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Posted

It's Rea; simple:  A leopard NEVER changes his spots....don't expect her to.  I keep it simple, it either works or doesn't.  I'm not here on this earth to rehabilitate peoples messed up vice filled life.  If they don't want to change, how the heck can I do it for them? 

Posted

I will never understand 2 things:

 

- why guys marry a Thai if they do not need her for visa ?

- why guys divorce when it's so easy to remain married and get a yearly visa ?

 

Are you stupid enough to look for love of another one ? Or getting married once finally helped you to understand that only idiots marry anyone ?!

 

 

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Posted
6 minutes ago, myjawe said:

I will never understand 2 things:

 

- why guys marry a Thai if they do not need her for visa ?

- why guys divorce when it's so easy to remain married and get a yearly visa ?

 

Are you stupid enough to look for love of another one ? Or getting married once finally helped you to understand that only idiots marry anyone ?!

 

 

probably that; if it's good enough for the Goose, it's good enough for the Gander, to try!

Posted
4 minutes ago, tifino said:

probably that; if it's good enough for the Goose, it's good enough for the Gander, to try!

1. Some marry and get a visa for them to live in their home country, many...

2. Many times divorce isn’t optional....

 

Posted
2 hours ago, Dolmance said:

If they don't enjoy mutual oral sex (69) for a minimum of 90 minutes a day, they don't really love you.  If they don't masturbate furiously during intercourse, they don't love you.  If they don't suggest you both go to bed before either of you are tired at least five days a week, they don't love you.

 

If they enjoy all these things, then they love you and you should probably get married, unless they suffer from alcoholism.  If they suffer from alcoholism, no matter how good it seems, you need to run like they were a house on fire.

 

That's the simple truth of it. 

And are you saying then that none of your girlfriends enjoyed what you described for the durations detailed, the reason you never married one ?  Pity that all the ones I knew did. Bloody tiring I'll tell you. My JT is now only a sliver of its former self.  You not hansum man obviously ????

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Posted (edited)
4 minutes ago, geoffbezoz said:

And are you saying then that none of your girlfriends enjoyed what you described for the durations detailed, the reason you never married one ?  Pity that all the ones I knew did. Bloody tiring I'll tell you. My JT is now only a sliver of its former self.  You not hansum man obviously ????

And get on ya horse and drink ya milk bez lol

Edited by Graviton
Lol
Posted
On 6/1/2019 at 7:20 AM, vinniekintana said:

They all have the emotional maturity of a 12 year old.

Glad you bolted.

Them all??

Posted
On 6/1/2019 at 10:49 AM, Kenny202 said:

I have a very similar story as do many thousands of others. I assume she was probably from a bar, forgive me if not the case. It's very rare they will settle. We assume we are taking them away from a horrible life but the truth is they like it. They usually come from criminal, abusive back grounds / families and by the time they are past teens any heart or feelings they had have long been burnt out. They grow up being dominated and abused by men and now they have this perceived glamorous independent life, some disposable income. They are happy with the awful food they eat. A farang house to them is just 4 walls (like a prison)...they love to live outside, preferably chattering away with their friends. They will want a big farang house but only purely for bragging rights and the resale value of it. Same as gold. The smaller the house the better, less to clean...if they even make an effort to clean at all. It's like taking a monkey from the forest and putting in a zoo. Yep have nice clean place, 3 meals a day etc but still a prison. Same as taking them back home. Very few seem to settle down and adapt to what we would think was a better lifestyle. To them it is only suffering. Nothing wrong with any of this so far by the way. People want what they want and everyone is entitled to live how they wish. The problem is they are running a scam on you from the outset with only one goal. 

 

I was with mine for 5 years. Absolute heaven and hell. Totally psycho tirades that could go on for days for no reason. In the end the bad far outweighed the good to the point where it was becoming dangerous to live with her ever increasing violence and drama. Mine was diagnosed and being treated for (BPD) Borderline personality disorder. In hindsight she may have had some sort of previous drug problem also which would explain her constant restlessness and need to run all the time. She used to say she would get a "short" in her brain and lose control. Her face and head used to swell badly after a three day bout.

