Wife changed when she got back to the village

[PeCeDe]

God what a terrible situation, take your kid, and head home... Whatever happened between your wife and you cannot be reversed. Look after that kid, it belongs to you, and that includes life insurance.

[geisha]

Age difference, culture clash, never the twine shall meet, forget the bike and coffee shop story . Do not go back to the village. If I understand rightly, you only have 2 weeks left in Thailand. If the child can leave with you, then I would leave, and settle it all out nicely later with lawyers. If not, you have to take the boy back to his mother, and then leave immediately for Britain and sort it out from there.you have no other options.

[enufsaid]

James436, silly silly man. Run forest run

[torpedo1970]

Surprised it took her so long to show the true self....

Could have something to do with you not building the house for her parents yet....

I join the others here, sell the bike, get on that plane home... death treats in Thailand are a lot more serious than at home... life is so much cheaper here....

if you have your sons passport, bring him with you, if not make arrangement for him to be picked up in a neutral public place far away from that village, never go there again...

be paranoid, there is nothing like a woman scorned, a Thai woman angry is ten times worse. you can be hunted down and killed for less than 50K Baht in this country... if you somehow have made any of her family loose face at any time, they would even do it for free.... (just cover the petrol)

Take care, be paranoid, and good luck.....

[Wat dee]

Try Chang Draught........

And coke for he kid...

[farang000999]

65 year old raising a 3 year old as a single father.

that will work out well.

[Lokie]

As been said, take your lad back to his mum and do not stay in the village for any period, get what ever stuff she lays out for you and go back to Udon, if time left in Thailand rent a room for now and then weigh up options (the relationship is over) If no time left in LOS go home. ( similar happened to my older brother same age as you and basically same M O, built house etc in village, younger Mrs, had a sprog, Mother in law moved in with Lazy ar$ed no good younger Brother in law and Granny, 3 months later - Finished. Kid is okay , my brother visits every few months just an hour or two with his lad, he lives 100K away and re-married again - he's daft as a brush?? Anyway Good luck mate...

Edited March 29, 2015 by Lokie

[rixalex]

I would get out of Thailand as fast as you can....break your Honda Steed down and send it back to the UK where you can ride it all day long,

Break it down and send it back to the UK?! It's a Honda Steed for goodness sake, not a Goldwing (not that I would bother breaking down and sending one of those anywhere either).

Just sell it. If time is short take it to somewhere like Siam Motors who may be willing to sell it on your behalf for a commission. Either that or take it to one of the bike shops and strike a deal for cash. The main thing at this stage is just getting it off your hands.

[Wat dee]

you dont understand her mentality? to be honest i dont understand your mentality allowing her so much control and allowing her to abuse that control to the detriment of your relationship with her, your marriage, your son and your own life and finances. but that's in the past.

the marriage is finished and you would be a fool to invest any more money in it even if you feel up to investing more emotion in it.

if your son has british citizenship and you feel you can take care of him in the UK then take him there.

if he has thai citizenship then he'll be staying here. and you have to decide if you are staying or not.

Does not matter if he thinks he can take care of his son, he brought the boy into the world and now MUST raise him alone, away from the rape and torture and ultimate sex slave trade she will sell him too

What is wrong with you people who advise him otherwise

If the kid has a passport from UK, leave today

Immigration has no authority to stop him, yet

I dont think this is true.He would need the mother's consent.

NO!! Kid can travel freely if He has a passport.

[rixalex]

As been said, take your lad back to his mum and do not stay in the village for any period, get what ever stuff she lays out for you and go back to Udon, if time left in Thailand rent a room for now and then weigh up options (the relationship is over) If no time left in LOS go home. ( similar happened to my older brother same age as you and basically same M O, built house etc in village, younger Mrs, had a sprog, Mother in law moved in with Lazy ar$ed no good younger Brother in law and Granny, 3 months later - Finished. Kid is okay , my brother visits every few months just an hour or two with his lad, he lives 100K away and re-married again - he's daft as a brush?? Anyway Good luck mate...

What is with these guys? You can kind of forgive misjudging a person's character after a short period of courting, but how can you, as many of these guys do, go through a long period of courting, then get engaged, then get married, then settle down together, then have baby number one, then baby number two...and then, all of a sudden realise the wife is a monster. Is it really possible that the woman has suddenly changed from good to bad, or do these guys have simply no idea what a good person and what an evil selfish bitch looks like? Makes you wonder. Can only assume their 'other brain' has been put in charge.

