Do you like being the only farang in your area?

[Sena Dave]

I wouldn't class someone as a "Friend" just because they spoke English and I had no one else to talk to

[hotsoup]

I like and dislike it. I like it because people are very friendly to my face. I donot like it because behind my back they make up stories about the farang and gossip a lot.

Obvious answer is to 'square' the wife and give them some substance to gossip about? I have found that visits to 'Heaven' Open 24 hours 120B an hour 320 Baht a night to watch TV and drink beer with a charming companion sets the town alight to the amusement of 'her upstairs'

And such a place exists somewhere in the Thai-Boonies? If yes, I would consider relocating.

Cheers.

Indeed it does; and not only one. It is a hazard of travelling around remote Issan and trying to find a 'Resort' to stay in that is not a 'Heaven'. You see a sign to what looks like a beautiful rural hideaway only to find two rows of bungalows with a lot of curtains! In Uttardit, now known in the family, as UttaraToot, it proved impossible to find lodging where a 10 year old could stay..had to move on!

[96tehtarp]

Being isolated in those villages living among people who have absolutely nothing in common with yourself is a very strange choice of life for a Westerner. The complete inability to have any intellectual conversation must be torture after a while. Most of the guys i,ve met on my rare excursions tend to be pretty miserable souls but of course they won't admit it. Many lured by young wives and conned into building a house for the whole family to treat as their own ( well it's not yours anyhow ). Some live with the inlaws but all are doing something they'd never even consider back home so why now. There mere sight of a new farang in the village lights up their eyes with excitement but it's only for a few days until they're gone and it's back to the normal drudgery of life. Personally i think you must be a little crazy or just complete mugs. Yes , i know you're all going to tell me how different it is for you and how wrong i am but i still don't believe you.

In this post I am going to refute and disagree with every point you make in your post.

"Being isolated in those villages living among people who have absolutely nothing in common with yourself is a very strange choice of life for a Westerner."

Isolation is a very common choice for Westerners. We have a long history of seeking isolation: missionaries, settlers, and colonialists are some of the best examples. Life becomes richer and more cherished as one travels and experiences the things in common that all people enjoy. Many people back home who can afford it have isolated cabins or cottages and their time spent there is considered to be "quality time".

"The complete inability to have any intellectual conversation must be torture after a while."

There is no shortage of intellectual conversation if one seeks it, both by learning to speak the local dialect and using the internet. Before the internet and telephone service existed there was shortwave radio. I have many fond memories of DXing from my radio shack using a long wire antenna.

"Most of the guys i,ve met on my rare excursions tend to be pretty miserable souls but of course they won't admit it."

I live in the sticks and most of the guys I meet are not in anyway miserable, not by a long-shot. The miserable mugs are the minority, and they don't last very long and soon move on, as you have. They are also extremely vocal about it, if they are miserable.

"Many lured by young wives and conned into building a house for the whole family to treat as their own ( well it's not yours anyhow )."

Most choose younger wives because frankly, they'd rather not marry an old maid. Most, myself included control the land by either usufruct and or 30 year lease and own their houses which sit on the land outright and have their wives will everything to them if predeceased. Most have total control over those who live in their homes.

"Some live with the inlaws but all are doing something they'd never even consider back home...."

Those who choose to live with their in-laws do this because it is possible here and quite common. They would never have considered doing so at home because it is hardly ever possible in modern consumer society where family values have been replaced by the modernity of the nanny-state.

"There mere sight of a new farang in the village lights up their eyes with excitement but it's only for a few days until they're gone and it's back to the normal drudgery of life."

Drudgery of life is often called working for a living. I have never seen more drudgery than I have in the West at rush-hour during the commute of the 9-5-ers to and from their jobs.

"Personally i think you must be a little crazy or just complete mugs."

Personally I think you are expressing your perspective from within the context of your limited experience. I do not understand your reference to "mugs" in this context as my extensive experience with "mugs" has been mostly in Thailand's tourist meccas.

"Yes , i know you're all going to tell me how different it is for you and how wrong i am but i still don't believe you."

I don't think everyone will tell you how different it is for them because you are entitled to your opinion. Most who would tell you how different it is for them can't be bothered to take the time to tell you because they are too busy enjoying themselves living the life the way they choose, and don't care one iota if you believe them or not.

