Hi so so what

[Kangawallafox]

Since joining I see so much talk about half Chinese hi so girls, not my flavour being a middle class guy but each to his own, not a racial thing but Chinese girls don't really do it for me.

People seem to place girls here into two categories sometimes, bg or hi so, if you say your partners not a bg you are accused of lying, if you say she is hi so your accused of lying, the reality is most woman I feel are just normal woman working normal everyday jobs, middle class respectable people.

My wife was an accountant, hard working but certainly by no means hi so if you check the salary in Los for accountants, she lived in your typical one room apartment with a bathroom, it was not to bad she done ok but was certainly not even remotely in the shadow of hi so.

Hi society means nothing, hi respect does, my wife's isaan parents began with little, their house still looks like your typical isaan disaster as I'm in no position to by a new one, but through hard work in a decent restaurant they set up years back they put their four children through uni.

Like all families they have ups and downs, one son who graduated and became an engineer is in prison, the other graduated law school and became a monk, well suited to it he will be a monk for life I believe, certainly not suited to law,lol, the sister is in marketing, are they special, not really they earn but they will never be rich, but they are happy.

What is this thread about, a shout out to her amazing parents and their achievements, with nothing they created a path for their children, worked ridiculously hard for their children's future, this is what the average isaan parent is about, they are very strict parents, normal parents, the average isaan people deserve more respect, I could not do what her parents done.

Most people here I believe are with normal girls, if they are with a hi so girls or a bg it means little, at the end of the day it's about the relationship and the bond between the two, class does not make a relationship, regardless of how high you aim if it fails you all end up at the bottom, it's about love.

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[cornishcarlos]

Not just Isaan parents...

Even in South there are normal hard working families too

[HooHaa]

the term hi so used on this board is simply a misnomer. the fact remains that the vast majority of foreigners in thailand don't even get close to any true thai "hi-so".

you must either be very wealthy yourself, or have a connection through business, or have attended school with them abroad or all of the above to have an in.

the true high so moves in very rarefied air.

Edited January 23, 2014 by HooHaa

[MegaRanter]

The engineer is building cages in prison or living in one. I expected you should have kicked in a bit more flesh in that zone.

I avoid married women like plaque, don't care whether bg or hiso.

My MIL is the worst mother you can wish on anyone. Whenever I am talking with my ex and we start getting carried and being too nice to each other, I bring her mom in to the talk, and she will hurriedly have to attend to something else.

[Kangawallafox]

Not just Isaan parents...

Even in South there are normal hard working families too

To true, traveling between regions I see little difference, the good and the bad.

I would also like to apologise to a member publicly on line who shared his story a week ago about his wife, I came across as an ass in the way I responded, I was not questioning her morals or relationship or her work so much, I was questioning wether she made the right choices and could have got out sooner, the way I answered however did not at all indicate this and was outright rude, cannot remember his name I will look back, it's true I have not walked in her shoes and should have shut my mouth.

Sometime ego gets the better of me, being a former fighter I get defensive, you cannot smack people online so I get frustrated and attack, it's a weakness I'm working on.

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[Kangawallafox]

The engineer is building cages in prison or living in one. I expected you should have kicked in a bit more flesh in that zone.

I avoid married women like plaque, don't care whether bg or hiso.

My MIL is the worst mother you can wish on anyone. Whenever I am talking with my ex and we start getting carried and being too nice to each other, I bring her mom in to the talk, and she will hurriedly have to attend to something else.

Oh he is living in one, with good reason to he was certainly not innocent, attempted murder.

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[Kangawallafox]

the term hi so used on this board is simply a misnomer. the fact remains that the vast majority of foreigners in thailand don't even get close to any true thai "hi-so".

you must either be very wealthy yourself, or have a connection through business, or have attended school with them abroad or all of the above to have an in.

the true high so moves in very rarefied air.

Hi so people are not necessarily more respectable though, some are of coarse but they are just people.

The problem with hi so girls is if I got one I would feel out of place, we both would, not a moral issue, not a case of who is better one of the sweetest girls I know sweeps the floors in big c, I am just worlds apart with hi so girls.

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Edited January 23, 2014 by Kangawallafox

[Kangawallafox]

I guess what im saying is class means nothing, all classes have good and bad, it's the woman, honourable, respectful, honest and loving.

