Questions about getting old in Thailand.... personal things

[BuaBS]

I need at least my 7 hours of sleep , all be it with the aid of a pill . I hate waking up to pee !

Worst so far about aging , is the need for reading glasses , I REALLY hate them.

Libido is in sync with the quantity & quality of porn , I download

[Denim]

Just turned 60. Sleep like a log every night ( having conquered GERD).

Never been grumpy or angry all my life. Do find that I don't have as much patience or energy as before so I have my own mantra . ' Forget it.......tomorrows another day .....by gods grace '

Don't fret or worry because serves no useful purpose. Libido is good but not as raBid as before. 

If you have trouble sleeping try Domirax anti hystamine tablets. Cheap,legal effective and safe. Wife has one every other night. No crazier than usual.

Don't worry......be happy.

[connda]

I was a Type-A, driven personality even after I retired, and suffered from insomnia constantly.
In the last couple of years, I've accepted my mortality, lightened up, stopped taken things so damn serious, moved my personality toward a Type-B personality, and I sleep 8 to 9 hours a night without a problem.
Libido?  When you get into your 60s the number of women who starts to look pretty hot expands exponentially.  As long as I have a pulse, I'm still a man.  I enjoy the opposite sex!  
See - you have something to look forward to!  

Edited October 2, 2017 by connda

[connda]

2 hours ago, sinbin said:

 You are suffering from anxiety/depression. I suggest a visit to a Psychiatrist and get help. Seriously. Been there done that.

You are not suffering from anything unless diagnosed as such.  And before you ever think about augmenting your mood with drugs, research what they do to you.  Exercise, resistance training, yoga, meditation, self-acceptance, and find some friends.  Doctors, especially shrinks, do not necessarily have the answers. Imho, you're better off establishing a support group called friends and buddies who you can hang out with and talk to at a personal level.   

[Nice Boyd]

7 hours ago, ghworker2010 said:

Im fast approaching middle age and finding that Im not sleeping very well here in Thailand. I often wake up in the wee hours and can't stop thinking about things. I can't get back to sleep.

 

A lot of the respected members on this forum are in their 60s and 70s and thus I would like to know how many hours per night on average do you get?

 

I feel my level of happiness is also slowly going down as I get older. Im getting angry all the time at little things. Is this normal when you get older. I read about a guy on this forum that has a mantra that he says to himself everytime he gets angry:  'I need to lower my expectations'.   'I need to lower my expectations'  'I need to lower my expectations'

 

I now say that to myself as soon as I get the shits about something.

 

Finally, what about your libido? From 50 onwards do you find yourself less interested? 

 

 

You have middle of night insomnia, pain in arse, just don't let it control you, just get up and read or computer, till sleepy

[Nice Boyd]

4 hours ago, kenk24 said:

Sleep patterns have changed noticeably - I still have to pee only once every night, just that it takes me 3 different times to accomplish it... and sometimes when I wake at night, I stay up for a couple of hours. 

 

Yes, things change - but I find that I am somewhat more accepting and tolerant of most things, though I have less patience for others and that is mostly in the area of people - negative people and drunks bore me and I won't hang around for it, though people in general and their stories and life experiences often fascinate me... so, maybe all in all, loving life but being much more discriminating... 

I started eating pumpkin seeds and don't get up at all, it took 3 weeks to kick- in but a handful a day, keeps me asleep, it's the copper content from seeds  on your prostrate , I believe 

[tonray]

16 minutes ago, Nice Boyd said:

I started eating pumpkin seeds and don't get up at all, it took 3 weeks to kick- in but a handful a day, keeps me asleep, it's the copper content from seeds  on your prostrate , I believe 

Are they salted or unsalted...if salted...the effect you are experiencing is water retention not a shrinking of the prostate. Enlarged prostate issues are unlikely to be resolved by pumpkin seeds.

[whaleboneman]

2 hours ago, connda said:

I was a Type-A, driven personality even after I retired, and suffered from insomnia constantly.
In the last couple of years, I've accepted my mortality, lightened up, stopped taken things so damn serious, moved my personality toward a Type-B personality, and I sleep 8 to 9 hours a night without a problem.
Libido?  When you get into your 60s the number of women who starts to look pretty hot expands exponentially.  As long as I have a pulse, I'm still a man.  I enjoy the opposite sex!  
See - you have something to look forward to!  

You may want to see an eye doctor.

[khunPer]

In reply to ghworker2010's opening questions...

Fist I shall say that I just turned 68, and I've been living permanent i Thailand since 2005, so 12-years now.

