Why Thai women is so casual about spouse infidelity?

[sdanielmcev]

I asked my gf about this before when it was brought up in a previous post. She said, "no that's just soap operas, just like American television."

[golfer678]

my wife of 3 years told me after we were 'thai' married that she did not like sex so it was ok for me to get a mianoi...second wife. so stupid me, i did. she found out after about 2 weeks, said her heart was no good for me anymore and left. all i did was do what she told me to do.

do not fall into that trap.

after 2 years gone she came back, much to my delight. but was living with another woman at that time. as i had been up front with her from day one, telling her that i was married and if my wife came back she would have to leave. so she left and my wife came back.

the new girl sent me an sms asking how i was.

my wife read it, deleted it, said she was having lunch with a friend, came

back 2 days later and moved out, telling to get the other girl.

so, matter what they say, tell you or push you to do. DON'T.

I still have my dick and money, house, land and car but that is another story.

you are much better off staying with what you have. we had fun, she was a good cook, funny, good driver, took good care of me, watched my money closer than i did.

now i sit here alone watching law and order.

should have gotten a new sim card and number

[FlorenceM]

Oh no, you might be misunderstanding.

It's not so common here, just like everywhere in the world but naturally Thai women compromise too much and some of them lean on their spouses only.

They stay with them even they know their husbands have affairs mostly just for the sake of the children, not that they are happy about it.

They suffer, they cry like most girls in the world when sth like that happens and most of them break up or divorce in the end. (eg. my mom and dad)

That's the main reason why I don't want to be in relationship with Thai guys anymore.

My Thai ex-bf of 5 years cheated on me with his friend(she's my friend too) for a year without me knowing. You want "gik" or "mia-noi"? Go get one but without me.

I wasn't mad but I decided to break up suddenly, cried for one day and moved on.

it's common only in Thai soap opera...

[umbanda]

Oh no, you might be misunderstanding.

It's not so common here, just like everywhere in the world but naturally Thai women compromise too much and some of them lean on their spouses only.

They stay with them even they know their husbands have affairs mostly just for the sake of the children, not that they are happy about it.

They suffer, they cry like most girls in the world when sth like that happens and most of them break up or divorce in the end. (eg. my mom and dad)

That's the main reason why I don't want to be in relationship with Thai guys anymore.

My Thai ex-bf of 5 years cheated on me with his friend(she's my friend too) for a year without me knowing. You want "gik" or "mia-noi"? Go get one but without me.

I wasn't mad but I decided to break up suddenly, cried for one day and moved on.

it's common only in Thai soap opera...

Your comment is was the right response to my question. I am married with a Thai woman now. I do not cheat my wife and I believe that she do not do it neither. My experience about this topic was dating and talking with many Thai women, single and married, during 3 years.The single ones I dated always believed that I was dating other women at the same time, even if I am not so young to do that. I am 70 y.o. When I was asking why they believed in that, most of them said that they were cheated when married, and cheated when single and dating Thai men. They said that was upsetting for them, but they never cheated their husbands or partners, and only divorced when the men actions were given them big problems.

Most kept the marriage or the relationship to keep the appearances, not to upset the children or the family, .....or not to "upset" the men. Some even met the husband's lovers. One live under the same roof with her husband's younger lover, some were abused by their husband or partners. I met other women in their 50's looking for a farang husband telling me that they do not care about sex, and they do not want sex, and they will not care if their farang husbands will have lovers during marriage. And I am talking about mid class educated women. One of them is 55 y.o, and at the present time is secretary of a province's governor. Another, 60 y.o is a School Principal. Sure, they said that was in their mind all the time to meet a farang to take them out the marriage situation, not a Thai, because with any Thai men will be the same. Another woman I met, in her 40's, was a lover #3 for 15 years of an important married Thai official before its die. Its wife and lovers met many times, and were present in his funeral. Another woman in particular still my friend. She is a medical doctor, 46 years old, amazing beautiful, with a 16 years old son, married with a high rank Police officer that rarely spend the nights with the family, and openly cheat an abuse her. She never cheated her husband, but she is looking for a farang in her age and same social level to get her out of that marriage....If wasn't for that I was married with her already. We never dated. She is just a good friend now. I love my new wife...and I hope will be the last one.

