theajarn Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 Whatever you do, DON'T come back to Thailand for a few years. Don't bother trying this in a Thai court -- you WILL lose, unless you happen to be a hundred times richer than her and you can bribe your way through the Thai judicial system. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doodle Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 I suggest you lot give up on this one!. I agree with some of the previous posts, that this is just a wind-up. The OP is probably some bored member of one of the Pattaya forums having a laugh at your expense. I'd give up now, if I were you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ableguy Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 In thai culture when you have sexual relations with a women you are considered married. Thais are big in keeping face. If it has gotten around that you have slept with her and not making a legal marriage then it looks very bad for her family. must be a zillion married bar girls Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jacktrip Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 (edited) Are you kidding me. There is no satisfactory legal recourse should things escalate. The only solid protection you have is cutting all ties (this especially applies to 'friends' who are taking messages for you by the way) and not getting police or legal involved. Edited July 15, 2012 by jacktrip Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nattydread Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 but was she any good in the sack? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ripstanley Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 Very successful troll, kudos to the OP. Ok who's got the next troll? Make it a good one OK. Very true canuckamuck From post #69 to # 78 there are numerous posts about this thread bing a troll. I am amazed that it has now reach #95 with all the advice still being given. Maybe some posters do not read all postings. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
transam Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 Very successful troll, kudos to the OP. Ok who's got the next troll? Make it a good one OK. Very true canuckamuck From post #69 to # 78 there are numerous posts about this thread bing a troll. I am amazed that it has now reach #95 with all the advice still being given. Maybe some posters do not read all postings. Yep, must admit, l am one. OK, suspend me, l can take it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saroq Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 You quote that this lady is well to do and if this is true, than I doubt she is the type that would sleep around unless she believed or was lead to believe that she was in a strong or probable permanent relationship with a guy. So my questions to you are: Prior to bedding this woman, did you lead her on to believe that you and her were an item with intentions of a long term relationship or marriage? Were you totally honest with her as regards your situation and intentions during the periods of this friendship? What are your other commitment's outside Thailand? Do you have a girlfriend, wife or family abroad already? I doubt whether this lady would reacted so strongly for absolutely no reason, that just doesn’t make sense, so there must be a lot more to this than you are letting on? You obviously don't have much experience with Asian women and in particular those with Chinese backgrounds. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bendejo Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 If her family really is wealthy and connected maybe she did do some sort of denouncement of you being part of a drug gang to a relative who is in enforcement. Ridiculous sure, but if you return to the kingdom they may be waiting for you and find yourself in a gulity until proven innocent situation. In a country where the primary role of law enforcement is to collect money it's hard to say what the hoops will be exactly, but you can be sure it's going to cost you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
atyclb Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 (edited) Many times it's assumed if a man and women spend the night together (ie a trip together) that they had sex. Traditionally, men and women don't spend the night alone together unless they are married. I know this sounds old fashioned but that's the way it is. Thats not nearly 100 % true. There are lots of upscale women that date and sleep with the guy(s) they are dating, and also travel with them. I have first hand knowledge of this. IMO she has a loose screw and not sure if she copies Lakorn TV or it copies her. The drunkenness and her hostile response to you reminding her of it is consistent with, you guessed it "alcoholism" or alcohol problem. If you love her you could always tell her that in a sweet way but that the alcohol issue and others are not compatible with the relationship. Is it remotely possible that her "upscale affluent status" is staged as a way to find a walking ATM? Some affluent family members may still have financial problems or have been "cut off" by their family, and need a sponsor Edited July 15, 2012 by atyclb Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ripstanley Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 Very successful troll, kudos to the OP. Ok who's got the next troll? Make it a good one OK. Very true canuckamuck From post #69 to # 78 there are numerous posts about this thread bing a troll. I am amazed that it has now reach #95 with all the advice still being given. Maybe some posters do not read all postings. Yep, must admit, l am one. OK, suspend me, l can take it. I would not like to have you suspended. You give good contributions. I see we still have 3 additional posters with