Girls With Poor English

[payak]

there seems to be an overwhelming belief here that thai girls that speak English are BG or have had previous relationships.

If they have had previous relationships who cares, however it's not always the case, there are some very educated girls here and lets face it BG cannot at all speak good English.

my real question is how on earth can people form a relationship with someone who cannot speak English, and even further how do they hold it together, I would go insane,thats just me.

communication is everything in a real relationship, how do people sit there all day trying to make petty small talk about nonsense, just looking for something to say that they may understand, wouldnt it be easier to just find an English speaker

I have some Thai female friends that speak English better than Thai, as they were educated abroad. The 'overwhelming belief' you have must be talking about guys in Pattaya. OF COURSE there are MANY girls that speak English that aren't prostitutes - what an ignorant thing to assume.

To answer your real question my relationship with my wife has lasted 13 years - when we met, she couldn't speak English but I could speak reasonable Thai. She started going to English classes and I, of course, taught her. My Thai fluency increased dramatically too. It was fun, and there were situations when communication was a problem but I honestly think if we could communicate 100% in those early days, we wouldn't be together now. When our first kid came, my wife could speak reasonable English and I started only to speak English in the house, apart from a few important matters. Now, my wife is fluent in English. My Thai has suffered actually as I rarely speak in now - English at home and at work.

I know many relationships where the girl speaks little English and the guy speaks little Thai. Some of these have lasted many years - language of the heart.

Seems to me that anyone obsessing on whether the locals living in their own country, which said foreigner has chosen to live, can speak HIS language is a reflection of said foreigner's own ignorance. Why someone would marry a person from another culture, not learn their partners language, and expect their own language to be the mandatory communication method, is beyond me, and denotes a certain level of racism. Personally, I think those who marry Thais, but don't learn the language, are missing out on a greater understanding of the Thai way of thinking and view of life. Based on this and other postings, the OP continues to show his own insecurity and biased world view.

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at least my posts are not based on asumptions, i dont live in thailand.

hardly rascist when my children are half thai,

and I know more about thai history then most thai's, I have great respect for thailand, i love it.

was posting about people that cannot communicate, or did you fail to see that somehow, how do you know about my other posts when you failed to understand this one.

[payak]

_{starting a thread is hardly obssessing about something either.}

_{seems most expats on here are much the same as i see in thailand,}

_{drunks with issues, mostly anger issues, not all but most.}

_{its got me beat how this turns into an argument, and almost every poster to,}

_{grumpy old men, with no lives.}

[farangme]

_{starting a thread is hardly obssessing about something either.}

_{seems most expats on here are much the same as i see in thailand,}

_{drunks with issues, mostly anger issues, not all but most.}

_{its got me beat how this turns into an argument, and almost every poster to,}

_{grumpy old men, with no lives.}

Given your complete disdain for others here, why do you post on tv? Seems you're the one with no life. You embarrass yourself with every post. Keep up the nice work.

ps - post topic seems ironic given your own command of english appears wanting.

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[Mossfinn]

His command of English is enough to warrant 124 responses to date, can they be understood? Yes, are they agreeable, well that depends on your point of view.

[payak]

if people dont like it when i counter, dont attack.

this is what you guys do so expect it.

i wont leave because there are a few good men here, very few but there here.

[payak]

oh yes, if you find my spelling or grammer annoying, your wives must be doing your head in.

kind of proved my point, thankyou.

[onionluke]

oh yes, if you find my spelling or grammer annoying, your wives must be doing your head in.

kind of proved my point, thankyou.

Dinnae get upset , there's plnty more to compre .....

[Mossfinn]

if people dont like it when i counter, dont attack.

An eye for an eye, unfortunately everyone ends up blind.

Welcome to the General forum

[Wilda]

I met my Thai girlfriend while I was travelling in USA 3 years ago. I couldn't speak much English but google translate helped me a lot!

We wrote each other by Skype for over 3 months then my English started to be enough good for taking the next step: webcam! She always corrects my English and that has been helping me a lot!

so just let you know to the OP that the language is not a problem at all if both of them try hard!