I was married 3 times before, in Brazil and the US.

And...responding to many other farang concerns and opinions here...this very beautiful young Thai doctor and many Thai professional women I met in the last 3 years, are using Internet dating sites to find a farang husband. These women are not looking for a foreign "sponsors"..they are looking for real love, because they believe that farangs are not "serial" cheaters. I may be wrong, but I think they are right, and that those situations are not common in Western countries. I never cheated my ex-wives in my country, because I do not wanted for them to cheat me, and I loved them.

That's why we got divorced 3 times....before the relationship was getting so bad that cheating may happens.

I believe in equal rights....It is a Western quality or not?

Edited January 22, 2014 by umbanda

[umbanda]

Then there is the other side of the coin. A Thai wife married to a Thai man will cheat with a farang. I'm no "hunk" by any means, but have been hit on by attractive Thai women about 40 yo or so who are married. Never took them up on it. I like breathing in and out.

Happens with me too..and always will happen specially with farangs..in any country, but here, to date a married woman is a suicide adventure, for both lovers. In western culture, infidelity is a path to divorce, here is a part of marriage. Anyway.....I posted this question because I saw many Thai men talking freely about affairs, even charming other women, in front of their wives....and doing things that I cannot comment here..I was invited many times by professional Thai married men to go out with them to karaoke bars full of prostitutes.....and with wives knowledge. I come back home alone..them...the next day.

Thailand is the #1 country in the world when HIV is contracted by wives and children because spouse behavior.

I think that is a down side of their culture.

I think that is a downside of their culture. You think?

I doubt that those stats are realistically knowable anyway. In any case, the high incidence of HIV/AIDS in this country is a good reason not to 'nork jai' your wife here and not to sleep with any prostitute or anyone else's wife for that matter.

I know about this situations for some years now, and may be just a coincidence, but my wife have a beautiful young friend I met months ago at a party. She was alone, and I asked if she had a boyfriend or husband. My wife responded that she got HIV from her husband and now she is divorced. She looks good. Any man will date her if do not know or do not care about. Anyway.....Be ready to be shock...because I did when I knew, and probably few people know about this.

I was teaching in a village's Government elementary school in 2011. I had many conversations with the Thai English teacher working there. She told me that are many kids HIV+ in the school, and that only the Principal knows about because they cannot refuse or discriminate them by Government rules. She said that most of the other kid's parents do not know about.. I was surprised by this....

Sincerely, I do not know how Western countries schools deal with that. My daughters are grown women now, but...sorry.... If I know that my kids are sharing the school, plays, and food with kids, infected with HIV I will be very worry....even knowing that the risk of getting the virus is not high, or that my daughters may had the same situation in Brazil and I was unaware of that......

Realistic information only make sense sometimes when we are part of the stats...and when is too late. I had friends is Brazil and the US dead already because AIDS......and I know that I just got lucky.

[MobileContent]

My wife would chop me off if I would play around. She would never tolerate a gik on the sideline and I too wouldn't accept that.

[RecklessRon]

Then there is the other side of the coin. A Thai wife married to a Thai man will cheat with a farang. I'm no "hunk" by any means, but have been hit on by attractive Thai women about 40 yo or so who are married. Never took them up on it. I like breathing in and out.

Happens with me too..and always will happen specially with farangs..in any country, but here, to date a married woman is a suicide adventure, for both lovers. In western culture, infidelity is a path to divorce, here is a part of marriage. Anyway.....I posted this question because I saw many Thai men talking freely about affairs, even charming other women, in front of their wives....and doing things that I cannot comment here..I was invited many times by professional Thai married men to go out with them to karaoke bars full of prostitutes.....and with wives knowledge. I come back home alone..them...the next day.

Thailand is the #1 country in the world when HIV is contracted by wives and children because spouse behavior.

I think that is a down side of their culture.

I think that is a downside of their culture. You think?

I doubt that those stats are realistically knowable anyway. In any case, the high incidence of HIV/AIDS in this country is a good reason not to 'nork jai' your wife here and not to sleep with any prostitute or anyone else's wife for that matter.

I know about this situations for some years now, and may be just a coincidence, but my wife have a beautiful young friend I met months ago at a party. She was alone, and I asked if she had a boyfriend or husband. My wife responded that she got HIV from her husband and now she is divorced. She looks good. Any man will date her if do not know or do not care about. Anyway.....Be ready to be shock...because I did when I knew, and probably few people know about this.

