Sin Sod

[ScotBkk]

Personally, I think Sin Sod is a great scam.

All us Farangs are here to be used & abused on a daily level, we can’t complain - it’s their birthright. It’s well deserved too. We should all go the whole hog buying into their land development schemes to include purchases of trucks, shared bank accounts, iPhones for all the family, remunerations for all your new relations. You can sit on the best place on the floor eating your spicy chicken feet soup with a good portion of E.coli sauce and Salmonella flavouring flaying your arms in the air screaming out "aroi" for all and sundry to laugh at you. Yes, soon the covert meetings will begin on how to stretch out more funds from you. (or even your neck) once your no longer affluent.

Yes, live the good life now. Remember, they only have your welfare in mind. It would bring a tear to a glass eye. You’ll become a fully-fledged member to the Farang Thais Apologists Club in no time adorned by your free amulet for services rendered.

Be a silly Sod – live in Sin.

I looked at the Thai wedding adverts on the Thaivisa page above and was immediately prompted to buy wedding gifts from the Alibaba website. I then looked to the right side of the page - and just decided to have tooth implants haha

[Patsycat]

A friend of mine in Dubai told me i am worth about two goats!! Not even the oldest camel thrown in!!

[Nomyai]

she is saying " i dont know"?? Of course she knows. If she doesn't want it then trust me she will say it directly that its not required and she can convenience her parents too.

you are going to marry her not her family? though in many cases its like marrying the whole family along.

make things very clear with her.

Concurred! Age appropriate couple-you are so far ahead of the game.................hahahahaha.

[Nomyai]

I made a mistake with my sin sod. I did not understand the culture and face that goes with Thai culture. (hopefully I do now) My fiancé asked that I put 1,000,000 TB on the floor on our wedding day. I placed 100,000 on the floor and my Aussie friends who witnessed my wedding had put $100 notes there to. But I also had a large collection of gold coins in a book. These were taken from their carefully, years long presentation and thrown on to the small pile of money. I was horrified. The 50 odd people who surrounded the counting of the money and seemed unimpressed suddenly had smiles on their faces. We had an outdoor wedding reception. Under large tents with a catering team of locals. Hundreds from the village came with envelopes of money. Huge speakers blasted out music.

My wife said, you give me large face to my village. Now we have built a very nice modern house in the village. My Aussie mates call it the Taj Mahal. My adopted children call me papa and dad. I loathe cats, but 5 cats have adopted me. I had had one claw its way up my leg to be in my arms. They chase the dogs away that threaten our chickens and ducks. They have also warned me about snakes before I saw them, never saw so many snakes in my life.

So it is all about face but ultimately it is all about love. And a wonderful life in Thailand, a good wife, beautiful village people that will do anything for you. I will always make sarcastic remarks about some losers that just don't get it.

Payment doesnt always have to be upfront sin sod as you experienced. A TAJ MAJAHAl in the village-- who are you trying to deceive? The fine members here?

If im a village people id be pissed @ a dude like you rubbing your money in my face! Watch out sir-flashing your wealth in the village could get one killed.

[fang37]

I paid no Sin Sod but I paid a lot of $$$ later.

[F4UCorsair]

Up to you. I paid with pleasure and it was returned to my wife. Its a matter of tradition and giving big face. I am happy to do this any day. If was being married in another country I would follow the customs of that country.

What if you'd married a Thai in YOUR country? Would you still feel the need to big note, or would it be your country, your custom, therefore no sinsod?

[brewsterbudgen]

Up to you. I paid with pleasure and it was returned to my wife. Its a matter of tradition and giving big face. I am happy to do this any day. If was being married in another country I would follow the customs of that country.

What if you'd married a Thai in YOUR country? Would you still feel the need to big note, or would it be your country, your custom, therefore no sinsod?

I'd say his post is self-explanatory. Like most respectful and considerate people he follows the customs of the country he is in.

[onthemoon]

Are you Thai? NO

Are you Buddhist? NO

Do you pay Sin Sod? NO

Are you a bell end if you pay it? YES

Not sure how serious (or tongue in cheek) you meant this to be, but I took it at its juvenile face value.

Gave me a chuckle, even if others thought it necessary to rebuke you.

Every time I click on a notification that there is a new post in this thread, I see this post first (top of the page) while the page builds up.

Every time I think it's not tongue-in-cheek, it's foot-in-mouth. There, I said it.

[bwpage3]

Here are the hard facts. If you don't have any money, you cannot afford to get married period.

Your GF is sending you the signal right now, that Sin Sod is important or she would have said otherwise.