[HardenedSoul]

Could it be that you have something to prove to the other wannabe-alpha males here?

So why did you admit in another thread that you haven't had a girlfriend for 5 years?

All that stuff, but no girlfriend ...... what's wrong with you then?

Bleating on about Alpha-males and you can't get a girlfriend in the girlfriend capitol of the world Bangkok!

PS

I never claimed alpha-male status, I'm a nerd with money.

What do you mean "why did I admit I havent had a girlfriend for 5 years"?

Put simply . . . because that's the truth

I don't have to move a bird into my place to have the fun I seek.

I'm not such a loser that I can't bear to be be alone and need to have someone - anyone - to make my existence worthwhile and, unlike you, it takes more than an a "suck-it-and-see" overnight interview arranged by a young woman's bargirl sibling to satisfy my criteria for a girlfriend/partner/wife.

If it was just a matter of moving in a beautiful girl and limiting our conversations to superficial nonsense conducted in pidgin English then, believe me, I could pick up the phone right now and have a gaggle of truly stunning suitors outside my door in two hours flat but, unlike you, I prefer not to lower the bar.

I guess that's what's "wrong" with me.

[cdnvic]

I never claimed alpha-male status, I'm a nerd with money.

No judgment on either side of the debate. I just loved that line is all.

[payak]

Could it be that you have something to prove to the other wannabe-alpha males here?

So why did you admit in another thread that you haven't had a girlfriend for 5 years?

All that stuff, but no girlfriend ...... what's wrong with you then?

Bleating on about Alpha-males and you can't get a girlfriend in the girlfriend capitol of the world Bangkok!

PS

I never claimed alpha-male status, I'm a nerd with money.

What do you mean "why did I admit I havent had a girlfriend for 5 years"?

Put simply . . . because that's the truth

I don't have to move a bird into my place to have the fun I seek.

I'm not such a loser that I can't bear to be be alone and need to have someone - anyone - to make my existence worthwhile and, unlike you, it takes more than an a "suck-it-and-see" overnight interview arranged by a young woman's bargirl sibling to satisfy my criteria for a girlfriend/partner/wife.

If it was just a matter of moving in a beautiful girl and limiting our conversations to superficial nonsense conducted in pidgin English then, believe me, I could pick up the phone right now and have a gaggle of truly stunning suitors outside my door in two hours flat but, unlike you, I prefer not to lower the bar.

I guess that's what's "wrong" with me.

love this

Edited December 4, 2012 by payak

[Johnniey]

there seems to be an overwhelming belief here that thai girls that speak English are BG or have had previous relationships.

If they have had previous relationships who cares, however it's not always the case, there are some very educated girls here and lets face it BG cannot at all speak good English.

my real question is how on earth can people form a relationship with someone who cannot speak English, and even further how do they hold it together, I would go insane,thats just me.

communication is everything in a real relationship, how do people sit there all day trying to make petty small talk about nonsense, just looking for something to say that they may understand, wouldnt it be easier to just find an English speaker

I have some Thai female friends that speak English better than Thai, as they were educated abroad. The 'overwhelming belief' you have must be talking about guys in Pattaya. OF COURSE there are MANY girls that speak English that aren't prostitutes - what an ignorant thing to assume.

To answer your real question my relationship with my wife has lasted 13 years - when we met, she couldn't speak English but I could speak reasonable Thai. She started going to English classes and I, of course, taught her. My Thai fluency increased dramatically too. It was fun, and there were situations when communication was a problem but I honestly think if we could communicate 100% in those early days, we wouldn't be together now. When our first kid came, my wife could speak reasonable English and I started only to speak English in the house, apart from a few important matters. Now, my wife is fluent in English. My Thai has suffered actually as I rarely speak in now - English at home and at work.

I know many relationships where the girl speaks little English and the guy speaks little Thai. Some of these have lasted many years - language of the heart.