Edited August 26, 2014 by 96tehtarp

[CTO]

Love it, yes I'll say hello back to other Farangs, but I often decline to sit down and drink till I can't walk just because they are Farangs, I prefer to get drunk with the locals mostly,

[nanapong]

Being isolated in those villages living among people who have absolutely nothing in common with yourself is a very strange choice of life for a Westerner. The complete inability to have any intellectual conversation must be torture after a while. Most of the guys i,ve met on my rare excursions tend to be pretty miserable souls but of course they won't admit it. Many lured by young wives and conned into building a house for the whole family to treat as their own ( well it's not yours anyhow ). Some live with the inlaws but all are doing something they'd never even consider back home so why now. There mere sight of a new farang in the village lights up their eyes with excitement but it's only for a few days until they're gone and it's back to the normal drudgery of life. Personally i think you must be a little crazy or just complete mugs. Yes , i know you're all going to tell me how different it is for you and how wrong i am but i still don't believe you.

Sorry that things didn't work out for you, but you really have to let your bitter feelings go. You'll be much happier for it.

How do you mean things didn't work out for me. I wouldn't live in any of those villages for anything so there's no bitter feelings whatsoever. My comment is just an observation of what i saw and that was many sad farangs wishing they had their chance again. It's much better to just use the women for sex and not be fooled into thinking they actually love you and not your money. Unfortunately many farangs are very guillable and only realize what a plonker they've been when it's too late.

[ResandePohm]

It is easy to feel like you are the only farang in town when there are many. I find it weird that Westerners that I incur on exercise walks, at the supermarket and just most anywhere are totally unfriendly -- act as if you are invisible.. I've heard the stories about some other farangs glomming on to you - but the degree of self-protection is IMO way over the top... Not even a nod of the head to a good morning, or just a plain offending stare is sometimes all that one gets back from maybe just saying 'good morning' all done without sticking out one's hand expecting a handshake ... sad really...

I consider these farangs as defective - shunted - stunted personality defect... If one cannot every nod the head to another Westerner in an Asian country -- then that person has a great personal problem IMO an exaggerated fear expectation ... sick actually

What a load of BS.Would you in your own country go up to a complete stranger in Tesco and try and befriend them?. If you did do you think they would appreciate it? I some how doubt it. They would probably take you for being a weirdo. So if you would not do that at home why do it here? Or maybe you are a weirdo.

[96tehtarp]

It is easy to feel like you are the only farang in town when there are many. I find it weird that Westerners that I incur on exercise walks, at the supermarket and just most anywhere are totally unfriendly -- act as if you are invisible.. I've heard the stories about some other farangs glomming on to you - but the degree of self-protection is IMO way over the top... Not even a nod of the head to a good morning, or just a plain offending stare is sometimes all that one gets back from maybe just saying 'good morning' all done without sticking out one's hand expecting a handshake ... sad really...

I consider these farangs as defective - shunted - stunted personality defect... If one cannot every nod the head to another Westerner in an Asian country -- then that person has a great personal problem IMO an exaggerated fear expectation ... sick actually

What a load of BS.Would you in your own country go up to a complete stranger in Tesco and try and befriend them?. If you did do you think they would appreciate it? I some how doubt it. They would probably take you for being a weirdo. So if you would not do that at home why do it here?

I don't know whether it is weird or not, however the most commonly practiced acknowledgment among fellow farangs in areas where foreigners are a rare sight is to smile, give a polite nod of the head and a quick hello and nothing more. This is what I experience most of the time. This also minimizes the risk of being glommed by a nutcase sex-tourist on a weekend adventure to rural Thailand.

[Muhendis]

Do you like being the only farang in your area?

NO

... I LOVE it

Yep! Me too......

But why? I think its because my ego is stroked by being made to feel "special".

[Mosha]

I live about as remotely as it is possible to live in Thailand on a small farm near a very small village surrounded by rice and rubber trees.The "roads" are uneven potholes filled with yellow mud in the wet season and turn to dry dustbowls for the rest of the year. The native fauna and flora is spectacular, unique and mesmerising. The people are friendly but wary. The kids are delightful. I dodge chickens, dogs, cows water buffalo and drunk motor cyclists every day on my treks through the countryside.

