How important is quality sex to you when choosing a partner?

[topt]

havent you ever heard of teaching them, if they dont know or have never been shown what do you expect. It is pretty easy to do, if you show her how to enjoy it herself and not just jump on and do the busines and jump off leaving her high and dry she will pick it up. Some women just lie there and this totally kills any passion(probably men that do the equivelent), if they get to enjoy it they will adjust they way they react, just try taking your time, talk to her about it and show here exactly how good it can be. When I was young it was just a matter of getting my rocks off but as you grow older and marry you learn that feelings play a big part and start to make sure your partner gets just as much enjoyment as you, maybe with a lot of happy endings she will really take to it.

This is my whole point….yes, I could teach her but if the sexual desire for any partner is completely absent on her part, what can teaching accomplish? I only ask this because I genuinely care about her and I need a partner who doesn't make me stray to the bar.

That's a big problem I have in Thailand. I don't put the effort into a relationship that I would back home because I know if she's not willing to put out, I can just buy great sex for 1000 baht.

In this case, she's beautiful and intelligent but she even admits she has a problem with no sex drive and always had the same problem in past relationships.

I don't know if I take time, can she change or is this something set from birth and no amount of time will fix the lack of desire. She said all the time she's alone, not once has she even contemplated touching herself which sort of tells me she just doesn't have the required libido for holding off the bar girls in a long term relationship.

I think it is completely dependant on how important it is to you.

Depending on how long you have been in the relationship if you are not happy with this, or can see you won't be, then as another poster already said you know the answer. You will stray. I had similar issue in the UK years ago and ended up ending the relationship after 4 years - and should have done it sooner..

[alanrchase]

Why does anyone want to discuss their "Significant partner" on a forum

"

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[Showbags]

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The rent-a-doll sex can be pretty good if you make it appear that there might be a future together and she develops real feelings for you. Then you are no longer the customer but a potential partner (in her thinking anyways) and the sex can be great.

I wasn't talking about how well she performs.

But thats all that matters innit ?

[HeavyDrinker]

I can't believe what I'm reading here....are some of you guys really so emotionally stunted? When you hold whatever woman (or man) after sex and you know, know it's right then nothing else matters...

Edited March 18, 2014 by HeavyDrinker

[thailiketoo]

This is why you should try the goods as soon as possible, who wants to have bird that's a crap ride?

They say one should never squeeze the goods until you have paid.

Some guys never pay. Some guys never squeeze.

[alanrchase]

I am having a problem with post. The poster does not rwply.

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[kurnell]

Let's be honest, it's gonna turn crap after a year or 2 anyway, so better to go with a girl that has money or a sister that gives out

[Neurath]

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I like the way the OP makes the woman a Thai just so that this subject is Thai related, but I`ll take the bait anyway.

Depends on the guy. I know guys that sexually, lost their labidos in their early 40s, and others that can still go at it like a jack rabbits in their 70s. But yes, to some, the physical side can be a very important part of a relationship or marriage. Sometimes if one partner loses interest in sex, it can place a strain on the marital relationship and end up with a partner having and affair, going with prostitutes in the case of men, or even in divorce.

Labia + Libido = Labido. Guys with a labido, lost or not, might be looking for something else entirely

[alanrchase]

All I want to know about is good sex. Been with wife a few years. Am I missing something?

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[Showbags]

All I want to know about is good sex. Been with wife a few years. Am I missing something?

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Well..if you are still wanting to know....

[HooHaa]

wow, yet again i have stumbled into the 1950's courtesy the Thai visa time warp application.

are women really such a mystery to you lot?

i personally have never run into a woman (thai or otherwise) who lacked sexual desire -- I may have met a few who lacked motivation or interest at the time, but i am certain they had their own wants and needs. just not for me,or not in that situation.

Edited March 18, 2014 by HooHaa

[bkkjames]

All I want to know about is good sex. Been with wife a few years. Am I missing something?

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well she is not...apparently.

[alanrchase]

Showbags. Touche.

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[bkkjames]

There was an old saying - there are those you want to marry and those you want to .....

Both can give you a 7 year itch.

[Kitsune]

It helps if she loves you.

[Jimi007]

when you are really "in love" there is no bad sex with your wife .

When you're married, there's hardly any sex at all.

I'm guessing you're talking from your own experience 52? Certainly not my experience, but to each his or her own… I'm a happy camper!

[smileydude]

One's definition of quality sex probably differs. To me its important that I'm able to give my partner the big "O" and if I give her several even better but this depends on the chemistry we have between each other more then either ones prowess. It doesn't have to be porn star gymnastic stuff but more importantly being able to please each other. I would feel very bummed out if she had to fake it but I bet a lot of women do because their partners are not paying enough attention to what she likes rather focusing on himself.

