Diary of a farang in Isaan

[bluesofa]

3 minutes ago, faraday said:

 Yes, it is UHT, but getting Chokchai in NBL is difficult, as often Makro no hab.

 

Which milk do you use?

 

????

 

Worried about the word 'chink' Mr Sofa, gotta be so careful these days. ( unable to elaborate) ????

I buy Meiji from Big C. I buy ten 830ml bottles and freeze them. Have done for years.

 

btw, I have no illegal immigrants hiding near the windows.

[Odysseus123]

45 minutes ago, faraday said:

Owl, what's da news???

 

I think Owl has"voting rights-but not "posting" rights" at the moment.

 

I could do that when I was banned and it continued until a helpful Mod pointed me in the direction of the TVF 12 Step Programme..."

 

"God grant me the serenity to refrain from the inevitable comebacks,the digital dexterity to type the things I can-and Wisdom to know the difference."

Edited April 23, 2021 by Odysseus123

[bluesofa]

2 minutes ago, Odysseus123 said:

I think Owl has"voting rights-but not "posting" rights" at the moment.

 

I could do that when I was banned and it continued until a helpful Mod pointed me in the direction of the TVF 12 Step Programme..."

 

"God grant me the serenity to refrain from the inevitable comebacks,the digital dextereity to type the things I can-and Wisdom to know the difference."

Yes, I seem to remember the same thing about 'voting rights' when I've wandered from the straight and narrow.

 

As an aside, your reference to 'digital dexterity' - I was always told it made you go blind?

 

[Odysseus123]

3 minutes ago, bluesofa said:

As an aside, your reference to 'digital dexterity' - I was always told it made you go blind?

But...you are still able to read the screen aren't you?????

(anxious enquiry)

 

As an aside..it is a beautiful soft autumn morning here..golden light,azure blue cloudless sky-about 14.C (09.20 hrs)

[Odysseus123]

Bluesofa.....it has been remiss of me but how is your recovery going?

Are you able to get out and about at all and relax in comfort?

 

It has been nearly a month since my legs gave up the ghost and have restricted my activities to my villa.

 

Tomorrow I hope to go via wheelchair to a Classical music concert in the local town hall (Bach and Grieg-an odd mix...????)

[bluesofa]

1 hour ago, Odysseus123 said:

Bluesofa.....it has been remiss of me but how is your recovery going?

Are you able to get out and about at all and relax in comfort?

 

It has been nearly a month since my legs gave up the ghost and have restricted my activities to my villa.

 

Tomorrow I hope to go via wheelchair to a Classical music concert in the local town hall (Bach and Grieg-an odd mix...????)

Thanks for asking.

I haven't posted much about it for a while, but once given the opportunity...

 

I was supposed to have gone to the outpatients orthopaedic clinic clinic a couple of days ago at Udon Hospital , I had an appointment.

 

I asked my wife to phone them to check if everything there was still running OK, with the increased number of covid admissions there recently.

She couldn't get through to anyone, I assume they were really busy.

In the end my wife phoned a school-friend who is a nurse there. Her friend very kindly went to the clinic with a photo of my appointment card.

The result was a new appointment made for two weeks time (reason unknown at present).

 

The only thing that worries me a little is that the follow-up X-ray on the condition of  my fractured spine has now been delayed.

 

I'm still supposed to spending the majority of my time laying flat on my back for three months for the fracture to mend. I have to wear a medieval metal-framed back brace during the day.

Sitting typing this now and having breakfast, then I'll go and inspect the ceiling again for a few hours.

 

Forgive me Odysseus, what exactly happened to cause your problem?

[Odysseus123]

2 hours ago, bluesofa said:

Thanks for asking.

I haven't posted much about it for a while, but once given the opportunity...

Thank you for your reply.It all sounds painful and restrictive and I hope that you get to your next appointment!