I would take a guess and say the second leading cause of divorce, after infidelity in Thailand, is LACK of money.

No Thai woman I ever heard of wants to marry a farang without having a new house, car, etc. for her eventual kids/family.

She, like the millions of others, has yet to accept the fact that you have no money (Don't you know according to ALL Thai girls, that ALL farangs are rich?)

She may believe your family or someone else has money and you are just keeping it from her?

They never want to believe the truth after winning the social lottery of finding a farang.

At 20 something years old in Thailand, you probably have no skill or education in your own country that you could even support a wife, let alone yourself.

In the end, this fails miserably, if it makes it to marriage at all.

Failed miserably means divorce, loss of custody of your kid and probably watching some other farang marry her and take your kid.

You have not learned the #1 rule in Thailand which is money rules!

With no money, you have already failed.

Any time a Thai girl says "She doesn't know" you are already doomed because in fact she does know.

Right now you are the only one, but when someone comes along with money to satisfy her dreams, you will be gone.

Doesn't matter if they are much older, less in shape or not as beautiful as you.

You have failed to learn the true essence of a Thai woman

[rijit]

My g/f came from a reasonably wealthy middle class family ie large house in c Bangkok owned flats shops farms ect ect. they were cool about money, pay for things or don't, no worries.it took some time B4 they realised that i really didn't like the attention paying a whole bill say for a family meal would bring. But they did it's a 'face ' thing paying it all gave instant 'face' same it seems with 'sin sod' it's bragging rights, so for the g/fs parents to gain face and trust its important in THEIR culture sin sod needs to be shown to pass hands, what happens to it after is between you and the family and on that score no one cares its been SEEN TO BE DONE that's the most important thing.

Sent from my GT-I9000 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[JoopJoop]

Here are the hard facts. If you don't have any money, you cannot afford to get married period.

Your GF is sending you the signal right now, that Sin Sod is important or she would have said otherwise.

I would take a guess and say the second leading cause of divorce, after infidelity in Thailand, is LACK of money.

No Thai woman I ever heard of wants to marry a farang without having a new house, car, etc. for her eventual kids/family.

She, like the millions of others, has yet to accept the fact that you have no money (Don't you know according to ALL Thai girls, that ALL farangs are rich?)

She may believe your family or someone else has money and you are just keeping it from her?

They never want to believe the truth after winning the social lottery of finding a farang.

At 20 something years old in Thailand, you probably have no skill or education in your own country that you could even support a wife, let alone yourself.

In the end, this fails miserably, if it makes it to marriage at all.

Failed miserably means divorce, loss of custody of your kid and probably watching some other farang marry her and take your kid.

You have not learned the #1 rule in Thailand which is money rules!

With no money, you have already failed.

Any time a Thai girl says "She doesn't know" you are already doomed because in fact she does know.

Right now you are the only one, but when someone comes along with money to satisfy her dreams, you will be gone.

Doesn't matter if they are much older, less in shape or not as beautiful as you.

You have failed to learn the true essence of a Thai woman

Obviously you don't know the true essence of a decent Thai woman.

If a girl has no net worth like the ones plying their trade in Pats, Phuket and Suk, they'll be after a man with money.

A better girl doesn't see money as no 1 when it comes to finding a mate.

I'll think you'll find it's honestly, integrity and common aspirations.

I do agree that infidelity and lack of money is the leading cause of divorce here but that's the same in the west also.

"winning the social lottery of finding a farang." Jeez man, I bet you mix with the wrong girls and circles to generalise like that.

Get around parts of BKK away from the neon lights and high heeled harlets and you'll find savvy western lads partnered with same in girl and I guarantee you money isn't the driving force to their union. It's certainly wasn't with my wife, and after four years it still isn't; both of us each have enough.

Sin sot should be discussed well prior to any thoughts of marriage so both parties know exactly where they stand.

[HampiK]

I am surprised about the big amount of "thai experts" in this forum.

Of course you not should pay a sin sot to a girl who was married already or has children. This is the case with many of the bargirls.

But I also think that many members here never saw real thai girls other than bar or ex-bargirls. At least is that what i think when i read some of the posts.

I paid sin sot and i know others (Thai-Thai) who paid sin sod as well. Yes i have to admit that some families even better educated think that a farang can pay more sin sot. And i also know some thai girls (with a bachelor or master degree) which not only married a farang for money. But what to expect from "bar experts".