I was teaching in a village's Government elementary school in 2011. I had many conversations with the Thai English teacher working there. She told me that are many kids HIV+ in the school, and that only the Principal knows about because they cannot refuse or discriminate them by Government rules. She said that most of the other kid's parents do not know about.. I was surprised by this....

Sincerely, I do not know how Western countries schools deal with that. My daughters are grown women now, but...sorry.... If I know that my kids are sharing the school, plays, and food with kids, infected with HIV I will be very worry....even knowing that the risk of getting the virus is not high, or that my daughters may had the same situation in Brazil and I was unaware of that......

Realistic information only make sense sometimes when we are part of the stats...and when is too late. I had friends is Brazil and the US dead already because AIDS......and I know that I just got lucky.

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IMHO: To suggest that you are worried about your child being around HIV infect people is ignorant, paranoid and harmful. Even Sesame Street is teaching that you CANNOT get HIV from being around, or hugging, someone who is HIV positive.

FYI: You ONLY get HIV from direct transfer of body fluids. You can hug a crying HIV positive person without any risk - unless you have an open cut that gets cried on! Coughing and sneezing are the same, unless you have an open wound you CANNOT become infected! And there is no evidence that it can be transferred by kissing - even open mouth-to-mouth (although it makes sense that if BOTH people have cuts in their mouths it is possible).

BTW: You are likely surrounded by infected people everywhere you go as about 2% of the people in Thailand are infected. That's 1 in every 50 people and since you probably are in contact with hundreds of people each month you will personally have direct contact with several.

Are you just as scared, for your children, of malaria, dengue fever, mosquitos, etc.? I think they are far more likely to be assaulted, molested, killed in a traffic accident or work all their lives as slave labour... some things you can really worry about!

[socksy01]

What she says is not what she means....It's a trap!

Trust me, if you play around and she finds out about it.....You're gonna have hell to pay!

If you live in Thailand......Sooner or later she will find out.

I live in Issan and once a year two mates come to Thailand from England on holiday and we spend about 4-5 nights there. When we get back my missus already has a dossier on where we've been etc. Hardly susprising the amount of 'cousin's/sister's from Issan of hers who work there. I believe Craig in that it's a trap. Have had heated arguments with my missus lately and I've been accused (100% falsely) that at first I was sh*gging my Physiotherapist and now my Golf Caddy - Insecurity basically.

[SPIKECM]

I totally agree, but It actually gets worse than this.... a Thai women can well save face after ripping you off (car in her name. land in her name) and point to your infidelity as the reason why she split. It ain't rocket science, but all these cocky guys out there thinking it is a man's world... well it isn't that simple in Thailand! If it were a man's world, why would a good chunk of the population want to be ladies?

My wife just points to the kitchen knives and then to the ducks. I assure you that not all Thai ladies aren't jealous.

The only Thai ladies that I have been "in a relationship with" who weren't jealous of other partners I may or may not have had at the same time I was with them was because they were also seeing other guys or were happy with me being a meal ticket. My wife would have my nuts for dinner if I cheated on her. Maybe you should have a closer look at your relationship.

[benalibina]

@Spikecm

So u say that many men/boys in Thailand want to become a woman to marry an infidel so they can claim the common house and car.

Interesting !!

[SPIKECM]

What I am saying is that women can get a lot further in life than men can do in Thailand. It is staggering the life change many men see in Thailand once they stick on some lipstick and a short skirt.

@Spikecm

So u say that many men/boys in Thailand want to become a woman to marry an infidel so they can claim the common house and car.
Interesting !!

[benalibina]

What I am saying is that women can get a lot further in life than men can do in Thailand. It is staggering the life change many men see in Thailand once they stick on some lipstick and a short skirt.

@Spikecm

So u say that many men/boys in Thailand want to become a woman to marry an infidel so they can claim the common house and car.

Interesting !!

I think that maybe the perceived financial benefit of a sex change will decide for those who are in doubt to actually undergo the transformation. Only secondary i guess. Primary reason is IMO that they feel more feminin than masculin.

[danmarnj]

Cuz she's only interested in your money and she doesn't care if you get it eleswhere maybe?

