drunk sexting ramifications with immigration?

[RBOP]

She already took it far by going to police. Get a lawyer and then report to the police station. Expect the lawyer will want 5 - 10k per hour or lump sum. Police will want tea money and the girl probably a months salary.

[sead]

We all do stupid things especially when we see some sexy,gorgeous females and think we have to be cool and the result sometimes becomes like this. You can always lie and say that you thought that when you sked her if she would date you she said , sure if you take this condo for 1 year, or something. need to see the complete message but you shouldnt have said youre sorry because seems you already admitted. Or simply go to her workplace and explain how you feel about this incident, realle need to see the message to know how serious it can be

Edited March 29, 2016 by sead

[Gutenberg]

She is a real estate agent. Of course she is trying to get commission. The product does not matter. Just don't buy it.

Do nothing. In case police comes they will say how much they want as bribe. Bargain it easily down to 50,000 THB. Case solved.

Remember, everything is for sale, it is just the price tag that matters. Your persona and your pictures were probably not enough.

[chrisinth]

yeah i have no idea why she felt the need to tell me my embassy would be getting a call unless shes just frustrated and trying to scare me.. lesson learned..'hoping in all likelihood its just a scare tactic..

wasnt conpletely nude and i only asked her to sleep with me... not a string of graphic language or obscene pictures

ok will not call police... just wait

Just without trying to scare you OP, what did you really know about the real estate girl?

Was she married (they don't all wear their rings, and when they don't normally doesn't mean they are available)?

Who (if anyone) was she engaged to?

What family does she come from?

Nobody seems to have added the above questions to the possible huge trouble you could find yourself in if the girl is angry enough and doesn't see a result coming through legal means.

As said earlier, not trying to scare you, but you should be aware of all possibilities........................

[johnatong]

yeah i have no idea why she felt the need to tell me my embassy would be getting a call unless shes just frustrated and trying to scare me.. lesson learned..'hoping in all likelihood its just a scare tactic..

wasnt conpletely nude and i only asked her to sleep with me... not a string of graphic language or obscene pictures

ok will not call police... just wait

Just without trying to scare you OP, what did you really know about the real estate girl?

Was she married (they don't all wear their rings, and when they don't normally doesn't mean they are available)?

Who (if anyone) was she engaged to?

What family does she come from?

Nobody seems to have added the above questions to the possible huge trouble you could find yourself in if the girl is angry enough and doesn't see a result coming through legal means.

As said earlier, not trying to scare you, but you should be aware of all possibilities........................

You are correct to warn the OP that there are other means of extracting justice which are frequently used in Thailand.

[IAMHERE]

thanks for all the help guys.. going to lawyer later today..hopefully she was just trying to scare me.. i am sorry for doing it.. wasnt even full nude and no vulgar language.. but thats besides the point..

You led us in your original post that it was the full monty. The penalty can not be that bad and besides it only happened because of inadvertent fat fingering on your phone due to drink, I'd expect a few thousand baht would get the police to laugh in her face.

Why dump the sim, if it is registered then they know who has the sim, if the sim is not registered they know who owns it.

[IAMHERE]

anyone have any idea when i should be expecting to hear something from thai police?

i dont see how calling and asking if my name is clear could bite me at this point.. just ready to know so its not all up in the air

Unless they have already laughed her off, then they may decide there is money to be made. Be sure to carry a copy of your necessary papers with you at all times.

[cat handler]

So many here saying "lose the SIM". Now I am assuming that OP duly registered the SIM card with his passport information. if that is the case and the estate agent has your phone number, then they already know everything about you. Running from them by making it difficult to contact you is only going to frustrate them and put them in a bad mood.

But you know what I think will happen? This is a fairly minor thing. And for minor things, in Thailand I have always seen the police as arbitrators to create a cash settlement between two parties to make it go away. The police want that to happen, and it makes their job easier. I bet you get a call back to come to the police station and settle. Now this is all assuming that the woman does not INSIST on filing a criminal complaint, but I bet the police try to talk her out of that. And if you did get an offer to settle, I do not think you want a lawyer there.