Me?Having fought off malignant Melanoma it was only one year later that I was diagnosed with mature onset Leukemia that leads to incredible fatigue and lethargy...and a weird sort of muscular dystrophy..a sort of "laughing legs" hence my classy mobility scooter..

The mornings are the best time..the situation deteriorates during the day.

No travel insurance for me..so I am vicariously travelling on this thread.????

[bluesofa]

46 minutes ago, Odysseus123 said:

Thank you for your reply.It all sounds painful and restrictive and I hope that you get to your next appointment!

Me?Having fought off malignant Melanoma it was only one year later that I was diagnosed with mature onset Leukemia that leads to incredible fatigue and lethargy...and a weird sort of muscular dystrophy..a sort of "laughing legs" hence my classy mobility scooter..

The mornings are the best time..the situation deteriorates during the day.

No travel insurance for me..so I am vicariously travelling on this thread.????

You seem to have had more than your fair share of 'defecation' or life-changing events as they are often described, yet you make positive posts here on TVF. I have admiration for people who can do that in the face of adversity, I don't know if I could be so strong.

 

I'm guessing your phrase 'laughing legs' could perhaps be used to describe someone who appears worse the wear for beer?

 

Take care, and I hope your classical music concert turns out to be 'wheely good' (sorry!) I hope those time-travelling troublemakers Bach and Grieg don't start a fight.

[Odysseus123]

57 minutes ago, bluesofa said:

I'm guessing your phrase 'laughing legs' could perhaps be used to describe someone who appears worse the wear for beer?

"laughing legs" mean that the 1 and a 1/4 legs will not bear my weight..it's a phase we used when I was a keen bushwalker and we would climb around Perry's Lookdown and Govetts' Leap..after a 1,000 steps the legs would turn to jelly.

 

I wouldn't have minded a beer at the top,tho'????

 

[HighPriority]

20 hours ago, Golden Triangle said:

If, like me Owl will be able to read & react to posts but not actually able to post, glad there is still some heart left in TVF in these very uncertain days & weeks ahead. 

 

Could someone please sack this bloody useless government. ????

So you can be banned, but still sort of, participate ? 
Only in Thailand... only Thai visa... ????????

[HighPriority]

10 hours ago, Odysseus123 said:

But...you are still able to read the screen aren't you?????

(anxious enquiry)

 

As an aside..it is a beautiful soft autumn morning here..golden light,azure blue cloudless sky-about 14.C (09.20 hrs)

20.5 this morning... ????

[Golden Triangle]

6 minutes ago, HighPriority said:

So you can be banned, but still sort of, participate ? 
Only in Thailand... only Thai visa... ????????

I know what you mean but I have to say that I was grateful for that opportunity, watching the (Thai) world going to hell in a handcart and being unable to have easy access to the latest information, not gossip, was a godsend, TallGuyJohninBangkok deserves a special mention for that. 

[HighPriority]

Don’t forget to use your scooter to max effect at the interval in order to get priority access in the beer queue Ody, no point not using your disability for advantage... ????????

[Odysseus123]

18 minutes ago, HighPriority said:

Don’t forget to use your scooter to max effect at the interval in order to get priority access in the beer queue Ody, no point not using your disability for advantage... ????????

The beer queue?

Are you the originator of that classic phrase "i wouldn't give a XXXX for Johann Sebastien Bach?"????

Tea, scones and lamingtons I would think..

However we are due at the RSL club at 5pm for ANZAC Day.A couple of drinks and then home...

[chickenslegs]

5 hours ago, Odysseus123 said:

The beer queue?

Are you the originator of that classic phrase "i wouldn't give a XXXX for Johann Sebastien Bach?"????

Tea, scones and lamingtons I would think..

However we are due at the RSL club at 5pm for ANZAC Day.A couple of drinks and then home..

I had to Google Lamingtons - it's just a cake. I was disappointed to find out that it's not a euphemism for something sexual.