advice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phantomfiddler Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 (edited) Refuse all contact and move on. Obviously a nutter who thinks you can easily be intimidated. I,ve experienced similar literally hundreds of times, and the only way is to just get out the eraser ! Edited July 18, 2012 by metisdead : Bold font removed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayman Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 Many times it's assumed if a man and women spend the night together (ie a trip together) that they had sex. Traditionally, men and women don't spend the night alone together unless they are married. I know this sounds old fashioned but that's the way it is. Thats not nearly 100 % true. There are lots of upscale women that date and sleep with the guy(s) they are dating, and also travel with them. I have first hand knowledge of this. IMO she has a loose screw and not sure if she copies Lakorn TV or it copies her. It is true.. you're just confusing "upscale sluts" with "traditional thais". I am not saying that unmarried women don't sleep with men in Thailand. If you think I am even insinuating that you are dead wrong. I'm just telling you what is "assumed" by others when they see a man and women spend the night alone together. It is "assumed" by nearly everyone that they had sex(9/10 times they prob did right?). And in a traditional thai family it is frowned upon to have sex with someone you don't intend to marry. Not sure why this is getting so much resistance here. Of course Thailand has whores. Of course they are not considered "married" to all their customers. Of course they are not considered traditional thai girls either that are spoken about with high regard in the home village. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
atyclb Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 Many times it's assumed if a man and women spend the night together (ie a trip together) that they had sex. Traditionally, men and women don't spend the night alone together unless they are married. I know this sounds old fashioned but that's the way it is. Thats not nearly 100 % true. There are lots of upscale women that date and sleep with the guy(s) they are dating, and also travel with them. I have first hand knowledge of this. IMO she has a loose screw and not sure if she copies Lakorn TV or it copies her. It is true.. you're just confusing "upscale sluts" with "traditional thais". I am not saying that unmarried women don't sleep with men in Thailand. If you think I am even insinuating that you are dead wrong. I'm just telling you what is "assumed" by others when they see a man and women spend the night alone together. It is "assumed" by nearly everyone that they had sex(9/10 times they prob did right?). And in a traditional thai family it is frowned upon to have sex with someone you don't intend to marry. Not sure why this is getting so much resistance here. Of course Thailand has whores. Of course they are not considered "married" to all their customers. Of course they are not considered traditional thai girls either that are spoken about with high regard in the home village. FYI; while there is no doubt a % of stuck in tradition as you say, there are tons of professional gals, company office staff, uni grads, any profession/ degree you can think of, that have quite active sex lives. Lots of dating with sex among uni and high school students. What you call "upscale sluts" in my experience are educated gals typically living alone or with a roommate/friend in a bkk condo. Parents house(s), condo(s) typically have a few high end cars. I'm talking about women that take/invite the male friend on holiday. The gal that invites you to Spasso and wont let you pay for anything. The gal that makes all the freelancers at Spassos cringe. The type of gal that is very probably not on an online dating site, although not absolutely. The gal whose home village is somewhere on Soi Ekamai or Thonglor. Get the drift? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayman Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 (edited) Many times it's assumed if a man and women spend the night together (ie a trip together) that they had sex. Traditionally, men and women don't spend the night alone together unless they are married. I know this sounds old fashioned but that's the way it is. Thats not nearly 100 % true. There are lots of upscale women that date and sleep with the guy(s) they are dating, and also travel with them. I have first hand knowledge of this. IMO she has a loose screw and not sure if she copies Lakorn TV or it copies her. It is true.. you're just confusing "upscale sluts" with "traditional thais". I am not saying that unmarried women don't sleep with men in Thailand. If you think I am even insinuating that you are dead wrong. I'm just telling you what is "assumed" by others when they see a man and women spend the night alone together. It is "assumed" by nearly everyone that they had sex(9/10 times they prob did right?). And in a traditional thai family it is frowned upon to have sex with someone you don't intend to marry. Not sure why this is getting so much resistance here. Of course Thailand has whores. Of course they are not considered "married" to all their customers. Of course they are not considered traditional thai girls either that are spoken about with high regard in the home village. FYI; while there is no doubt a % of stuck in tradition as you say, there are tons of professional gals, company office staff, uni grads, any profession/ degree you can think of, that have quite active sex lives. Lots of dating with sex among uni and high school students. What you call "upscale sluts" in my experience are educated gals typically living alone or with a roommate/friend in a bkk condo. Parents house(s), condo(s) typically have a few high end cars. I'm