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Posted
On ‎10‎/‎13‎/‎2017 at 8:40 AM, samsensam said:

 

i think there a just some lonely people out there. paying someone to be their gf/wife gives them a feeling of higher self esteem and self worth, and prevents loneliness, for them it's a price worth paying. as other say; up to them.

 

thank goodness i'm equally happy with my own company or with someone so anyone attempting to manipulate me into paying them for their affection will come up short. i've had some amazing relationships in thailand and none of them involved 'payment'.

 

i rarely date people who have had previous foreign bfs - and yes, it is easy to tell.

 

interestingly some of my ex's have gone on to get into relationships and marriages with foreign guys and sometimes squeezed huge sums of money out of them (when they were with me money was never an issue). one girl married and got 2.4 million baht sin sot, explaining to me the guy should have paid 300,000 max. all her family look on him as stupid and a sucker, he is oblivious. i guess the situation massages his ego and the family gets loads of cash so in a way its a win/win.

As the post pointed out, this is not a Farang Thing and only they pay for Sin Sod. I know many Thai Men who have paid as well. In fact all of the Thai Men I know who married, paid Sin Sod. My Thai Bother-in-law paid the same amount as I did, and I have much more than he does.

 

No! You never paid. You never got married either, by the sounds of it. Those amazing relationships you claim you had are with women who are now married to somebody else. So what does this leave you with? Besides memories?

 

Maybe one day Miss Right will come along and you will sing a different tune. I have been divorced twice before with Western Women, which I never paid Sin Sod for. I have also paid Sin Sod for a relationship that has been going strong and well for many years. All that I know for sure is that it cost me a lot more money getting Divorced, than it ever could, getting Married. Think about that. 

Posted
On ‎10‎/‎13‎/‎2017 at 8:26 AM, hawker9000 said:

Well said.  For me, if there were going to be no marriage unless I paid the sin sot, unless it were a matter of an insignificant token, I'd lose interest in the lady then & there.  There'd be absolutely no need for argument.  But it's strictly an up-to-you thing.  There are so many cultural issues & differences to be aware of, deal with, and plan for; this is just one.  So if it IS a problem for you, you probably haven't been digging as deeply as you need to into what marriage to a Thai actually holds in store...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

How do you know you will lose interest in that lady if her parents insisted on Sin Sod, and if you haven't met her yet? Did you turn one away because of this? 

 

I have an Arab Friend who many years ago fell into Love with and Arabic Woman and who he really wanted to marry. But she came from a Well-to-do Family and he did not. The Dowry they asked for was too much for him to pay right away. He tried to negotiate regular payments but they wouldn't hear of that. He was heart broken as they were not allowed to get married.  

 

Sin Sod is not a Thai thing. It still goes on in many countries. In parts of Africa you can still buy a bride of your choice for a few head of cattle. A few more and you can buy all her sisters to. No limit on the amount of wives you can have, as it all depends on the size of your pockets, or herd.

 

So why judge what is right or wrong? It is the way it is here and that is it. Nobody can force you to pay up, and many can negotiate out of this tradition. But it still doesn't make this right, or better. Except in there eyes only.  

Posted
21 hours ago, MaeJoMTB said:

Try applying for a marriage VISA and see what the Thai authorities think?

Not sure of the relevance of your comment as the people I was talking about  in my post are Thai  ?

Posted
19 hours ago, goonnerone said:

I have been with my Thai partner for 11 years never got married and would never pay a penny or Bhatt of sin sod if she wants to

 

considering thais can often come up with a sizable chunk of money to fund a job opportunity abroad that will afford them a better financial situation and/or more opportunity why wouldn't they also consider marrying a farang (usually improving financial future & opportunity) the same and offer a dowry to the groom?

Posted
16 minutes ago, Pilotman said:

Not sure of the relevance of your comment as the people I was talking about  in my post are Thai  ?

No marital property rights, men having no legal parental responsibility or rights towards their children?

Posted
2 hours ago, MaeJoMTB said:

No marital property rights, men having no legal parental responsibility or rights towards their children?

No, you've lost me. What has a 'Thai marriage visa', that a Thai couple don't need, got to do with those rights you quote, which are wrong in any event in Thai law.  Did you actually read my post? 

Posted

Still don't have an answer to my question. So you throw down 250k - 1mill THB in sin sot. The girl is tired of you in 6 months or changes her attitude...or just runs away. You've done your dough?

 

Everything seems so one sided towards the girls benefit. What does the man get? Pussy? 

Posted
14 minutes ago, Kenny202 said:

Still don't have an answer to my question. So you throw down 250k - 1mill THB in sin sot. The girl is tired of you in 6 months or changes her attitude...or just runs away. You've done your dough?

 

Everything seems so one sided towards the girls benefit. What does the man get? Pussy? 

If you shagged her every day 6 months for 250k, and  half your age, not a bad deal IMHO.

1M would have been too much though.

 

Posted
On 10/13/2017 at 9:12 AM, Peterw42 said:

Sin Sot, the last big bar fine.

 

I think its more for show nowadays and the money gets given back or given to the daughter as an asset/security.

 

It certainly is around here, the Sin Sot is put on display during the exchanging gifts part of the marriage ceremony which is taken very seriously, in my case it lasted for over 2 hours, the money was returned to us in the marital bed.

 

To some the marriage certificate seems to be a bit of a side issue. I happened to get mine about 6 months before the wedding but couldn't share a room with my wife at the family home until after the wedding.

Posted
2 hours ago, MaeJoMTB said:

If you shagged her every day 6 months for 250k, and  half your age, not a bad deal IMHO.

1M would have been too much though.

 

sin saut not a good investment when you consider "old cow, new cow"

 

 

Posted
On 13/10/2017 at 8:40 AM, samsensam said:

i think there a just some lonely people out there. paying someone to be their gf/wife

 

I see plenty of those in Pattaya, mainly foreigners

Posted (edited)
On 10/13/2017 at 8:40 AM, samsensam said:

 

i think there a just some lonely people out there. paying someone to be their gf/wife gives them a feeling of higher self esteem and self worth, and prevents loneliness, for them it's a price worth paying. as other say; up to them.

 

Yep, I've always paid for a wife, nobody would want me for myself.

Not sure about the self esteem/worth bit though, I just like having something warm and soft in bed at night.

Edited by MaeJoMTB

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