When Farangs Go Native

[MaeJoMTB]

57 minutes ago, curtklay said:

So what is a foreigner supposed to do when receiving a wai from a store clerk or some other "junior"?

Wai back, ignore them, or flip them the bird?

No need to do anything, serving staff should be below your notice.

[jvs]

Just now, MaeJoMTB said:

No need to do anything, serving staff should be below your notice.

What happened to    it's nice to be important but it's more important to be nice?

[impulse]

30 minutes ago, Enoon said:

A slight dip of the head, "thankyou" (Thai is great, but English will be fine) and a smile will suffice perfectly well.

 

So, in an exchange like that, which farang has gone native? 

 

Is it the one who returns a greeting with a reciprocal greeting- like they would back home, or the one who returns a greeting with a gesture that indicates they know they're of a higher status than the person who waied them?  (Edit: which would be considered quite the snub back home, BTW)

 

Edited January 31, 2018 by impulse

[impulse]

2 minutes ago, MaeJoMTB said:

No need to do anything, serving staff should be below your notice.

 

Now, that's going native...  And not in a good way.

 

[MaeJoMTB]

1 minute ago, impulse said:

or the one who returns a greeting with a gesture that indicates they know they're of a higher status than the person who waied them

 

If a Thai wai's me, they've already indicated my 'higher status'.

[Songlaw]

1 hour ago, curtklay said:

So what is a foreigner supposed to do when receiving a wai from a store clerk or some other "junior"?

Wai back, ignore them, or flip them the bird?

A curt nod with a reserved smile will generally suffice. 

[impulse]

Just now, MaeJoMTB said:

If a Thai wai's me, they've already indicated my 'higher status'.

 

Even if that were true, (and it's not)  there's absolutely nothing wrong with acknowledging that the other person has value as a fellow human being.

 

I've been waied by lots of Thais whose status -financial, societal, and political- puts my own to shame.  They're being polite, not bowing to my superiority.

 

[MaeJoMTB]

6 minutes ago, impulse said:

I've been waied by lots of Thais whose status -financial, societal, and political- puts my own to shame.  They're being polite, not bowing to my superiority.

I would agree that may appropriate for you, but I'm very white, old, wise, rich and educated.

(not to mention hansum)

[Peterw42]

12 minutes ago, impulse said:

 

So, in an exchange like that, which farang has gone native? 

 

Is it the one who returns a greeting with a reciprocal greeting- like they would back home, or the one who returns a greeting with a gesture that indicates they know they're of a higher status than the person who waied them

 

A similar example back home would be a waiter may refer to you as Sir/ madam, Mr etc. but you dont often call the waiter Sir.

[connda]

Keen observers can instantly read who’s who from body language, without needing introductions to know everyone’s place in the pecking order.

 

I love the pecking order.  It's easy to figure out if you're being dissed and by whom, and if you understand where they stand in that same pecking order, it can be fun.  My favorite: Puu Yai in upper managerial positions.  Or for that matter, any Puu Yai.  I treat them in accordance to how they tend to act.  I've met some really wonderful people in high ranking positions, and they have my respect for their accomplishment, but on a personal level, they are equals. 
Then they're the type who think they are Buddha's gift to the world.  I been in the position to give their employees a higher wai then them.  I tend to ignore them. 
Reputable monks: high wai; really old villagers: high wai.  After 10 years here I know the nuances.  Watching Thais wai you - it can be fun.  When I get obviously disrespect or no respect (you can tell with body language and words) I tend not to play.  Just smile and leave it at that.  That's always a foreign's opt out. 
Then there are the Keen observer farangs:
"Ha, ha! You waied a restaurant waiter.  You must be a newbie.  Ha ha" 
What? They guy over there?  He owns this place and he's a personal friend of mine for a number of years.. 
Back to looks can be deceiving.  Live here long enough and many of the people who are service workers, many of whom own their own businesses,  end up being personal friends and acquaintances, and yes, they do get wais from me like any Thai friend would. 