She may be only interested in money, but does not want another woman who may take that away from her

[SPIKECM]

The vast majority have never had a sex change operation. Most have only taken pills to enlarge their breasts. Investment can be limited to a silicone filled bra and some lipstick.

What I am saying is that women can get a lot further in life than men can do in Thailand. It is staggering the life change many men see in Thailand once they stick on some lipstick and a short skirt.

@Spikecm

So u say that many men/boys in Thailand want to become a woman to marry an infidel so they can claim the common house and car.
Interesting !!

I think that maybe the perceived financial benefit of a sex change will decide for those who are in doubt to actually undergo the transformation. Only secondary i guess. Primary reason is IMO that they feel more feminin than masculin.

[glegolo]

I have never ever before even heard about such a thai lady... very strange... trolling????

Glegolo

[Tacho De Lao]

Then there is the other side of the coin. A Thai wife married to a Thai man will cheat with a farang. I'm no "hunk" by any means, but have been hit on by attractive Thai women about 40 yo or so who are married. Never took them up on it. I like breathing in and out.

Happens with me too..and always will happen specially with farangs..in any country, but here, to date a married woman is a suicide adventure, for both lovers. In western culture, infidelity is a path to divorce, here is a part of marriage. Anyway.....I posted this question because I saw many Thai men talking freely about affairs, even charming other women, in front of their wives....and doing things that I cannot comment here..I was invited many times by professional Thai married men to go out with them to karaoke bars full of prostitutes.....and with wives knowledge. I come back home alone..them...the next day.

Thailand is the #1 country in the world when HIV is contracted by wives and children because spouse behavior.

I think that is a down side of their culture.

They put up with it more when you take care of them well(financially) its all tied to that and yes some acceptance of what is part of the culture. Why to you think there are so many karoke bars and massage places here? For the married guys. Mia noi anyone(if you can afford one) No thanks, one wife is enough.

[a99az]

Think it's just you who's having wishful thoughts. If your wife truly loved you she would, I think be hurt, if she knew you was out getting your leg over.

[namatjira]

Can not be sure but I was told that Thailand has the greatest number of dicks getting the chop because of

infidelity, so yes, this is the hub of dick removals, if we add the ones that pay for it from a doctor the figures

would go off the scale......maybe a good surgeon could do a transplant, plenty of organ donors out there.

worth a try if yours goes out the window and the soi dog is too quick.........

Thailand worlds number one, gold medal in fact, maybe the surgeons could introduce a new operation,

they could call it an addadicktome

[danmarnj]

I had a thai lady who just wasnt interested in sex. When we first met, she would prance topless and have sex frequently. After we were together for a bit, she said she is not interested in sex, but to get farang bf, need to give sex quick.

She said I could have a gik or mia noi, but she needs to approve of the lady

[IMA_FARANG]

Oh dear.

I better not comment.

I am 67 years old, going on 68 in a few months.

And, not to be rude, but I have learned there are two things you NEVER say or ask your wife.

• If she asks you if one of her female friends is "pretty" you never answer yes
• And you never ask her about any"boyfriends" she had before she met you

No matter what she says, lie to her about those two subjects.

Otherwise it's like lighting a match in a room full of gunpowder.

[paz]

• And you never ask her about any"boyfriends" she had before she met you

No matter what she says, lie to her about those two subjects.

Please tell me how one can lie in regard to not ask a question ?

Edited March 27, 2014 by paz

[tropo]

What she says is not what she means....It's a trap!

Trust me, if you play around and she finds out about it.....You're gonna have hell to pay!

If you live in Thailand......Sooner or later she will find out.

Yeah, but more times than not it has nothing to do with jealousy (or love), but protecting her nest egg. She's got to keep other hands out of her money pot.

[ALFREDO]

Then there is the other side of the coin. A Thai wife married to a Thai man will cheat with a farang. I'm no "hunk" by any means, but have been hit on by attractive Thai women about 40 yo or so who are married. Never took them up on it. I like breathing in and out.