talking about women that take/invite the male friend on holiday. The gal that invites you to Spasso and wont let you pay for anything. The gal that makes all the freelancers at Spassos cringe. The type of gal that is very probably not on an online dating site, although not absolutely. The gal whose home village is somewhere on Soi Ekamai or Thonglor. Get the drift? You are the one making this about income levels and class levels. I'm just talking about old school Thai tradition. Are you saying that since they come from money they are more traditional? or that traditions are changed with money? Again, I think you are confusing how folks act with what is traditional. One is contemporary and the other is traditional... get the drift? money gives thais status. A women with money will have more status than one without. A wealthy women that has a child out of wedlock will still be looked down on compared to a wealthy women that doesn't have a bastard child. In most countries this applies. Traditional Thailand does not condone having children outside a family unit. Albeit here in Thailand a family unit might consist of one husband/father and multiple wives. It is frowned upon to procreate outside the family unit. No matter how rich you are or who your parents are. In fact, I would think that the wealthy class would be more sensitive to this as having children out of wedlock would make them look more like commoners. and yes.. I've no doubt that many professional women are out there having sex out of wedlock but I would be surprised to hear that they went back to their wealthy parents and told them about it. Women of any class don't want to be seen taking home numerous "boy friends" to their parents. They will generally wait till they feel they are in a long term relationship that has legs to do that. In fact, this is true in many western countries as well. Edited July 15, 2012 by Jayman Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quadra Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 She is quite clearly a total nut job. I have lots of experience of dealing with women like this. Tell her that a gang of Filipino drug gangsters forced you to bed her in their efforts to gain access to her bank account. Tell her that in truth, you are actually in a very happy relationship with a garage mechanic called Rodney, and would she be so kind as to deal directly with the Filipinos if you could give them her telephone number... 55555 love it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thormaturge Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 aneliane is totally on the money here. I often liken Thailand to 1940's Britain. Decent people are overly concerned with their reputation and "what other people will think". Throw in standing up for the King at the cinema and suing for breach of promise and you have modern day Thailand in a nutshell. That said, the truly decent girls WON'T sleep with a man until they are married. It stikes me this one "strayed" and is just as angry with herself as with you; I have my doubts about her being a virgin when you met. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
atyclb Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 Reply to #106 "You are the one making this about income levels and class levels. I'm just talking about old school Thai tradition. Are you saying that since they come from money they are more traditional? or that traditions are changed with money? Again, I think you are confusing how folks act with what is traditional. One is contemporary and the other is traditional... get the drift? money gives thais status. A women with money will have more status than one without. A wealthy women that has a child out of wedlock will still be looked down on compared to a wealthy women that doesn't have a bastard child. In most countries this applies. Traditional Thailand does not condone having children outside a family unit. Albeit here in Thailand a family unit might consist of one husband/father and multiple wives. It is frowned upon to procreate outside the family unit. No matter how rich you are or who your parents are. In fact, I would think that the wealthy class would be more sensitive to this as having children out of wedlock would make them look more like commoners. and yes.. I've no doubt that many professional women are out there having sex out of wedlock but I would be surprised to hear that they went back to their wealthy parents and told them about it. Women of any class don't want to be seen taking home numerous "boy friends" to their parents. They will generally wait till they feel they are in a long term relationship that has legs to do that. In fact, this is true in many western countries as well." ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- We all know about the equation regarding money ~ status in Thailand. Have you ever pondered money providing freedom to do more things, access to better education, exposure to other cultures via travel, study, open mindedness etc etc. Thus money can affect tradition. Theres a % of females that are stuck in the "waiting for marriage" category, of which a fair % never get married and become old maids, or hook up with a tom. Why would anyone tell their parents they are sleeping with someone? Not common practice for adults. I doubt they'd tell their parents no matter who the guy is. Lets not forget that tradition here is rife with hypocrisy and contradiction. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocturn Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 The OP has not made a further comment since the inital posting. Do you not think this is a little strange. The OP has been asked questions but no responce. If I was the OP and this was a true incident I would have been making comments through the other 68 postings. Have a think. I think the OP is having a good laugh at this forum. Yep. Agreed. Appears to be a troll. Unfollowing thread. goodbye Joe! