bubblegum Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 So what to do ? Mind my own business or do something for the sake of a 2 year old ? I know of this Thai / Western couple who have a 2 year old boy. The boy is not the brightest I've ever seen and still does not talk much. Now the man works on and off, 1 month home, 1 month off kind of work and when he's at home all seems nice and good. But everytime he's off to work the place turn into an illigal casino. At any time between 2 p.m. and 2 a.. there will be about 20 Thai "ladies" playing cards and the kid does not get out at all. At times he is even locked into the bathroom !! As not to disurb the players. This is what I think at times like that : " Stay out of it ! It's not your family, you are not a snich ! Nobody will appreciate you if you tell " and so on an on. Then the other side of my brain kickes in and starts talking " Look at the poor boy he hasn't got a life !! " It's driving me bonkers So what would you do ? Nothing Tell the dad Tell the police Tell his countries embassy ?????????????? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post David48 Posted May 9, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted May 9, 2013 In your own words ... "Mind my own business" It's nice that you care ... ... but how another couple raise their child is not your business. If you have a Thai partner ... what does he/she say? . 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LivinginKata Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 This would be better placed in the 'Family & Children' Forum ---> moving Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
transam Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 This is NOT farangland and the sooner folk who come here realize that the better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phronesis Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 A home casino, or BON as it is called in Thai is illegal. Take some photos and have some one pen a description in Thai and then drop an envelope containing these details into the provincial police station. A raid on the Bon should ensue, thereby releasing the mother from her gambling commitments to focus more satisfactorily on parenting. Or she will go to the monkey house and the father will have to arrange an alternative childcare arrangement. Either scenario is a positive outcome for the kid. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eezergood Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 Drop a letter to the father, anonymously, to explain the situation with pics! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubblegum Posted May 9, 2013 Author Share Posted May 9, 2013 This is NOT farangland and the sooner folk who come here realize that the better. I guess you miss the point that the kid is 50 % falang, reading is a gift. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starkey_rich Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 As much as it goes against the grain I would stay well clear of this .If anyone had an inkling it was you who grassed.Well you can imagine the rest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cooked Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 I hate to agree with David but in Thailand, more than in a lot of other countries, 'making a fuss' is to be avoided. If nobody in the neighbourhood cares, if your wife doesn't care, then you can't do much. I can imagine the police reaction: 'locked in the bathroom? I was put in a cesspit'. I would talk to the husband but don't imagine that he will welcome your 'interference'. I went through a similar experience years ago in Switzerland, nobody was interested. Sent from my iPhone using ThaiVisa app Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KarenBravo Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 The messenger always gets shot...............eventually. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patongphil Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 (edited) Tell the Dad!!! I am in a similar postion with a young girl and sometimes I too work away. I would be very pissed off in the least if no-one had the courage to tell me under the circumstances - Xxxx hope it is not me - oh yeah you said young boy. Kiddies deserve support from all and to just standby makes you in some way complicit in what is going on. Edited May 9, 2013 by metisdead 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mario2008 Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 A child has a thousand parents. If a child is in danger it is everyone's responsibility to act. But as has been said, do be careful. Interfering in family disputes can turn against you in a blink of an eye. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phuketjock Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 Can of worms from any angle, open it at your peril. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Khun Watchaporn Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 Thai problem. You no Thai. You wrong. Stay out of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubblegum Posted May 9, 2013 Author Share Posted May 9, 2013 Thai problem. You no Thai. You wrong. Stay out of it. But Daddy is not Thai so ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubblegum Posted May 9, 2013 Author Share Posted May 9, 2013 So far I see that Thai people tell me to stay out while we falang care more about the boy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itchybum Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 Tell the dad, find an anonymous way to alert him, get pics whatever and email him from obscure account. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KarenBravo Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 A child has a thousand parents. If a child is in danger it is everyone's responsibility to act. But as has been said, do be careful. Interfering in family disputes can turn against you in a blink of an eye. So...........are you saying yes, or, no?? Sounds like you are actually sitting on the fence. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Khun Watchaporn Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 Thai problem. You no Thai. You wrong. Stay out of it. But Daddy is not Thai so ? The people who are causing the problem are. Plus they are in. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Khun Watchaporn Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 (edited) So far I see that Thai people tell me to stay out while we falang care more about the boy. Who's live do you value more? Yours, or possibly the boys? Answer, then go with it. Edited May 9, 2013 by Khun Watchaporn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David48 Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 Firstly bubblegum ... do you have a Thai partner? If yes, what does he/she think of the situation with the neighbours child? What does he/she say that you should do? Is he/she unconcerned about what you see the situation is next door and you have come to the members seeking justification for your feelings if they differ from your partners? 