That can come in any class, you can not choose love, love chooses you.

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[howerde]

'Hi so' Thai would not be interested in any farang, let alone date one, big loss of face, i wold imagine it would be like an immigrant dating an upper class socialite here in the uk. The nearest i got was filling their champagne flutes at Henley Regatta,

Edited January 23, 2014 by howerde

[Kangawallafox]

'Hi so' Thai would not be interested in any farang, let alone date one, big loss of face, i wold imagine it would be like an immigrant dating an upper class socialiate here in the uk.

Would they date a hi so farang, or could they resist if they were truly in love, hard to walk away.

Or would a farang want to date a girl with that stuck up hi so attitude, why date a hi so at all, just date the girl you fall in love with regardless of who or what she is.

My wife's sister has a man who is on tv in Thailand, he has so many woman after him, people always asking for his autograph when we are out, it could be said my wife's sister is lower class then him, she has a good job but she is not hi so by any stretch of the imagination, they are so happy, would have been a mistake if he left her because she is an amazing partner to him, very good woman.

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Edited January 23, 2014 by Kangawallafox

[Satcommlee]

'Hi so' Thai would not be interested in any farang, let alone date one, big loss of face, i wold imagine it would be like an immigrant dating an upper class socialite here in the uk. The nearest i got was filling their champagne flutes at Henley Regatta,

Exactly, Hi-So's don't date Farangs!

Except MY wife of course :-)

Edited January 23, 2014 by Satcommlee

[howerde]

I doubt any farang would ever meet let alone move in hi so circles, it's not money it's your family history that matters in the uk and Thailand, maybe different in places like usa, you simply can not buy you way in. of course Thai visa posters only marrry' hi so or medium so' woman who just happened to pop into a pattay bar,

[Kangawallafox]

I do recall a very hi so gathering, a bday party for their dog, they had a cake and everything, the cake was a pig in a bikini and the hi so woman was in a g string and topless whilst being served by hotel staff poolside.

Hi so does not mean respectable, I will take respectable first anyday, that sweet girl who is a friend I know who cleans the shitters at big c, she would never do anything like that.

Good and bad in all classes, hi class does not mean better.

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Edited January 23, 2014 by Kangawallafox

[cornishcarlos]

'Hi so' Thai would not be interested in any farang, let alone date one, big loss of face, i wold imagine it would be like an immigrant dating an upper class socialite here in the uk. The nearest i got was filling their champagne flutes at Henley Regatta,

Exactly, Hi-So's don't date Farangs!

Except MY wife of course :-)

I'd be keeping an eye on her if that is the case

[Kangawallafox]

I doubt any farang would ever meet let alone move in hi so circles, it's not money it's your family history that matters in the uk and Thailand, maybe different in places like usa, you simply can not buy you way in. of course Thai visa posters only marrry' hi so or medium so' woman who just happened to pop into a pattay bar,

That's my point, you are of the opinion all tv members are with bg, why.

Bit of a generalisation.

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[howerde]

I doubt any farang would ever meet let alone move in hi so circles, it's not money it's your family history that matters in the uk and Thailand, maybe different in places like usa, you simply can not buy you way in. of course Thai visa posters only marrry' hi so or medium so' woman who just happened to pop into a pattay bar,

That's my point, you are of the opinion all tv members are with bg, why.

Bit of a generalisation.

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That was a bit tongue in cheek, only kidding, but the Ho so dog party. are these really hi so people or just peasants with money,, i use the peasants in a joking way,, Why worry if you are happy go with it, i am open to an invite to any hi so function

[Ajaan]

I do recall a very hi so gathering, a bday party for their dog, they had a cake and everything, the cake was a pig in a bikini and the hi so woman was in a g string and topless whilst being served by hotel staff poolside.

Hi so does not mean respectable, I will take respectable first anyday, that sweet girl who is a friend I know who cleans the shitters at big c, she would never do anything like that.

Good and bad in all classes, hi class does not mean better.

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That video you saw--it's infamous--was not just of "a very hi so gathering," it was a video of members of a certain Thai family that we are not allowed to discuss on TV, at least not in relation to things like that video. I suggest that unless you want to get banned, you don't mention it again.

