Where exactly do we stand in the Thai social scale - Buffalo

[Pagan7]

Nor me

Sorry i do not know what sort of familly that the OP married into ,but i have been accepted as my wifes husband (not as a foreign one either) from the beginning , i am asked for advice , and spent time with all of them ,only my mother in law does not speak english and one sister ,but she gives me a hug when she sees me and "talks" to me through my wife , they stay with us here in Pattaya sometimes and 3 off them have in England ,just as we stay with them and even go away for weekends , they are just like any familly nice and kind.as for the children ,they are all grownup except one who is now 4 and when i see him he always runs up to me shouting uncle ,uncle , mind you he does pick his nose sometimes.

Sounds very fake.

Not to me.

[hellohello123]

Never had that problem whether it be family members or any other Thai person, mind you I try not to go to places with large farang population

You nailed it, Sabaidee Mai.

Treat Thais with respect and - with very few exceptions - that's the way they will treat you.

Farangs are a different breed; many more seem to be arrogant and clueless here in Thailand.

I find that those that are socially hopeless or mildly put 'losers' back home are the ones who come to a third world country and expect to be treated like a king......

Especially if they have somesort of income/pension that is peanuts back home but considerable in thailand

Edited July 28, 2015 by hellohello123

[northernphil]

I do wonder why with so many of you obviously dis-liking the people and country so much, why you are still here?

I dislike most people I meet everywhere in the world.

Where do you suggest I live?

The moon , no peeps to get up yer nose and no atmosphere.

[micmichd]

It's funny to see how this thread developed around the standard question "do I get ripped off?"

Your status in Thai society may be a direct correlation of your contribution to your community, which can be measured in multi-dimensional ways. It's not only money that counts, Thais are not that one-dimensional.

Isaan folks live in harmony with nature, and they love animals. Many kids are given animals' names when they're born.

I'm Farang, born as a leo by zodiac, and now something like a leophant probably. Or was it a singha chang?

If you would have been born as animal, what kind of animal would you wish to be?

[i claudius]

What's the problem?

A buffalo is a high respect animal in the Isaan.

They have two if them on my gf's family's farm. Now that everything is mechanized, they don't have to work anymore. They get free food and a place to sleep, they even get free medical treatment if they are sick.

Life is not so bad for a buffalo I guess

Maybe you sound like a buffalo when you speak, or look like one when you move?

Never mind, I probably look like a love-sick elephant when I dance

It should be against the law for anyone over 30 to be allowed to dance

[mikiea]

I think half the problem is large numbers of Johnny bloody farang comes to Thailand and expect the natives to kow tow down in their presence

ehhh...you sound like one ....

[Soutpeel]

I think half the problem is large numbers of Johnny bloody farang comes to Thailand and expect the natives to kow tow down in their presence

ehhh...you sound like one ....

Not even close dear boy

[Soutpeel]

Never had that problem whether it be family members or any other Thai person, mind you I try not to go to places with large farang population

You nailed it, Sabaidee Mai.

Treat Thais with respect and - with very few exceptions - that's the way they will treat you.

Farangs are a different breed; many more seem to be arrogant and clueless here in Thailand.

I find that those that are socially hopeless or mildly put 'losers' back home are the ones who come to a third world country and expect to be treated like a king......

Especially if they have somesort of income/pension that is peanuts back home but considerable in thailand

You have nailed it

[Tchooptip]

Where exactly do we I stand in the Thai social scale - Buffalo

No need to thank me for the correction

[chilli42]

We are all prisoners here but don't seem know we are holding the key.

Social status in Thailand is based on money and/or power. If you have neither then you are of no use to the locals. No Frang with money and/or power ever stands in line for anything and certainly not for something as mundane as a visa stamp. The culture is what it is, deal with it, rob a bank or use your get out of jail card.

[Linzz]

1/ The average Thai is not taught more than the most basic of manners, most of these centering around ways and silence. They don't anymore know how to properly meet a foreigner than they know how to hold the door for someone, it's simply not in their social repertoire;

2/ To the socially lower classes, foreigners can be quite intimidating. Hence, the lack of eye contact and babbling.

So it might be they don't actually look down on you.

Or, maybe they do. They could possess the huge xenophobic egos many Thais have. That's for you to discern.

Having said that, my in-laws want nothing to do with me. They think I'm going to sell my wife the minute she steps on American soil.

(Bidding starts at 10,000 baht.)

Yeah I had that too...they see what terrible things Farangs get up to on TV (television) and SIL begged me not to sell my wife if it all turned to custard (unfortunately there are laws against it in my country)

[micmichd]

We are all prisoners here but don't seem know we are holding the key.

Social status in Thailand is based on money and/or power. If you have neither then you are of no use to the locals. No Frang with money and/or power ever stands in line for anything and certainly not for something as mundane as a visa stamp. The culture is what it is, deal with it, rob a bank or use your get out of jail card.

Good idea to substitute money with power.

Can you now please define "power"?

[Bruzzzz]

They don't respect you so cut back on the family's welfare payments and see if that gets their attention.

