Reason: Clean out the deadwood, spruce up verbal sparring skills, invigorate the gaga and Alzheimer inmates.

Rules: There are no rules except these, which must be stringently followed: No making of sides or factions. All battles are one on one combat. Any weapons are allowed except wet noodles and other pansy implements. Invasive, personal attacks must be cloaked in generalisms. No wearing of kilts on the battlefield. You may choose a non Bedlam member as an opponent. No fatal injuries allowed; you must let an opponent survive and suffer. No MOD attacks allowed, unless you know them personally and are prepared for a banning. Opponents do not have to fight back. Attacks on me, Jet Gorgon, are allowed, but you should have a good parrying strategy in place or I will get you.

Let the games begin!

Eeenie, meenie, miney, moe, who shall be the first to go?

I dont get it. What do I do? Slap you in the face with my soiled incontinence nappie ?

I dont get it. What do I do? Slap you in the face with my soiled incontinence nappie ?

Oh, was that you, Grover? Actually, the headtresses caught one of those midflight, ate the brown bits and then returned the cleaned product to the package. Not a problem. And, um, did you do something naughty? Ah, that Robski/Jet diatribe. Mmm, I might let Robski get you for that.

your a feisty one, aren't you! now that I come to think of it, you and The Lord Donz would be a perfect match!

Thanks for the cleanup by the way. But I was expecting some form of... counter attack or something. And me and Robski go back a long way. We are united by a common enemy, sorry can't mention any names.

this thread is most worthy of a hijacking, what do you think guys ?

Hi JetG

your a feisty one, aren't you! now that I come to think of it, you and The Lord Donz would be a perfect match!

Thanks for the cleanup by the way. But I was expecting some form of... counter attack or something. And me and Robski go back a long way. We are united by a common enemy, sorry can't mention any names.

Can you give us a clue on the common enemy bit (make it cryptic ...I love cryptic clues ?)

ok but it is a long story. It starts with a cup of tea and ends with an Oh!

No wearing of kilts on the battlefield.

That counts me out and also a few others on here.

No wearing of kilts on the battlefield.

That counts me out and also a few others on here.

Well, I might reconsider. What do you wear under it?

No wearing of kilts on the battlefield.

That counts me out and also a few others on here.

Well, I might reconsider. What do you wear under it?

I'm a true Scotsman.

But this is for you.

And another. BTW thats not me. It was a lone piper near Glencoe.

this thread is most worthy of a hijacking, what do you think guys ?

Hi JetG

I'm gonna getcha

Oh yes I will

Yes I will

I gonna getcha

Oh yes I will

yes I will

And I'm gonna make you beg for forgiveness and have you outta that wheelchair grovelling on your knees, Grover

Oh yes I will

Yes I will

this thread is most worthy of a hijacking, what do you think guys ?

Hi JetG

I'm gonna getcha

Oh yes I will

Yes I will

I gonna getcha

Oh yes I will

yes I will

And I'm gonna make you beg for forgiveness and have you outta that wheelchair grovelling on your knees, Grover

Oh yes I will

Yes I will

hmmm... ok, i'll give you that one.

Grover 2 - JetG 1.

And another. BTW thats not me. It was a lone piper near Glencoe.

Glencoe bein' western highlands he probly was never near The Monster Bar in Drumnadrochit...gotta chill wid 'ol Nessie by de lakeside, I say...

And another. BTW thats not me. It was a lone piper near Glencoe.

Glencoe bein' western highlands he probly was never near The Monster Bar in Drumnadrochit...gotta chill wid 'ol Nessie by de lakeside, I say...

You never know. He did have his own caravan with him. It was bloody cold out there too.

And another. BTW thats not me. It was a lone piper near Glencoe.

Lone Piper?

So, he had a tripod and a camera with a timer did he?

I had an acquaintance that played the pipes, he was popular at parties Pipes should be used as their original intent, to scare the living daylights out of the enemy, not a musical implement. (remember Mull of Kintyre)

Knobby knees on that piper.

Grover 2? On the floor you mean?

No way Grovy, this is my thread, I give the points.

And another. BTW thats not me. It was a lone piper near Glencoe.

Glencoe bein' western highlands he probly was never near The Monster Bar in Drumnadrochit...gotta chill wid 'ol Nessie by de lakeside, I say...

You never know. He did have his own caravan with him. It was bloody cold out there too.

was he sellin' haggis neeps an' tatties out the back?...if so, I know the dude...he's from Fresno, CA an' is a scots impersonator...(a good piper, though)

And another. BTW thats not me. It was a lone piper near Glencoe.

Glencoe bein' western highlands he probly was never near The Monster Bar in Drumnadrochit...gotta chill wid 'ol Nessie by de lakeside, I say...

You never know. He did have his own caravan with him. It was bloody cold out there too.

was he sellin' haggis neeps an' tatties out the back?...if so, I know the dude...he's from Fresno, CA an' is a scots impersonator...(a good piper, though)

Ya, I believe that, Tutsi. I don't think they have asphalt roads in Scotland. And what's this boy in a dress got to do with B in B?

No way Grovy, this is my thread, I give the points.

Too bad. Change of positions.

Knobby knees on that piper.

Grover 2? On the floor you mean?

The floor is fine by me.

Grover 2 - JetG 4

4 on the floor.

No way Grovy, this is my thread, I give the points.

Too bad. Change of positions.

Knobby knees on that piper.

Grover 2? On the floor you mean?

The floor is fine by me.

Grover 2 - JetG 4

4 on the floor.

It would be 87 on the floor with my tresses in attendance, and you ain't never gonna see that day, honeybunny in geriatric perambulator with special carrier for incontinence wipes and diapers.

And another. BTW thats not me. It was a lone piper near Glencoe.

Glencoe bein' western highlands he probly was never near The Monster Bar in Drumnadrochit...gotta chill wid 'ol Nessie by de lakeside, I say...

You never know. He did have his own caravan with him. It was bloody cold out there too.

was he sellin' haggis neeps an' tatties out the back?...if so, I know the dude...he's from Fresno, CA an' is a scots impersonator...(a good piper, though)

Ya, I believe that, Tutsi. I don't think they have asphalt roads in Scotland. And what's this boy in a dress got to do with B in B?

sumone said that pipers wanna scare the shit outta peeps when entering battle...on topic I would think . they got asphalt roads in Scotland...I had a Skoda that broke down in the Spey Valley...passed out near a vat ob mash by one ob the distillieries...

And another in Edinburgh.

Or another...Wonder who this is?

New year this year in Sydney.

The OP is mercilessly calling me names.

Oh well, its hijacking time for grandpa.

fer me, mate...if it ain't Glasge it ain't Scotland...(speaking as a true green celtic supporter...)

Ms gorgon, there is sectarian violence in Scotland, usually played out with local football clubs...if we are discussing battles on bedlam let's get out the baseball bats, broken beer glasses and let the bon temps roulet...

fer me, mate...if it ain't Glasge it ain't Scotland...(speaking as a true bluenose supporter...)

Just for you tutsi!

And this. :D

And another in Edinburgh.

Looks like the blower is constipated. Not allowed in this battle. We got enough poo slinging from Grover.

I said no kilts on the <deleted> battlefield. Knock it off!

And another in Edinburgh.

Looks like the blower is constipated. Not allowed in this battle. We got enough poo slinging from Grover.

They both look constipated. Speaking of poo slinging, the lady looks like she is in the middle of selecting some choice projectile for an unfortunate victim, JetG perhaps.