[Odysseus123]

55 minutes ago, chickenslegs said:

I had to Google Lamingtons - it's just a cake. I was disappointed to find out that it's not a euphemism for something sexual.

Well...yes...tea,scones and cake..the normal Country Woman's Association fare.

It's a classical music concert not an evening with the Marquis de Sade

[faraday]

5 hours ago, chickenslegs said:

I had to Google Lamingtons - it's just a cake. I was disappointed to find out that it's not a euphemism for something sexual.

 

It may be "just a cake" but what these...err... gentlemen from down under do with it....

Is shocking????

 

I do miss a large slice of Victoria sponge, & a cuppa with fresh milk. Have yet to find a decent cake shop here in Issaan ( keeping it on topic)???? 

 

Or cooking apples, to make an apple crumble...????

[bluesofa]

6 hours ago, chickenslegs said:

I had to Google Lamingtons - it's just a cake. I was disappointed to find out that it's not a euphemism for something sexual.

You didn't look hard enough:

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-4113554/Comedian-Julia-Morris-covers-bosoms-jam-covered-lamingtons-hilarious-visual-gag-enjoying-dinner-date-Melbourne.html

[Odysseus123]

2 hours ago, bluesofa said:

You didn't look hard enough:

I think that that is called "kicking the conversational can down the road in the prolonged absence of our host...."????

 

Anyways..another beautiful autumn day..ANZAC Day.

 

[faraday]

The Monk who's walking about at the moment - dunno his name, arrived in Nongbualamphu this afternoon. 

 

Drove down the soi from our house to the big road, nose to tail traffic, many people forcing their way in, to get ahead. ????

 

100's & 100's of people lining the road to see him. I was impressed by their apparent devotion. If only they carried more of the Buddhist principles into daily life...

 

Took me 45 minutes to get to bloody Tesco's,  normally a 15 minute drive. Got out the car, the heavens opened, & I got soaked. But, it ain't cold, blighty rain!????️

 

The Witchfinder General was around this morning, dispensing their normal knee jerk reactions. (unable to elaborate) ????

 

Just having a nice cold Bud ????on the patio, dog by my side. Lovely.

 

Mrs F's making me Pad Thai tonight - awesome as usual.

 

Anything interesting wiv you lot tonight?

[bluesofa]

29 minutes ago, faraday said:

The Monk who's walking about at the moment - dunno his name, arrived in Nongbualamphu this afternoon. 

{snipped}

100's & 100's of people lining the road to see him. I was impressed by their apparent devotion. If only they carried more of the Buddhist principles into daily life...

{snipped}

The Witchfinder General was around this morning, dispensing their normal knee jerk reactions. (unable to elaborate) ????

A celebrity monk in town. I hope all the hero worship doesn't go to his head.

 

Very true about people carrying the religious beliefs into their daily lives, rather than trying to make themselves look important on special days.

 

Now you've got to give us a bit more about the Witchfinder General, don't tease us (well me anyway) like this. Elaborate just a bit more. I assume it wasn't the ghost of Vincent Price?

[faraday]

21 minutes ago, bluesofa said:

Now you've got to give us a bit more about the Witchfinder General,

 Comments on moderation are against da rools, blud.

 

????????????????????????

[GarryP]

1 hour ago, faraday said:

Anything interesting wiv you lot tonight?

Not tonight, but this morning. I was about to start rowing on my rowing machine when I heard an extremely worried "Garry, Garry, snake, snake come on down and do something" or words to that effect. Turns out there was a snake in our spare room which we use to store my tools, the clothes horse and other krap. Couldn't identify it at first and it tried to hide, but when I moved some stuff around I saw a bit of yellow/cream on either side of its neck and an O on the back of its neck. I've never had a cobra in my house before (only a golden tree snake, a sunbeam snake and a couple of others in the garden) so was a bit wary, but managed to scoop him up and let him go in our tiny garden, but not before he spread his hood to let us know he was pi55ed off. Unfortunately, I didn't get a picture.