I not need to pay or help the family, because they have their own money and life quite good on their money. Now the parents are retired and they do quite a lot of travel outside of thailand and this without our help. I think sometimes it is even oppsite. When we travel together for a long weekend or something like that. Most of the time the parents pay everything and not want money. When we go eat somewhere together I would say 90% of the time the parents pay the food and would not accept money from me.

What i can agree with is, that it could be difficult if you bring your thai girl to a foreign country, because she will miss friends and family. But with the internet (Skype, Line, ...) it's not that problematic anymore. And if you have time to visit thailand 1-2 times per year it will be much better already.

I know 3 other couples which are married with thai girls and 2 of this girls are not from the bar area. The 3rd is a ex bar girl. And i am actually surprised how good the marriage worked till now (Now they are married for 10 years). The other 2 couples have no problems and seemed to be happy, also married more than 7 years already.

You never should think because you were unlucky other will be unlucky as well. Else you should say never marry because I think at the moment divorce rate is little bit more than 50%. so the change of get unlucky is higher than to become lucky. There are always bad examples and yes this really exists .. not all thai girls, thai families are good. But I guess at least there are as many good thai persons as there are good farang persons.

[huawei]

Up to you. I paid with pleasure and it was returned to my wife. Its a matter of tradition and giving big face. I am happy to do this any day. If was being married in another country I would follow the customs of that country.

What if you'd married a Thai in YOUR country? Would you still feel the need to big note, or would it be your country, your custom, therefore no sinsod?

I'd say his post is self-explanatory. Like most respectful and considerate people he follows the customs of the country he is in.

Customs change..

I married in 1987 in Bangkok, met wife at work. I was informed that sin Sod was not mandatory and was becoming a somewhat outdated custom.

I have always believed passionately that if there is a farang in the equation that this should be considered. It is not customary for a Thai to marry a farang, therefore sin sod is negotiable and must never be kept by her family..their must be respect both ways.

[SoilSpoil]

How many parents of Farang ladies received a Sin Sod when there daughter married their Thai husband?

[brewsterbudgen]

How many parents of Farang ladies received a Sin Sod when there daughter married their Thai husband?

Not many I would think. Why would a farang family expect sinsod?

[fang37]

How many parents of Farang ladies received a Sin Sod when there daughter married their Thai husband?

Not many I would think. Why would a farang family expect sinsod?

50 satang?

[Mbaki]

I did and mom-in-law gave it right back after the ceremony, saying "take care of my daughter"

Same

[SoilSpoil]

How many parents of Farang ladies received a Sin Sod when there daughter married their Thai husband?

Not many I would think. Why would a farang family expect sinsod?

Not only to receive but also to give Sin Sod is allegedly a part of the tradition, not?

The moment foreign parents are not given a Sin Sod, the whole concept becomes hypocrite.

[TommyUK1960]

You are the boss.

Tell them exactly what you feel and will allow.

Up to them to accept your terms or refuse them

Simple.

Spot on Happy grumpy:

Discuss with future wife to be what you are prepared to do and not do, then come to an agreement.

Simple as that. Just make sure you discuss everything.

If you can't agree , then no marry

[bwpage3]

Here are the hard facts. If you don't have any money, you cannot afford to get married period.

Your GF is sending you the signal right now, that Sin Sod is important or she would have said otherwise.

I would take a guess and say the second leading cause of divorce, after infidelity in Thailand, is LACK of money.

No Thai woman I ever heard of wants to marry a farang without having a new house, car, etc. for her eventual kids/family.

She, like the millions of others, has yet to accept the fact that you have no money (Don't you know according to ALL Thai girls, that ALL farangs are rich?)

She may believe your family or someone else has money and you are just keeping it from her?

They never want to believe the truth after winning the social lottery of finding a farang.

At 20 something years old in Thailand, you probably have no skill or education in your own country that you could even support a wife, let alone yourself.

In the end, this fails miserably, if it makes it to marriage at all.

Failed miserably means divorce, loss of custody of your kid and probably watching some other farang marry her and take your kid.

You have not learned the #1 rule in Thailand which is money rules!

With no money, you have already failed.

Any time a Thai girl says "She doesn't know" you are already doomed because in fact she does know.

Right now you are the only one, but when someone comes along with money to satisfy her dreams, you will be gone.

Doesn't matter if they are much older, less in shape or not as beautiful as you.

You have failed to learn the true essence of a Thai woman

Obviously you don't know the true essence of a decent Thai woman.

If a girl has no net worth like the ones plying their trade in Pats, Phuket and Suk, they'll be after a man with money.

A better girl doesn't see money as no 1 when it comes to finding a mate.

I'll think you'll find it's honestly, integrity and common aspirations.

