Single "farang" ladies...

[KenKadz]

I see you are receiving way too much advise to your post.

All I can say is, "This ain't Kansas Dorthy". (Wizard of Oz)

"Socializing" is a pretty ambiguous term.

"Socializing" is also a term relative to the individual person.

 

[Tony125]

The Internations Bangkok Club has farang and Thai members from all over the world that meet up every month. You can Google search for their web site. You said you came here to work , you don't have any foreign or Thai co-workers that you can hang with or are you working from home? The Cinemas at Central Lad Prao have shows that are in English only so you will meet English speaking foreigners and all the Thai in the theatre speak English or they wouldn't be in there watching the movie.

[dick dasterdly]

Just now, KenKadz said:

I see you are receiving way too much advise to your post.

All I can say is, "This ain't Kansas Dorthy". (Wizard of Oz)

"Socializing" is a pretty ambiguous term.

"Socializing" is also a term relative to the individual person.

 

Unable to find a 'roll eyes' emoticon, I'll settle for .

[hotchilli]

On 4/11/2017 at 11:50 PM, eldragon said:

Bangkok is a tough place for socializing if you're in your late 30s/early 40s. Especially if you're not into the high-end scene. Then again, I don't know what people do at night back home if they're not into bars. Dinners and movies, I guess. Night markets are good, but they're a bit young. To be frank, you're gonna have a hard time meeting men, even for a platonic relationship. In case you haven't noticed, many of us enjoy the local women. I suggest cooking. Find a place with a proper kitchen. Experiment with some local ingredients. There's also travel. Take advantage of cheap flights, hotels, etc. if you can afford it.

I agree with the travel idea, buy a one way ticket out of BKK to somewhere more sociable, either a plane or bus ticket.

[smotherb]

13 hours ago, Talin74 said:

I didn't mean only men ( although that sounds good too .. lol).. back at home we all have our friends, neighbors, soccer moms .. heck even mail man.. hehehe..  I will be here for very long time and it's sad that chances of having meaningful human connections, building friendships are very slim. 

 

You mean you do not have friends, neighbors, daughter's school activities, or even the mail man here?

 

Sounds to me you need to be more outgoing. I would not recommend internet meeting sites for various reasons, but get out and meet people; use your imagination.

 

If you want some platonic relationships, join some social activities--golf, darts, bowling, the hash, daughter's school activities, Thai dancing or cooking classes, martial arts training, professional organizations, volunteer with hospitals or charities, etc. Even the pub scene you seem to want to avoid is a good place to meet others--they don't have to be the girlie bars and you don't have to drink alcohol. If you want a man, the same advice applies and contrary to a lot of opinions hereon, there are plenty of men--foreign and Thai--who would like a Western woman's company; if she were fun and interesting.  

[elgordo38]

On 4/11/2017 at 11:50 PM, eldragon said:

Bangkok is a tough place for socializing if you're in your late 30s/early 40s. Especially if you're not into the high-end scene. Then again, I don't know what people do at night back home if they're not into bars. Dinners and movies, I guess. Night markets are good, but they're a bit young. To be frank, you're gonna have a hard time meeting men, even for a platonic relationship. In case you haven't noticed, many of us enjoy the local women. I suggest cooking. Find a place with a proper kitchen. Experiment with some local ingredients. There's also travel. Take advantage of cheap flights, hotels, etc. if you can afford it.

About as level headed a response as your going to get on here. Men in your age bracket are chasing the local ladies. Patience is the name of the game for you. One day lightening will strike out of the blue. Good luck. Not to be mean but as a male with a past I always found ladies with children to be a bit of a handicap. As children become older then can become like wedges in any relationship. I have experienced this more than once. 

[elgordo38]

6 minutes ago, smotherb said:

You mean you do not have friends, neighbors, daughter's school activities, or even the mail man here?

 

Sounds to me you need to be more outgoing. I would not recommend internet meeting sites for various reasons, but get out and meet people; use your imagination.

 

If you want some platonic relationships, join some social activities--golf, darts, bowling, the hash, daughter's school activities, Thai dancing or cooking classes, martial arts training, professional organizations, volunteer with hospitals or charities, etc. Even the pub scene you seem to want to avoid is a good place to meet others--they don't have to be the girlie bars and you don't have to drink alcohol. If you want a man, the same advice applies and contrary to a lot of opinions hereon, there are plenty of men--foreign and Thai--who would like a Western woman's company; if she were fun and interesting.  