 

Wife was not happy about me letting him go in the garden. Said we should have called someone to take him away. She was probably right (I'll never admit that to her), but I told her he would buๆger off on his own. 

 

And I have not even moved out to the sticks yet. Here I am in an end unit town house (hence the tiny garden) near Udomsuk in Bangers.          

Edited April 25, 2021 by GarryP

[bluesofa]

12 minutes ago, GarryP said:

Not tonight, but this morning. I was about to start rowing on my rowing machine when I heard an extremely worried "Garry, Garry, snake, snake come on down and do something" or words to that effect. Turns out there was a snake in our spare room which we use to store my tools, the clothes horse and other <deleted>. Couldn't identify it at first and it tried to hide, but when I moved some stuff around I saw a bit of yellow/cream on either side of its neck and an O on the back of its neck. I've never had a cobra in my house before (only a golden tree snake, a sunbeam snake and a couple of others in the garden) so was a bit wary, but managed to scoop him up and let him go in our tiny garden, but not before he spread his hood to let us know he was pi55ed off. Unfortunately, I didn't get a picture.

 

Wife was not happy about me letting him go in the garden. Said we should have called someone to take him away. She was probably right (I'll never admit that to her), but I told her he would buๆger off on his own. 

 

And I have not even moved out to the sticks yet. Here I am in an end unit town house (hence the tiny garden) near Udomsuk in Bangers.          

Wow an urban snake! It must have escaped from a pet shop, boy.

Me with a fear of snakes, I'd be from Udomsuk to Central Bang Na quicker than you could say vindscreen viper.

 

What happened to the clothes horse - was it bitten, has it gone lame? Have you had to put it down - tidily I hope?

 

P.S. Your rowing machine. Who normally wins, you or the wife? I suppose arguing could be seen as a hobby.

Edited April 25, 2021 by bluesofa

[sotonowl]

On 4/23/2021 at 1:42 PM, chickenslegs said:

Safety rail, no shoes outside the door, red bricks nicely pointed - so I'd guess not Thailand. 

Your close enough. It happens to be Hillsborough, home of Sheffield Wednesday whose owner Dejphon Chansiri son of one of the Thai Union food owners reckoned the 2 elephants would bring us luck. He was right, it's all been bad, and plenty of it.????

[chickenslegs]

1 hour ago, sotonowl said:

Your close enough. It happens to be Hillsborough, home of Sheffield Wednesday whose owner Dejphon Chansiri son of one of the Thai Union food owners reckoned the 2 elephants would bring us luck. He was right, it's all been bad, and plenty of it.????

That was going to be my second guess.

[Kadilo]

Hello chaps. Playing catch-up now back from another offshore trip from hell. 
I take it Owl has forgotten his pledge and got himself another holiday. And no stand in now the Vent man is away on a mission.

 

A question for all you knowledgeable Isaanites. 
What’s the going rate for a rai of agricultural land up there these days. Just the bulk standard rice growing in the middle of nowhere kind of stuff.  Accessible by dirt track. 
 

Ive got an idea of what I think it sells for by looking through the forum a while back but I’ve been offered a “deal of a lifetime” by someone looking to offload 10 rai. ????
 

Edited April 29, 2021 by Kadilo

[Golden Triangle]

1 hour ago, Kadilo said:

Hello chaps. Playing catch-up now back from another offshore trip from hell. 
I take it Owl has forgotten his pledge and got himself another holiday. And no stand in now the Vent man is away on a mission.

 

A question for all you knowledgeable Isaanites. 
What’s the going rate for a rai of agricultural land up there these days. Just the bulk standard rice growing in the middle of nowhere kind of stuff.  Accessible by dirt track. 
 

Ive got an idea of what I think it sells for by looking through the forum a while back but I’ve been offered a “deal of a lifetime” by someone looking to offload 10 rai. ????
 