For me the most difficult part was getting shod of her and I think one of the main reason I stuck with her so long. I knew the drama I was going to have to endure. 

She used to pack her bags nearly every week. The last time I helped her put her stuff in the pick up. The relief I felt when we drove through the front gates of the estate. She was outside my gate screaming for the next three months. Hundreds of  nasty and threatening messages each day. After being apart 6 months, and her pleading with me everyday, I too also thought she had changed. We had a son together, left him with me when he was 3 months old. So for that reason I had to give it one more try. I agreed to take her back and after only a day I realised I had made a fatal mistake when she went berserk in the hotel room we were staying in. It then took me another 3 months to get her out of my home again, then another three months of harassing me every day. My son is still with me, been apart now 2 years and she has for the most part faded away, but I still think of her everyday, and I have no idea why. She was the most selfish, nasty, entitled person I have ever met. In her own twisted way I am sure she loved me but once they have sold their bodies they may as well have sold their souls. They just aren't human any more. 

 

She used to talk about black magic a fair bit, not that I believe in it nor did she come from a Khmer region. But it would certainly explain my total loss of reason in putting up with so much that I did. There just never seemed to be any reason for any of it it and it always seemed like we were so close to nirvana. A girl in a bar once told me never let a bar girl cut your nails. Apparently they use them in their spells 5555   

In Buddhist tradition, if a person’s spirit is not sent on his way after his death, the spirit will roam the earth and try to possess human body. Thai Buddhist tradition maybe lacking the process of sending the spirit to reincarnate or move on ( as somebody told me in Thailand) so there are millions of spirits roaming in Thailand. 

Posted

My take on this issue is that Thais are xenophobic in nature. The ruling party with their xenophobic outlook does not help matters. Given the tight family web around each Thai, it takes a lot to make the marriage work. Cultural differences make matters worse. So if the lady is from questionable background and is vulnerable to close associates’s opinions, it takes little to set the ball rolling in unraveling the marriage child or no child. 

So unless the lady is level headed, financially independent  and strong minded enough to withstand all the barrages coming her way, just love is not enough to hold the union together forever. 

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Posted
3 hours ago, DUNROAMIN said:

At the end of the day, I would suspect that all Asian women are the same. I am still married to a Thai woman (50 years old), however, after a few years you slowly start to get the bigger picture regarding my wife and many Thai women. I don't think you can bring love into the equation as what I've seen with many Thai women, I am not sure what it is, but seldom do I see affection or warmth from Thai women, even towards they own family. If they say to you "I love you darling" it would be more a case of "I love your money" and their social status within the community. Who knows? what they think. When push comes to shove, as they say, I think their Thai family takes preference over everything else and your way down on the pecking order.

Stop giving hand outs to the family and see how things go from there, maybe you relationship from then on is not so rosey.

I still get my share of sex and looked after with meals and general house duties, so I cant complain too much.

My say, take or leave it.

Thai thinking. Love me love my family. This is also an Asian thing. You not only marry her, you are also married into the family and are expected to chip in your worth. 

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Posted
4 hours ago, White Christmas13 said:

Well I have no time to read all the replays but just to put in my 2 cents 

I am married to a Thai girl for about 15 years but due to my behavior we

separated a few years back and I live by my self now but on the other

hand she rings me every day to ask me how I am she drops in my place

some times and brings food and other items she is a very good friend of

mine now also my nephew stay with me some days during the week

she also knows that I have another Thai girl as a friend now but she

never complains she just tells me to be careful and no she was never a

bar girl she worked at a university when we met so just to tell you guys

not all Thai girls are bad there is also some really good ones

what is so funny BritMan you have any problems?

Posted
4 hours ago, Dolmance said:

If they don't enjoy mutual oral sex (69) for a minimum of 90 minutes a day, they don't really love you.  If they don't masturbate furiously during intercourse, they don't love you.  If they don't suggest you both go to bed before either of you are tired at least five days a week, they don't love you.

 

If they enjoy all these things, then they love you and you should probably get married, unless they suffer from alcoholism.  If they suffer from alcoholism, no matter how good it seems, you need to run like they were a house on fire.