My nearest town is Sawan Daeng Din a mere 28 kilometres or 45 minute drive away (about 100 km south of Udon Thani).

I see the ocassional european at the day markets, but they tend to be as happy in their "isolation" as am I.

Despite this distance from so called civilization, I feel removed from the troubles of the world, closer to the things that really matter-the sun and the sky and the weather and the seasons and real, joyful emotional relationship with family. I am a walking cliche who seemed to have stepped out of 1960's pop music extolling the joys of earth and air and water, independence and freedom.

And I have never been happier.

The last line says all we need to know.

[seajae]

Pardon my ignorance !!

But what is a Badger Milker and TGAU ???

I'm new to Thai Visa and enjoy the humor and diversity of opinion.

sorry mate but if we tell you we will have to shoot you........ but it does involve the Welsh which should explain a lot

Edited August 26, 2014 by seajae

[dotpoom]

I am the only Farang in my moban which is a sort of middle class one, consisting mainly of retired officers from the services. My neighbors don't talk to me or my wife. I think it's because I'm a Farang and my wife thinks it's because she has very brown skin and is from Isarn.

Could be that both of us are being discriminated against or maybe the neighbors just like to keep themselves to themselves....who cares. Nothing in life is ever permanent. I moved here because I wanted peace and quite.....and I certainly got that....555.

[David48]

Being isolated in those villages living among people who have absolutely nothing in common with yourself is a very strange choice of life for a Westerner. The complete inability to have any intellectual conversation must be torture after a while.

"The complete inability to have any intellectual conversation must be torture after a while."

I know that this be will controversial ... if I want Intellectual conversation I simply chat with my Partner.

.

.

[GuestHouse]

The problem with being the only Farang in an area is the discovery that you are not.

That in and of itself is not problematic - the real problem is avoiding the other Farang(s).

[Sena Dave]

Unfortunately if its ex armed forces officers its more than likely your wife , not being in their "Class' than you.

Nothing against your wife mate , but they treat their own like shit , if they don't think they are form there own "Class"

[Somsrisonphimai]

Who does not like being treated like a supper star?

[siampolee]

ResandePhom post # 66

What a load of BS.Would you in your own country go up to a complete stranger in Tesco and try and befriend them?. If you did do you think they would appreciate it? I some how doubt it. They would probably take you for being a weirdo. So if you would not do that at home why do it here? Or maybe you are a weirdo.

When I am at our Surin farm house with the family I am the only resident farang for about 16 kilometers and when I have met the other somewhat rare foreigners in the area they've all spoken and they are from a variety of nationalities.

We've exchanged books and videos etc. and socialized that's not weird at all even met foreigners in the local Tesco Lotus Express and 7-11 outlets which are some 15 kilometers from home.

Strangely enough none of us ever considered the other parties weird.

Have you ever lived in a community where you are the only one of your foreigner for any length of time?

I have as have many others too and social contacts whilst rare are welcome..

Perhaps weirdness factor is with your attitude ResandePhom.

[willyumiii]

I like it.

I am not prejudged and lumped in with all of the fat, sloppy, rude, drunk sex fiends that so many in high farang population areas assume farangs are.

The people of my town have never been exposed to irresponsible foreign element that has invaded Bangkok, Pattaya and all the high farang population areas yet.

Here, if the locals do not like me, it is a result of something I have done or not done, not what some disrespectful drunk has done.

So far, it seems I am doing o.k. and making a pretty good impression.

Most even call me by name...not "Farang"!

[ResandePohm]

It is easy to feel like you are the only farang in town when there are many. I find it weird that Westerners that I incur on exercise walks, at the supermarket and just most anywhere are totally unfriendly -- act as if you are invisible.. I've heard the stories about some other farangs glomming on to you - but the degree of self-protection is IMO way over the top... Not even a nod of the head to a good morning, or just a plain offending stare is sometimes all that one gets back from maybe just saying 'good morning' all done without sticking out one's hand expecting a handshake ... sad really...