[howerde]

I do recall a very hi so gathering, a bday party for their dog, they had a cake and everything, the cake was a pig in a bikini and the hi so woman was in a g string and topless whilst being served by hotel staff poolside.

Hi so does not mean respectable, I will take respectable first anyday, that sweet girl who is a friend I know who cleans the shitters at big c, she would never do anything like that.

Good and bad in all classes, hi class does not mean better.

Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect Thailand

That video you saw--it's infamous--was not just of "a very hi so gathering," it was a video of members of a certain Thai family that we are not allowed to discuss on TV, at least not in relation to things like that video. I suggest that unless you want to get banned, you don't mention it again.

I take back my peasant comment, then. oops

Edited January 23, 2014 by howerde

[MAJIC]

Hi So ? I really don't know if I have met any in Thailand,I have met Rich people,who lacked that intangible Sparkle,which I would call HiSo.

In the UK I have met many true HiSo's who do not flaunt wealth or power,they have a definite charm and allure about them that radiates,they don't look down their nose at you,neither do they Lord it over you,in fact quite the opposite,they have a definite interest in you as a person and love to hear about your life.They can talk on any level,and be as interested in what you have to say,as if you are the only person worth having a conversation with,in the room.

I suspect,Thai so called HiSo's would be a long way from this kind of person! HiSo is not just about wealth!

[howerde]

Hi So ? I really don't know if I have met any in Thailand,I have met Rich people,who lacked that intangible Sparkle,which I would call HiSo.

In the UK I have met many true HiSo's who do not flaunt wealth or power,they have a definite charm and allure about them that radiates,they don't look down their nose at you,neither do they Lord it over you,in fact quite the opposite,they have a definite interest in you as a person and love to hear about your life.They can talk on any level,and be as interested in what you have to say,as if you are the only person worth having a conversation with,in the room.

I suspect,Thai so called HiSo's would be a long way from this kind of person! HiSo is not just about wealth!

Indeed sir, you have hit the nail on the head, That is class. Even when one elderly gentleman at Henley addressed me as 'boy' ( i was 28 at the time) it was done it such a way he simply oozed class. that i was after a decent tip

Edited January 23, 2014 by howerde

[Thai at Heart]

'Hi so' Thai would not be interested in any farang, let alone date one, big loss of face, i wold imagine it would be like an immigrant dating an upper class socialite here in the uk. The nearest i got was filling their champagne flutes at Henley Regatta,

Exactly, Hi-So's don't date Farangs!

Except MY wife of course :-)

An extremely upper class woman married a farang. Just look at tablet, some mixed marriages there.

Question is, would you want to marry them. They aren't exactly low maintenance and if you think they are any smarter than the average you will me very disappointed.

[impulse]

You guys are forgetting the old Jewish Lutheran proverb:

You can marry more money in 5 minutes than you can make in a lifetime.

Even women with a 3rd grade education know that.

Edited January 23, 2014 by impulse

[Douggie Style]

Some great honest comments here..(rare occurrence lol)

I feel a foreigner gets an opportunity to move through different classes ...perhaps an opportunity not open at home

this can be exciting....but after the gloss fades, it boils down to the quality of the person and how you conduct yourself in your own life...

more so the point of life is to make a nice life/environment around you and for those you care about...

i feel the west has well and truly lost the plot and lost the value of the human connections ..in the end this is what we are..who really cares what stuff you have?

all the hiso stuff is just a bit of fluff that soon passes...

through luck i am in a position where I can mix with people across the board and do see both sides...more similar than different

PS i was in pattaya for this new year, with my family, we were graciously and kindly treated as guests by the owners of many famous businesses.... and they were extremely lovely classy people btw...justr hanging out with their families enjoying NYD...that surreal experience was contrasted by seeing a lot of guys on bar stools staring across at a beach long since covered in those tarp covered stalls... it seemed they have no connections.. that may be wrong...but why travel across the world to do this....we each make our own life...it crystallized a theme...we seem to have become so fearful and paranoid we have lost the joy of connecting with other humans for simple friendship..

Edited January 23, 2014 by Douggie Style

[impulse]

.we each make our own life...it crystallized a theme...we seem to have become so fearful and paranoid we have lost the joy of connecting with other humans for simple friendship..

+1

Note to self. Never buy grapes in Thailand. Too many people say they're sour...