 

Sleep
My natural sleep habit is 7½ hour, which actually fits well with the 1½ hour sleep-cycles that science talks about. Normally I sleep until I wake up, and 6 or 7½ hour that is. I'm often late in bed, i.e. when I'm tired, not because the clock on the wall tells me something (believe I'm B-type). However, if I need to get up early in the morning, I plan my bedtime with 6 or 7½ hour for sleep. Having less than 7½ hour, I may sometime take a nap during the day (afternoon).

 

I know the situation with thinking too much about something at night and cannot sleep – I've tried it a few times only – but that may have to do with that we are individuals, that some worry or have more disturbing thoughts than others. I can sometime have little difficulty in sleeping if something extraordinary, or some very exciting thing, gotta happen tomorrow; believe that's quite normal.

 

Many years ago I attended a, in my opinion very good, mind control course over a couple of week-ends. One of the things we learned was to sleep, actually go straight into alpha, or dream level. Kind of same can be achieved by meditation, which is more easy to access (course or instructor) and might be worth trying to relax, and let the disturbing thoughts fly our of your head; at least for some hours, until next day.

 

Happiness and irritation-level
I can recall the small thing that irritates – the word "angry" may fit, in some situations – and yes, may have to do with getting older; or just to do with some things are different in Land-of-Smiles.

 

In general I'm extremely happy here, and I get fine along with the locals, but sometime my patience breaks – yes, the small things, but maybe something repeatedly wrong, or misunderstanding because of language and culture – and I always later regret, that I didn't had patience enough; that I couldn't stay calm and just say "mai pen rai". Some small wrong things can suddenly become "principles" – it's not the money, but... – perhaps that's a farang-thing? –or is it just because I get older? However my farang friends often tells me that they are very impressed over my patience, they would have blown up long before. It sounds right that "I shall lower my expectations"; thanks for that advise...

 

Libido
I think it's extremely individual – with a smile I would say, it's hard not to be cheered up with all that beautiful young ladies around, makes me feel like still living in my good old past – I'm lucky not to have any problems (yet).

 

But if i get distracted – for example cannot sleep because of worrying thoughts, and/or get (too) irritated or angry about small incidents – the drive is not the same, as it used to be; so there might be a connection. The latter could perhaps also be the course, for the first...

 

I often read in ThaiVisa Forum about gentlemen in their 70'ies with new 18-year-and-one-day old girlfriends, so with a very big happy smile I'm looking forward to my 70'ies...

[tonray]

1 minute ago, khunPer said:

I often read in ThaiVisa Forum about gentlemen in their 70'ies with new 18-year-and-one-day old girlfriends, so with a very big happy smile I'm looking forward to my 70'ies...

 

The smile will disappear along with your bank balance.

[Bundooman]

11 hours ago, sinbin said:

Thai driving standards are okay then?

Neither he nor I said that. Nitpick all you want - childish and pointless. That's the Asian/Thai way. Deal with it, I do and I drive a motorbike daily here in CM also a car regularly long distance  - I still sleep well at night. 

[bazza73]

11 hours ago, Chip Allen said:

I'm sixty seven and I am happy to report that life SUCKS at ANY age. It's just a matter of degree. You're welcome. I enjoy living here and I am glad I could live out my final years in a country like Thailand. I don't give too much thought to pain and suffering because they are a constant at any stage of life. I was suffering from  back pain in my thirties. It's only slightly worse now and mitigated by painkillers. FInd things to be HAPPY about and forget the downers. Cheers, mate.

Could I suggest regular massage and a couple of visits to a physio to show you stretching exercises?

In my forties and fifties, I had severe back pain, the result of finding, chainsawing, splitting and stacking about 40 tonnes a year of firewood. A physio showed me exercises. I still do 20 minutes of stretching exercises every day. I was on anti-inflammatory medication for many years.

Since coming to Thailand ( cheap massage ) I no longer need anti-inflammatories. Been off them for 5 years now.

If your back pain is a disc problem, above may not apply. I assume you have had a full diagnosis.

 

[steven100]

A couple of weeks on the piss and you'll be fine. 

[1FinickyOne]

12 hours ago, sinbin said:

Thai driving standards are okay then?

It is not so much that they are ok - they are not, but it is what you allow them to do to you... I ran into a streak of arriving at meetings w/friends and the first words out of my mouth were, "you'll never believe..." followed by a story of a near miss on the roadways... at some point I realized that it was taking too much life energy in conversation about negative stuff and it was unpleasant to recount, unpleasant to listen to and not worth the time. And eventually, boring. 