A lot of men have lost their libido's or have erectile dysfunction (ED's) because they've lost or never found that chemistry with their GF/wife.

[HerbalEd]

Many things make for a successful relationship, and while sex is not necessarily the most important one, it is still extremely important. If a woman has no sex drive at all, then she has a deeper problem that's causing her asexuality. For me passion in my lady is a must-have. And I'm not just talking "sexual" passion. I'm also talking about things like a passion for life, for food, for a hobby, for joy, etc.

I do think there is definitely hope for a woman who is non-sexual but is otherwise passionate. A well experienced and sexually skilled male partner can, with patience, help turn that woman on to her own sexuality ... and in time transform a prude into an eager and passionate sexual partner. As a man, this can be very fulfilling indeed.

[alanrchase]

Smileydude. You the man

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[HerbalEd]

My wife in the UK was rubbish at sex. I was with her 30 years.

Even easier in Thailand, wife no good in bed, hookers everywhere.

A wife is for making babies and bringing them up, not good sex.

Are you sure it was the wife that was rubbish at sex......

Ah the good old British house wife.....frumpy, boring, tired all the time......not willing to experiment.....lays on her back reading a book whilst the hubbie huffs and puffs.....what Thai woman would not find this desirable in a Farang 50 years later! Oooppss missed the part about the hookers..

I'm a marathon runner, sex doesn't involve any heavy breathing on my part.

Sounds like you've never run a marathon, because they actually do involve heavy breathing. Yeah, you need to pace yourself for the long haul, but you also have to run like mad towards the "finish" line. Otherwise, you're the boring one.

[FiftyTwo]

Sounds like you've never run a marathon, because they actually do involve heavy breathing. Yeah, you need to pace yourself for the long haul, but you also have to run like mad towards the "finish" line. Otherwise, you're the boring one.

If you can run for 4 hours ...... oh, what's the point!

[alanrchase]

All I want to know about is good sex. Been with wife a few years. Am I missing something?

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well she is not...apparently.

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[alanrchase]

Bkkjames, thank you for your contribution.

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[HerbalEd]

havent you ever heard of teaching them, if they dont know or have never been shown what do you expect. It is pretty easy to do, if you show her how to enjoy it herself and not just jump on and do the busines and jump off leaving her high and dry she will pick it up. Some women just lie there and this totally kills any passion(probably men that do the equivelent), if they get to enjoy it they will adjust they way they react, just try taking your time, talk to her about it and show here exactly how good it can be. When I was young it was just a matter of getting my rocks off but as you grow older and marry you learn that feelings play a big part and start to make sure your partner gets just as much enjoyment as you, maybe with a lot of happy endings she will really take to it.

This is my whole point….yes, I could teach her but if the sexual desire for any partner is completely absent on her part, what can teaching accomplish? I only ask this because I genuinely care about her and I need a partner who doesn't make me stray to the bar.

That's a big problem I have in Thailand. I don't put the effort into a relationship that I would back home because I know if she's not willing to put out, I can just buy great sex for 1000 baht.

In this case, she's beautiful and intelligent but she even admits she has a problem with no sex drive and always had the same problem in past relationships.

I don't know if I take time, can she change or is this something set from birth and no amount of time will fix the lack of desire. She said all the time she's alone, not once has she even contemplated touching herself which sort of tells me she just doesn't have the required libido for holding off the bar girls in a long term relationship.

Perhaps she has a sexual-physiology condition and the problem is a medical one. However, if she doesn't then you somehow need to figure out the password to her sexuality. It can be done, but many men don't know how or are too proud to try.

[bkkjames]

Bkkjames, thank you for your contribution.

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No worries mate - I am just glad someone understood what I wrote - cause I don't

[alanrchase]

Aussie? No problem.

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[Water Buffalo]

It helps if she loves you.

That is true!

[HerbalEd]

Let's be honest, it's gonna turn crap after a year or 2 anyway, so better to go with a girl that has money or a sister that gives out

Crap for you, ok ... but not for everyone. Results will vary.

Edited March 18, 2014 by HerbalEd

[bkkjames]

Let's be honest, it's gonna turn crap after a year or 2 anyway, so better to go with a girl that has money or a sister that gives out

Crap for you, ok ... but not for everyone. Results may vary.

yep, sometimes you have to use your imagination - this really depends if the lights are on or not.

[alanrchase]

Bkk. Jing jing.

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