Jump to content

Marriage to hi so girl


PeVee1st

Recommended Posts

Sorry to say your son has taken the Thai marriage hit. Sho sounds part Chinese if so and they where Hi So they would not allow the daughter to marry a Falang with none unlimited money. The worst decision he is making is to move in with them.

My Thai wife's daughter got married yesterday, we negotiated sin sod at 250,000. Which is a lot for normal villagers, we supplied the big party with music, drinks, food and many many other things.

If he has handed over money already his brains have transferred down to the small head below, sorry,this is the big problem with the Falang,

Will be difficult for him to make a living here but tell him to stay clear of a business venture with the girls family he will sign his death warrant.

He will not get the money back for sure.

Where did he meet his GF.

My daughter in law is 18 she does dancing at party's that have a large music stand, now she has her own dance girls and runs the business he boy friend now husband is 24 he is a singer at these party's so they have a good little business going.

Best of luck.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

A newly married man asked his wife,

'Would you have married me if my father hadn't left me a fortune?'

'Honey,' the woman replied sweetly,

'I'd have married you, NO MATTER WHO LEFT YOU A FORTUNE!'

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think your boy is old enough to decide what he wants. And if he wants that girl....what is the problem? Let him have his own experience even it tastes bitter after a while.

If he needs your advice he will ASK you. Don't interfere and offer advice if it is not requested. He can sort everything by his own. Believe me.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Any decent middle to upper class Thai woman would never consider getting involved with a farang,

There are tens of thousands of Thai girls studying in UK, USA and Australia. Their social standing ranges from hiso to middle class.

If you think none of these girls date farrangs you are deluded.

Of course many date them when they are far away from their families but mostly would not marry them. Even Thai students studying overseas have an urge of dating and enjoy some pleasures far away from their parents.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

"I think you and I draw a different line on the definition."

OK, how do you define it then?

Because typically wealthy families with long history or those with titles are what one would usually consider HISO. There are members of the Singh family which is a very HiSo family that have members married to foreigners.

There have been some very high society weddings in the papers over the past few years that were mixed marriages.

Their are only three Indian families that are part of the Thailand Economy. They are the Narula's, Srichawla and the Shah family. Most of the Singh's in Thailand run money lending and tailor businesses.

The Narula and Srichawla families do not mix up with farangs in marriages. I know all 3 families and never came once across a farang.

HiSo is a bad word to use really.

I know many well off Chinese Thai's why control three of the banks in Thailand and as well many other businesses but they do not intermarry with foreigners, except one Banker that married a Swedish woman

There are about 65,000 Indian Thai with full citizenship. However, there are about 400,000 persons of Indian origin settled in Thailand mainly in the cities.
Notable people[edit]
Savika Chaiyadej - Thai soap actress
Napakpapha Nakprasitte - Thai actress and Model
Ratana Pestonji - Thai film director, producer, screenwriter and cinematographer
Vidya Dhar Shukla - Chief Hindu priest of Thailand
Ammar Siamwalla - One of Thailand's most prominent economists
Santi Thakral - Member of the Privy Council of King Bhumibol Adulyadej of Thailand
Nishita Shah - Businesswoman
Aloke Lohia - Billionaire Businessman
Lek Nana - Businessman and Politician
Kalayil Thomas Varghese - Notable Bureaucrat in Thailand
Chalida Vijitvongthong - Thai actress and model
Wiki

Aloke Lohia is not Thai and the only person in your list that makes it in the list is NIshita Shah the daughter of the Kirit Shah.

I wonder how many of those in your list are married to farangs.

The Srichawla family owns many hotels in Thailand such as the Hotel Muse, Grand Millennium Sukhumvit Bangkok, Novotel Bangkok Ploenchit Sukhumvit, 8 Hotels in Germany and two in the UK. The family also has controls in Red Planet Hotels which runs hotels in Thailand, Japan and Indonesia (20). Then on top they own the franchise for Tune Hotels (Air Asia) in several countries such as China, Indonesia, Philippines, Thailand, and Bangladesh.

The Narula family is the second in line in terms of assets. They too own many hotels in Thailand and around 20 alone on Sukumvit including the Sheraton Grande. Another family member has interests in the Grand Hyatt on Sukhumvit (2017), several Sheraton Hotels in Hua Hin, the Westin Grande and some condos.