[jaideecm]

Here are my observations and experiences living in Thailand for more than 25 years.

Thai lady’s occupations and their dating practices:

Thai ladies have different needs depending on their background, education or work ethic and date accordingly. Some ladies live alone, some live with their children and others live with family or friends. How they live is a big factor on who they date and what they are looking for in a mate. In this chapter I will try to explain the differences in the types of Thai ladies looking to marry western men and the type of guy they are looking for.

Career Oriented Women

The career minded Thai lady is well educated and work driven. She either works for a large firm or company where she can advance to the top or owns her own business. Many work in sales for large companies and can make their own time to meet men. They drive nice cars and live in a nice house or apartment. Most have never been married nor have children so they have money to travel and go out. The age range is around 28 years old or older and they dress well and are very attractive.

The Business Thai lady is well educated, bright and studied at the finest universities in Thailand and many studied abroad. Some speak English very well and some do not speak anything but Thai. When they go out for fun they go with their lady friends or colleagues from work. These ladies adore white skin so if you enjoy outdoor activities in the daytime, beach and sun they are not your type. They are from wealthy families and have their position in their work because their family groomed them for the job. They either work in the family business or for a friend of the family. When it comes to a boyfriend or mate they would rather have a wealthy Thai businessman and usually not marry until she is over 35 years old. These are the hardest ladies for a western man to get close to. The western man has to live in Thailand and have high status such as a college professor, CEO of a large company or foreign government official.

My encounter with a Thai lady professional was in 1991 when I was working at Payap University in Chiang Mai as an advisor for the Mass Communications Department. I started in 1989 and the university gave free Thai language and culture classes 3 days a week, which I attended. I had to dress smart and look sharp every day and follow Thai customs and traditions.

On a Saturday I went to a Thai handicraft festival at Chiang Mai Land with a couple of Thai friends when one beautiful well dressed and sexy lady caught my eye. She worked behind a counter selling jewelry so I left my friends and made conversation with her in Thai as she couldn’t speak English. We talked for a couple of hours and I went and bought Thai food for her to eat while she was working. I went back the next day and visited her until they packed up their booth and left back to Bangkok. She was working in the family business with their main jewelry store in Bangkok while her and brother traveled around going to trade shows.

To make a long story short we saw each other almost every weekend for months. When she traveled to North Thailand I would go with them to the trade shows all over the north then I got invited to her home in Bangkok. Her home was very large with 2 Mercedes in the driveway. They put me up in their spare bedroom and her family and I ate together, they told me about their business and we talked all weekend.

The next weekend she visited me at my home in Chiang Mai driving all night to meet me in the morning. We had breakfast then she made Love to me. We were intimate all weekend long, whereas before I couldn’t even touch her, then she dropped the bomb. She said “My father wants us to marry but you have to move to Bangkok and work in the family business exporting our jewelry”. I told her I would think about. I never heard from her or could talk with her again.

I did run into her 2 years later in a shopping mall in Chiang Mai. I asked her why I couldn’t talk with her after that day. She said her father says if I didn’t go right away to work with the family and marry her I never would. She was now married to a Thai man and had an 8 month old baby. Lesson learned.

Government Worker

Thai ladies who work in Government service such as teachers, nurses, government offices again are well educated. They are very dedicated to their job and have very little time for dating or going out. On weekends and holidays they have to work with children, prepare for festivals, giving vaccinations in small villages. They also have to cater to high government officials, members of parliament and Royal Family visits.

Most do not speak English unless they teach the language. Many are not married nor have children as they have little time to meet men. Many go online to meet western men on social web sites. They do not drink and are very obedient when it comes to Thai and Buddhist traditions and customs. They are family oriented and most live at home with their parents, brothers and sisters and their families.

The government lady worker enjoys the outdoors, camping and outdoor group activities. They are very family oriented and like men that enjoy staying home with children, no drinking or smoking, must know Thai and Buddhist culture and customs and also be willing to live with their family. These ladies are probably the best wife a man in Thailand could have if you are willing to live by their high moral standards.