 

That's the simple truth of it. 

Sick

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Posted
On 6/1/2019 at 9:49 AM, Kenny202 said:

I have a very similar story as do many thousands of others. I assume she was probably from a bar, forgive me if not the case. It's very rare they will settle. We assume we are taking them away from a horrible life but the truth is they like it. They usually come from criminal, abusive back grounds / families and by the time they are past teens any heart or feelings they had have long been burnt out. They grow up being dominated and abused by men and now they have this perceived glamorous independent life, some disposable income. They are happy with the awful food they eat. A farang house to them is just 4 walls (like a prison)...they love to live outside, preferably chattering away with their friends. They will want a big farang house but only purely for bragging rights and the resale value of it. Same as gold. The smaller the house the better, less to clean...if they even make an effort to clean at all. It's like taking a monkey from the forest and putting in a zoo. Yep have nice clean place, 3 meals a day etc but still a prison. Same as taking them back home. Very few seem to settle down and adapt to what we would think was a better lifestyle. To them it is only suffering. Nothing wrong with any of this so far by the way. People want what they want and everyone is entitled to live how they wish. The problem is they are running a scam on you from the outset with only one goal. 

 

I was with mine for 5 years. Absolute heaven and hell. Totally psycho tirades that could go on for days for no reason. In the end the bad far outweighed the good to the point where it was becoming dangerous to live with her ever increasing violence and drama. Mine was diagnosed and being treated for (BPD) Borderline personality disorder. In hindsight she may have had some sort of previous drug problem also which would explain her constant restlessness and need to run all the time. She used to say she would get a "short" in her brain and lose control. Her face and head used to swell badly after a three day bout.

For me the most difficult part was getting shod of her and I think one of the main reason I stuck with her so long. I knew the drama I was going to have to endure. 

She used to pack her bags nearly every week. The last time I helped her put her stuff in the pick up. The relief I felt when we drove through the front gates of the estate. She was outside my gate screaming for the next three months. Hundreds of  nasty and threatening messages each day. After being apart 6 months, and her pleading with me everyday, I too also thought she had changed. We had a son together, left him with me when he was 3 months old. So for that reason I had to give it one more try. I agreed to take her back and after only a day I realised I had made a fatal mistake when she went berserk in the hotel room we were staying in. It then took me another 3 months to get her out of my home again, then another three months of harassing me every day. My son is still with me, been apart now 2 years and she has for the most part faded away, but I still think of her everyday, and I have no idea why. She was the most selfish, nasty, entitled person I have ever met. In her own twisted way I am sure she loved me but once they have sold their bodies they may as well have sold their souls. They just aren't human any more. 

 

She used to talk about black magic a fair bit, not that I believe in it nor did she come from a Khmer region. But it would certainly explain my total loss of reason in putting up with so much that I did. There just never seemed to be any reason for any of it it and it always seemed like we were so close to nirvana. A girl in a bar once told me never let a bar girl cut your nails. Apparently they use them in their spells 5555   

 

 

u have tons of wisdom and understanding especially from a psychological basis (1st paragraph)  agree a fair % come from difficult backgrounds. showing money and possessions generally in thai society is paramount because personal/intellectual development is lacking. it is image over substance cause thers not a whole lot of substance going around.

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Posted (edited)

You wouldn't marry a prostitute in your home country, so why do so many do it here?

 

You have to remember that a Thai woman's priority is her family, if you're unwilling to integrate with them and even try and prevent her from seeing her family regularly, it will never work.

 

Even with the pitfalls and risks associated with marrying into a foreign culture, I'd take a slightly less-educated and immature Thai lady over a bloated British lady who wants to wear the trousers any and every day of the week, it's no contest.

 

However, as someone as already alluded to, if your girl is a drinker, you're in for a serious roller-coaster ride, they just cannot handle their booze! I had a Thai girlfriend many years ago who would match me big Chang for big Chang back when Chang was much stronger - she would end up having a complete freak-out and going berserk pretty much every single time. It was a major, major headache and I gave up in the end which was a shame because she was probably one of the most attractive ladies I have ever met.

Edited by SteveK
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