All in all almost any family member of the 3rd generations owns a couple of buildings and their are at least 20-30 of the 3rd generations.

The third family is the Shah family which runs GP Group (eg Precious Shipping, Mjets Thailand).

I have dealed with all three families in the past 26 years but never met anyone that was dating a farang men or woman. All are Thai Indian tycoons and they even have a small number of managers that are farangs (5-7%) throughout their companies. They are very humble, always save money and in business very simple. Only when their is a marriage the weddings are always grand style.

The 3 families combined should be around 650 people's and are the Top1% of Indian Thai's in Thailand.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Why does everyone here seem to think that thais having Chinese lineage is a good thing? I don't get it. Last I saw China is still a developing country, even after 5,000 years of culture. Famously responsible only for inventing chopsticks, their greatest achievements seem limited to copying other people's good work. They even had a copy of the iwatch before it was released. Australia has been settled for just over 200 years and is a far more advanced society than the Chinese.

I have traveled extensively in China, and after looking at Chinese women

and Chinese culture there , I agree that Chinese blood here should be

looked at as a detriment. :-) They immigrated here and went through

Thailand like a hot knife through butter . So now they have all the money

here and look hiso......

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Since you've asked our opinions, it sounds like your son has fallen into the clutches or a typical money grubbing middle class Chinese family. There are many bad signs, such as reneging on financial things that have already been agreed and going back to the well for more all the time. In really hiso families all of this stuff is negotiated with the family by an intermediary who is respected by both families and whatever is agreed is final. They know that your son has no money and no job, so they are trying to squeeze as much money out of you as they can before there is an inevitable falling out and the gravy will stop flowing from your side. You don't mention anything about the financee trying to make things easier for you or your son, which suggests that she isn't. Her job is to push her family to accept a much lower sin sot, so she can marry the man she loves. B300k plus a few baht of gold would be more than enough.

By agreeing to give these spongers a great deal money for no justifiable reason you are actively aiding and abetting a situation that will make your son miserable and you poorer in the not too distant future, as he will have to live with these people as a second class citizen in their house and try to start a business where they call all the shots in a country where he probably has no clue how business works. Your 2 million will be gone in a flash and they will be knocking on your door for more investment capital in no time. Far better to face reality and tell your son that you can't throw money away like this. Save it for a rainy day or to help your son buy a property or start his own business in his own name in future. If the girl really loves him, she would be willing to go and live with him in your home country and do things the way people do them over there. Otherwise, there are many fish in the ocean and he should keep looking.

Edited by Dogmatix
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Sorry to say your son has taken the Thai marriage hit. Sho sounds part Chinese if so and they where Hi So they would not allow the daughter to marry a Falang with none unlimited money. The worst decision he is making is to move in with them.

My Thai wife's daughter got married yesterday, we negotiated sin sod at 250,000. Which is a lot for normal villagers, we supplied the big party with music, drinks, food and many many other things.

If he has handed over money already his brains have transferred down to the small head below, sorry,this is the big problem with the Falang,

Will be difficult for him to make a living here but tell him to stay clear of a business venture with the girls family he will sign his death warrant.

He will not get the money back for sure.

Where did he meet his GF.

My daughter in law is 18 she does dancing at party's that have a large music stand, now she has her own dance girls and runs the business he boy friend now husband is 24 he is a singer at these party's so they have a good little business going.

Best of luck.

Shaurene is correct. Hiso families will not allow their daughters to marry a penniless farang with no job or prospects. The business families welcome an alliance with another important business family. Even though it is normal to make a pre-nup agreement that specifies each parties assets at the time of marriage to make clear that these assets won't be divided up in the event of divorce. A friend of mine was quite well off running his own business in Thailand successfully for many years when he got married to a girl from a well known Thai-Chinese business family. They considered him a penniless gold digger trying to get his hands on some of their lovely money through their daughter and tried to refuse their consent. The girl still insisted she would marry the farang no matter what and finally they accepted a senior business figure from outside the family as a negotiator and a sin sot was agreed. They married and have a happy family together but they were virtually cut off by the family whom they rarely see, which my friend says he was very happy about but is probably a source of chagrin to his wife.