Another good list of options. 

[dick dasterdly]

19 minutes ago, hotchilli said:

I agree with the travel idea, buy a one way ticket out of BKK to somewhere more sociable, either a plane or bus ticket.

Quite apart from the fact that the OP is here because of her job, are you saying she isn't welcome and should therefore move out of Thailand?

 

Where in Thailand would be more sociable for a Western woman than Bangkok?

Edited April 13, 2017 by dick dasterdly

[jenifer d]

5 hours ago, Wilsonandson said:

Your in Thailand! Why did you come here? To socialize with westerners? Should have stayed at home.

I came here because of the Thai people not the westerners living here. I couldn't speak Thai. It's not important just get outside where ever you live and mix with the locals. After a week or two you'll start making friends and learning Thai. After a year you'll be semi fluent and have many friends. Just remember the golden rule, don't let them in the house.

i let my Thai friends in the house CONSTANTLY; only thrice (out of hundreds of times)

did anybody attempt to steal from me; once,  a Thai friend called to alert me (she was actually one of the other 2 who had stolen from me -lol) the 2 other times, i caught them

-and nobody has even pretended to steal from me since i gained respect from the locals

in the last 5 years...

[jenifer d]

3 hours ago, Khon Kaen Dave said:

So,many say, is the Bible, The koran, Tom Sawyer,Magical beast's, and where to find them.

But this is not what this lady is after. She is after the companionship of other human being's.Not religious revelation, that is bought on by blind faith, or learning the way to Nirvana. Get real my friend.

Buddhism is NOT a religion; it is a science...

but if she is after companionship, or even friendship,

she should make an effort to at least attempt to learn the language

[jenifer d]

34 minutes ago, dick dasterdly said:

Quite apart from the fact that the OP is here because of her job, are you saying she isn't welcome and should therefore move out of Thailand?

 

Where in Thailand would be more sociable for a Western woman than Bangkok?

maybe Phuket, Samui, Hua Hin- 

or areas of Bkk w/large expat populations

(since she did not state that she wanted to meet Thai locals;

a big red flag to me, since it it'ss obvious she is too lazy/arrogant/colonial-minded to bother to learn the local language and culture and customs)

 

and yes, maybe i AM saying to ALL of you who do NOT bother to learn Thai

(let alone the culture & customs):

YOU who think that the Thais do NOT want us here?

they do NOT want COLONIAL OPRESSORS who are fine with making tons of MONEY here but don't bother to learn the language

[Sooo Upto Me]

7 hours ago, BigKahuna said:

Learn the local language. Living anywhere and not speaking the language is going to make it hard to meet locals. Dont be one of those sad foreigners who cant speak Thai and has no local friends.

 

 

 

 

 

Wot a load of codswallop. I've been staying in a local village up north west near Burmese border for last 15mths, An in Pattaya las 8 yrs an I hardly speak any Thai. An I've made many local Thai & Burmese friends. 

So stick that in ur pipe & smoke it. ?

 

[jenifer d]

4 hours ago, dick dasterdly said:

Apart from the obvious good advice from a couple of posters to contact various expat groups, I'd add that you're likely to meet other Western women in day to day life once you've been here a while.  (I'm assuming that you've only been here a very short time?)

 

Obviously there are far fewer Western women than men here, and the men are mostly interested in young Thai females for 'intimate' relationships, which can make it far more difficult to find female friends and male 'partners'.  Even so, give it time and I'm sure you'll make friends, both female and male.

and THIS Western woman, (i.e., yours truly),

is ONLY interested in a THAI boyfriend!!!

i really don't have many other farang friends here, male OR female-

nor do i want any-

unless they actually speak Thai and understand the culture;

otherwise, they're just modern-day colonists  

[dick dasterdly]

7 minutes ago, jenifer d said:

maybe Phuket, Samui, Hua Hin- 

or areas of Bkk w/large expat populations

(since she did not state that she wanted to meet Thai locals;

a big red flag to me, since it it'ss obvious she is too lazy/arrogant/colonial-minded to bother to learn the local language and culture and customs)

 

and yes, maybe i AM saying to ALL of you who do NOT bother to learn Thai

(let alone the culture & customs):

YOU who think that the Thais do NOT want us here?

they do NOT want COLONIAL OPRESSORS who are fine with making tons of MONEY here but don't bother to learn the language

OK, you obviously have a bee in your bonnet about this .