Seems to me that anyone obsessing on whether the locals living in their own country, which said foreigner has chosen to live, can speak HIS language is a reflection of said foreigner's own ignorance. Why someone would marry a person from another culture, not learn their partners language, and expect their own language to be the mandatory communication method, is beyond me, and denotes a certain level of racism. Personally, I think those who marry Thais, but don't learn the language, are missing out on a greater understanding of the Thai way of thinking and view of life. Based on this and other postings, the OP continues to show his own insecurity and biased world view.

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at least my posts are not based on asumptions, i dont live in thailand.

hardly rascist when my children are half thai,

and I know more about thai history then most thai's, I have great respect for thailand, i love it.

was posting about people that cannot communicate, or did you fail to see that somehow, how do you know about my other posts when you failed to understand this one.

Your real reasons for this thread are becoming apparent.

You're attacking others because of your own inferiority complex.

Perhaps you are having relationship problems yourself. Maybe your wife's previous ones do bother you.

Normal happy people don't care about things that are not their business. They don't have the need to attack others to make themselves feel better. They live and let live.

You talk about "here" in your posts, suggesting you live in Thailand.

I suggest you start looking within.

[chiangmaikelly]

Could it be that you have something to prove to the other wannabe-alpha males here?

So why did you admit in another thread that you haven't had a girlfriend for 5 years?

All that stuff, but no girlfriend ...... what's wrong with you then?

Bleating on about Alpha-males and you can't get a girlfriend in the girlfriend capitol of the world Bangkok!

PS

I never claimed alpha-male status, I'm a nerd with money.

What do you mean "why did I admit I havent had a girlfriend for 5 years"?

Put simply . . . because that's the truth

I don't have to move a bird into my place to have the fun I seek.

I'm not such a loser that I can't bear to be be alone and need to have someone - anyone - to make my existence worthwhile and, unlike you, it takes more than an a "suck-it-and-see" overnight interview arranged by a young woman's bargirl sibling to satisfy my criteria for a girlfriend/partner/wife.

If it was just a matter of moving in a beautiful girl and limiting our conversations to superficial nonsense conducted in pidgin English then, believe me, I could pick up the phone right now and have a gaggle of truly stunning suitors outside my door in two hours flat but, unlike you, I prefer not to lower the bar.

I guess that's what's "wrong" with me.

It's not only English. In my case, and I'm really hi so with a high bar to go with it, a woman must be a classically trained Russian ballet dancer or the first violin in a major symphony orchestra. I have tried cellists and ballets from the former Soviet republics and it's not the same. There is nothing like the finger movements of a first violin player and the calf muscles of a Russian ballet dancer.

I could pick up the phone right now and fill my home with lesser dancers or musicians who spoke 26 languages but no. Not for me. I won't lower my bar. I haven't had a girlfriend in 27 and a half years but I won't lower my standards.

[robblok]

I used to be one of those guys with a wife who did not speak much english. I was younger and stupid back then. Learned the hard way communication is important.

But girls with good english who are not bar girls and have a future or good income are out of reach of many guys who are simply not attractive. Be it age manners body shape or income. Many are just not desireable by those girls so they hunt for girls who have no income or future and often no english skills.

You cant have it all most of us cant. But i bet most of us wish they could communicate good with their partner if they could choose. But often they cant choose.

Actually I wish my wife couldn't speak any English at all. My Thai would be a lot better.

But let's face it, this whole thread is a thinly disguised, old guy bashing thread.

I have money and education but I'm old, that doesn't mean I want an old woman, I can afford better.

Why would any Thai woman want a foreign guy that has nothing?

Let alone the wealthy and educated Thai ladies.

@the youngsters Payak, HS and Rob

Tell us again what you have to offer a Thai woman ...... good looks ...... your kiddin' yourselves.

I don't see any of you participating in the Thai language section of TV.

No old guy bashing here its about communication. What i can offer girls is also not under discussion. I never said i dont have money (just dont flaunt with it or use it for bait) or cant speak Thai.

I cant read it and wish i had the time and that there was a school close by. My businesses is running too good i work too much combined with working out a lot it does not leave me with much time. I speak more then enough in most situations. I live in an area without other foreigners. That helps a lot. Your point about wishing that your wife would is right and wrong.