I do agree that infidelity and lack of money is the leading cause of divorce here but that's the same in the west also.

"winning the social lottery of finding a farang." Jeez man, I bet you mix with the wrong girls and circles to generalise like that.

Get around parts of BKK away from the neon lights and high heeled harlets and you'll find savvy western lads partnered with same in girl and I guarantee you money isn't the driving force to their union. It's certainly wasn't with my wife, and after four years it still isn't; both of us each have enough.

Sin sot should be discussed well prior to any thoughts of marriage so both parties know exactly where they stand.

Here we go again.

Another short term married farang know it all.

Isaan isn't Bangkok, far from it the last time I checked the map.

How much net worth do the people in Isaan have?

Net worth meaning farang school teacher net worth or something a little more lofty?

Read up on the 1000's of marriages on this forum that went upside down for money and educate yourself.

When you use the words honestly, integrity and common aspirations? Really? Really? Thai women want this?

How does honestly, integrity and common aspirations pay the bills and take care of the family?

I am sure a Thai woman wanting her own house and car is not common aspirations with a farang that can only afford to rent a flat.

A better girl? A better Thai girl? How do you define a better girl from a not so better girl?

Even the best girls can go bad, this is Thailand not Utopia.

I don't socialize in any circles so your bet is wrong.

Why in the world did your wife marry you and not a Thai?

Is she running around in the wrong social circles?

[Mbaki]

Are you Thai? NO

Are you Buddhist? NO

Do you pay Sin Sod? NO

Are you a bell end if you pay it? YES

Do you understand and respect the culture of the country you are marrying into? NO

Do you understand that Thailand is in the process of losing it's own culture?

Do you understand that Thailand is now embracing farang culture?

Do you understand that Thailand has not (yet) come to grips with it's new farang culture?

Do you understand that Thailand now is a very confused nation?

Maybe you should not tell farangs how to behave based on a disappearing culture?

Where did you read that? I'm sure it's all a bit confusing to you.

Where in Thailand do you live and how long have you lived here, pray tell?

Where did I read that the original Thai culture is disappearing?

I did not read that. I see it everywhere around me: clothes, food, social media, money, TV, cars, buildings,... everything is becoming more and more westernized.

I am not saying this is a good or a bad thing. Only observing.

I live in rural Chanthaburi, 8 years now, why do you ask?

Off topic, but "pray tell" is in my opinion an argumentative expression. Why do you use it?

Yes it is only your opinion, not fact

Although I have only been living here for 3 years, I find the culture as strong as ever and not dwindling to westernisation. Your opinion may have some fundamental observations in the larger cities or tourist areas but not in the rural parts of Thailand.

[bwpage3]

One thing I would venture about Sin Sod.

There seems to be a huge divide in opinion about Sin Sod that is probably divided by those that have money and those that do not.

It seems those that do NOT have money are extremely against Sin Sod

Those that have money are more accepting of the tradition, whether the Sin Sod is returned or not.

Sin Sod should never be a deciding factor in a marriage, however, this is Thailand and everyone has their own ideas.

One has to applaud the gents that own up and say they just cannot plain afford to pay Sin Sod, versus the radical Sin Sod haters that just don't have it.

In the villages, Sin Sod is a huge show of face and after you are gone or move on from the village, that show of face is often all the family is left with to remember you by.

It might not amount to anything to you, but to the family that is left behind it is probably a big deal.

This is more prevalent in places like Isaan.

Having pride and face that your daughter was actually worth something means allot to the Thai fathers in their own culteral way.

I paid Sin Sod because for ME, it was the right thing to do. The money was returned. There was money made in all the invitations that were sent out and returned.

It was the wedding bash of the century for the whole village and that is what every remembers most in a poor village.

Local friends were hired to cook, do dishes, set up tents, etc. and everyone ended up with money in their pocket and tons of food left over to take home.

It wasn't much for me, but to the village it was surely a highlight that my wife remembers as something more important than the gold jewelry.

You have to understand the culture from where you wife grew up as it is different between places like Isaan and the cities.

I think every Thai girl grows up having the dream where she will get to be the center of attention and have the big bash.

Some, unfortunately never get to experience this dream.

Some men will always do what ever is best for themselves.

Some men will always do for their family first.

The ones that do for the family seem to stay together forever.

[brewsterbudgen]

How many parents of Farang ladies received a Sin Sod when there daughter married their Thai husband?

Not many I would think. Why would a farang family expect sinsod?

Not only to receive but also to give Sin Sod is allegedly a part of the tradition, not?