It's hardly a minor thing, it's on par with walking up to someone you don't know at a bus stop and exposing yourself, just because he did it with a phone and handed the police hard evidence doesn't make it any less of a crime. You also have to consider this is Thailand, a very conservative country, think the controversy recently because a couple held hands and hugged in photos take in Isaan. The Thai police could consider this a serious offence, and of course the OP doesn't even know the woman or what her family do for a living, a police officer maybe?

[eddybangkok]

Jesus op grow a pair stop being so paranoid

[BritManToo]

It's hardly a minor thing, it's on par with walking up to someone you don't know at a bus stop and exposing yourself,

No, it's more on a par to jogging along a road with no shirt on, just your running shorts.

Considered poor form in Thailand, but not an offence.

[james.d]

It's hardly a minor thing, it's on par with walking up to someone you don't know at a bus stop and exposing yourself,

No, it's more on a par to jogging along a road with no shirt on, just your running shorts.

Considered poor form in Thailand, but not an offence.

Considered on a par by whom? "poor form in Thailand"...the act was directed to someone personally and therefore not to the general public "as jogging along a road". I feel the OP has taken this to heart as he seems sorry.

Edited March 29, 2016 by james.d

[smotherb]

This is Thailand. Money will solve the problem, as usual.

How does money solve the problem? The problem is the OP and the decisions he makes when he is drunk.

[geriatrickid]

Don't sweat it. Nothing will come of it. Forget her, don't contact her ever again and sober up.

[james.d]

It's hardly a minor thing, it's on par with walking up to someone you don't know at a bus stop and exposing yourself,

No, it's more on a par to jogging along a road with no shirt on, just your running shorts.

Considered poor form in Thailand, but not an offence.

Considered on a par by whom? "poor form in Thailand"...the act was directed to someone personally and therefore not to the general public "as jogging along a road". I feel the OP has taken this to heart as he seems sorry.

Sorry? Sorry for what, getting caught? Or, for acting like an ass and treating a decent woman like a whore? If it's the latter, there may be hope. Since he has apologized, the next step seems to be to try to control his drinking. I doubt an additional apology will do much good.

sorry for the whole situation and to the person involved. Where did I state an additional apology will do much good?

[likewise]

depends on how nude the pic was. If it is a pic of you bare chested I do not think it is an issue. If it is you in your undies showing your boner off it will be an issue. IMHO !

[Saastrajaa]

She did not go to the police. It's all a bluff, probably a shakedown for cash. Take the advice of an earlier poster and toss your SIM card and get a new one. And yes, seek out some information on what alcoholism is and what you can do about it.

[norfolkandchance]

I think its time to close this

[norfolkandchance]

And then again let it run

[smotherb]

james.d said, "sorry for the whole situation and to the person involved. Where did I state an additional apology will do much good?"

Where did I say you said an additional apology was needed. He has already apologized, he needs to treat the cause, not the result; an additional apology would not do it.

[james.d]

I rerading the whole thread again was incorrect in my reply to you post.

[daviddabit]

Apologise to the girl sincerely and ask for her forgiveness and hope she will drop the charges.

[jaytaylor84]

give me a f---ing break the girl was older than i was by a few years.. re read the thread i wasnt vulgar with her nor was it a full nude.. if the thai police are going to waste their time over this while turning a blind eye to whats considered the worlds biggest brothel (na na)then let them come ill pay and be done with this nonsense

i forget the part where some of you have never made a mistake..

what a miserable bunch some of you are..

[Jimbo53]

Apologise to the girl sincerely and ask for her forgiveness and hope she will drop the charges.

What charges????

[Sheryl]

at any rate im just waiting for some word from police to know if charges are actually gonna be brought...wondering will they call me or come to my condo? wait for me to just be picked up at a border? or maybe theyre doing nothing about it as it seems too minor to deal with

i could call the police myself but at the moment a but reluctant to do so...