[MaeJoMTB]

As been said, take your lad back to his mum and do not stay in the village for any period, get what ever stuff she lays out for you and go back to Udon, if time left in Thailand rent a room for now and then weigh up options (the relationship is over) If no time left in LOS go home. ( similar happened to my older brother same age as you and basically same M O, built house etc in village, younger Mrs, had a sprog, Mother in law moved in with Lazy ar$ed no good younger Brother in law and Granny, 3 months later - Finished. Kid is okay , my brother visits every few months just an hour or two with his lad, he lives 100K away and re-married again - he's daft as a brush?? Anyway Good luck mate...

What is with these guys? You can kind of forgive misjudging a person's character after a short period of courting, but how can you, as many of these guys do, go through a long period of courting, then get engaged, then get married, then settle down together, then have baby number one, then baby number two...and then, all of a sudden realise the wife is a monster. Is it really possible that the woman has suddenly changed from good to bad, or do these guys have simply no idea what a good person and what an evil selfish bitch looks like? Makes you wonder. Can only assume their 'other brain' has been put in charge.

I often ask myself that,

Did it in the UK, courting 2 years, married 5 years, 4 children over the next 20 years ...... then she turned into a monster.

Can't blame my other brain as it only got an outing once a month (if that).

Happens all the time.

But I have no answer to the problem.

Edited March 29, 2015 by MaeJoMTB

[catman20]

here we go again another silly old farang who thought his Thai lady loved him got married to her 65 and a kid of 3 years old words fail me. what part don't you get, its a com wake up and smell the coffee and that goes for the rest of you out there that are thinking about marring your Thai lady and having a kids.

Edited March 29, 2015 by catman20

[NoshowJones]

Thailand is full of sixty odd year old Farangs, who are walking ATMs, pick up women young enough to be their daughters or grand daughters. and end up with little kids.

Initially, they come out here to retire, some having raised a family back in their homeland, end up with kids, then that's their retirement up in the air. I have no sympathy with

any of them. They have made their bed so they can lie on it.

[catman20]

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65 year old raising a 3 year old as a single father.

that will work out well.

lucky man

[catman20]

<script type='text/javascript'>window.mod_pagespeed_start = Number(new Date());</script>

Thailand is full of sixty odd year old Farangs, who are walking ATMs, pick up women young enough to be their daughters or grand daughters. and end up with little kids.

Initially, they come out here to retire, some having raised a family back in their homeland, end up with kids, then that's their retirement up in the air. I have no sympathy with

any of them. They have made their bed so they can lie on it.

luv it mate, spoken by a real man !!!!!!!!!!!

[Rickster]

I the wise words ofJeremy Kyle.....you should know better at your age and why didn't you put something on the end of it!!!

Edited March 29, 2015 by Rickster

[dutchisaan]

OP,..... Op, ..... Where are you? 9 pages on your post and no reaction? Did she realy kill you, or is this a troll post?

Edited March 29, 2015 by dutchisaan

[Watertoy]

It takes 5 years to really know someone. If she was a Bargirl, Internet Bride, Golf Caddy or some other Cunning, Controlling and Manipulative Slut (with a past ) when you met her, then none of their actions, non-emotions or behaviours will make sense to you, her or anyone else. My Aunty always told me to tell the girls - if its not on - then its not on.......Condoms, that is. LOS...Land of Smiles and what exactly is behind the smiles ? Land of Sluts...and Ladyboys.

[sir charles IV]

You seem an average man living an average life. Which is fine. Then u met a girl who made u feel like a young man again. Probably parading her to everyone with a grin on your face (I still got it, u said). That's fine too. But wait. The price u had to pay was to keep her interested (money, kid, etc). She feels that you cannot do that anymore so it is time for u to go back to your old self. An average man living an average life and find someone more suited to you. I guess a 60 year old Englishwoman. No eating bugs, and u can have a meaningful relationship with her. Get it? You've had your thing with a young woman and it's time to return to normality. You'll be fine mate. Give it a couple months and it'll be ok.

[willyumiii]

" Wife changed when she got back to the village"

I'll bet she had to change a lot for you when she went to your country as well!

Maybe it should be your turn to change for her now?

"She flew into a rage and said I did never want to be here and I don’t like the family and the rest."

It sounds like the wife is right,

Some westerners do not have the respect or understand of Thai culture and family structure needed to survive in rural Thailand.

It sounds like you are one of them.

If you know anything, you know your wife's family is more important to her than anything..not you, her family!

You were given a chance to be part of that family and have rejected them.