[Toscano]

My first thought is what age do you consider middle age , 50 , 60 , 70 ?  I am sure that many people , myself included , wake in the early hours and cannot sleep for thinking .  I am 80 and sometimes wake in the early hours for a pee and then cannot sleep for thinking .  Mostly I sleep 7 - 8 hours a night .  I find it helps to have good walking or cycling exercise during the day .  I also have a herbal capsule called " Valian "containing powdered Valerian ; it is not a sleeping pill , but relaxes one and stops the thinking in about half an hour , followed by sleep .  Anger about little things may be related to health problems , heart in particular , for people of some intellect Thailand is not the ideal place to live .  You have to make a life in Thailand , create things to do . libido can be a problem , I still have a strong libido , hampered by ED for which I take Kamagra .  My wife 56 , 24 years younger has little or no interest in sex , would be eaten up with jealousy if I found a lover . 

[tryasimight]

12 minutes ago, Toscano said:

My first thought is what age do you consider middle age , 50 , 60 , 70 ?  I am sure that many people , myself included , wake in the early hours and cannot sleep for thinking .  I am 80 and sometimes wake in the early hours for a pee and then cannot sleep for thinking .  Mostly I sleep 7 - 8 hours a night .  I find it helps to have good walking or cycling exercise during the day .  I also have a herbal capsule called " Valian "containing powdered Valerian ; it is not a sleeping pill , but relaxes one and stops the thinking in about half an hour , followed by sleep .  Anger about little things may be related to health problems , heart in particular , for people of some intellect Thailand is not the ideal place to live .  You have to make a life in Thailand , create things to do . libido can be a problem , I still have a strong libido , hampered by ED for which I take Kamagra .  My wife 56 , 24 years younger has little or no interest in sex , would be eaten up with jealousy if I found a lover . 

My grandad is in his late 80's.

He went to the see the doctor and asked the doc to prescribe him Viagra.

The doc was astonished and asked him why he needed an erection as he knew grandad was a widower and didn't have a lady friend.

Grandad replied he would only take half the viagra as he didn't want a full erection....just enough to stop him peeing on his slippers.

[tryasimight]

13 hours ago, Kinnock said:

I'm still working full time, and working in multiple time zones plus regular long haul trips means I'm lucky to sleep more than 3-4 hours in a stretch, and I know this can make be irritable - so for me; sleep is directly related to mood. 

 

I almost never get angry at people (I reserve the right to get pissy at airport 'jobsworths'), but equipment, especially laptops and printers, drive me nuts, especially when short of sleep.  I've been through several (expensive) tablet computers by throwing them around the office/home/hotel rooms, and the office team are entertained regularly by me throwing shoes at the printer, which has taken a personal dislike to me and refuses to print any of my work.

 

But - when I get a decent nights sleep - nothing riles me and I feel much more positive.  I've found that exercise really helps with sleeping and my mood.  I cycle and run whenever I can, and if I can do this twice a week, I stay in a positive mood and my laptop replacement bill is zero.  A modest run of 5K twice a week is enough (two laps of Lumpini Park), or a cycle of 10K - which takes about the same length of time, but is kinder to my knees.  Exercise also has a direct, positive impact on my libido.  The other thing I've found that disturbs sleep is checking messages on the mobile at night.  

Sounds like you have some disturbing deeper issues than lack of sleep.

[impulse]

16 hours ago, tonray said:

17 hours ago, catman20 said:

sleep about 10,30pm wake about 6am takes me minutes to get to sleep and sleep like a baby i also grab an hours nap about 3,30pm. libido as strong as ever pardon the pun, but it help if you have more than one lady in the frame so to speak.

Is it OK to hate you but in a nice way? 

 

He was just being mean....

[KittenKong]

I'm 60+. I live alone and have no interest at all in living with anyone else, regardless of nationality. I sleep solidly 7 hours a night. Since I was 50 I have a nap in the afternoon, and since I was 60 I often have a lie down mid-morning too whilst listening to the radio.

 

I have nothing to worry about in my own life and I rarely get really angry. That doesnt stop me complaining about the millions of things that are wrong with the world though. Someone has to do it.

[joealx]

1 hour ago, Toscano said:

 My wife 56 , 24 years younger has little or no interest in sex ,  

2

Would you say that the reason is Menopause?