Why do you pay them anyway?

As has always been the case "you can't buy respect" so money is not the way to get it. Show them you won't cop their crap will probably earn you a little respect but also shown the door.

Good riddance. You can do better and gain a little self-respect in the process.

[micmichd]

1/ The average Thai is not taught more than the most basic of manners, most of these centering around ways and silence. They don't anymore know how to properly meet a foreigner than they know how to hold the door for someone, it's simply not in their social repertoire;

2/ To the socially lower classes, foreigners can be quite intimidating. Hence, the lack of eye contact and babbling.

So it might be they don't actually look down on you.

Or, maybe they do. They could possess the huge xenophobic egos many Thais have. That's for you to discern.

Having said that, my in-laws want nothing to do with me. They think I'm going to sell my wife the minute she steps on American soil.

(Bidding starts at 10,000 baht.)

Yeah I had that too...they see what terrible things Farangs get up to on TV (television) and SIL begged me not to sell my wife if it all turned to custard (unfortunately there are laws against it in my country)

It's not that easy if your wife wants a job in the West. There might be all kinds of "agents" an institutions that are trying to make some money out of her situation. Would be fine if their activities would be regarded as "human trafficking", too.

This should also include financial social security institutions that are fine as long as some money can be taken from foreigners and drive them out of the country if they want something for their contributions to "the system"

Edited July 28, 2015 by micmichd

[Cypress Hill]

No Frang with money and/or power ever stands in line for anything and certainly not for something as mundane as a visa stamp. The culture is what it is, deal with it, rob a bank or use your get out of jail card.

What tosh

Not everyone with money and/or power is an arrogant douchebag who puts on airs and graces and demands preferential treatment

Quite a few people on this forum earn very well but still queue up at immigration like everyone else for their extensions, visas.

Nothing more low class than thinking a couple of rolls of cash makes you high class

[mick01827]

Nobody is actually holding a knife to your throat insisting you stay in Thailand, if you spend your money willy nilly thinking you can buy love then that's your choice but please don't moan about it, unfortunately it sounds like your another sucker chasing a dream

[doctorbobo]

I think one of the main problems is that Westerners expect Thais to act just like they think is appropriate but Thais don't.

Unfortunately, in many cases which seem to be related to the rural Thais for whatever reason, appreciation for anything they are given from a falang doesn't always last very long. It doesn't matter that you give a hunk of your pension to feed, cloth, and sustain the family's livelyhood because they figure it is ok for you to do that just simply because you can afford to.

I gave my wife's family laptops, bicycles, food and more....and none of it was really appreciated. Sure, a thank you, thank you but that is about it. My biggest concern is that things that I buy don't often have much value but if a Thai bought the item then it is always squeaky clean and in good condition. It just seems to boild down to the fact that Falangs have a source for money that Thais don't have and if they can benefit from that ....why not?

Don't ever think that Thais will ever look at you like one of the family. They won't. I was once told by a Thai: "You might speak and write Thai, be married to a Thai and have children with a Thai and even lived here for years BUT DON'T THINK THAT IN THE EYES OF A THAI YOU ARE ANYTHING OTHER THAN A FALANG. I heard that 10 years ago and have never forgot.

[doctorbobo]

I think one of the main problems is that Westerners expect Thais to act just like they think is appropriate but Thais don't.

Unfortunately, in many cases which seem to be related to the rural Thais for whatever reason, appreciation for anything they are given from a falang doesn't always last very long. It doesn't matter that you give a hunk of your pension to feed, cloth, and sustain the family's livelyhood because they figure it is ok for you to do that just simply because you can afford to.

I gave my wife's family laptops, bicycles, food and more....and none of it was really appreciated. Sure, a thank you, thank you but that is about it. My biggest concern is that things that I buy don't often have much value but if a Thai bought the item then it is always squeaky clean and in good condition. It just seems to boild down to the fact that Falangs have a source for money that Thais don't have and if they can benefit from that ....why not?

Don't ever think that Thais will ever look at you like one of the family. They won't. I was once told by a Thai: "You might speak and write Thai, be married to a Thai and have children with a Thai and even lived here for years BUT DON'T THINK THAT IN THE EYES OF A THAI YOU ARE ANYTHING OTHER THAN A FALANG. I heard that 10 years ago and have never forgot.

[gandalf12]

Definitely number 2 and most probably number 1 as well

[FritsSikkink]

you / we are not a buffalo, just a walking ATM

do you talk or wai your atm when you need money ?

maybe you are an atm, my wife has her own money

[hellohello123]

They don't respect you so cut back on the family's welfare payments and see if that gets their attention.

Why do you pay them anyway?

As has always been the case "you can't buy respect" so money is not the way to get it. Show them you won't cop their crap will probably earn you a little respect but also shown the door.

Good riddance. You can do better and gain a little self-respect in the process.

regardless of thailand or any country in the world

if you have to pay for the women directly or indirectly, its a form of prostitution.

if two consenting adults are happy with that arrangement, then its none of our business and good luck to the both of you

However, if you are deluded and think they are with you because of you are so hansum, then be prepared to be taken for a ride.

