How to stay in the good books with YOUR Thai lady

[fang37]

Sometimes, I think it is better to lie to your lady in order to keep the peace. Absolute truth can cause havoc.

Do you lavish her with gifts, compliments & romantic dinners?

Do you do so by supporting her parents?

The longer I am here, the less I understand about the other gender.

Those of you who suffer on a continual basis, what are your suggestions?

Those who live in perfect harmony, what is your formula?

[MaeJoMTB]

Perfect Harmony,

No need to lie ...... best not to talk to her at all.

Honey, I'm going out ....... Honey, I'm home ......

That's all you need to say.

(and sometimes a bit of foreplay ..... Honey, are you awake?)

Edited November 23, 2015 by MaeJoMTB

[bannork]

You need to slow down Fang, you're running much too fast, the formula to success is to survey the landscape before planting your guy ropes.

Of course you could well be a troll, a reincarnation of a past poster who will disappear as fast as he arrived.

Whatever....

[CharlieH]

"Those of you who suffer on a continual basis"

if that was the case I wouldnt be with her !,

"the less I understand about the other gender"

That has been and will continue to be one of life's mysteries.

[JoopJoop]

Love her. It's not hard.

[bannork]

Love her. It's not hard.

You may have hit the nail on its head in your last sentence.

[Supaluke]

The headline really should be:-

How to stay in the good books with YOUR (Thai) lady

The rules haven't changed from the West, apart from paying a bit more attention to the broader concept of 'Family'

Edited November 23, 2015 by Supaluke

[pgrahmm]

Does not take much...

She never asks for a thing and is happy when those around her (family) are happy - everybody wins.....

Never have to play the placate game in our house.....

Only thing on demand is family time → but free time is readily available for me without tracking/phone calls....she's happy at home with our girls....

Alcohol runs in my family line (not hers) → but she is too good a woman to burden with that - so - I do not....

To my gain....

[wow64]

Be honest... Then you are not setting yourself up for failure..

If you are going out tell her.. If you are not sure when you will be home tell her just that.

Show her you love her... Simple.

Problems in all relationships are usually 1 of 2 things.. Money or sex.

Edited November 23, 2015 by wow64

[SoiBiker]

Treat her like a fellow human being.

[worgeordie]

You must be very lonely and bored ,up there in Fang,better come back

to Chiang Mai,and civilisation before you loose your mind

The secret is just get on with it,and do your best,that's worked for

me for 30 years, Oh, and keep them busy,don't give them time to think too much.

regards worgeordie

[manarak]

maybe give her quotes from famous people?

[kenio]

Be honest... Then you are not setting yourself up for failure..

If you are going out tell her.. If you are not sure when you will be home tell her just that.

Show her you love her... Simple.

Problems in all relationships are usually 1 of 2 things.. Money or sex.

And verbal communication.

[DonaldBattles]

Accept that with most Thai women you can not carry on a sensible conversation. Further if you ask a yes or no question you get a 15 minute answer that does not answer your question. Do not try to discuss current events and don't discuss anything outside of Thailand. You are not going to have any intellectual enjoyment from a conversation. BETTER TO KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT AND SUCK IT UP! A CLOSED MOUTH CAN NOT START AN ARGUMENT.

[sanuk711]

Problems in all relationships are usually 1 of 2 things.. Money or sex.----wow64

I find I can always have sex if I leave a note on my wife's pillow..........How good the sex is depends if its a 500 Baht note or less...........

[smotherb]

Let's see; gifts and money, support her family, don't start an argument. That seems to be the brunt of most of your relationships. So, it ought to be easy; just give her more money. let her do anything she wants, and don't say anything about it. You may get some sex, once in a while.

[seancbk]

Accept that with most Thai women you can not carry on a sensible conversation. Further if you ask a yes or no question you get a 15 minute answer that does not answer your question. Do not try to discuss current events and don't discuss anything outside of Thailand. You are not going to have any intellectual enjoyment from a conversation. BETTER TO KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT AND SUCK IT UP! A CLOSED MOUTH CAN NOT START AN ARGUMENT.

Another total generalisation based on fraternising (I suspect) with someone from a totally different social, economic and intellectual class.

[SoiBiker]

Accept that with most Thai women you can not carry on a sensible conversation. Further if you ask a yes or no question you get a 15 minute answer that does not answer your question. Do not try to discuss current events and don't discuss anything outside of Thailand. You are not going to have any intellectual enjoyment from a conversation. BETTER TO KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT AND SUCK IT UP! A CLOSED MOUTH CAN NOT START AN ARGUMENT.

That doesn't really sound much like a relationship.

[bbbbooboo]

Lol.....I have my Thai wife tuned out most of the time and say little as possible that gives out important information. Money seems to make them more agreeable, in many ways it's like dealing with a child

[1FinickyOne]

I go into a store and can buy what I like in three minutes. I can do the grocery shopping in ten minutes. I don't like to shop.

My wife can take ten minutes looking at stuff that she doesn't have any intention of buying.