Either make an honest effort yo adjust ( sounds like you have not tried at all ) or move on..alone.

​It would be very wrong and bad for your child to be separated from his mother.

Like me, you are an old man.

How well do you think you can raise a young child and how many more years do you think you will be around to raise him?

I am in what could be a similar situation.

My Thai wife lived with me in the US for 6 years before we and our 3 year old child relocated to her village in rural Thailand.

It has been very difficult for me, but because I love my wife and child and have learned to love her family and their culture I have made countless concessionsin order to make it work.

If you truly love your family, you can make it work also.

If you only truly love yourself..take your self and your wonderful Honda somewhere else.

Footnote: It seems you are more concerned about your prize Honda than your family..why did you get married and father a child?

Good luck with that bike of yours!

[sir charles IV]

" Wife changed when she got back to the village"

I'll bet she had to change a lot for you when she went to your country as well!

Maybe it should be your turn to change for her now?

"She flew into a rage and said I did never want to be here and I don’t like the family and the rest."

It sounds like the wife is right,

Some westerners do not have the respect or understand of Thai culture and family structure needed to survive in rural Thailand.

It sounds like you are one of them.

If you know anything, you know your wife's family is more important to her than anything..not you, her family!

You were given a chance to be part of that family and have rejected them.

Either make an honest effort yo adjust ( sounds like you have not tried at all ) or move on..alone.

​It would be very wrong and bad for your child to be separated from his mother.

Like me, you are an old man.

How well do you think you can raise a young child and how many more years do you think you will be around to raise him?

I am in what could be a similar situation.

My Thai wife lived with me in the US for 6 years before we and our 3 year old child relocated to her village in rural Thailand.

It has been very difficult for me, but because I love my wife and child and have learned to love her family and their culture I have made countless concessionsin order to make it work.

If you truly love your family, you can make it work also.

If you only truly love yourself..take your self and your wonderful Honda somewhere else.

Footnote: It seems you are more concerned about your prize Honda than your family..why did you get married and father a child?

Good luck with that bike of yours!

you seem most qualified to provide feedback. If I were the op I would do exactly as you say. Wise insight and advice. Hey op listen to this guy.

[473geo]

As been said, take your lad back to his mum and do not stay in the village for any period, get what ever stuff she lays out for you and go back to Udon, if time left in Thailand rent a room for now and then weigh up options (the relationship is over) If no time left in LOS go home. ( similar happened to my older brother same age as you and basically same M O, built house etc in village, younger Mrs, had a sprog, Mother in law moved in with Lazy ar$ed no good younger Brother in law and Granny, 3 months later - Finished. Kid is okay , my brother visits every few months just an hour or two with his lad, he lives 100K away and re-married again - he's daft as a brush?? Anyway Good luck mate...

What is with these guys? You can kind of forgive misjudging a person's character after a short period of courting, but how can you, as many of these guys do, go through a long period of courting, then get engaged, then get married, then settle down together, then have baby number one, then baby number two...and then, all of a sudden realise the wife is a monster. Is it really possible that the woman has suddenly changed from good to bad, or do these guys have simply no idea what a good person and what an evil selfish bitch looks like? Makes you wonder. Can only assume their 'other brain' has been put in charge.

Condensed version

While the Thai woman is living abroad sending money back, all is good, the family can state without fear of contradiction she is doing really well

On return to the village there is then immense pressure to show this is the case. If this does not happen, nasty pointed remarks can abound placing considerable pressure on the wife

The failure of a partner to alleviate this immeasurable potential loss of face, and ridicule, by providing a home for his wife and child would undoubtedly raise question regarding the sustainability of the relationship from all sides

Unless guys are fully conversant with village ways and expectations, they hit this situation unprotected, unprepared.......

[Cantankerous]

Seems to me the wife had enough of you.

Go back to her, be sincere with her and promise her you will change your attitude towards her.

A good thing also is to get a bunch of nice flowers for her.

Good Luck to you.

Seriously this has to be sarcasm, but there again I come across your posts daily... She allegedly threatened to kill him, with the backing of the family! If there's an attitude adjustment required, I would say the Mrs is well over due for one...

As for the wife having rights over the kid, not a chance. From the OP's description of family life in the boondoo he'd be dragged up like an extra from the lord of the flies.

[ExPratt]

<script type='text/javascript'>window.mod_pagespeed_start = Number(new Date());</script>

Seems to me the wife had enough of you.
Go back to her, be sincere with her and promise her you will change your attitude towards her.
A good thing also is to get a bunch of nice flowers for her.
Good Luck to you.

