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Refused to pay for Thai gf's flight to Europe and now she's mad. Am I being unreasonable?


fitfalang

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My girlfriend has been planning a trip to Europe with me for a while. She was under some impression that I was going to pay for her flight for some reason, to which I told her that she can pay it herself. Now she is mad and telling me she's not coming then.

I am by no means wealthy, just a student living on a student loan. She has a good office job by Thai standards and earns roughly the same amount as me (loan vs her salary). We are around the same age, she is a little older than me.

It's not only the fact that I'm actually not able to pay for her flight, but the principle that I don't want a girlfriend that needs my financial support. I'm pretty strict with this as reading TV for years has taught me to always be careful with Thai girls who ask for your money.

Normally we split everything 50/50 though, she is normally not of the type who expects for the man to pay for everything.

What do you think? Am I being unreasonable?

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mrtoad, on 06 Jan 2015 - 13:09, said:

Welcome to the real world.

Take her for a slap up 99 baht breakfast and tell her she can keep the change of a hundred.

I think it'll more like a cold can of baked beans in his bedsit.

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best response in these cases speaking from experience is to politely decline the offer unless the inviter offers to pay or makes it clear the trip is free.

advice goes for other things as well like fancy dinners, throwing parties and such.

Edited by fey
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Not sure here.. i mean i also have shared cost with the gf. However a trip to Europe would be fun for you and if she is doing it just for you then why should she pay. You want her to visit Europe and such. I know that I always pay for tickets, its not her fault my family lives in Europe.

No it was actually her suggestion - she wants to come because she's always wanted to see Europe.

I wouldn't personally mind just coming to Thailand instead for the holidays, but of course a trip to Europe with her would be fun.

She is using her friends as comparisons, who have +10 year old farang boyfriends with big incomes who of course pay for their trips. However I'm still a student and living on a similar budget as herself, but in a country where most things are twice as expensive as in Thailand. And someone said about not getting paid for holidays.. it will be paid annual leave combined with public holidays for her so she is indeed getting paid.

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How much are we talking about here ? . . . . . . than a thousand dollars ?

Borrow it from her.

If she behaves herself on the trip pay her back in dribs and drabs.

Pants.

Well said Donny.

Those courses you've been doing are really helping you !

I'd say the GF isn't feeling the love ATM.

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Oh come on guys, who pays is realistically going to be what kind of a budget someone is on. Everybody here isn't a old codger living with a guaranteed pension every month, a student living on a loan isn't going to be able to pay for everything. The girl has a job, so she can pay also. Who said the trip was for him, are you really going to imply that she wouldn't enjoy a trip to Europe? You gotta be kidding me. My vote says she pays her own way in this situation .

I wouldnt pay hard earned money to visit europe, especially if I was making a thai wage.

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OP, stop being a cheap Charlie and pay the girls ticket.

Not only that but upgrade it to 1st class.........you can travel on economy.

Show her, what a loving husband you will become in the future.

As we all know, money is no object for us rich farangs.

then you pay it, he already told you he aint rich

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OP-

Don't be so hard on yourself and for <deleted>'s sake man up and don't be such a sucker. She's your girlfriend not your wife or your family, she's got no claim to your cash. The facts are that you've got no leverage on her and frankly Thai women have a nasty habit of being theives and con artists. If you want to be a nice guy, you could offer to pay for 100% the meals and drinks in Europe (a significant expense). If she wont accept the terms, get a new girlfriend and count your blessing all the way to the bank.

Please dont be naive and think "she's different", please be careful and keep your money close.

gb33

Yeah thanks this is what I was thinking.

That's why I've been always careful with Thai girls and usually refuse to pay for for their shit - this is a good way to see what is their motivation to be with you in the first place. Works every time! The thing is I have only known this girl for a few months which is why im just being careful.

I don't want to invest any money on her before I can 100% trust her.

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