I don't enjoy "shopping" - My wife enjoys "shopping" -

I don't see the fun it but she does -

Where is the harm? I can bitch her out that she is wasting time but why? I can go have a coffee and read a book.

I think you can extrapolate this out - you should by now know what your wife enjoys and does not. You should have known that before you got married. Figure it out. Help her to do the things she enjoys and maybe she will help you do the same. It is not that complex.

[dotpoom]

Easy...I just write my name at the top of every page.

[georgemandm]

Accept that with most Thai women you can not carry on a sensible conversation. Further if you ask a yes or no question you get a 15 minute answer that does not answer your question. Do not try to discuss current events and don't discuss anything outside of Thailand. You are not going to have any intellectual enjoyment from a conversation. BETTER TO KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT AND SUCK IT UP! A CLOSED MOUTH CAN NOT START AN ARGUMENT.

How true is your statement 100% right

[ggt]

I keep her fed, bred, and with plenty of bread...

[georgemandm]

Accept that with most Thai women you can not carry on a sensible conversation. Further if you ask a yes or no question you get a 15 minute answer that does not answer your question. Do not try to discuss current events and don't discuss anything outside of Thailand. You are not going to have any intellectual enjoyment from a conversation. BETTER TO KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT AND SUCK IT UP! A CLOSED MOUTH CAN NOT START AN ARGUMENT.

That doesn't really sound much like a relationship.

The op is very right most thai women no f??k all of what go's on out side of thailand most thai women are with western man for a better life and the money we are all A T M to thai lady's and that is a fact

[lanng khao]

Perfect Harmony,

No need to lie ...... best not to talk to her at all.

Honey, I'm going out ....... Honey, I'm home ......

That's all you need to say.

(and sometimes a bit of foreplay ..... Honey, are you awake?)

The only foreplay she will get off me is when I tell her to brace herself..

[GOLDBUGGY]

I don't think there is any secret in this. Each person is different and each persons wife is different to.

What I try to do is treat my wife in the same manner and fashion as how I would like to be treated by her. With respect, honesty, and faithfulness being 3 important ones for me. Mind you every couple is different. Your wife might work in the bar as a Bar Girl. In that case you may not want total honesty from her when you ask: "How was your night Dear?". Faithfulness is also a Grey Area then to, I suppose.

As to the money issue, in Asian Culture Men are expected to take care of their Families, and to extend some of their good fortune to extended families as well. I make the money in my household so I have access to all the money I need. But what if the shoe was on the other foot and she was making all the money. Would I not appreciate some small allowance to buy personal things, or to help out my parents if they needed it? So I give my wife a small allowance which takes care of her and her family obligation.

On high ticket items I pay for those. Sure it is okay to buy your wife a gift if you can afford it. But if money is tight and you can't afford it, she will understand. That is if you are not spending foolishly on yourself first.

So just treat her the way you would like to be treated. If you think it is okay to lie when you go out, then expect it is okay for her to do the same to you. If your are unfaithful, expect she has the same right. If you are drunk all the time and belligerent, expect her to find someone else and leave you. What is good for the Goose is good for the Gander.

[paddyjoe41]

Whatever you say say nothing,and a shut mouth catches no flies,just carry on as normal,most of the time you just did not hear her,Oh whats that darling,yeah ok no prob,ok darling see you later,she will give a little kiss or hug.JOB DONE,and simple no fuss,just as you want it.GIVE IT A TRY.

[Kenny202]

Perfect Harmony,

No need to lie ...... best not to talk to her at all.

Honey, I'm going out ....... Honey, I'm home ......

That's all you need to say.

(and sometimes a bit of foreplay ..... Honey, are you awake?)

more and more Maejos words are the ones to live by. Only way with these women is treat em mean, keep em keen. Generally in Asia any softness or weakness is seen as an opportunity to exploit. That's how many of these girls families control them. Abuse, ignore and exploit them from the day they are born. Said girl spends the rest of her life chasing the love and warmth she never got as a child. Farang comes along genuinely loves the girl and treats her well. She has that in the bank and takes it for granted. She treats the person that loves her the same as the people she loves treat her. But she never stops starving for her parents affection. She will never stop trying to please them and win favour. Some girls can wake up. Others dont. It's sad for all parties concerned except the greedy parents. Edited November 24, 2015 by Kenny202

[stephenterry]

Accept that with most Thai women you can not carry on a sensible conversation. Further if you ask a yes or no question you get a 15 minute answer that does not answer your question. Do not try to discuss current events and don't discuss anything outside of Thailand. You are not going to have any intellectual enjoyment from a conversation. BETTER TO KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT AND SUCK IT UP! A CLOSED MOUTH CAN NOT START AN ARGUMENT.

Why not follow your own delusional advice, and stop shouting. Clearly the level of intellect assumed in your post precludes your involvement.

[stephenterry]

We communicate. We have an open and loving relationship, and will continue to do so until I pop my clogs. She is a poor farm girl who has worked in several Asian countries to support her two children, and is fluent in several languages, including English. Her understanding of events is not insular to Thailand, and she can hold her own in most situations.

A very special woman, IMO, and not a stereotype that has been the focus of many posters on here.