Seriously this has to be sarcasm, but there again I come across your posts daily... She allegedly threatened to kill him, with the backing of the family! If there's an attitude adjustment required, I would say the Mrs is well over due for one...

As for the wife having rights over the kid, not a chance. From the OP's description of family life in the boondoo he'd be dragged up like an extra from the lord of the flies.

To be fair I wouldn't take the threat to kill from Thai bird who has lost it and ranting, seriously. I don't understand the ":Support of the family part" Do they approve all of her hits ?

[rixalex]

It has been very difficult for me, but because I love my wife and child and have learned to love her family and their culture I have made countless concessionsin order to make it work.

Of course there are times in a relationship when one must concede to the other, but start doing it countless times, I fear you would soon become just the spineless pussy whipped family member who nobody respects.

If you don't stand your ground on the things that really matter, such as death threats, you are on a very steep slippery slope.

[ggt]

I just don’t know how this could of happened.

I am sure that it is of little consolation...but there are hundreds of stories very similar to yours...

Take the threat to do you harm seriously...protect yourself and your son...try to secure a lawyer if you are concerned about dividing up the spoils...

You seem like a decent chap...who has just been "punked"...Thai style...

Good Luck...don't give up your son...

[nithisa78]

Be Gentle: "Be gentle; love even your enemies; be tolerant."

Jesus, To John

[KamalaRider]

" Wife changed when she got back to the village"

I'll bet she had to change a lot for you when she went to your country as well!

Maybe it should be your turn to change for her now?

"She flew into a rage and said I did never want to be here and I don’t like the family and the rest."

It sounds like the wife is right,

Some westerners do not have the respect or understand of Thai culture and family structure needed to survive in rural Thailand.

It sounds like you are one of them.

If you know anything, you know your wife's family is more important to her than anything..not you, her family!

You were given a chance to be part of that family and have rejected them.

Either make an honest effort yo adjust ( sounds like you have not tried at all ) or move on..alone.

​It would be very wrong and bad for your child to be separated from his mother.

Like me, you are an old man.

How well do you think you can raise a young child and how many more years do you think you will be around to raise him?

I am in what could be a similar situation.

My Thai wife lived with me in the US for 6 years before we and our 3 year old child relocated to her village in rural Thailand.

It has been very difficult for me, but because I love my wife and child and have learned to love her family and their culture I have made countless concessionsin order to make it work.

If you truly love your family, you can make it work also.

If you only truly love yourself..take your self and your wonderful Honda somewhere else.

Footnote: It seems you are more concerned about your prize Honda than your family..why did you get married and father a child?

Good luck with that bike of yours!

you seem most qualified to provide feedback. If I were the op I would do exactly as you say. Wise insight and advice. Hey op listen to this guy.

OP, don't listen to these men, they live in la la land. They have created a world of their own.

[rixalex]

<script type='text/javascript'>window.mod_pagespeed_start = Number(new Date());</script>

Seems to me the wife had enough of you.

Go back to her, be sincere with her and promise her you will change your attitude towards her.

A good thing also is to get a bunch of nice flowers for her.

Good Luck to you.

Seriously this has to be sarcasm, but there again I come across your posts daily... She allegedly threatened to kill him, with the backing of the family! If there's an attitude adjustment required, I would say the Mrs is well over due for one...

As for the wife having rights over the kid, not a chance. From the OP's description of family life in the boondoo he'd be dragged up like an extra from the lord of the flies.

To be fair I wouldn't take the threat to kill from Thai bird who has lost it and ranting, seriously. I don't understand the ":Support of the family part" Do they approve all of her hits ?

I'd take it seriously for two reasons. One is that she might actually be serious. It has been known. Two, this is not something someone who supposedly loves you would ever say, heat of the moment or otherwise. They just wouldn't.

[Shiver]

I know as foreigners we have a lot to say about village/education/love/money etc, but from their side of things, so long as the boy can be happy then it's probably better to set him free into that environment and be able to blend in rather than being brought up in a (to him) foreign country (although he's still in his formative years, so not too late I guess, should you feel there is more benefit to him in having an education/social behaviour that makes him think like us, and all the implications involved in that if he wanted to return to his origin country).

The wife is definitely off the cards afaict. I wouldn't offer any money at all to 'bargain' for my child - just decide if you want to fight to the ends of the earth, or set him free. More the issue is how you would feel in letting go, and how you could find a way to make it clear to the boy in the future how he can contact you at any time should he wish to.