Normally you would get a written notice telling you to report to the police station. Unless/until that occurs, I would advise doing nothing. If you get such a notice, go and be prepared to have to offer compensation. Bringing an astute Thai friend along may help reduce the amount.

But it may well not come to this. Really depends on what the woman's intentions are:

If she is looking to make money off this, as some have assumed, a police letter will come.

If she was simply angry/indignant, then having lashed out at you and achieved an apology she will probably cool off and let it drop.

I do not think having an intermediary contact her at this point is at all a good idea, because there is a third motivation none of the other posters have mentioned, perhaps because they are all male. As a woman, I think it entirely possible that your text not only offended but also spooked her. She may have gone to the police out of fear you were going to stalk or further harass her. Women do get stalked, harassed, and sexually threatened, far more often than men seem to realize. A man doing what you did after just meeting her once in a business capacity is definitely something that would set off alarm bells. Possibly she is hypervigilant because of past bad experiences. Any further contact from you - direct or indirect - will just worsen matters if this is the case, whereas having threatened you with police, gotten an apology and then no further contact from you, will gradually ease her mind.

[jaytaylor84]

any idea when i might get such a notice? she gave them my condo and room number, my line, and my phone number... i mean im not too hard to find

feeling the need to tell me the police will

be informing immigration and my embassy when in all likelihood thats exactly what the police probably arent doing makes me feel like shes just blowing smoke and frustrated in the police's lack of interest in something pretty minor

just so tired of scare tactics in this country... would like some resolution now even if that would mean going to a police station and asking if im clear

[Sheryl]

Don't do that, very inadvisable. They will smell an opportunity to make money.

Hard though it is, you need to just sit tight. Normally such notices come through the mail, probably registered mail. If nothing by say end of this week you are probably in the clear.

Definitely she was trying to scare you, but keep in mind she may have been doing that because you had scared her. (Either that or she is after $$, which one, you'll know soon enough).

You seem to be overly dismissive of what you did -"only asked to sleep with her". That is not normal or acceptable behavior towards a real estate agent or other woman you barely know and met just once in a purely business capacity. I say this not only from my vantage point as a western woman but based on what I hear from my many Thai female friends and acquaintances. Behaving towards a Thai woman who is not a bar girl and not on the make, as if she were, is highly offensive and even scary to them.

[johnatong]

any idea when i might get such a notice? she gave them my condo and room number, my line, and my phone number... i mean im not too hard to find

feeling the need to tell me the police will

be informing immigration and my embassy when in all likelihood thats exactly what the police probably arent doing makes me feel like shes just blowing smoke and frustrated in the police's lack of interest in something pretty minor

just so tired of scare tactics in this country... would like some resolution now even if that would mean going to a police station and asking if im clear

This issue has nothing to do with Immigration(yet) or your Embassy ( until you call them if arrested ).

The issue is between the lady , you and the police.

If the lady insists on pursuing her complaint you can expect to be contacted by the Police.

There is very little you can now do apart from hope that the lady does not insist on her complaint being actioned.

You should not attempt to contact the lady by any means and just hope the problem you caused goes away.

If you really want "resolution" then surrender to the Police admit your failings and be prepared to pay !

[daviddabit]

Apologise to the girl sincerely and ask for her forgiveness and hope she will drop the charges.

What charges????

Ops.. My bad.. Should say 'if there is any charges'

[joboss]

im just going to go to a lawyer when open...dont know what else to do to get something concrete

Go to the ATM, Cut out the middle man lawyer.

You already got the police to pay as well as her.

Offer something modest,, when she shows disgust at your offer,, you are in negotiations and potentially on the track out of sxxt creek.

[BritTim]

Those advising you to do nothing until and unless it becomes clear you need to are correct, I think. Definitely, do not contact the police unless they contact you.

Ignore those advising you to make it hard for the police to find you. That is how you end up with an arrest warrant at immigration.

Not knowing the young lady in question, not having seen your messages, and not having seen the photo, I do not know how much trouble you might be in. However, if she is a typical, conservative Thai woman, this will be a bigger deal for her than it is for you. She may be pretty shaken up.