I 100% agree that you learn Thai much faster if your wife does not speak English with you. Our conversations are more and more in Thai because i like improving on it. She hates it as her English gets less that way. So from that point you are right.

The part where you are wrong is that this means a whole long period in a relationship where there is no good communication. That is bad IMHO certainly early on in a relationship where you need to learn about her.

But from your posts i get the feeling sex and looks are all you need. So not a problem for you.

Your a syrange guy in some post you say your wealthy in others you show and say your poor.

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[farangme]

Could it be that you have something to prove to the other wannabe-alpha males here?

So why did you admit in another thread that you haven't had a girlfriend for 5 years?

All that stuff, but no girlfriend ...... what's wrong with you then?

Bleating on about Alpha-males and you can't get a girlfriend in the girlfriend capitol of the world Bangkok!

PS

I never claimed alpha-male status, I'm a nerd with money.

What do you mean "why did I admit I havent had a girlfriend for 5 years"?

Put simply . . . because that's the truth

I don't have to move a bird into my place to have the fun I seek.

I'm not such a loser that I can't bear to be be alone and need to have someone - anyone - to make my existence worthwhile and, unlike you, it takes more than an a "suck-it-and-see" overnight interview arranged by a young woman's bargirl sibling to satisfy my criteria for a girlfriend/partner/wife.

If it was just a matter of moving in a beautiful girl and limiting our conversations to superficial nonsense conducted in pidgin English then, believe me, I could pick up the phone right now and have a gaggle of truly stunning suitors outside my door in two hours flat but, unlike you, I prefer not to lower the bar.

I guess that's what's "wrong" with me.

So it would appear you are well acquainted with a gaggle of stunning suitors who only speak pidgin English. They also satisfy the fun you seek. Funny how you are well connected with these low bar suitors, yet they're not worthy of serious involvement. Can only imagine where you met them. Can we say hypocrite? Guess others should do as you say, not as you do.

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[VillageIdiot]

Learn to speak Thai.

Then all your communication problems with the natives will be over.

[robblok]

I used to be one of those guys with a wife who did not speak much english. I was younger and stupid back then. Learned the hard way communication is important.

But girls with good english who are not bar girls and have a future or good income are out of reach of many guys who are simply not attractive. Be it age manners body shape or income. Many are just not desireable by those girls so they hunt for girls who have no income or future and often no english skills.

You cant have it all most of us cant. But i bet most of us wish they could communicate good with their partner if they could choose. But often they cant choose.

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Why cant they choose?

If they did get to a time where they wish they could communicate, then why not they learn Thai?

It is not impossible to learn good enough Thai to talk about trust,commitment and honesty. I been with girls who have no English and you must have to learn Thai, if you want to go on with them anyways.

Sometimes actually i find when speaking Thai it is easier to bring up many topics than in speaking English. If i had to say some of those things to them in English rather than thai i would for sure probably get a smack in the head!

I would say speaking Thai in Thailand is normal. Just see many expats in tourist area's with little or no Thai skills. If you live among Thais it probably is easier to learn.

My thai skills are not great but sufficient and improving. A few days ago I was fishing with my dad and a Thai guide (for dad), i have known the guide for years and his english is good but we spoke Thai the whole day at my request, just because i like too and it helps me improve.

So yes it would be logical but many don't. My thai would be better if i visited a school but I need ro travel over an hour single distance. Combine that with a good running business that demands time does not work. So i mostly study from books and listen Thai radio and talk with Thais. I tried reading for a while but could not put in consistent hours, i might try again.

But many guys just don't even try plus i think you need good skills to have good conversations. Not just standard sentences and replies. Languages have many nuances. I speak more different languages then most here i guess. So i know what im talking about, there is a difference between knowing a few words and having a dictionary ready or really knowing the language. This for instance is not my mother tongue but i speak and write it well enough.

[TommoPhysicist]

You know your Thai is getting better when you can ask the m/c shop to put new bearings in your back wheel.

And he understands you.

[pattayadingo]

There are such things a dictionaries. Then comes patience.

Two Thai friends both spoke some English and learned more from me throughout the friendship. These friendships survived even with little English in the first place. All it took was time, patience and a dictionary.