I met a school teacher at a temple in far North Thailand where I was teaching English in 1994. She lived in Bangkok and we visited each other many times in both Chiang Mai and Bangkok. I stayed with her family of 11 persons in 1 large home when I went to Bangkok. Most of the time while visiting her on weekends I went with her to decorate temples, help her decorate floats for parades and went on scout trips with her and her students. We married in 1995 and before we married I asked if she would move to Chiang Mai within 1year after being married and she said yes. We did marry in Bangkok but divorced 6 years later as after all those years she never came to visit me in Chiang Mai. We agreed to divorce because she did not want to leave her family in Bangkok and I just could not live in a house with 11 people. We are still friends.

I have also dated a government nurse. The problem with a nurse is we never saw each other. Her working 14 hour days and weekends is the normal practice with little time for meals together or even talking to each other on the phone.

Service workers

Service workers include are those who work in restaurants, hair salons, hotel worker, tour guide, and retail sales persons. These ladies are probably the easiest nice girls to meet as they are in the public daily. Their ages are from mid 20s to 40. Most have at least 1 child and divorced. They work about 12 hours a day and get 1 day off a week and get a salary plus commission and/or tips. Many speak English but some do not. I talk about meeting and dating a service worker later in the book.

In 2002 I met a Thai lady who worked at a seafood restaurant in Phuket. I visited Phuket several time over the next year although I live in Chiang Mai. I visited her at the restaurant every day I was there. I made sure I went during slow business hours so we could talk. One day when I went to Phuket and the restaurant the staff told me she went back home to Udorn Thani. They were nice enough to give me her phone number, which the girl I went to visit requested them to do.

I called her and she asked if I would go visit her family there in Udorn and I said I would. I took a flight the next day and checked into a hotel then called her. She was very excited that I went to see her and then she invited me to her home. I had dinner that evening at their home and invited her, her sister and mother to come visit me in Chiang Mai. The next day the four of us flew to Chiang Mai where I put them up in a hotel at the night bazaar, showed them my home and around the area for 3 days.

Two weeks later I return to Udorn and asked if their daughter to come to live with me and Chiang Mai and they said OK. 2 days later she moved in with me and we stayed together for 6 years. I sent her to school to learn English and she work with me in my bakery and my tour company. Her English and business skills were great after all these years together.

One night she asked me if she could live alone as she always had someone to take care of her and had an idea to start her own business. I said that was up to her and that I Loved her and not to be a stranger. She now has her own dress and shoe shop in Pattaya and doing an excellent business. She works very hard and says she doesn’t need a man any more (now 43 years old) but we do get together at times and are very good friends.

Hill Tribe Girls

Many hill tribe ladies work in restaurants. Hill Tribe Ladies make very nice wives if this is what you are looking for but not as a girlfriend. They want to get married quickly and you will not be able to have contact with any other ladies or hang out with previous friends. Going to a pub or bar is out of the question and drinking is allowed during their festivals when the whole village drinks homemade whiskey. They are very strict and bossy with little or no patience. Everything has to be their way or no way. Also you will have to live in her village and build a nice house for her family.

I dated a Lisu Hill tribe girl but very briefly. She worked at a noodle restaurant and was very sweet when we were together dating in the city. When I visited her home and family for 2 days with a Thai male friend (we stayed at bungalows near the village) and when one of my female tour guides called me she was very angry saying I could not talk to girls. The next day my female tour manager called me and the Lisu girl went ballistic asking why I am talking to so many girls. My Thai friend (one of my tour company drivers) and I tried to explain to her I have to talk to my manager and guides and I was only talking business. She told me to go away and never come back, wow what a shock. Her parents were angry with her and wanted me to stay for dinner but we left thinking am I glad I didn’t get involved with this girl.

Bar Girl and Escort

These ladies should be just for fun and never get serious with. Most are from poor families with very little education and many have children and their husband or boyfriend left them. They have to take care of their family and being a bar girl is the fastest way to make money. Child support here in Thailand is unheard of so the guys can get away with fathering a child then leave for a younger girl with no children. Some girls have a Thai boyfriend or husband they go home to every night and others have many boyfriends that live all around the world and send them money. The western boyfriends will come visit her for a few months a year and she will make sure they guys never meet or know about each other.

Living in Thailand for more than 25 years I have visited my share of bars and pubs. I have many lady friends who are bar girls but never leave the bar with them. I buy them a few drinks for their company and ask questions about their life which is very sad. Many Ladies have children that are handicapped or mentally challenged. Other ladies have been raped by a family member and kicked out of their home to make money for the family. These ladies have serious problems and NOT marrying material.

