Popular Post daveAustin Posted April 17, 2014 Popular Post Share Posted April 17, 2014 there are things you have to get strait right from the start of the relationship Yep. #1: no inlaws. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
recycler Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 I don't play cards! When I don't like something I say it. An easy way to prevent too many things you don't like is not to live with the (easily extending) Thai family. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarpolo Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 agree, in laws have not served me once Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Som wat Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 agree, in laws have not served me once They created your wife. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sdanielmcev Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 I don't play with a full deck anyways, so I don't know where the farang card is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tatsujin Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 If my "Thai relatives" called me "farang" I'd go nuts ... I have a name ... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tatsujin Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 Hold on - I thought all farang were down at heel sods discriminated against by all Thais who are working in unison to conspire against them and make like difficult..... samran - how well you know me lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stickylies Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 i play the farang card pretty often... and i always deliberately add "I am farang not thai"... there are plenty of customs (unwritten rules) here that are backward/retarded/outdated, period. living here for me means respecting people and the good things in thai society (plenty of that!)... it does NOT mean blindly accepting some of the crap that goes around here. the key is to be yourself, voice your opinion in a friendly/charming way and NOT causing loss of face to the other... 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
belg Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 if you marry into a family with no education, no standards, you might get stuff like that will they listen when you talk ? 555555555555555 mai cow jai pasa angrit 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ggt Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 I sometimes use the ladies toilet and say, "sorry, I can't read Thai" This begs the question...which toilet do ladyboys use??? They are not men...they are not women...is there a toilet for an it??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Som wat Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 If I get called farang I point out that I am not a farang, but Khymer. Pom mai pben khon farang, pom pben khon Khymer na khrap. This usually confuddles their two brain cells for a couple of days. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisinth Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 <script type='text/javascript'>window.mod_pagespeed_start = Number(new Date());</script> But Chris, outside the marriage, in a shop, you're getting poor service, the item you bought this morning has broken, they're stone walling you.Do you consider showing a bit of rage in the hope they'll think crazy Farang and give you your money back just to get you out of the shop? I've done it, it worked. I understand where you are coming from naboo. When I first came here, the first Thai words that I had instant recall with were the numbers 1 - 10. That was through constant repetition when things weren't going my way with purchases. Over time, I have become something of a creature of habit in that I generally use shops that I know provide good service or, ones that are easier to deal with if things go wrong. If the choice isn't there and the 'customer relationship' sends my pulse rate over 80, then I normally walk away; doesn't happen often but it does happen................... That said, I wouldn't feel right pulling the 'falang card' in times of chaos, to me it would be like lowering yourself to someone else's standards. Now if someone messed up my drink order................. I think I am becoming a bit of a wimp. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
connda Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 Pigeonjake, for starters, it would drive me nuts to hear my relatives-by-marriage say "falang dont like to see litter all over the garden" when they damn well know your name. The rest of the stuff wouldn't sit real well with me, either. You're right, you need to politely, but firmly set boundaries from the beginning of any relationship. Same in the west. Hubby didn't want me giving keys to our place to my parents when we lived in the same town. Fair enough -- they weren't paying the bills. I guarantee you when your relatives are talking to strangers about you, with you around, they call you falang. Why, do you have a name that's difficult to pronounce? Have they not yet come up with a suitable Thai nickname for you? Falang is hardly a suitable nickname. Did they do this while you were dating your tiirak? If so, this should have been a real clue to what was in store. It would have been like me going to visit my husband's three uncles and their families before our marriage and finding they all referred to me as "Girlee" in talking about me when I wasn't around. No need to take it like that. They use it cause it's easier to describe who they are talking about if they don't know you, not meant offensively. Calling you girlee would be offensive I think. As for Thai nicknames, I don't care really. Usually it's just Kris if they know me, falang if they don't. No big deal. Family members and friends close to the family call me by name or use "lueng" (uncle) which I consider respectful. When I do hear farang and start listening to conversations, it's generally between people who don't know me or villagers who have not met me. I take no offense. I know when I'm being talked about, and then I listen. It's entertaining. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