To me the same applies with a Thai relationship. You both take time to learn. Understanding someone does not come from language alone.

When I was out in the boonies I got by very well with my ability to speak very little Thai and with people who spoke little or no English.

As said earlier by another poster, if I want to speak English and to have in depth conversations I go and see my English speaking friends or use the phone to talk to them.

[Huayrat]

How can a Thai girl who has a boyfriend who cant speak thai and lives in her country be happy with that???

[Desi Babe]

1. As for dump people, they still have love

2. yes Thai girls hardly can speak good English and its hard to communicate too if there is body langage

[NanLaew]

Could it be that you have something to prove to the other wannabe-alpha males here?

So why did you admit in another thread that you haven't had a girlfriend for 5 years?

All that stuff, but no girlfriend ...... what's wrong with you then?

Bleating on about Alpha-males and you can't get a girlfriend in the girlfriend capitol of the world Bangkok!

PS

I never claimed alpha-male status, I'm a nerd with money.

What do you mean "why did I admit I havent had a girlfriend for 5 years"?

Put simply . . . because that's the truth

I don't have to move a bird into my place to have the fun I seek.

I'm not such a loser that I can't bear to be be alone and need to have someone - anyone - to make my existence worthwhile and, unlike you, it takes more than an a "suck-it-and-see" overnight interview arranged by a young woman's bargirl sibling to satisfy my criteria for a girlfriend/partner/wife.

If it was just a matter of moving in a beautiful girl and limiting our conversations to superficial nonsense conducted in pidgin English then, believe me, I could pick up the phone right now and have a gaggle of truly stunning suitors outside my door in two hours flat but, unlike you, I prefer not to lower the bar.

I guess that's what's "wrong" with me.

Hey! I just found a picture of your old girlfriend in a thong.

[tingtongtourist]

Actually many girls, and them you should avoid, are very happy if the farang doesnt know any Thai.

First because he does have to rely on her help for many things, so she have the control.

2nd. Many of these girls believe they can not so easily BS a farang who speaks Thai.she never will know just how much he can understand so she have to be careful all the time around friends and also what her friend will say if they meet you and dony know.

Ive heard it more than once that this type prefer a farang who speak no thai..in thai of course

Some do even believe is perfectly Ok to lie in English but cannot lie in Thai

[kblaze]

Communication only needs to be at a level wherein both partners are satisfied. Anything less and there will troubles.

[arthurwait]

1. As for dump people, they still have love

2. yes Thai girls hardly can speak good English and its hard to communicate too if there is body langage

He's all yours.

[Johnniey]

How can a Thai girl who has a boyfriend who cant speak thai and lives in her country be happy with that???

They realise that many farang are handicapped in this area and accept it.

Can you imagine a girl in your country dating or marrying a man with a similar outlook. If she didn't teach him ENGLISH or he reused to learn, they'd be laughed at.

Here other Thais realise that many farang are too stupid or arrogant to learn a language.

[Zooheekock]

How can a Thai girl who has a boyfriend who cant speak thai and lives in her country be happy with that???

Given the type of guy most of these women - I'm more interested in women than in girls - end up with, I suspect that's actually a positive; God forbid that they would have to share a house with, have sex with, and talk to these people.

[marstons]

Money over comes all barriers for the ladies and a lady half your age and weight breaks down barriers for the guys. 2 TVs one for farang one for the thai lady what more do you need. Personally no degree and exellent English no way. Degree bit not only means usually good english but a life outside the village for a few years in BKK

[farangme]

Let's try thus: suppose you take a trip to France and speak little French. You meet a French lady who speaks little English. You are attracted to one another. Should one not try to further communication? Should one assume the woman is an uneducated, hooker from the farm? Seriously....So what's the difference here. Everyones got there own story. My wife has a uni degree, but doesn't speak fluent English, but its better than my Thai, and I certainly can't read/write it. We've never been at a loss of things to talk about and all of our couples friends are of similar circumstance. I'd pose that far more Thais are proficient and/or capable with English than foreigners are with Thai. A more appropriate thread would be 'Farang with poor Thai.'

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