I consider these farangs as defective - shunted - stunted personality defect... If one cannot every nod the head to another Westerner in an Asian country -- then that person has a great personal problem IMO an exaggerated fear expectation ... sick actually

What a load of BS.Would you in your own country go up to a complete stranger in Tesco and try and befriend them?. If you did do you think they would appreciate it? I some how doubt it. They would probably take you for being a weirdo. So if you would not do that at home why do it here?

I don't know whether it is weird or not, however the most commonly practiced acknowledgment among fellow farangs in areas where foreigners are a rare sight is to smile, give a polite nod of the head and a quick hello and nothing more. This is what I experience most of the time. This also minimizes the risk of being glommed by a nutcase sex-tourist on a weekend adventure to rural Thailand.

I can understand where you are coming from. You are obviously a very courteous gentleman. However I feel no need to acknowledge someone just because they are farang. It would be like acknowledging people with red hair back home just because I too have red hair. Should I meet a farang socially or through business of course I acknowledge them as I would anyone else that I knew. But a complete stranger who I more than likely have nothing in common with...No.

[thaibeachlovers]

Being isolated in those villages living among people who have absolutely nothing in common with yourself is a very strange choice of life for a Westerner. The complete inability to have any intellectual conversation must be torture after a while. Most of the guys i,ve met on my rare excursions tend to be pretty miserable souls but of course they won't admit it. Many lured by young wives and conned into building a house for the whole family to treat as their own ( well it's not yours anyhow ). Some live with the inlaws but all are doing something they'd never even consider back home so why now. There mere sight of a new farang in the village lights up their eyes with excitement but it's only for a few days until they're gone and it's back to the normal drudgery of life. Personally i think you must be a little crazy or just complete mugs. Yes , i know you're all going to tell me how different it is for you and how wrong i am but i still don't believe you.

I share your feelings about village life, where I was the only farang. So, eventually I was able to insist on leaving, ending up in a small town, where I have seen just 1 other farang about. I don't miss the "intellectual" conversation much, though TV does provide some mental stimulation.

I'm happy just pottering about the house, with an occasional excursion to Chiang Mai, or a trip further afield when my wife's work roster allows. I don't think I'd survive without cable tv and the internet though. The village was doing hard time.

3 pages and not even a day, wow. I'm impressed. Thanks guys.

[NoshowJones]

I have spent 2 years in Thailand being the only farang in the small village.... it is nice mostly, but very lonely at times, even though I am married to a wonderful Thai woman, I am still the odd one out and am often left out of many things because (mostly) I don't drink or gamble or screw around, so I have absolutely nothing in common with Thai men and Thai women don't seem to want a man hanging around while they natter on...! My wife does attend to me regularly, but occasionally her family take precedence over me... and that's fine... I just have very few people who I can sit and have a good old D&M conversation with...!

I am the only Farang in my village, all my Farang friends live in surrounding villages, and we all meet up, or sometimes go away for the weekend. Until about a year ago, there was another Farang who was a drunk and could not keep any friends, now he is dead and missed by no one.

I am happy the way things are, although it would be nice to have another Farang come to live in my village who I could enjoy a conversation with without any drunkeness involved.

[thejcb]

OP, I love being the only farang in the village.

Feel like a novelty here, wais all over, smiles from everybody.

My only problem is, can't approach the sexy girls, as everybody knows the farang and will immediately go to my wife.

But I'm working on that.......there are other villages around.........

You stupid sod, so much stupidity in this one missive. Ridiculous words.

[NoshowJones]

I wouldn't class someone as a "Friend" just because they spoke English and I had no one else to talk to

Before I would class anyone as a friend, I would have to see their drinking habits, I just hate drunks, and have no patience with them.

[NoshowJones]

Love it, yes I'll say hello back to other Farangs, but I often decline to sit down and drink till I can't walk just because they are Farangs, I prefer to get drunk with the locals mostly,

Are you not ashamed of being a drunk?

[96tehtarp]

What a load of BS.Would you in your own country go up to a complete stranger in Tesco and try and befriend them?. If you did do you think they would appreciate it? I some how doubt it. They would probably take you for being a weirdo. So if you would not do that at home why do it here?