I am talking about a guy that most of us would consider as very well off but was written off as a penniless gold digger, since his wealth was only a drop in the bucket compared to theirs. At least his in-laws negotiated a financial deal and were willing to abide by it. The other extreme is what happened to a Thai friend whose daughter got married to a lower middle class Chinese girl after knocking her up. The Chinese family agreed to pay for the wedding but close to the time, claim they had financial problems, and my friend had to borrow money to pay for it, as she didn't want to cancel. Then the Chinese 'losos' actually stole all the money that had been brought in envelopes to help pay for the wedding. Needless to say that marriage ended quickly in divorce after about year of arguments over money. My friend has not seen her grandchild from that liason for over 10 years but now has another from her son's second and much nicer wife.

Go figure which of the two examples of Thai-Chinese families above most closely resembles your son's prospective in-laws.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Word of advise. Tell your son to keep her around for a bit of fun but don't get married to one. They are all money hungry vampires. They are not even married yet and already with the demands.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Something is seriously wrong here.

Please .... take your time and then change some things.

My Thai Wife (now 2 months in USA with me):

- Owns her condo in BKK, has stock investments, gold mak mak, many investments.

- We paid for our own wedding.

- I gave her parents 100,000 BAHT as an "honor" and out of respect. They wanted to give it back. I refused.

- Her family is horribly poor, but they don't want my money.

Somewhere .... things got "skewed" a bit.

Perhaps, setting the "Expectation Bar" a bit too high.

How bizarre, I`ve never encountered a Thai woman from any social class that doesn`t feel obliged to take care of their elders.

That your wife has so much money, but hasn`t provided it to the family would worry me.

Then again you are probably just telling porkies like 80% of the guys on here when talking woman laugh.png

You made me smile.png ........

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I guess you're right JD. No doubt I'm the minority.

My definition of high society doesn't include what's in the supposed Hi-So trashy newspaper and magazine columns. But then, it doesn't completely preclude it.

If being in the media made one hi so, then the Kardashians would be very hi so bah.gif .

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Since you've asked our opinions, it sounds like your son has fallen into the clutches or a typical money grubbing middle class Chinese family. There are many bad signs, such as reneging on financial things that have already been agreed and going back to the well for more all the time. In really hiso families all of this stuff is negotiated with the family by an intermediary who is respected by both families and whatever is agreed is final. They know that your son has no money and no job, so they are trying to squeeze as much money out of you as they can before there is an inevitable falling out and the gravy will stop flowing from your side. You don't mention anything about the financee trying to make things easier for you or your son, which suggests that she isn't. Her job is to push her family to accept a much lower sin sot, so she can marry the man she loves. B300k plus a few baht of gold would be more than enough.

By agreeing to give these spongers a great deal money for no justifiable reason you are actively aiding and abetting a situation that will make your son miserable and you poorer in the not too distant future, as he will have to live with these people as a second class citizen in their house and try to start a business where they call all the shots in a country where he probably has no clue how business works. Your 2 million will be gone in a flash and they will be knocking on your door for more investment capital in no time. Far better to face reality and tell your son that you can't throw money away like this. Save it for a rainy day or to help your son buy a property or start his own business in his own name in future. If the girl really loves him, she would be willing to go and live with him in your home country and do things the way people do them over there. Otherwise, there are many fish in the ocean and he should keep looking.

B300k plus a few baht of gold would be more than enough.

00.00 baht plus 0 baht of gold would be better, or at least make an ironclad arrangement that you get it back.

I can't believe that so many farangs on here are actually going along with that garbage, probably because they fell for it themselves.

Are farangs so desperate to use the little head that they abandon common sense? It's not like you can't "rent" good looking women for the rest of your life for what some are giving to gold digging in laws.

As for "love" and Thai women, you have no more chance of a happy, long lived marriage in Thailand than you do of finding it back home with a woman that won't expect you to buy her.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think your boy is old enough to decide what he wants. And if he wants that girl....what is the problem? Let him have his own experience even it tastes bitter after a while.

If he needs your advice he will ASK you. Don't interfere and offer advice if it is not requested. He can sort everything by his own. Believe me.

That would be good advice except the OP is being asked to pay.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Most people with real money in this country don't show it, especially if the maker of that money is still alive and controls it.

There are some people with real money that do show it , but they really aren't going to ask you for money.