Im sureeven hugh heffner doesnt think 21 year old blonde models are in it for his wrinkles and charms

[Asheron]

I think one of the main problems is that Westerners expect Thais to act just like they think is appropriate but Thais don't.

Unfortunately, in many cases which seem to be related to the rural Thais for whatever reason, appreciation for anything they are given from a falang doesn't always last very long. It doesn't matter that you give a hunk of your pension to feed, cloth, and sustain the family's livelyhood because they figure it is ok for you to do that just simply because you can afford to.

I gave my wife's family laptops, bicycles, food and more....and none of it was really appreciated. Sure, a thank you, thank you but that is about it. My biggest concern is that things that I buy don't often have much value but if a Thai bought the item then it is always squeaky clean and in good condition. It just seems to boild down to the fact that Falangs have a source for money that Thais don't have and if they can benefit from that ....why not?

Don't ever think that Thais will ever look at you like one of the family. They won't. I was once told by a Thai: "You might speak and write Thai, be married to a Thai and have children with a Thai and even lived here for years BUT DON'T THINK THAT IN THE EYES OF A THAI YOU ARE ANYTHING OTHER THAN A FALANG. I heard that 10 years ago and have never forgot.

Well that is because no one can change their ethnicity.. even if they wanted (Rachel Dolezal).

[CrummyJuggler]

Over in the Philippines, I've heard foreigners recommend living on a different island from the wife's family. Maybe a similar plan would serve you. If you lived away from the family, you are unlikely to see them much and you can always send your wife to see them. Problems solved.

[micmichd]

OK, I'm a Farang, and will always be a Farang. Even in the country where I happened to be born.

For me, the questions are:

1. How am I treated when I come from another culture?

2. How is someone from another culture (eg a Thai) treated in the West?

Ad 1:

I love to go undercover sometimes.

As a bum, completely broke, I was treated worse than a dog in Germany.

In Thailand, I was treated like a human being when I ran out of money.

Ad 2:

Have a look at the media and find out how immigrants are treated in certain Western countries.

Try to invite a Thai to your home country, with or without a permanent address in that country. Germans will probably point you to the madhouse, their favourite asylum for deviants that they can't jail or deport.

[nontabury]

No Frang with money and/or power ever stands in line for anything and certainly not for something as mundane as a visa stamp. The culture is what it is, deal with it, rob a bank or use your get out of jail card.

What tosh

Not everyone with money and/or power is an arrogant douchebag who puts on airs and graces and demands preferential treatment

Quite a few people on this forum earn very well but still queue up at immigration like everyone else for their extensions, visas.

Nothing more low class than thinking a couple of rolls of cash makes you high class

Can I also suggest that you re-read your that last sentence.

[Cypress Hill]

No Frang with money and/or power ever stands in line for anything and certainly not for something as mundane as a visa stamp. The culture is what it is, deal with it, rob a bank or use your get out of jail card.

What tosh

Not everyone with money and/or power is an arrogant douchebag who puts on airs and graces and demands preferential treatment

Quite a few people on this forum earn very well but still queue up at immigration like everyone else for their extensions, visas.

Nothing more low class than thinking a couple of rolls of cash makes you high class

Can I also suggest that you re-read your that last sentence.

I don't need to but I'm sure you'll give me some kind of Yoda bullshit on how it contradicts the flows and eddies of the Force.

[micmichd]

OK, I'm a Farang, and will always be a Farang. Even in the country where I happened to be born.

For me, the questions are:

1. How am I treated when I come from another culture?

2. How is someone from another culture (eg a Thai) treated in the West?

Ad 1:

I love to go undercover sometimes.

As a bum, completely broke, I was treated worse than a dog in Germany.

In Thailand, I was treated like a human being when I ran out of money.

Ad 2:

Have a look at the media and find out how immigrants are treated in certain Western countries.

Try to invite a Thai to your home country, with or without a permanent address in that country. Germans will probably point you to the madhouse, their favourite asylum for deviants that they can't jail or deport.

[Cypress Hill]

[Linzz]

OK, I'm a Farang, and will always be a Farang. Even in the country where I happened to be born.

For me, the questions are:

1. How am I treated when I come from another culture?

2. How is someone from another culture (eg a Thai) treated in the West?

Ad 1:

I love to go undercover sometimes.

As a bum, completely broke, I was treated worse than a dog in Germany.

In Thailand, I was treated like a human being when I ran out of money.

Ad 2:

Have a look at the media and find out how immigrants are treated in certain Western countries.

Try to invite a Thai to your home country, with or without a permanent address in that country. Germans will probably point you to the madhouse, their favourite asylum for deviants that they can't jail or deport.

I understand you totally but this must mean that there are different farang cultures too. In NZ my Thai wife and her kids are accepted with open arms because I do and culturally kiwis (mostly) don't judge people by the color of their skin.

[fred Kubasa]

Gedouttahere ! Buffalo dies they wail, pray, cry for a month, you die they say, once," WHO? " and then continue eating !