Happens with me too..and always will happen specially with farangs..in any country, but here, to date a married woman is a suicide adventure, for both lovers. In western culture, infidelity is a path to divorce, here is a part of marriage. Anyway.....I posted this question because I saw many Thai men talking freely about affairs, even charming other women, in front of their wives....and doing things that I cannot comment here..I was invited many times by professional Thai married men to go out with them to karaoke bars full of prostitutes.....and with wives knowledge. I come back home alone..them...the next day.

Thailand is the #1 country in the world when HIV is contracted by wives and children because spouse behavior.

I think that is a down side of their culture.

You see the everywhere popping up 24 hour open, small Bungalow style resorts-with tiny cheap rooms, but often room service, in the middle of nowhere!

There is a reason they exist!

[benalibina]

• And you never ask her about any"boyfriends" she had before she met you

No matter what she says, lie to her about those two subjects.

Please tell me how one can lie in regard to not ask a question ?

He must have meant.... never confirm that u have slept around when ur wife asks u......always say no.

[benalibina]

I had a thai lady who just wasnt interested in sex. When we first met, she would prance topless and have sex frequently. After we were together for a bit, she said she is not interested in sex, but to get farang bf, need to give sex quick.

She said I could have a gik or mia noi, but she needs to approve of the lady

More to the story ?

[mmh8]

I have had this conversation with the wife many times.I usualy explain I want to do things the Thai way. I am not sure if she is serious or not about it being natural.

[mmh8]

Then there is the other side of the coin. A Thai wife married to a Thai man will cheat with a farang. I'm no "hunk" by any means, but have been hit on by attractive Thai women about 40 yo or so who are married. Never took them up on it. I like breathing in and out.

Happens with me too..and always will happen specially with farangs..in any country, but here, to date a married woman is a suicide adventure, for both lovers. In western culture, infidelity is a path to divorce, here is a part of marriage. Anyway.....I posted this question because I saw many Thai men talking freely about affairs, even charming other women, in front of their wives....and doing things that I cannot comment here..I was invited many times by professional Thai married men to go out with them to karaoke bars full of prostitutes.....and with wives knowledge. I come back home alone..them...the next day.

Thailand is the #1 country in the world when HIV is contracted by wives and children because spouse behavior.

I think that is a down side of their culture.

No you will find African countries where this is much worse. At least in the majoirty of cases if the HIV s contracted it is not from forcing people.

[Thai at Heart]

You are very very very naive.

[Scarpolo]

I too marvel at Thai womens view of sex and fidelity . Prostitution is seen as a legitimate source of income , not as something to be frowned on .

My wife started combing Thai dating sites for a man for a widowed friend . Then she started looking for a rich man for herself , getting me to write to

them or write the chat . Eventually she found one coming to Thailand who wanted to date her . She had been doing this so long that I felt she needed to

get it out of her system . I let her go two times for a couple of nights each with an elderly man , but insisted that she got money or more discreetly gold. The first time she got a 2bt necklace and the second time a 1bt bracelet to match . I said to her that's prostitution , what's that she said . The man

thought he'd been talked out of a lot of money and didn't ask her again . My wife is post menopause and doesn't like sex , so he didn't get much joy out of it .

If I was to go with another woman , my wife would be so jealous , she tell me to pack my bags and leave , go back to your own country .

thats pretty disgusting,

and, you are a lousy pimp

[Scarpolo]

I too marvel at Thai womens view of sex and fidelity . Prostitution is seen as a legitimate source of income , not as something to be frowned on .

My wife started combing Thai dating sites for a man for a widowed friend . Then she started looking for a rich man for herself , getting me to write to

them or write the chat . Eventually she found one coming to Thailand who wanted to date her . She had been doing this so long that I felt she needed to

get it out of her system . I let her go two times for a couple of nights each with an elderly man , but insisted that she got money or more discreetly gold. The first time she got a 2bt necklace and the second time a 1bt bracelet to match . I said to her that's prostitution , what's that she said . The man

thought he'd been talked out of a lot of money and didn't ask her again . My wife is post menopause and doesn't like sex , so he didn't get much joy out of it .

If I was to go with another woman , my wife would be so jealous , she tell me to pack my bags and leave , go back to your own country .

Wow, pretty bizarre. Your wife is doing the deed with other men and you're cool with that. Interesting.

what is truly unbelievable about his story, is, he actually wants us to believe that his wife starting cruising the dating sites "for a friend"

I am starting to understand some of the thai - farange horror stories now