khunPer Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 I believe true love is possible everywhere, however when it comes to Thailand – or Southeast Asia in general – you may need to think a bit about how is was in old time back home: The husband/man is considered as the provider. Here he may even be expected to provide for more than just “his own little family”, also expected to provide some for his spouse's family. Especially when not being a young couple in hot instant love, but an “older man” searching for love – of course there are exceptions. I have met quite a number of girls and ladies, who cannot live with the one they love, as he cannot provide or not provide enough, and then decide to live with someone they “do not love, but can stay with”, one who can provide enough – and that may even work very well on long term and both parts be happy. I think the question about falling in love in Thailand is, that you cannot always be sure, when your partner says: »I love you.« However, the words are nice to hear. Remember: »Money cannot buy love, but money can buy something, which feels and looks exactly like love.« And as long as you feel the arrangement works as well as “true love”, does it matter? I look at it as a practical arrangement, where the providing part is just a part of the culture – just like old time in our Western homelands – and in return having someone to take care of me, both now and when I get old. Of course both parts respects and cares for each other. That may work extremely well – may be fifty percent love and fifty percent practical, or 70/30 – may even on long term work better than a “hot instant love”, where the fire easily burns out. I am also sure, that you may find “good girls” in the nightlife, and can meet “gold diggers” in other places where you expected to find the good girls. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
khunPer Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 Told MY WIFE about your post and she said she has 4 friends who she wants to introduce you to...(not all at once !) Never fails to amaze me that Thai women, when I meet them, ALWAYS ask me "Do you have any single farang friends for me" So true 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kikoman Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 I forgot to place in my post I have been in Thailand for 13 years and been with my wife for 10 years,( I had always stated 8 years but my wife documented it has been 10 years) could not be happier. ATTENTION!! It is very important for you to know you can never own property in Thailand. If you marry build, a house and for any reason leave, the property will be in your wife's name not yours, consider that!. If that is important to you its a point you must consider. Cheers: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChrisB87 Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 Love is only the name we give to a particular impermanent sensation that we feel on our physical structure, caused by a chemical (endorphin) sent out around the body by the brain. I am sure you may be able to accomplish this. However, i would ask you to remember the following: It is just a sensation. It is not real. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post mizztraveller Posted October 28, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted October 28, 2013 I once saw a sign in a bar in Kanchanaburi - "If you want true love in Thailand, buy a puppy"! 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kingstonkid Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 Very possible. Do not plan on finding a lady right away. My suggestion is go on the dating sites. I for one used it and it worked for me. However, I came here not expecting it to work and took it slow. We just celebrated 3 years. My suggestion is make friends here with other EXPATS and then I am sure you will be introduced to miss right by their Thai wives Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
transam Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 Very possible. Do not plan on finding a lady right away. My suggestion is go on the dating sites. I for one used it and it worked for me. However, I came here not expecting it to work and took it slow. We just celebrated 3 years. My suggestion is make friends here with other EXPATS and then I am sure you will be introduced to miss right by their Thai wives Oh no you wont.......................... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wombat Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 "True love possible?" definitely.....as long as you keep paying. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slipperylobster Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 Foolish men love quickly here. The women seem much wiser. My advice, if large amounts of money are required before a woman will consider you, then you are bound for failure. It seems that the best situation is finding a lady who can communicate well, is not in financial distress, is not ashamed to be seen with a foreign man, and is willing to try out a live-in relationship before marriage. I would rather have a lady who is similar to my age and experience, and who shares things in common. If your lady does not communicate (i.e. spends all her time on the internet/cellphone instead of talking with you, then run fast. I have had other relationships that failed, due to the absence of the aforementioned characteristics. Yes, you can find somebody here who will ..love you. I have. We are very good friends, as well....which made all the difference. Many may disagree...but if you are looking for opinions...this is mine. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Always18 Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 of course its possible. Not if you are 52 and she is 30. (Really, really not possible if you are fat, bald and an alcoholic) Sadly, it seems like Mr. FiftyTwo has some learning to do. I know from my own experience that it is entirely possible and with an even greater age gap! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sirchai Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 Will ask my wife first.- 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