samran Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 If I get called farang I point out that I am not a farang, but Khymer. Pom mai pben khon farang, pom pben khon Khymer na khrap. This usually confuddles their two brain cells for a couple of days. Probably as they are trying to figure out if that is the same thing as 'khmen'. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bushwacker Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 It seems my most common expression these days is " I not Thai". So, I have taken from a card to an actual characteristic of my being. If the family has accepted a mix union (Thai + Westerner), then they need to bloody accept that I will do things differently and want things done differently. Early in my relationship, the MIL told the daughter that Falang do not like family visiting a lot and hanging around the house and do not like noise. She told her daughter that we white guys are quite private and demand a certain level of privacy. She had learned this from various observations and gossip in the village. So, when my wife told me, I just nodded, smiled and said that we falang are different. The MIL played the Falang Card for me .... THANKS! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CanThaiMike Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 I used to have the farang card stuck to my forehead. Now I have the 'You're all f'ing idiots.' card stuck on there. It's great. Love it good one! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DLP Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 If I get called farang I point out that I am not a farang, but Khymer. Pom mai pben khon farang, pom pben khon Khymer na khrap. This usually confuddles their two brain cells for a couple of days. Being called farang is better than being called an ATM. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robblok Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 Playing the farang card ? Its a mixed marriage both parties will have to accept that there are differences in culture. Its quite normal what you did and if someone does not like it too bad.. its a mixed marriage. They cant expect you to be and act like a Thai. Same as you cant expect your partner to act like someone from your country. But even among Thais or our kind things vary a lot culture wise so there is net set rule. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ayayay Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 naboo, the more you call yourself "farang", as in buying into the Thai notion of a stranger with white skin, and not really a real family member, the more you will find yourself isolated and always viewed as the "other". Stop referring to yourself as "farang", it will only hurt you in the long run. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
connda Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 I'll play the 'farang card' when stopped by the BIB. Flip my face mask up as I approach the roadblock. Oft-times they simply don't want to deal with a farang and let you pass unimpeded. But if I'm stopped I go into "English only mode" with a US North Carolina American drawl. Most of the time it works. I drove right thru a roadblock (very slowly) in Korat with both my wife and I without helmets. BIB didn't even look at me. Wife just said, "Drong bpai, keep going." We had a good laugh about that. (BTW, I almost always were a helmet). Sometmes it works, sometimes it doesn't. It usually depends on the English skill level of the officer. LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
connda Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 If I get called farang I point out that I am not a farang, but Khymer. Pom mai pben khon farang, pom pben khon Khymer na khrap. This usually confuddles their two brain cells for a couple of days. Probably as they are trying to figure out if that is the same thing as 'khmen'. Considering they call Cambodia "Cam-bo-ria", lord only knows how they pronounce Khymer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tim armstrong Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 I can now play the 'old person' card as I'm almost 65. I still grumble about the farlang word being used in conversations around me, but I've sort of got used to it. The old person card gets more respect and unexpected genuine kindness, as in an attractive business woman helping me to cross a busy road one day, when I didn't need help. But if a get a sense of 'stupid', or 'out to lunch' or a 'banga short of a bbq' - attached to the old person label, I may have to find a new card. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post JoeThePoster Posted April 17, 2014 Popular Post Share Posted April 17, 2014 The only farang cards I play are the ATM card and the credit card. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thaidel48 Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 I've been here for 26 years and am fluent in Thai and am familiar with Thai culture and customs and believe me I play the dumb/angry Falang more now than when I first got here especialy when it comes to mother-inlaws ect. lol 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
inthepink Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 (edited) If I get called farang I point out that I am not a farang, but Khymer. Pom mai pben khon farang, pom pben khon Khymer na khrap. This usually confuddles their two brain cells for a couple of days. Probably as they are trying to figure out if that is the same thing as 'khmen'. Considering they call Cambodia "Cam-bo-ria", lord only knows how they pronounce Khymer. They call Cambodia, Gamphuchaa (which is a lot closer to the Khmer word for their own country than Cambodia is). I've used the angry Westerner card in shops to get what I want but chrisinth's post gave me pause for thought. It's probably time I stopped doing it. Edited April 17, 2014 by inthepink Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Colabamumbai Posted April 17, 2014 Popular Post Share Posted April 17, 2014 (edited) When someones son takes my motorbike instead of his mothers or g/fs or mother car without asking andI get told that if I want to support a Thai family that this is the way I tell them bullshit. I tell them If a Thai wanted to borrow his brothers motorcycle or mothers or whoever"s that he would ask for permission. They are so cheap, and then I have to put 100 Baht in the tank when it comes back. When I ask can I take your car or bike without asking you they tell me no. This is why I live alone more than not. Edited April 17, 2014 by Colabamumbai 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
socksy01 Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 I thought the ferrang card had another name. Credit card. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
naboo Posted April 17, 2014 Author Share Posted April 17, 2014 I've used the angry Westerner card in shops to get what I want but chrisinth's post gave me pause for thought. It's probably time I stopped doing it. It does make returning to the shop a bit difficult. I'm glad there are two Home Pros in Chiang Mai. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Benmart Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 Deliberately playing the farang card is giving all farang a bad name. Thanks guys. Good to see how proud and honourable you are, taking advantage of people, from laziness or slyness, or just a conscious lack of respect. I've found that what others have done I can usually undo by my actions. I don't credit others for their bad behaviors as I have no control of their past actions. Where there is laziness, I try to be industrious. Where there is slyness, I try to forthright. Where there is disrespect, I try to be courteous and respectful. I've found that my positive behaviors and good intentions usually produce like in return. So far so good. One day at a time. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gandtee Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 I sometimes use the ladies toilet and say, "sorry, I can't read Thai" Yeah. I've heard about you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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