I know nothing about land but yes Mr Owl is on holiday again, not sure when he's due back, maybe another 7 days or more ????

 

[voulez vous]

Hi farangsters - Vous here.

 

A few days leave before getting back to my secret mission under the mountains. Not enough time to visit any of my regular fillies up north, but there is a 'belle dame' in the shop giving me the eye. So she could be OK there.

 

I'm in Foix at the moment. In an all-night coffee shop in Rue Longue. The town is situated close to the borders with Spain and Andorra. Importantly for me; they have decent internet and, it appears, some grand ladies. I might get a bus to Toulouse later. See how it goes with Zoe; fille adorable. I'll have to check if she is a piège à miel (honey trap) but she seems genuine. Lovely green eyes.

 

Opened emails to see that Monsieur Owl has gotten himself a three week suspension. I do wish he would control those naughty computer keys.

 

He sent me some pics and annotation to post. Slightly out of date; but I'll post them for him; half now and some  a bit later. He was particularly peeved about his holiday as he had been clicking on the adverts on the site.

 

Not too much activity in his village over the songran holiday, but the children opposite - Poom and Ugg - were having a good time.

 

 

The cows were back.

 

 

There had not been any rain in Monsieur Owl's area so he decided to pump some water from pond three to pond six.

 

 

Water in that pond looks low to me. He definitely did the right thing.

 

 

The lady, just along from Monsieur Owl, bought her grandson a scooter. He is gradually sussing it out. Better on flat ground young man.

 

 

Owl's 'special unmissable bargain' arrived. Fishing rod, reel and hooks ordered and the bundle arrived last week. Well the hooks! Waste of 20 baht that was. I've told him; "bargains are not all they seem." But! Owl tells me that the hooks are gold coated and might be worth melting down. Interesting way to move gold about I thought.

 

 

Madame Owl's electric cutter arrived from Lazada; 608 baht.

 

 

Inspecting the goods.

 

 

Trying it out.

 

 

A bee house was spotted in the trees. Very nice honey. A bit different to the honey I'm familiar with.

 

 

Madame Owl bought some frogs for a decent Thai fry up.

 

 

Monsieur Owl felt sorry for them and let them go in number seven pond. Caused a bit of a row. He offered to pay Madame 45 baht for them. "They only cost you 40 baht teerak. Fifty baht shows a good profit." Got a whack. But says it was worth it just to see the frogs get their freedom. He did the same with snails a while back.

 

Don't know if these holidays are having an effect on him. Nothing nicer than a frog and snail stew; with onions, garlic and French bred. But he is East London and would settle for pie and mash any day.

 

I see Owl has updated his profile page. Chucked out all that football stuff.

 

I'm off for 4 days, so I'll post the rest of Monsieur Owl's meanderings before I return to mission control.

 

Take care out there farangsters.

 

 

 

 

Edited May 1, 2021 by voulez vous

[FarFlungFalang]

57 minutes ago, voulez vous said:

Opened emails to see that Monsieur Owl has gotten himself a three week suspension. I do wish he would control those naughty computer keys.

 

He sent me some pics and annotation to post. Slightly out of date; but I'll post them for him; half now and some  a bit later. He was particularly peeved about his holiday as he had been clicking on the adverts on the site.

Did you see me in holidayland Mr Owl?I could only manage a 10 dayer this time for telling the "still no eye deer" joke to lighten the mood a little then BAMMM!I did get a warning that it being my 8th incursion into holiday land my tickets will soon run out.I see the Oz Guv say it will gaol its citizens for 5 years or $60,000 if they dared travel from India and make it home to Oz.This will go a long way to create abandonment fears in many, they do the same to America when the US had worse numbers than India.Having just celebrated ANZAC day in OZ I can't help but wonder if after arriving at Gallipoli the diggers were told you're on your own and you not allowed to help your mates,what would they think of what being Australian means when the Guv will abandon its citizens at the drop of a hat.