little mary sunshine Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 Of course you can find true love, especially with a 25y/o bar girl in the LO$, LO$, LO$,LO$.................. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David48 Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 . . 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rascalman Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 Absolutely there are many wonderful women you can meet. But never imho do so in a bar. Go to a hospital, or somewhere to meet educated lady. They are here, I met a wonderful lady and was not looking. I think I was very lucky. I am 62 and we have been together over 5 years. Oh you are choosng a nice place that is important, as you know? All the best! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FiftyTwo Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 Very possible. Do not plan on finding a lady right away. My suggestion is go on the dating sites. I for one used it and it worked for me. However, I came here not expecting it to work and took it slow. We just celebrated 3 years. My suggestion is make friends here with other EXPATS and then I am sure you will be introduced to miss right by their Thai wives Oh no you wont.......................... My Mrs expects 10% of the total 'take', I know because I heard her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slipperylobster Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 of course its possible. Not if you are 52 and she is 30. (Really, really not possible if you are fat, bald and an alcoholic) Sadly, it seems like Mr. FiftyTwo has some learning to do. I know from my own experience that it is entirely possible and with an even greater age gap! but rare.... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FiftyTwo Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 (edited) of course its possible. Not if you are 52 and she is 30. (Really, really not possible if you are fat, bald and an alcoholic) Sadly, it seems like Mr. FiftyTwo has some learning to do. I know from my own experience that it is entirely possible and with an even greater age gap! So you are admitting to being an old, fat, bald alcoholic, with a much younger wife and it's working out? I guess anything is possible! Edited October 28, 2013 by FiftyTwo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Beetlejuice Posted October 28, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted October 28, 2013 .Useful guide to making the right choice of Thai ladies: 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MobileContent Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 I met my wife on an onlien dating site and pretended to be very poor. This was 3 years ago. I lived actually out of the pockets from her parents for almost a year and they never changed towards me. My advise tell your future girl that you are broke have no money but you love her. If she sticks with you you can move a step further. So what happened to me after one year. I paid back the loan to my FIL/MIL that have been borrowing me money for almost a year. The loan was paid by one wire transfer as I hold shares in 3 companies. I was certain that woman I full in love with I want to marry and her parents in laws are just great. We have now a son of 10 months and live couldn't be better for me. She is almost 30 years younger but I do have to mention I am her first boy friend. I just asked her recently what you love most about me and she said you are different from all the farangs and you take things very easy. I could never ever imagine of straying away from her for some other lady because I know she is the best that could come in my life. Its 3 years now and I do like to look for some red lines but they are just not coming. Oh yes house and land is in her name which she says is unfair, Bangkok condo in my name, the car I bought on finances and we have a budget of around 8000 USD but we save it offshore in Singapore in both our names as we want our son to go one day to an international school (ISB, Bangkok Pattana or Swiss German School). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bra Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 Love is only the name we give to a particular impermanent sensation that we feel on our physical structure, caused by a chemical (endorphin) sent out around the body by the brain. I am sure you may be able to accomplish this. However, i would ask you to remember the following: It is just a sensation. It is not real. The emotion you are referring to is called infatuation. It can affect all ages from teens to oldies. It lasts about 3 to 6 months and then its all over. But love is real and can follow a period of infatuation but not likely. To the OP yes you can find true love here as you can anywhere - but you most likely wont find it if you go looking for it - it finds you - and it can find you anywhere even in a bar. If you meet someone that you really like - even a bar girl (shock horror!!) take your time - a long time to be sure - and she has to do the same. I knew my wife to be for 8 years before asking her to marry me. She has a degree from a private University with straight As, is an excellent English speaker with a sharp mind and a strong sense of honesty and family. Nobody has asked for money even though I will support her as I would a wife anywhere. There is an age difference but it does work. So go to it - note the comments on this forum but in the end trust your own judgement. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FangFerang Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 Love is everywhere, actually.... Hey, that could be agreat movie! (Makes note to self..write script for Hollyweird). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andre0720 Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 Feeling true love is quite possible...if not very easy... Problem in Thailand is about reciprocity.... 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wileycoyote Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 Yes ,it is possble I wish you Good Luck . Wait till you get here and get settle down Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeijoshinCool Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 My question is it just as common to meet a nice Thai lady who simply wants a good relationship/marriage? A "good relationship/marriage" is highly dependent on financial security, regardless of the nationality. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beetlejuice Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 Love is everywhere, actually.... Hey, that could be agreat movie! (Makes note to self..write script for Hollyweird). Sorry mate, you`re too late: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nongsangcity Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 Been with my wife over 10 years and there is a 20 year age gap...we have both worked hard in England I had a job she had 2 jobs 16 hours a day 7 days a week,,we have a nice western style house in issan....all the mod cons , car , bike etc.....we have never had an argument or a fight....been a great 10 years plus,,,,and we give her family nothing....you can find a lovely women here but for every good woman there are probably 50 bad ones who would take your last baht then spit you out...you pay your money and take a chance......same in most countries .....have a good look around don't rush in to something your not sure about..... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i claudius Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 There is a 24 year age gap between my wife and I we have been together 20 odd years and have a son away in uni , we are friends ,lovers ,we laugh together and every day is a good day,yes i am 100% certain she loves me ,in the begining we liked each other and then it grew ,she did not come from a poor familly but the fact i had a buisness in BKK i am sure helped as she knew i could provide a good life ,and i liked her looks ,but in the end you move on and things just grow ,i know her only fear is that i am going to die before her , which being selfish i am glad of ,but i dread it happening ,more for her than for me. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post EyesWideOpen Posted October 28, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted October 28, 2013 (edited) Hmmmm..... They have done studies on couples who were married for many years. The idea was to find out what factors had made these couples stay together, when so many other people had divorced. The results were simple. It was based upon commonality. Meaning that if you were from roughly the same geographical area, had the same religion, spoke the same language of course, existed at about the same financial level, and had similar educational backgrounds, then that generally meant the odds of your marriage lasting a long time were good. So if you fly halfway around the world, and meet up with a Thai woman who speaks a different language, has a different religion, has a limited education background, is poor, and has a family who dreams about farang sponsors of their lovely daughter sending them money, what do you think the odds of a successful marriage are? And for the vast amount of Thai Visa posters who seem to have married a hiso Thai-Chinese girl with double majors, works for an international company making a ton of money, speaks perfect English from her overseas education, and whose family is so rich they assist you in buying a house, I will exclude you of course...... But having said that, there are some people who do in fact win the lottery. It is just that the odds are against them....... Edited October 28, 2013 by EyesWideOpen 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
how241 Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 I have a wonderful Thai wife that I have known for 13 years and have been married to for almost 11 years now. She has stuck with me through good and some very bad times as well. Major medical and financial crises alike. She had been more loyal, faithful and supportive than I imagine most western women would be. Some Thai women can be the best wife imaginable. But as others have stated: Be careful. Take your time. Get to really know her. Know her motives, plans and expectations. I guestimate that your odds of getting a good one are less than 50/50. Many are looking for a farang husband for all of the wrong reasons. A good start is looking for one who is educated and employed in a respectable line of work, one who has a relatively comfortable life without you! You don't want one who expects you to be Superman and financially rescue her entire family and village! My wife has proven without a doubt that she loves me. Not my money, not my country or my plans for the future, but she loves me. Choke dee! P.S. The one thing no man needs to bring to Thailand from another country...is a woman! Good post. Thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post beachproperty Posted October 28, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted October 28, 2013 Hmmmm..... They have done studies on couples who were married for many years. The idea was to find out what factors had made these couples stay together, when so many other people had divorced. The results were simple. It was based upon commonality. Meaning that if you were from roughly the same geographical area, had the same religion, spoke the same language of course, existed at about the same financial level, and had similar educational backgrounds, then that generally meant the odds of your marriage lasting a long time were good. So if you fly halfway around the world, and meet up with a Thai woman who speaks a different language, has a different religion, has a limited education background, is poor, and has a family who dreams about farang sponsors of their lovely daughter sending them money, what do you think the odds of a successful marriage are? And for the vast amount of Thai Visa posters who seem to have married a hiso Thai-Chinese girl with double majors, works for an international company making a ton of money, speaks perfect English from her overseas education, and whose family is so rich they assist you in buying a house, I will exclude you of course...... But having said that, there are some people who do in fact win the lottery. It is just that the odds are against them....... I guess I have to say that I find the studies faulted I was married 3 times before.....(yeah I know what a loser) anyway... The 3 prior marriages we were roughly from the same geographical area (San Francisco), had the same religion (Catholic), spoke the same language (English), were middle class to upper middle class, and were college or higher educated..........None of those marriages lasted longer than 6 years for various reasons. I have now been married to my Thai wife for 7 years (with many more to come) and She spoke little or no English when I first met her, education (4th grade ...but Ph.d in life, self educated so that she was able to become a phsyical therapist at Bumrungrad Hospital), Poor (that doesn't even come close to describing it ....live in a cinder block room with a tin roof...no bathroom).......She is absolutely the most decent, loving, kind and thoughtful person I have ever met ...I am humbled by her and grateful everyday that I am married to her... So I guess I am one of those who won the lottery 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.png.3b3332cc2256ad0edbc2fe9404feeef0.png)
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now