Then there is what 95% of the people that look like they have money are - lower class tax dodgers (as in most the business owners in this country) with a trail of credit behind them that one day has to be paid. Once the money from the family land sale runs out or they very fragile business (Thais aren't very good at coming up with something different) takes a down turn they are stuck.

I won't say anymore...............................coffee1.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Marriage in Hi So circles can be quite expensive indeed. 20 years ago friends introduced me to a woman they thought was good marriage material for me. It would have been costly. Her older sister had married few years earlier to a weathy thai man. He owned a large construction company in Bangkok. Got a lot of big contracts. Heres what it cost him that i know of.

The parents received a new car and truck plus 2 properties with buildings,one directly across from their home and the other near their home.and 2 million baht in cash.

Each sister of the bride got a new car one was a BMW.

The wife got a business building condos and apartment buildings and 125,000 baht a month allowance to take care of the home.

This was 20 years ago costs have gone up.

They donot call them HiSo for nothing.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The sin sod was supposed to be for show to save face so my son could invest in the business. The family agreed to this plan, but later changed their minds.

Latest I was told was 2 mill.thb.

hahahaha ha ha ha.... please stop .... ha ha ha..... cant take it any more hahaha ha ha ha ....omg it hurts hahhahahaha ha ha ha stop your killing me ....2 mil ? hahahahaha hahaha

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

The King's oldest child married a guy from California. That is about as hi so as you can get in Thailand. Foreigners do marry hi so women in Thailand.

Peter L Jensen and her were both students at MIT (mass institute technology) a highly ranked university for very smart students. The husband (about age 21) was hardly a slouch.

google "peter L jensen

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Have to laugh, that many farangs believe Thai girls with even the remotest of Chinese ancestry are Hi-so, especially considering probably the majority of Thai people have a Chinese ancestor in their family tree somewhere, including women of ill repute and the underclasses of Thai society.

Any decent middle to upper class Thai woman would never consider getting involved with a farang, in fact most Thais believe forming relationships with farangs is a step down the social ladder.

I think that if a farang has to buy his way into a relationship with a Thai woman, says a lot about the lack of amour propre regarding all parties concerned. Anyone willing to pay millions of bahts for the hand of a Thai woman, has to be a very sad individual indeed.

Most Thais most certainly do not have Chinese ancestors in their family. If they did, this probably wouldn't be a third world country. Any Chinese-Thai I've met (and there are many, purely on a professional basis I might add) are all diligent, intelligent, financially tuned in and ambitious.

Therefore, most Thais do not have Chinese ancestors.

No disrespect to you or the Thais intended.

Agh no disrespect to you but 40% Thai people part Chinese. wai2.gif
ethnic Thai 75%, Thai Chinese 14%, other 11%
approx 9,400,000
Thais of significant Chinese heritage (14% of the Thai population)[1]
up to 26,000,000
Thais of at least partly Chinese descent (around 40% of the Thai population) (2012)

40% is not most, so he was technically right.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Here my own experience marrying to a HISO-Girl: I'm running an own (good) business here in Thailand and my (Bkk)-gf had a great job (Director in an International company) with a really high salary (a few hundred thousand Baht per month) and parents who own some gas stations, 400 Rai Land, etc. When she got pregnant she asked me to marry her to avoid of losing face and parents faces. I agreed but my condition was, that I will not do any kind of preparations for the ceremony. She agreed. Then I asked her about the Sin-Sord and she answered, that she will ask her mom. And mom'mom's answer was, that she is not going to sell her daughter, (I can marry her but I cannot buy her) therefore I should not think much about that, she said. Later, during the wedding ceremony the leader of the ceremony put 1.5 Mio Baht in a bowl. I really couldn't believe it! And all the guests believed that this cash comes from my side, but it was not. A part of the ceremony was, to give the $$$ to my wifes mother,.... so i did. After the ceremony was over I asked my wife from where the money comes and she said, it was her parents money. Immediately after the ceremony, her parents gave us back the 1.5 Mio as their wedding gift and we spent it together.

Even our relationship broke up later, but she never asked me to pay for anything. When we bought something, we shared. And when we travelled, we shared the costs.

It's not correct to say that Thai people always want Farangs money! No, it's really not!!! Sometimes they give you more than you give to them!

Have you ever wondered if you adopted a more traditional Thai approach and paid sin sod that your relationship may not have broken up?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.







×
×
  • Create New...