughts because i find it a little short .... but hey trolling is the only way to boost your post count to over 5000 ... imagine if he had to really take the time to think and write something consistent and of more than 4 words .... he would need to spend his days on TV .... ohh wait , its already the case

Tsk that's not very nice is it? I think we've bust a blood vessel or two here....someone call a doctor!

A Thai one who has read a few books preferably.

[carmine]

not emmotional , just don't understand people who troll in threads writing just 3 words per post without contributing to the discution ... just asked him to develop his thoughts because i find it a little short .... but hey trolling is the only way to boost your post count to over 5000 ... imagine if he had to really take the time to think and write something consistent and of more than 4 words .... he would need to spend his days on TV .... ohh wait , its already the case

Tsk that's not very nice is it? I think we've bust a blood vessel or two here....someone call a doctor!

A Thai one who has read a few books preferably.

Leave him smokie he's just a kid!!!

[unanimosity]

One thing i RARELY hear on this Forum is COMPLETE respect for the country of Thailand and our Majesty. I hope to hear more love and kindness from all visitors to the Kingdom of Thailand...

Perhaps, you need to turn the volume up.

[unanimosity]

Expat: My wife is just like all the rest.

[David48]

Thanks unanimosity for bring us back on course and you are rewared with #300

#301 Airport Immigration Official: ALL the booths are manned 24/7

#302 Airport Immigration Official: No waiting at Booth #4, 9, 10 and yes, 12 is awaiting you also. Please proceed and enjoy your stay in Thailand.

Edited March 18, 2012 by David48

[unanimosity]

303. Wife........If you can't buy property, we can just live in an apartment.

304. Wife........Since you can't buy property here, you could loan me the money to buy the property and appear on the title as the lender so if my family ever gets funny and the payments are not fulfilled on schedule you could foreclose and liquidate the property to recover your investment.

305. Merchant........No, that's okay, no extra charge for using a credit card.

306. Restaurant.......We have no idea where our fish comes from. We buy from Somchai. Maybe he gets it from the Klong with the oil slick on top

307. Driver........I was weaving in and out of traffic way over the speed limit while texting my GF and rear-ended the farang who was safely stopped ahead.

308. Caddy........That is a two-stroke penalty, the rules of golf do not allow a free drop ever, there is no such thing.

309. Tailor.......That color looks terrible on you.

310. Hotel......Since you aren't Thai and we are charging you extra, we'd love to upgrade you to a nicer room.

311. Dealer.......Sure you can make an offer on the Toyota, we love to wheel and deal.

312. Clerk......Which product do I recommend? Well the quality of this one is far better, look at the fabrication of the seams and the tensile strength is rated much higher than the other one so even though it is a few baht more, the superior quality makes it the best value.

Edited March 18, 2012 by unanimosity

[andrew55]

Another fun thread gone to the dogs with nasty personal comments. Ciao.

[khaowong1]

12) Ohhhh! you have small....!

As a friend once told me, he met a girl who wouldn't stop going on about how handsome he was. He convinced himself that she had a good point. Then she kept saying what a nice smile he had. Again, he couldn't believe what an honest and truthful girl she was. It wasn't until they got back to the bedroom and she pointed out what a large one he had that he realised she was a total bare faced liar.

Ha ha, good one, of course this never happened to me, I'm just saying. :-)

[unanimosity]

Another fun thread gone to the dogs with nasty personal comments. Ciao.

This one has been heard many times in Thailand, disqualified.

[andrew55]

Another fun thread gone to the dogs with nasty personal comments. Ciao.

This one has been heard many times in Thailand, disqualified.

You're correct. Fair disqualification.

In fairness some really amusing posts as well. I retract last post,

Which part of ciao didn't I understand?

Edited March 18, 2012 by andrew55

[beerchang]

Farang, "Wow, i've only been here 2 days and I can't believe how well these people drive!"

[andrew55]

Farang, "Wow, i've only been here 2 days and I can't believe how well these people drive!"

McLovin' it!

[loong]

Woman - "I only drink Fitne (don't know how to put oblique over the e) when I am constipated. Why would anybody think that a laxative will make you slimmer?"

[loong]

TV member - "I started a humerous thread on Thaivisa that started with some great one-liners and continued in the same vein with nobody nit-picking or trying to start an argument"

[daiwill60]

7-11, oh that ok mr Foreigner, I saw you had been standing there waiting for a till to come vacant before i got here , so why don't you go before me?

or 7-11 staff - Looking at you before someone else has pushed in , gesturing, yes sir can i help you, i think you 're next.

[lovelaos]

Thai to Farang : You're late!

Farang to Thai : You're early!