Popular Post yourauntbob Posted April 5, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted April 5, 2013 So the missus when out shopping with her cousin and a couple friends last night and didnt return home until late (about 11pm). After she got settled in she told me her cousin was impressed that when they go out, I never call. Apparently all the other b/f, husbands, or lovers will call their significant other several times and some even make them take picture with the group to verify they are not out with other men. One asks to talk with my g/f to verify as well. So to my question: Is it just me or western culture of giving space to your significant other. Do you check up on the missus when she is out with friends? p.s. Miss auntbob does not contact me when i am out with the guys, she gives me my space as well 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post robblok Posted April 5, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted April 5, 2013 I give her all the space she wants and vice versa, if someone wants to cheat they will find a way anyway. Plus I don't want to live in fear of neither do I want to be checked all the time. Most guys seem to want freedom but on the other hand lock their wife up, i just feel that is totally unfair. Besides I don't worry one bit about her cheating as i am confident about myself. 21 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocN Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 You only give her "all the freedom", until you have been burned ones...or twice... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robblok Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 You only give her "all the freedom", until you have been burned ones...or twice... Sure better lock someone up before they commit a crime.. makes sense does it not. Anyway if i get burned it might be over or not depending but until that time all the freedom they want. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post USNret Posted April 5, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted April 5, 2013 I'm not gonna spend my time with someone I don't trust & who doesn't trust me. Been there, done that, and got out of that bad relationship (much too late). BTW, that was not a Thai lady. My wife & I trust each other completely, there is no notion of checking up. If I find one day I made a big mistake, so be it. But it's better than living a bitter life of constant accusations & mistrust. 20 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post uptheos Posted April 5, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted April 5, 2013 "Apparently all the other b/f, husbands, or lovers will call their significant other several times and some even make them take picture with the group to verify they are not out with other men". Anyone doing this, obviously knows the type of wife/gf he has and is probably a very unhappy person. 13 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeavyDrinker Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 You reap what you sow. My missus can go out when she likes which means I am free to go on a toot this aftie down Nana.... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post cycloneJ Posted April 5, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted April 5, 2013 never but simple politeness I'll ring or text if eg I'm going to be home an hour late, same as wife will if late from the office. Not checking up. No harm in that 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post thenervoussurgeon Posted April 5, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted April 5, 2013 Why would you marry someone you do not trust? i trust my wife completely,she has my bank details ,everything ,she goes away on buisness a few times a year ,i go to the bar with friends ,we do not check up on each other all the time , she is 23 years younger than me and we have a teenage son , we just love and trust each other, but then i did not meet her in a bar and marry her a couple of months later. buyer beware!! 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pattayadingo Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 If I am out she will phone at the same time every night - as Thai tv finishes - to say goodnight. No grilling, no questions as to what I am doing. I roll home and she is asleep. Next morning no questions either. As long as I come home to sleep she is happy. If she is out without me, a very rare thing, I do not phone her at all nor do I ask who, why, what, when and where. If she is going to get up to something, she will do it and lie about it anyway, don't they all? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JLCrab Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 Why would you marry someone you do not trust? i trust my wife completely,she has my bank details ,everything ,she goes away on buisness a few times a year ,i go to the bar with friends ,we do not check up on each other all the time , she is 23 years younger than me and we have a teenage son , we just love and trust each other, but then i did not meet her in a bar and marry her a couple of months later. buyer beware!! Sounds like Ward & June Cleaver on 'Leave it to Beaver' 1950-60's American TV sitcom Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post HeavyDrinker Posted April 5, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted April 5, 2013 Actually, scrub my above post. I apparently am NOT free to go on a toot this aftie down Nana.... 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
weegee Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 I'm not gonna spend my time with someone I don't trust & who doesn't trust me. Been there, done that, and got out of that bad relationship (much too late). BTW, that was not a Thai lady. My wife & I trust each other completely, there is no notion of checking up. If I find one day I made a big mistake, so be it. But it's better than living a bitter life of constant accusations & mistrust. Was that a Singapore girl by any chance???? sounds horrible familiar to me...Yep... much too late. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
transam Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 I never phone. But saying that, l trust no one on this planet. My ''loving'' UK ex after 25 years taught me that, as well as other stuff. Sad I know but I ''was'' a very trusting bloke. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JUDAS Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 (edited) The OP's wife should let her friends know that they are actually not in a normal relationship at all. The behavior mentioned sounds as if the guys have some serious issues. Edited April 5, 2013 by JUDAS Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocN Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 You only give her "all the freedom", until you have been burned ones...or twice... Sure better lock someone up before they commit a crime.. makes sense does it not. Anyway if i get burned it might be over or not depending but until that time all the freedom they want. Not lock up...but be a little more...attentive! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