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayman Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 We all know about the equation regarding money ~ status in Thailand. Have you ever pondered money providing freedom to do more things, access to better education, exposure to other cultures via travel, study, open mindedness etc etc. Thus money can affect tradition. Theres a % of females that are stuck in the "waiting for marriage" category, of which a fair % never get married and become old maids, or hook up with a tom. Why would anyone tell their parents they are sleeping with someone? Not common practice for adults. I doubt they'd tell their parents no matter who the guy is. Lets not forget that tradition here is rife with hypocrisy and contradiction. well.. I guess the crazy b!tch in the story mr troll in the OP was telling told. Isn't that what this thread was about? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
canuckamuck Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 wuh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rotary Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 Change countries, I hear the Philippines is nice! Also commit "FaceBook Suicide". I did and many of my friends. All FB does is let you know when others are cheating on their spouse or going to the toilet. Just start going to another country for a few years then back to Thailand. When you come back change places you stay and places you go. That's all Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
atyclb Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 We all know about the equation regarding money ~ status in Thailand. Have you ever pondered money providing freedom to do more things, access to better education, exposure to other cultures via travel, study, open mindedness etc etc. Thus money can affect tradition. Theres a % of females that are stuck in the "waiting for marriage" category, of which a fair % never get married and become old maids, or hook up with a tom. Why would anyone tell their parents they are sleeping with someone? Not common practice for adults. I doubt they'd tell their parents no matter who the guy is. Lets not forget that tradition here is rife with hypocrisy and contradiction. well.. I guess the crazy b!tch in the story mr troll in the OP was telling told. Isn't that what this thread was about? Yes, thats what the OP said but our little interchange seemed to reflect/ ponder on society and not limited to the exact people involved in OP. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
talk2sam Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 I guess thai girls use same line....I once had an affair with a classmate of mine... she is of chinese descent...when i broke it off bcoz i couldn't stand her ego and lording...she sent all sort of threats to me and a close friend of mine....she said, she will send people to follow me around thailand and do me harm at her instruction...I keep all hr sms in my phone for reference.....pls just stay as far as you can from her.break all contacts, change your accomodation and places your hang out...afterawhile she will find another prey and move on.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thormaturge Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 ...and whats wrong with banana recipes? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Baerboxer Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 In thai culture when you have sexual relations with a women you are considered married. Thais are big in keeping face. If it has gotten around that you have slept with her and not making a legal marriage then it looks very bad for her family. This is generally only true if youre not Thai. IE: Thais do this all the time. In fact, it's actually difficult to find a Thai virgin over 18. Your white. You gonna pay one way or another. You need to go into deep hide whenever you're in Thailand. it's not hard at all to find thai virgins over 18. You must be looking in bars. How do you actually know this? Do you go around examining ladies virtue in some kind of weird 'Gladstonion" way? Or do you conduct street surveys and take their word for it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thormaturge Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 Baerboxer, my work brings me into contact with Thai office staff on a regular basis; especially government and school employees. It is not unusual to encounter entire offices full of middle-aged women whose idea of men seems is entirely derived from books, magazines and TV. It is bizarre and unnatural but they are so concerned about "what other people will think" that any contact with men has to be conducted covertly lest anyone "gets the wrong idea" and initial dates are conducted without holding hands, kissing or even seeming to be together at all. Weird it is, for sure. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NovaBlue05 Posted July 17, 2012 Share Posted July 17, 2012 Run Forrest....Run! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TommoPhysicist Posted July 17, 2012 Share Posted July 17, 2012 And in a traditional thai family it is frowned upon to have sex with someone you don't intend to marry. NO A traditional Thai lady, has sex with men she doesn't intend to marry, but doesn't let her family find out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GreenSnapper Posted July 17, 2012 Share Posted July 17, 2012 And in a traditional thai family it is frowned upon to have sex with someone you don't intend to marry. NO A traditional Thai lady, has sex with men she doesn't intend to marry, but doesn't let her family find out. Exactly. Just be discrete and you can shag them (mostly) all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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