[wym]

I do recall a very hi so gathering, a bday party for their dog, they had a cake and everything, the cake was a pig in a bikini and the hi so woman was in a g string and topless whilst being served by hotel staff poolside.

Hi so does not mean respectable, I will take respectable first anyday, that sweet girl who is a friend I know who cleans the shitters at big c, she would never do anything like that.

Good and bad in all classes, hi class does not mean better.

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I would suggest if you or someone you know has a file of that video sitting on a device that you/they delete it ASAP. Possession of such could get you into some serious trouble.

[abhaya]

Why should you car what other people think?

[oogster8]

Seems a lot of guys go for the hill tribe girls. The girl is in charge no doubt. You can see them in bkk. The farang looks like a pet following the boss around.

[belg]

yes but here, if you marry the poor girl, as if they are none in USA/UK/EUROPE? (poor ones i mean), they do not expect to retire instantly and get a smash of cash & gold, just for taking up their daughter

in western world, you raise your children and do nott expect to SELL them !!!!!!!

[tyler2208]

I think the problem is that the term "hi so" gets missused to often here.

More often than not, when a farang sais his g/f or wife is Hi So, the truth is more likely to be that she is a normal middle class lady.

For example my wife is head of a private hospital here, very well educated and comes from a good honest, hard working family. She looks Chinese/Thai because she has very white skin but she is 100% Thai (to her knowledge).

Yet my wife is not High-so, at least I dont consider her to be.

She is a normal hard working educated middle class lady.

The issue is that, there are a lot of farangs dating or married to very low class, uneducated poor women.

When farangs sometimes compare normal middle class to low class women or bargirls/prostitutes, the normal middle class women is often upgraded (incorrectly) by some farangs to "Hi-So" status.

Even some Thai's (poorer or lower class ones) will label a well dressed, well spoken thai with a good job and a good income as "Hi-so" even though in most cases it is not true.

The other part of the problem is the underlying competetive attitude between some farangs here, "the mine is better or bigger than yours" battle, which can often lead to gross over exagerations on some peoples part.

I can understand why so many farangs like to make it clear that they are not dating or married to bargirls or prostitutes, thats be honest it's a horrible stigma to have.

It is no secret, in fact I would go as far as to say that it's common knowledge that farangs on the whole are perceived to be connoisseurs of low class women by many in Thailand and i guess if we are honest it is teue to the lesser extent.

I am not knocking anyone who dates low class or uneducated women, even bargirls and prostitutes, after all it's their life and up to them, I dont understand why farang men would want to date such women, but I dont need to understand because it's none of ny business.

I do however understand or relate to farangs who do not wish to be tarred with the same brush, or have people assume that because they are a farang, then there girlfriend can only be a poor uneducated bar girl.

I have grown up here since I was. kid, have full Thai nationality, but I am still a farang and sometimes people that dont know us will surley make assumptions about me and my wife, which is really annoying for both of us.

I have never even been in a farang type bar or go go bar, let alone had a conversation with a bar girl of prostitute, but because I'm a farang people assume that I have.

My wife put her self through university and has worked hard all her life, yes she is now enjoying a relativley high sallary but she had to work very very hard to get this stage, so if someone is to assume she is with me for money, or to be assumed to be an ex bar girl is the ultimate insult to her.

So to summerise I persnally would not claim my wife to be anymore than she actually is, a hard working, well educated MIDDLE class Thai lady, nothing more nothing less.

But I realise that as long as many farangs are subjected to the stigma of people assuming their g/f / wives are poor uneducated bar girls or prostitutes, when they actually not, then there will be those that feel the need to embellish the status of their ladies.

Thailand, just like any other country has a broad mixture of women, low class, middle class and of course high class (hi-so).

Obviously the low class ones are easier to get for obvious reasons (maybe why so many farangs end up with these types)

the middle and high class ones are going to take more effort on the mans part to "get the girl" so to speak" (not money, for the genuine middle class ones).

So to answer then OP'S questions, there is every type of women available in thailand, that you would expect to find in any other country the world over,

the question is, is the OP willing to put the effort in to get the type he wants.