The moment foreign parents are not given a Sin Sod, the whole concept becomes hypocrite.

Are you a "foreign parent"? If it bothers you, I'm sure you can speak to your future Thai son-in-law. Maybe he's loaded? But I would think most non-Thai families would not be concerned.

[Linzz]

You are the boss.

Tell them exactly what you feel and will allow.

Up to them to accept your terms or refuse them

Simple.

Spot on Happy grumpy:

Discuss with future wife to be what you are prepared to do and not do, then come to an agreement.

Simple as that. Just make sure you discuss everything.

If you can't agree , then no marry

Aww you're ruthless you! You Brits have life by the jugular

[Nomyai]

I made a mistake with my sin sod. I did not understand the culture and face that goes with Thai culture. (hopefully I do now) My fiancé asked that I put 1,000,000 TB on the floor on our wedding day. I placed 100,000 on the floor and my Aussie friends who witnessed my wedding had put $100 notes there to. But I also had a large collection of gold coins in a book. These were taken from their carefully, years long presentation and thrown on to the small pile of money. I was horrified. The 50 odd people who surrounded the counting of the money and seemed unimpressed suddenly had smiles on their faces. We had an outdoor wedding reception. Under large tents with a catering team of locals. Hundreds from the village came with envelopes of money. Huge speakers blasted out music.

My wife said, you give me large face to my village. Now we have built a very nice modern house in the village. My Aussie mates call it the Taj Mahal. My adopted children call me papa and dad. I loathe cats, but 5 cats have adopted me. I had had one claw its way up my leg to be in my arms. They chase the dogs away that threaten our chickens and ducks. They have also warned me about snakes before I saw them, never saw so many snakes in my life.

So it is all about face but ultimately it is all about love. And a wonderful life in Thailand, a good wife, beautiful village people that will do anything for you. I will always make sarcastic remarks about some losers that just don't get it.

If you spread tons of money around, everyone will 'love' you..

You are living in a fool's paradise

Good luck

AGREED!

Seems even the cats know a fool when they see one................hahahaha.

A taj Mahal built in the village has zero resale value!

[Linzz]

I made a mistake with my sin sod. I did not understand the culture and face that goes with Thai culture. (hopefully I do now) My fiancé asked that I put 1,000,000 TB on the floor on our wedding day. I placed 100,000 on the floor and my Aussie friends who witnessed my wedding had put $100 notes there to. But I also had a large collection of gold coins in a book. These were taken from their carefully, years long presentation and thrown on to the small pile of money. I was horrified. The 50 odd people who surrounded the counting of the money and seemed unimpressed suddenly had smiles on their faces. We had an outdoor wedding reception. Under large tents with a catering team of locals. Hundreds from the village came with envelopes of money. Huge speakers blasted out music.

My wife said, you give me large face to my village. Now we have built a very nice modern house in the village. My Aussie mates call it the Taj Mahal. My adopted children call me papa and dad. I loathe cats, but 5 cats have adopted me. I had had one claw its way up my leg to be in my arms. They chase the dogs away that threaten our chickens and ducks. They have also warned me about snakes before I saw them, never saw so many snakes in my life.

So it is all about face but ultimately it is all about love. And a wonderful life in Thailand, a good wife, beautiful village people that will do anything for you. I will always make sarcastic remarks about some losers that just don't get it.

If you spread tons of money around, everyone will 'love' you..

You are living in a fool's paradise

Good luck

AGREED!

Seems even the cats know a fool when they see one................hahahaha.

A taj Mahal built in the village has zero resale value!

That's a new take when the CATS chase the DOGS away from the chickens and ducks

[Amr]

Gents, gents, gents, .... You noticed his age ? 20 years old ? Am i right ? Whats all this discussion about a 20 years old kido found a thai chick - i assume she is in her 20s too - and wants to get hooked and he is not even financially capable of paying a sin sod and eventually wont be able to support a family ? My advice right now to him ... Bro ... Get back home .. Get a degree ... Get a descent job ... Gain some experience ... Come back here if you wish and get married to who ever!

[Amr]

Gents, gents, gents, .... You noticed his age ? 20 years old ? Am i right ? Whats all this discussion about a 20 years old kido found a thai chick - i assume she is in her 20s too - and wants to get hooked and he is not even financially capable of paying a sin sod and eventually wont be able to support a family ? My advice right now to him ... Bro ... Get back home .. Get a degree ... Get a descent job ... Gain some experience ... Come back here if you wish and get married to who ever!

Sorry guys ... I didn't get his ago right ... He is in his 20s though ... So ... Cut it short ... How much they are asking ?