'The boy is not the brightest I've seen' ... exactly how have you determined that? The boy is two and average development for linguistics is approximately 2 or 3 words in a sentence ... and that is presuming that he is spoken to in English at home. Huge difference between 'an illegal casino' and 'some ladies playing cards'. Yes, I know that card playing ladies can get a bit carried away. If it was an illegal casino ... don't you think the cops would discretely know about it? "At times he is even locked into the bathroom !! As not to disurb the players." ... you know this for a fact? Maybe it was for something else. If the bathroom is being used as a 'detention centre', the child will begin to fear that and taking the child to the bathroom will become an issue. Presuming this issue will be then played out when the Father takes the child to the bathroom. If the Father starts asking why the child is scared of the Bathroom, the story, as you perceive it will come out and your moral dilemma is resolved. "" Look at the poor boy he hasn't got a life !! "" ... maybe, more correctly, a life as you were raised. Well, you weren't raised in Thailand ... were you? bubblegum ... I'm not having a go at you. You are trying to rationalise in your mind and heart a situation which you perceive to be morally wrong, and to right that wrong. But, I might suggest that you are not in possession of all of the facts. If you speak Thai, then get invited to the game and get some more intel. Discretely ask around a little. If you don't speak Thai, but have a partner who does ... get them invited to the game. If you don't speak Thai, don't have a partner who agrees with your analysis of the injustice that you perceive is occurring next door ... then, I would do, as I suggested in my first post ... nothing. ... or, if you are so concerned about the child's welfare ... offer to baby-sit the kid ... problem solved! . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David48 Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 A child has a thousand parents. If a child is in danger it is everyone's responsibility to act. But as has been said, do be careful. Interfering in family disputes can turn against you in a blink of an eye. Great advice ... In Thailand. More so then in Western countries ... many hands are involved in raising a child. Neighbours become honorary Aunts (and Uncles). Sisters become mothers Grandmothers become mothers again. The advice about 'Family Disputes' should be ignored at your personal cost. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David48 Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 Actually bubblegum ... I wrote the above response as if you were the neighbour ... a flaw in my thinking. If you are not the neighbour ... just how have you discovered the information that you tell us in the OP? Have you witnessed it first hand ... or relied on someone else describing the situation to you? . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post mad mary Posted May 9, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted May 9, 2013 A kid is getting neglected and the majority of you say stay away none of your business .This beggars belief. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
candypants Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 (edited) The messenger always gets shot...............eventually. i would be willing to take the bullet if the child is truly neglected. i certainly hope someone would step up for my child, though she will never find herself in that position that said, i chose a good partner, something few here seem to do if all the stories are to be believed Edited May 9, 2013 by candypants 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David48 Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 A kid is getting neglected and the majority of you say stay away none of your business .This beggars belief. Hold on there Mary ... don't get Mad just yet. Let the OP come back with a few facts before we hung, drawn and quarter the mother of the young boy in question ... OK? . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Loptr Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 I saw a Thai woman being beaten by a male companion one day in Bangkok. A farang tried to intervene to prevent the woman from being injured any further. The woman and the man turned on the farang and began beating him. As much as it rubs against the grain, it's best to mind you own business, especially in a place like Thailand where things can go pear shaped very quickly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mad mary Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 A kid is getting neglected and the majority of you say stay away none of your business .This beggars belief. Hold on there Mary ... don't get Mad just yet. Let the OP come back with a few facts before we hung, drawn and quarter the mother of the young boy in question ... OK? . I've heard enough & I wouldn't be waiting on the blessing of a forum before I acted.If a child is at risk how long do you wait before it is to late? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David48 Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 A kid is getting neglected and the majority of you say stay away none of your business .This beggars belief. Hold on there Mary ... don't get Mad just yet. Let the OP come back with a few facts before we hung, drawn and quarter the mother of the young boy in question ... OK? . I've heard enough & I wouldn't be waiting on the blessing of a forum before I acted.If a child is at risk how long do you wait before it is to late? I wait long enough to know the facts ... . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mad mary Posted May 9, 2013 Share Posted May 9, 2013 A kid is getting neglected and the majority of you say stay away none of your business .This beggars belief. Hold on there Mary ... don't get Mad just yet. Let the OP come back with a few facts before we hung, drawn and quarter the mother of the young boy in question ... OK? . I've heard enough & I wouldn't be waiting on the blessing of a forum before I acted.If a child is at risk how long do you wait before it is to late? I wait long enough to know the facts ... . Yeah and social services did the same regarding baby peter here in the uk ...granted different country & hopefully not the same outcome. OP do what your gut /heart tells you ,folk who ignore this sometimes live to regret it.Act now,Stuff all this scaremongering .If you are concerned enough to raise it here you seem like a person that will act and not let this pass you by. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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