A guy is walking around town when he sees a bar with a sign advertising "All the Beer You Can Drink for $1!" He thinks that's a great deal so he goes in, sits down, hands the bartender a dollar, and asks for a beer."Sure, right away" says the bartender as he pulls out a tiny shot glass and fills it up halfway.The man is stunned. "What the hell is this?" he asks."That's all the beer you can drink for $1."

I just found out my wife does not have Terete syndrome, after all. Apparently I really am  a <deleted>, and she does want me to <deleted> off. 

A father of a church, was conducting his anti drinking campaign outside a bar. 

 

A man came out of the Bar exuding alcohol fumes.

 

The father said - "Tell me!!!  son, If you arrive at the Gates of Heaven with your breath smelling of liquor... Do you think the Lord will let you in ???"

 

"My good father" passionately holding his hand, said the man, "You know, when I go to Heaven, I leave my breath behind.

 

Moral...
Alcoholics are always practical. Kindly Respect them!

Saint Vodka