harryfrompattaya Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 Why would you marry someone you do not trust? i trust my wife completely,she has my bank details ,everything ,she goes away on buisness a few times a year ,i go to the bar with friends ,we do not check up on each other all the time , she is 23 years younger than me and we have a teenage son , we just love and trust each other, but then i did not meet her in a bar and marry her a couple of months later. buyer beware!!Sounds like Ward & June Cleaver on 'Leave it to Beaver' 1950-60's American TV sitcomTo me it sounds worst and it just a cover up Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berkshire Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 Is anyone actually going to admit that they are the insanely jealous type? Only if they enjoy being unmercifully shredded for being in an untrusting/unloving relationship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maxme Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 Is anyone actually going to admit that they are the insanely jealous type? Only if they enjoy being unmercifully shredded for being in an untrusting/unloving relationship. Jelousy comes with the territory but in the end it all comes down to trust. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NanLaew Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 A buddy of mine had a local wife who, when they lived together in Thailand, would seldom allow him out with the lads but when she did, would insist on checking his underwear when he got home for 'evidence' of cheating. Meanwhile, her cheating with her 'brother-in-law' motorcycle taxi guy while my buddy was away working was a popular topic as well. Anyway, they moved back to his homeland and made a go of it there and would come back to Thailand every 2 or 3 years to visit. She was still as controlling and one time when us lads were coming back from some 'afternoon delights', she calls him on his mobile. He is in the back seat and says, 'yes, I am with the lads and on our way back now' and that's that. I am driving and about a minute later, my phone rings and it's her calling me to check if her hubby is with us. I said as much and added again that we were on our way back. Then she asks me to pass MY phone to her hubby so she can talk with him. I guess she was so suspicious, she was closing out the possibility that we were both lying on some convoluted cheating scenario that he may have set up. I was about to hand the phone over to my mate when I thought bugger this two-faced cow and told her that he couldn't speak right now as he was busy with the girls in the back seat. I haven't seen either of them back in Thailand in ages. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Indrid Cold Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 I dont care what the gf for the time being does when i dont see her, the relation will not last long anyway. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post BookMan Posted April 5, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted April 5, 2013 I rarely check up on my GF when she is out. It is a basic insecurity thing to be calling to check up on her. She went on holiday for 2 nights with a group of friends to Hua Hin. Her friends BFs/Husbands were calling and texting her friends three, four, five times in the day. The friends thought it was strange that I didn't call her and asked why I did not call. I would think the last thing she would want to do is have me calling her all day when she is with her group of friends, catching up with gossip, shopping, eating. If she wants to speak to me or if there is a problem she'll call me. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
asiasurfer Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 I don't mind if my wife had something with another guy as long as she comes back to me and doesn't get sick or pregnant. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
petermik Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 If my GF can find a better guy than me then good luck-and goodbye-to her 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
weegee Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 I never phone. But saying that, l trust no one on this planet. My ''loving'' UK ex after 25 years taught me that, as well as other stuff. Sad I know but I ''was'' a very trusting bloke. Ditto!!!! Some are a hell of a lesson hey? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maxme Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 Actually, scrub my above post. I apparently am NOT free to go on a toot this aftie down Nana.... She read your post, didn't she? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
weegee Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 Actually, scrub my above post. I apparently am NOT free to go on a toot this aftie down Nana.... Now that was funny..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post bonobo Posted April 5, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted April 5, 2013 Jealousy is an anathema to a loving relationship, in my opinion. I have seem more marriages fail because of it than I can count. Just yesterday, I found out that a couple I know is probably getting divorced. The husband's irrational jealousy forced his wife to drop out of school, then quit her job at the hospital. Two days ago, he walked over and punched out an old family friend because he thought he was having an affair with his wife. This is in a small village where everyone knows everyone else, and having an affair in the village would be extremely difficult from a logistical standpoint. The husband is a very good-looking guy who owns a truck, and I am sure he could cheat if he so desired. The wife is a rather overweight, dark-skinned unattractive mother of two who cannot drive. I am not dumping on her looks here, but just to point out that she is not the epitome of what most Thai guys seek for a gik or whatever, and without a car, she is pretty much stuck in the village 24-7. My personal gut feeling is that she is not having an affair, especially with an old family friend. Jealousy, however, rarely takes logic into account. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yourauntbob Posted April 5, 2013 Author Share Posted April 5, 2013 The OP's wife should let her friends know that they are actually not in a normal relationship at all. The behavior mentioned sounds as if the guys have some serious issues. I have told her that, but no one listens to the crazy farang.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
talk2sam Posted April 5, 2013 Share Posted April 5, 2013 Jealousy is a favorite pastime of woman in thailand... Common everywhere but never seen it like it is here. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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