I don't know whether it is weird or not, however the most commonly practiced acknowledgment among fellow farangs in areas where foreigners are a rare sight is to smile, give a polite nod of the head and a quick hello and nothing more. This is what I experience most of the time. This also minimizes the risk of being glommed by a nutcase sex-tourist on a weekend adventure to rural Thailand.

I can understand where you are coming from. You are obviously a very courteous gentleman. However I feel no need to acknowledge someone just because they are farang. It would be like acknowledging people with red hair back home just because I too have red hair. Should I meet a farang socially or through business of course I acknowledge them as I would anyone else that I knew. But a complete stranger who I more than likely have nothing in common with...No.

Life in the small towns is low stress and easy going. People say hello to each other all of the time without needing a specific reason and stop to chat about anything from today's weather or where you come from. Here, people don't normally need to have something in common in order to say hello.

I don't give the "acknowledgment" treatment to other farangs where there are many and farang sightings happen on a near daily basis. However it's a fairly common practice in parts where a person could go for months without a farang "sighting". Actually, it's usually the other guy who beats me to it and it is a good way to meet other people with a common ancestry, language, and culture. You are quite right that there is no need to feel that any courtesy is required, however the benefits outweigh the negatives in my experience.

[davidmann]

I like and dislike it. I like it because people are very friendly to my face. I donot like it because behind my back they make up stories about the farang and gossip a lot.

Totally true ,made my life impossible ,

[96tehtarp]

OP, I love being the only farang in the village.

Feel like a novelty here, wais all over, smiles from everybody.

My only problem is, can't approach the sexy girls, as everybody knows the farang and will immediately go to my wife.

But I'm working on that.......there are other villages around.........

You stupid sod, so much stupidity in this one missive. Ridiculous words.

I think Costas was merely taking a poke, and being facetious.

[NoshowJones]

It is easy to feel like you are the only farang in town when there are many. I find it weird that Westerners that I incur on exercise walks, at the supermarket and just most anywhere are totally unfriendly -- act as if you are invisible.. I've heard the stories about some other farangs glomming on to you - but the degree of self-protection is IMO way over the top... Not even a nod of the head to a good morning, or just a plain offending stare is sometimes all that one gets back from maybe just saying 'good morning' all done without sticking out one's hand expecting a handshake ... sad really...

I consider these farangs as defective - shunted - stunted personality defect... If one cannot every nod the head to another Westerner in an Asian country -- then that person has a great personal problem IMO an exaggerated fear expectation ... sick actually

What a load of BS.Would you in your own country go up to a complete stranger in Tesco and try and befriend them?. If you did do you think they would appreciate it? I some how doubt it. They would probably take you for being a weirdo. So if you would not do that at home why do it here? Or maybe you are a weirdo.

I think that is unfair, I am not a weirdo, If I saw a another Farang in my village, I not go up to him and try and befriend him, I would nod and be prepared to move on, leaving him the chance to nod back and start a conversation. No. I would not do that in my own country as I see farangs all the time, well in the UK maybe not all the time due to the amount of immigrants.

Surely it is easy to see the difference between being here in Thailand among locals and being in your own country among other Farangs.

[96tehtarp]

I like and dislike it. I like it because people are very friendly to my face. I donot like it because behind my back they make up stories about the farang and gossip a lot.

Totally true ,made my life impossible ,

This is one of the negatives of living in the small town.

There is a certain class of people here who have nothing better to do than sit idly around and talk about every intimate detail of other people's business and pass judgement. If one can't handle this it can make life impossible.

The rich well educated Chinese families keep gossip strictly within the immediate family circle and it's more likely to be business intelligence than idle gossip.

[otherstuff1957]

A few years ago I was driving through some hills with some of my wife's relatives. We passed a nice looking house and one of the women told me about the New Zealander who was living there, his wife, how much the house cost, how often they stayed there, whether his wife was faithful or not (based on gossip, it seems as if about 1/2 of the Thai village wives are not faithful to their husbands).. etc... This house was about 10 or 15 km away from hers and she knew all about him.

Personally, I prefer the relative anonymity of the big city.

[Suradit69]

I like and dislike it. I like it because people are very friendly to my face. I donot like it because behind my back they make up stories about the farang and gossip a lot.

"make up" ??