Regarding the author's ending note: "So go ahead and show some thoughtful deference to your adopted country, but stay committed to your legacy, keep your identity and find your dignity intact and much-admired for doing so."

Translated: "At the end of the day, you are and always will be Kon Daang, or "Different People" in the eyes of native Thais.
So for any Thai coming to America, " go ahead and keep your connection with you're cultural roots and heritage, but assimilate.  That's what the American Melting Pot is all about.  Then regardless of where you're from - You are an American!

Now, how different can our 'tribes' can be?  Pretty different.

Edited January 31, 2018 by connda

[Dmaxdan]

I can open a beer bottle using another. Does that mean I've gone native?


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[BigC]

I hate Forangs trying to be thai but also hate forang not respecting Thailand 

 

dont lile competition people competing to see who is more thai than the next man

who speaks the most thai

whos been here the longest 

 

it’s all <deleted>

[Peterw42]

16 minutes ago, MaeJoMTB said:

If a Thai wai's me, they've already indicated my 'higher status'.

Or they may just be saying hello, its not always a higher status thing, it can be a greeting amongst friends, thank you etc.

 

 

[Donotdisturb]

2 hours ago, Misterwhisper said:

I cannot even begin to describe how much I cringe when I see foreigners waiing everyone from supermarket cashiers to restaurant waiters, fish mongers in the wet market to go-go dancers, totally convinced that staying in the kingdom for a couple of months has made them "native" and that they're doing the right thing.

 

Even worse are those fellas I occasionally bump into at a bar,  those who think they have matured into genuine "Thailand experts" by spending two short vacations here and who feel compelled to start lecturing me about the Thai way of life, what to do and what not to do and who brag about their fantastic Thai-language skills (usually consisting of a few disjointed and wrongly pronounced words), and who are entirely ignorant of the fact that I've been living here for well over a quarter of a century, speak the local language almost fluently, and yes, know when, how and whom to wai. Brrrrr... shudder.

The best ones are the guys with local amulet, buddhist tattoo in neck and the obligate KHAPHOM (the only word they actually know and use 1.000 times an hour!). I'm one of those die-hard farangs who still shake hands with people around here (excluding women, solly solly) and most pooyai hotshots feel VERY honoured by doing so ?. 

[MaeJoMTB]

Just now, Donotdisturb said:

 and the obligate KHAPHOM (the only word they actually know and use 1.000 times an hour!).

They usually know 'farang' as well.

[Donotdisturb]

6 minutes ago, Dmaxdan said:

I can open a beer bottle using another. Does that mean I've gone native?


Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect

Only if you have a very long pinky fingernail...

[Donotdisturb]

3 minutes ago, MaeJoMTB said:

They usually know 'farang' as well.

Correct. As well as "samesame"... one of the most idiotic expressions after "khaphom"...

[canuckamuck]

Usually I: only Wai strangers who come to visit I don't wai first unless they are older. I don't wai people I know, they get a smile and a nod. I don't say Sawadee krap or other Thai greeting's I say hello because they all know that word and they like to say hello too. Same with Khap kuhn, I just say thank you, for the same reasons. When I need to have a conversation I first ask in Thai if they speak English. If they answer confidently I will talk in English. If they hesitate I continue in Thai. I can eat as spicy as anyone I know, but I prefer not to. I cook mostly western food for myself. I have eaten all manner of critters and their various parts, but I prefer not to. I don't know the names of any Thai celebrity's nor can I name a Thai song or a TV show. I can throw a cast net, and I know how to keep a good edge on my machete and how to use it too. But I usually get some else to do the jungle stuff. I can build almost anything using Thai materials, but I measure and plan and use tools made for precision. So I don't think I've gone very native in my 15 years. I simply adapted a minimum of behaviors.

[Donotdisturb]

1 hour ago, curtklay said:

So what is a foreigner supposed to do when receiving a wai from a store clerk or some other "junior"?

Wai back, ignore them, or flip them the bird?

If shes perky, young and cute: smile and pass her your business card. Thats what i used to do and had grrrrrrrreat fun.???

[connda]

14 minutes ago, Dmaxdan said:

I can open a beer bottle using another. Does that mean I've gone native?


Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect

It means you've probably made a living logging on the Olympic Peninsula or you're a snow-sport instructor. 

[Donotdisturb]

Look it's easy: if you skip foreplay and get directly to business and "finish" after 83 seconds u have gone native. Im 21 years in LOS and my thai nickname is still "BIG". Just saying 555 ????

[Mattd]

I see a lot of gone 'native' farang driving on the roads...................... 

[Donotdisturb]

9 minutes ago, canuckamuck said:

Usually I: only Wai strangers who come to visit I don't wai first unless they are older. I don't wai people I know, they get a smile and a nod. I don't say Sawadee krap or other Thai greeting's I say hello because they all know that word and they like to say hello too. Same with Khap kuhn, I just say thank you, for the same reasons. When I need to have a conversation I first ask in Thai if they speak English. If they answer confidently I will talk in English. If they hesitate I continue in Thai. I can eat as spicy as anyone I know, but I prefer not to. I cook mostly western food for myself. I have eaten all manner of critters and their various parts, but I prefer not to. I don't know the names of any Thai celebrity's nor can I name a Thai song or a TV show. I can throw a cast net, and I know how to keep a good edge on my machete and how to use it too. But I usually get some else to do the jungle stuff. I can build almost anything using Thai materials, but I measure and plan and use tools made for precision. So I don't think I've gone very native in my 15 years. I simply adapted a minimum of behaviors.

After 21 years i still outsource a pineapple (cutting) job. I love watching it and feel important when they spend utter dedication and concentration taking all dots out. They will also taste it for me and suggest eating pure (if waan) or with salt (if priow). I ❤ thailand!!!

[Franko666]

3 hours ago, kotsak said:

Too paraphrase it, When in Rome, do the Romans..

You mean like go for the back door????

[mick220675]

Reading the full articular I think they want Thai people to stop westerners adopting Thai ways, as they are trying to prove they are sophisticated  by adopting western ways.

 

Any way I need to get back to my dog I don't like it well done.

[Donotdisturb]

8 minutes ago, Franko666 said:

You mean like go for the back door????

That's what that VIRGIN cocos oil is made for isnt it????

[canuckamuck]

13 minutes ago, Donotdisturb said:

After 21 years i still outsource a pineapple (cutting) job. I love watching it and feel important when they spend utter dedication and concentration taking all dots out. They will also taste it for me and suggest eating pure (if waan) or with salt (if priow). I ❤ thailand!!!

My daughters bring cut fruit up to my office, makes me feel like a poo yai. I don't know how to run the rice cooker, someone always beats me to it.

[Donotdisturb]

4 minutes ago, canuckamuck said:

My daughters bring cut fruit up to my office, makes me feel like a poo yai. I don't know how to run the rice cooker, someone always beats me to it.

55. The rice cooker is the easiest thing ever: you *buy* it and the others do the rest!!!???

Edited January 31, 2018 by Donotdisturb

[Neeranam]

2 hours ago, johng said:

 

My wife often calls me "farang kee-nok
I agree and the call her " khon Thai grajock" we both then laugh.

 

Don't you mean farang kee NGOK ?

There's a big difference.

Off my wife called me farang kee  nok, she wouldn't be my wife.

[Neeranam]

23 minutes ago, mick220675 said:

Reading the full articular I think they want Thai people to stop westerners adopting Thai ways, as they are trying to prove they are sophisticated  by adopting western ways.

 

Any way I need to get back to my dog I don't like it well done.

I think it's rather pathetic, from a Thai who no doubt studied in a foreign culture. Maybe she was laughed at, or called a chinky in England when she was a kid and still has a chip on her shoulder. 

As for the Australian writer, she means Andrew Biggs. Nice guy who probably has more money than her, as does Chirsty and Jonas, who are huge here and she is jealous.

 

Reading between the lines, this old hag is just a pure racist. Nothing wrong with integrating into a new culture, but I refuse to put a 5 baht coin in my ear when on a bus.

Edited January 31, 2018 by Neeranam