 

Its not that easy for single, older Western people to learn the Thai language - but as the OP is working, presumably she stands a better chance.

[BigKahuna]

6 minutes ago, Sooo Upto Me said:

 

Wot a load of codswallop. I've been staying in a local village up north west near Burmese border for last 15mths, An in Pattaya las 8 yrs an I hardly speak any Thai. An I've made many local Thai & Burmese friends. 

So stick that in ur pipe & smoke it. ?

 

Of course

[BigKahuna]

19 minutes ago, jenifer d said:

Buddhism is NOT a religion; it is a science...

but if she is after companionship, or even friendship,

she should make an effort to at least attempt to learn the language

How is it a science? What scientific principles are at work?

[dick dasterdly]

Just now, jenifer d said:

and THIS Western woman, (i.e., yours truly),

is ONLY interested in a THAI boyfriend!!!

i really don't have many other farang friends here, male OR female-

nor do i want any-

unless they actually speak Thai and understand the culture;

otherwise, they're just modern-day colonists  

OK, you've obviously come to a decision about the OP (despite her post that she was looking for female friends too) and are determined that anyone who doesn't follow your 'path' is a "modern-day colonist"! 

 

I'd like to be rude about your attitude, but at the end of the day its your unempathetic attitude that is a problem - not the poster's, who is just asking how to make friends.

[jenifer d]

2 minutes ago, dick dasterdly said:

OK, you obviously have a bee in your bonnet about this .

 

Its not that easy for single, older Western people to learn the Thai language - but as the OP is working, presumably she stands a better chance.

hmmm, i will be 61 years tomorrow-

so <deleted> on your statement-

i set out to learn the language IMMEDIATELY when i got here 7 1/2 yrs ago-

and yes, i DO have a "bee in my bonnet" about this-

even were i to move to Sweden (where people are REQUIRED to learn English as 2nd language), i would start to study/learn Swedish IMMEDIATELY-

and i will ALWAYS state, categorically, that those who come here

to live (especially if they marry Thai woman- but regardless)

MUST learn the language AND the culture (at least some)-

otherwise you are just nothing better than a modern-day colonist...

 

i will ALWAYS take the hard line about this-

i am loved and accepted and respected in my community, and throughout Thailand, because i DO venerate the culture, speak the language,

and am an amazing musician (yes, that helps!!!) 

[jenifer d]

1 minute ago, dick dasterdly said:

OK, you've obviously come to a decision about the OP (despite her post that she was looking for female friends too) and are determined that anyone who doesn't follow your 'path' is a "modern-day colonist"! 

 

I'd like to be rude about your attitude, but at the end of the day its your unempathetic attitude that is a problem - not the poster's, who is just asking how to make friends.

i have NO empathy for those who come to LIVE in a foreign country

yet don't bother to even attempt to learn the language-

come on, be as rude as you like!!! 

(PS: obviously, YOU can't HANDLE the TRUTH!!!)

how about a private message flamewar???

i KNOW you don't have a leg to stand on- so go ahead 

[dick dasterdly]

Just now, jenifer d said:

hmmm, i will be 61 years tomorrow-

so <deleted> on your statement-

i set out to learn the language IMMEDIATELY when i got here 7 1/2 yrs ago-

and yes, i DO have a "bee in my bonnet" about this-

even were i to move to Sweden (where people are REQUIRED to learn English as 2nd language), i would start to study/learn Swedish IMMEDIATELY-

and i will ALWAYS state, categorically, that those who come here

to live (especially if they marry Thai woman- but regardless)

MUST learn the language AND the culture (at least some)-

otherwise you are just nothing better than a modern-day colonist...

 

i will ALWAYS take the hard line about this-

i am loved and accepted and respected in my community, and throughout Thailand, because i DO venerate the culture, speak the language,

and am an amazing musician (yes, that helps!!!) 