[Robert Tibbs]

Oh hell, I just turned 71. I am moving to Thailand next month. Yes I do have some sleeping problems. But I get the rest that I need, but not all a once. And as fare as Libido go's. As long as there are lovely Thai woman. There will never be a problem. I think. I have been alone for almost 20 years now. I can not live on $4,400.00 a month here in the U.S. In Wonderful Thailand I know I can live well to do. So I will live in Hua Hin, and live my life too the best. Walk the beach in the mornings with my lovely wife. I look forward to have 10 maybe 15 years of happy Thai years. So guys just live a good life and most of all be happy.

[Toscano]

2 hours ago, joealx said:

Would you say that the reason is Menopause?

 

YES !  But it seems a common factor of Thai women of 50+ years .  I lived in Italy till my late 60s , my ladyfriend there 2yrs younger than me , post menopause , was hot for it all the time . 

[Toscano]

Robert Tibbs , I have a lovely wife , even at 56 , beautiful , slender , beautiful body , but very argumentative .  I do not recommend foreign men to MARRY Thai women , have a girlfriend pay as you go , it is probably cheaper than having a wife .  Thai women fall in love with money , not the man .

[colinneil]

I feel sorry for all you poor sods who have to get up[ at night for a pee, no problem for me.

Being permanently catheterized that is 1 problem i dont have anymore, i sleep like a baby.

[Jip99]

10 minutes ago, colinneil said:

I feel sorry for all you poor sods who have to get up[ at night for a pee, no problem for me.

Being permanently catheterized that is 1 problem i dont have anymore, i sleep like a baby.

 

 

You didn’t say that when you got a bladder infection! ?

[colinneil]

6 minutes ago, Jip99 said:

 

 

You didn’t say that when you got a bladder infection! ?

Tell the world why dont ya.

[MyFriend You]

Wow, reading some of the posts I am wondering when I will get old, I'm 67 and retired for the second time a little over a year now.  But I do work about 6 months a year, it's the 6 months downtime I worry about. 

• Anger, damn near non-existant, I do get pissed off at motorcycles that run up on me on the sidewalk and beep their horn for me to move out of their way - I don't move, turn and face them and put my hands out.  My lady tells me I am looking for a fight, maybe so, but they always pop off and get back on the street.  That fight will come one day, I'm still waiting for it.
• Labido, happens when it happens, I don't dwell on it, maybe that's the secret, have never turned down a happy ending, but they come a lot faster than they used too.  
• Sleep, I wake up at least once a night to pee, like most of you, sometimes I just stay up, sometimes I go back to sleep.  Take naps from time to time, they happen when they happen.  All the 'experts' tell us we should schedule naps......and stick with a schedule.  Hmmm the experts  are all in their 30's & 40's aren't they??  What do they know.
• I worry about boredom, it happens, C'mon, admit it, it happens  - some things that used to make me excited/happy just doesn't all the time, so I just let the happiness happen, I'll know it when it comes .
• Once in my early 30's I was told that I was a 'prisoner of my own environment'  because I only did things that I liked to do, and did it with gusto, maybe I have used up my allotment of "Happies".    I once disappeared for three days snorkling in Mexico, collecting oysters, not another person in sight, ate oysters for three days and drank rain water, one of the best times I ever had...........my bar room friends thought I was dead.  Nothing I like better than jumping on a train and just going where ever it goes.

[ghworker2010]

20 hours ago, connda said:

I was a Type-A, driven personality even after I retired, and suffered from insomnia constantly.
In the last couple of years, I've accepted my mortality, lightened up, stopped taken things so damn serious, moved my personality toward a Type-B personality, and I sleep 8 to 9 hours a night without a problem.
Libido?  When you get into your 60s the number of women who starts to look pretty hot expands exponentially.  As long as I have a pulse, I'm still a man.  I enjoy the opposite sex!  
See - you have something to look forward to!  

how did you move to type b personality?

[bazza73]

4 hours ago, Toscano said:

 

YES !  But it seems a common factor of Thai women of 50+ years .  I lived in Italy till my late 60s , my ladyfriend there 2yrs younger than me , post menopause , was hot for it all the time . 

NO!! Get a Thai woman to enjoy sex, with plenty of foreplay, and they are quite as horny as any nationality. My GF is 51 yo, post menopause, and she loves a good bonk with me. I am not hansum man; however, I suspect I'm the first guy to get her to orgasm.

[elgenon]

I used to have difficulty. Exercise and meditation help tremendously. MIndfulness is very good. Yoga. Consciously keep yourself in a "happy" frame of mind. No one can make you unhappy but yourself. Don't give others that power.

 

Exercise (walking is good) before you go to bed. Meditation can get you to a relaxed state.