I'm not sure that I've ever seen a better example of a troll or someone who is pissed.

 

FWIW (bugger all!), I've lived here 11 years but being a single, tone deaf female - find it hard to speak Thai, although those listening to my mangled attempts do their best to understand me .  Its only on the odd occasion that they've laughed, with no attempt to understand.

[jenifer d]

8 minutes ago, BigKahuna said:

How is it a science? What scientific principles are at work?

as many Thais will tell you

(and Lord Buddha has affirmed to me personally),

in Buddhism, you are presented w/many options

as to how to find "nirvana" (i.e., enlightenment)

Buddha tells us to explore and adopt the ones that work for us...

and discard those that do not work...

nowhere is it said in actual Buddhist lore to worship him...

[CharlieH]

Keep this civil please.

 

7) You will respect fellow members and post in a civil manner. No personal attacks, hateful or insulting towards other members, (flaming) Stalking of members on either the forum or via PM will not be allowed.
 

[dick dasterdly]

And again (FWIW ) when I first came here I employed a Thai to learn the language.

 

He was great, even providing 'tapes' so that I could hear the tones etc. - but being tone deaf, it didn't work....

[dick dasterdly]

3 minutes ago, CharlieH said:

Keep this civil please.

 

7) You will respect fellow members and post in a civil manner. No personal attacks, hateful or insulting towards other members, (flaming) Stalking of members on either the forum or via PM will not be allowed.
 

Quite, which is why I have no interest in engaging with another poster's suggested 'PM flame war' .

 

But all of this is detracting from the OP's perfectly reasonable question as to how a single woman in Bangkok can make friends.

Edited April 13, 2017 by dick dasterdly

[jenifer d]

7 minutes ago, dick dasterdly said:

I'm not sure that I've ever seen a better example of a troll or someone who is pissed.

 

FWIW (bugger all!), I've lived here 11 years but being a single, tone deaf female - find it hard to speak Thai, although those listening to my mangled attempts do their best to understand me .  Its only on the odd occasion that they've laughed, with no attempt to understand.

you're a FEMALE- with a name of "dick dasterdly"?!?!?!?

 

yeah right...

 

you find it HARD?!?!?!? have you STUDIED- or even tried?!?!?!?!?

i'm NOT a troll- nor am i pissed!!! (but i think i will go get some beers, NOW!!! lol)

but i have ABSOLUTELY NO RESPECT for those who come to live here but joke about "find it hard to speak Thai"...

 

and if they RESPECTED you (or you REALLY tried), they would actually CORRECT you, with a smile...

[dick dasterdly]

Just now, binjalin said:

Most Asian woman look old 40+ actually and 50+ they look really rough

Agree to a certain extent as there are some older Thai women that look more than their age - and some that look half their age!

 

But this has nothing to do with the OP's question.

[gemguy]

Welcome to Thailand....

Not what you thought....but the illusion remains attractive in some ways.

Give it time ..you will find your comfort zone.....  but learn to not expect too much and learn to tolerate all too many disappointments.

Cheers 

Edited April 13, 2017 by gemguy

[binjalin]

1 minute ago, dick dasterdly said:

Agree to a certain extent as there are some older Thai women that look more than their age - and some that look half their age!

 

But this has nothing to do with the OP's question.

you're right I apologise but was led astray by the poster who chucked this in the mix  lol  back on-topic

 

yes very difficult to meet other farangs for friendships especially if you are a farang woman

[dick dasterdly]

Just now, jenifer d said:

you're a FEMALE- with a name of "dick dasterdly"?!?!?!?

 

yeah right...

 

you find it HARD?!?!?!? have you STUDIED- or even tried?!?!?!?!?

i'm NOT a troll- nor am i pissed!!! (but i think i will go get some beers, NOW!!! lol)

but i have ABSOLUTELY NO RESPECT for those who come to live here but joke about "find it hard to speak Thai"...

 

and if they RESPECTED you (or you REALLY tried), they would actually CORRECT you, with a smile...

OK....

 

Probably time for the mods to intervene and point out that you're not only subverting a thread, but also need to change your rude, arrogant attitude.

[CharlieH]

If anyone has s problem, use the report function available on every post.

 

Back "on topic" please.

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